Why is finding a baby name sooo hard?!!

[Lwatkins]

I'm 19+1 so have lots of time to decide on names i know, it's just that it is too hard! I have heaps of naming books, have trawled my way through every baby name website that exists, listened to other peoples suggestions and still think there all pretty vile! I don't want a well known, common name that when it's said in a classroom - 5 kids all turn round at the same time. But at the same time i don't want something so obscure it makes people go - you what?? And a lot of old fashioned names are now coming back 'in', and i don't like these either! Also don't like any family names or biblical names as im not religious in any way. So when all this is taken into account, i cant ever find a bloody name i like!
How the hell do people name their kids nowadays? I'm killing myself trying to find any i like, let alone one i want to call my baby. I mean, it's a serious decision isn't it? The child has to live with it for the rest of his/her life, it's making my head spin. Has anyone else had this much difficulty naming their children, or coming up with names? And does anyone know where a good place to find names is?

For both DCs we had names chosen and changed our minds after the birth - the names we picked just didn't suit. Don't worry about it too much - I'm sure it will all sort itself out!!

We went bonkers deciding on a name for our first

And with DD we decided not to think about it til she was born as you've got a few weeks to play with.

THis time round we are doing the same thing, not thinking about it til baby arrives.

TBH, I would stop looking for a name, your baby won't be nameless for long!

My goodness thats a lot of strikes.

We decided between us that if baby was a boy I would name him, if a girl then dh would name her.
Dh wanted to name baby after his Mum as she died a few years ago. I wanted a name which I adored and always had.
We didn't know sex of the baby until birth and I got my choice!

I think that you shouldn't put too much pressure on your choice. Just read fiction books, watch movies, read film credits - a name will emerge!

Call the baby "umbrella" then. Umby for short.

Message withdrawn

lwatkins i am with you, once you start excluding it doesn't leave you with much - we added no foreign names either. if you are in a place where any deviation from james or ellie would be conspicuous or if you aren't willing to shout it across a playground then it might be worth compromising.

Pick a meaning that you like or is significant, and then see what names pop up. I think it's nice to know that a name has a special meaning.

My ds' name means "Gift from God" I found out I was pregnant a week before my father passed away. The family found it nice to have something to look forward during such a hard time. So I think God sent him to us, for a special reason.

watch a film you really love, then look at the credits for inspiration!

I had decided on my children's names before I met dh, so merely informed him of what the name would be for a girl or a boy Interestingly, not sure what I will do with the 'spare' name now ds has occupied my boy's choice; will I use the girl's name next time around? (If it is a girl, obviously!) - dunno, might seem a bit 'understudy-ish'.

Perhaps it would help to choose a middle name first - as then you can be more guided by family influences / grandfather's name, etc. Once that's established, choose something to go with?

I find myself looking through baby name books and being able to strike a big blak line through most of them but find it really hard to find some that we both actually like, go with the surname, go with the DSs' names, don't belong to anyone else we know well etc etc

We went for walks around graveyards to get some inspiration as well

(BTW - I am 33 weeks and we haven't come up with a definitive boys name yet!)

MKG that's a good idea about finding a nice meaning - hadn't thought of that one. Have looked at lots of credits of films and sadly still no luck. I know it may seem early to start thinking of names, it's just i thought it'd be better to start earlier than wait until bean is born and go, uuuuummmmmmmm. Have my 5 month scan on the 8th jan, i'll hopefully find out the sex which means i can focus on finding a name for just one sex instead of two! Is it me or is 'bean' starting to sound good!!!!!

Bean is the name of my puppy! The other one is called Sprout. Find it very confusing when people refer to their beans. God help this baby-despite the name being shot down in flames here a while ago I still like the name Serendipity!

If it's what you like itsazoo - then go for it. At the end of the day it doesn't really matter wether or not others like it, just as long as you do. It's your child so do what YOU want. You don't need others approval. Everytime i suggest names to family/friends they say mmmmmm, or not that keen. They like more 'traditional' names, which is fine - i just personally don't really like them and find them common choices for others which is not what im after! I happen to think it's a pretty name, if you like it, whack it on your list!!!

Have a look at this lot!

Top 100 boys' names for 2006
Last Updated: 2:03am GMT 21/12/2006

1 Jack

2 Thomas

3 Joshua

4 Oliver

5 Harry

6 James

7 William

8 Samuel

9 Daniel

10 Charlie

11 Benjamin

12 Joseph

13 Callum

14 George

15 Jake

16 Alfie

17 Luke

18 Matthew

19 Ethan

20 Lewis

21 Jacob

22 Mohammed

23 Dylan

24 Alexander

25 Ryan

26 Adam

27 Tyler

28 Harvey

29 Max

30 Cameron

31 Liam

32 Jamie

33 Leo

34 Owen

35 Connor

36 Harrison

37 Nathan

38 Ben

39 Henry

40 Archie

41 Edward

42 Michael

43 Aaron

44 Muhammad

45 Kyle

46 Noah

47 Oscar

48 Lucas

49 Rhys

50 Bradley

51 Charles

52 Toby

53 Louis

54 Brandon

55 Isaac

56 Reece

57 Kieran

58 Alex

59 Finlay

60 Finley

61 Mason

62 Kai

63 Logan

64 Riley

65 Freddie

66 David

67 Harley

68 Jayden

69 Mohammad

70 Kian

71 Bailey

72 Sam

73 Joel

74 Leon

75 John

76 Robert

77 Ellis

78 Joe

79 Luca

80 Billy

81 Corey

82 Ashton

83 Evan

84 Taylor

85 Christopher

86 Aidan

87 Elliot

88 Hayden

89 Morgan

90 Jay

91 Dominic

92 Theo

93 Zachary

94 Sean

95 Sebastian

96 Reuben

97 Andrew

98 Gabriel

99 Frederick

100 Ewan

Top 100 girls' names for 2006
Last Updated: 2:03am GMT 21/12/2006

1 Olivia

2 Grace

3 Jessica

4 Ruby

5 Emily

6 Sophie

7 Chloe

8 Lucy

9 Lily

10 Ellie

11 Ella

12 Charlotte

13 Katie

14 Mia

15 Hannah

16 Amelia

17 Megan

18 Amy

19 Isabella

20 Millie

21 Evie

22 Abigail

23 Freya

24 Molly

25 Daisy

26 Holly

27 Emma

28 Erin

29 Isabelle

30 Poppy

31 Jasmine

32 Leah

33 Keira

34 Phoebe

35 Caitlin

36 Rebecca

37 Georgia

38 Lauren

39 Madison

40 Amber

41 Elizabeth

42 Eleanor

43 Bethany

44 Isabel

45 Paige

46 Scarlett

47 Alice

48 Imogen

