Morning sickness- help!! Lonely :-(

[bignose78]

Hi. I'm new to this forum. I'm also a new mummy to be. 6.5 weeks pregnant after a year of trying. I know I should be super excited. Deep down I am. But this morning aka all day nausea is taking away all the joy. We also haven't told our family or friends as we want to get past 12 weeks before announcing. I feel so lonely and trapped. I can't seem to do anything. 24/7 nausea is draining me and really making me feel down. I feel very lonely. DH is being as supportive as he can but I don't think he fully understands the struggle.

Any tips or advice would be most appreciated.
I've tried all the usual stuff. I guess now the loneliness is getting to me.

Thank you

Hi

Congratulations on your pregnancy.

People will have many many tips for you, I tried them all and absolutely nothing worked for the constant severe nausea and vomiting I had, I got prescribed cyclizine from the Dr at 9 weeks and it got rid of my nausea and sickness immediately. It doesn't work for everyone but I couldnt have carried on with normal life without it, working full time and looking after 2 yo etc.

Sea sickness bands worked for a few days, there are other tips e.g eating ginger flavoured things (especially ginger chewy sweets from holland and barrett), nibbling on things, ice lollies etc,

personally i wouldnt suffer again and would ask for help from the doctor.

hopefully alot of other people will have some good advice, that's just what worked for me when nothing else did. thinking of you x

You are not alone! I'm 11 weeks and have felt like this all day everyday since 6 weeks. I'm also getting crippling headaches, almost like migraines. It is exhausting. The thing that kills me is the unpredictability of it - one day a banana helps a bit, the next it makes me want to hurl.

The only thing that has consistently helped is fresh sliced melon early in the morning. And eating something every two hours. And crunchy granny smith apples. And silently telling people who say 'I really upped my kale intake and exercise routine in the first tri' to fuck the fuck off.

Nor sure if that helped you but thank you - I feel much better after that rant!

Ps I also had fertility treatment. I did initially feel guilty for not 'enjoying every moment' but even a saint would grumble during 'morning' sickness

Pps As I'm not vomiting very often I haven't asked for drugs. Perhaps an error...

Don't be a matyr go to the doctors. No point in soldiering on. You might be lucky and it will stop get better or it might not.

But please go to the doctors and check out the

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/2751372-Hyperemesis-Support

Thank you so much everyone. I did have my first GP appointment and she did lightly suggest medication but I'm also worried any medication may cause harm at such an early stage. I'm not physically vomiting- but the nausea is really intense.

I guess having an outlet here to just be honest and open is also helpful as not being able to explain to people why I'm like this adds to it. I know in a few weeks (I hope) it will settle down. I guess I'm alsomso nervous about the pregnancy as it's so early still.

Thank you all again.

They wouldn't give you anything that would harm the baby.

I felt really lonely to, especially after a few weeks when my DH got a bit bored of it all. I tried to explain he couldn't be as tired of it as I was but I do get it was draining for him to. I'm now almost 12 weeks and it has pretty much passed. It does pass for most women, focus on it only being a temporary problem if you can. Eating regularly when you can really does help, as much as you don't want to. Also trying to find something, anything that doesn't make you feel sick. With ds1 it was sausage rolls. This time it's hot chocolate. Weird.

Thankyou LillyBug. My fear is he will get fed up/bored of it too. I guess he feels helpless. I sincerely hope it passes after 12 weeks. If it does continue - maybe I will have to go back to GP to discuss some medication. I just feel like I'm letting everyone down. Millions women go through this daily. So I feel like I shouldn't even be complaining at all and just be so grateful for the pregnancy (which I am).

OP I've talked to a lot of female friends about this in the last 5 weeks. From what I gather, the kind of severe nausea but not often vomiting that you and I have seems to put us at the worst end of the spectrum (people with HG are at the extreme worst end). The stats here are quite comforting www.pregnancysicknesssupport.org.uk

Poor you. Nausea reallly is awful and it can range from mild nausea which doesn't stop you getting on with your life to severe debilitating nausea which means you can't work or even get out of bed. It's difficult for others to understand and they probably underestimate it which leaves you feeling like you're a weak person or a failure. But don't underestimate it yourself, if you feel terrible then accept that and go easy on yourself. If it's having a serious impact on your functioning (like struggling to work/care for yourself/do anything) then that's more like hyperemesis than morning sickness, even if you aren't vomiting. Unfortunately, that doesn't normally go away at 12 weeks but more like mid pregnancy or beyond I'm sorry to say.
Rest is incredibly important in managing it so find ways to expend as little energy as possible, lie down as much as possible, cancel things in your diary if necessary.
I have suffered with horrendous nausea in two pregnancies and was diagnosed with HG. I did try an antiemetic medication but didn't find it helped much I'm afraid.
I found the pregnancy sickness support website incredibly helpful, especially the forum. And the mumsnet hyperemesis thread like someone else suggested. Good luck xxx

I was one of the lucky ones who had no nausea or vomiting with all three pregnancies. I wasn't even sick during labour. I did get the most horrendous headaches for nine months but I would take that against nausea any day. I hope this soon passes for you. My sister had extreme nausea and she found rich tea biscuits and salt and vinegar crisps helped her.

Thankyou all again. RedJumper- i thought it was only classified as HM if I was actually vomiting.
I've had to cancel work a few times and social engagements as I can't focus or engage really. I get maybe an hour on the day when I feel relatively normal. I am craving all sorts of junk food which is completely abnormal for me as I'm a personal trainer. Lol. Not good.

I'd add thinking about telling one or two family members who would be supportive. I know many people want to wait til 12 weeks, but like you say it can be so lonely with no one who understands.

I told my sister and my boss for support. Helped a lot.

Thanks schokolade
I think you are right. I did tell a friend. But don't think she fully understands. My sis has 2 girls- so she might be able to provide more support

Pick someone who has had sickness, and as recently as possible! The reality fades, fortunately!

Yeah you are right. Thanks.

There aren't any clear cut guidelines on when severe pregnancy nausea and vomiting becomes hyperemesis. It used to be classed as when you need hospital admission but that alone is daft really. I was so unwell I was house bound for 3 months, I couldn't work the whole time, I could hardly eat and drink for one month and I lost 7% of my body weight and I Became dehydrated at a couple of points so I definitely agree that was hyperemesis. Albeit with minimal vomiting.
The problem is that if it's really bad nausea which causes a massive impact on your life then 'morning sickness' doesn't do it justice, yet you also feel that hyperemesis is a bit fraudulent. Then you are in a very lonely place. The pregnancy sickness support service say they are there for people with any degree of pregnancy sickness and there are lots of women on there who have just nausea.

redjumper YY to everything you just said. I feel like a fraud because I'm not sick. But I've just spent most of the weekend in bed because I feel so terrible and doing anything made it worse.

Thanks. Well what you describe is a serious and valid illness and you are not a fraud. It can go on for ages so don't feel you need to suffer in silence. Really describe how bad things are to you doc/midwife/loved ones and get support.

My partner is also pregnant and had been diagnosed with HG after a hospital stay due to dehydration due to severe nausea and sickness, she wasn't vomiting constantly more like 3-4 times a day but it was all that bad combined that she couldn't keep down any fluid or food so just didn't/ couldn't eat or drink and then got ketones in her urine. She's also on medication , different than the one I was on as it didn't work for her.

And the majority of women are on anti sickness meds in the first trimester anyway as that's when it's worse. If it's affecting your day to day life then I'd recommend medication definitely. Xx

Thanks Chemistra. Hope she gets better real soon. I think sometimes it becomes more of an issue when it starts to affect you emotionally too. I'm trying to do all I can to not get too down about it - but some days are harder than others. I feel like I've had a mini personality transplant these past couple weeks and it's just taken me by complete surprise. I also feel like a fraud as I'm not physically being sick and no that women on the other end of the Spectrum are going through a much tougher time.

As a HG sufferer for the second time, I agree entirely with previous posters.

Personally I find the 24 hour a day nausea which makes me writh with agony and

Sorry posted too soon...

...which makes me writh in agony and panic MUCH worse than the vomiting itself.

Ondansetron (the strongest drug for this) has now got my vomiting under control so I have not lost any weight, and have avoided an admission this time. But the crippling nausea is there all the time, and for the rest of my life I will be traumatised by this sort of sickness, and absolutely phobic about vomiting.

I feel so sorry for you all, and do not believe for a second that you are suffering significantly less just because you don't throw up multiple times a day.

Wish you all the best!! We will get through this. I am now 10+3, and when I was 6 weeks I thought I would NEVER make it this far. But I have.

LHReturns my oh is on ondanestron.

And also my God I got her referred for pre natal depression as she was that changed personality wise, still not sure if it's just due to the nausea / sickness but it was definitely a contributing factor, she's still waiting to be seen by mental health midwife.

So I'd do whatever you can just to ease it as much as possible. And as previous poster said they'd never give you any meds that were a danger to baby. I've been on heart medication and anti sickness meds this pregnancy and baby is fine x

I guess everyone with severe nausea 24-7 for weeks on end gets very depressed. It's such terrible suffering, and as PP have said it's very lonely and isolating. I felt like I couldn't survive another day and then I'd wake up and feel even worse! I was treated badly by health professionals whose attitude was 'well that's pregnancy' with a shrug. It was a living hell and I fantasised about dying constantly. I was certainly depressed but how could I feel anything else? I certainly couldn't be positive! But as the nausea lifted and I got my life back the depression lifted too, it was very much linked to the suffering.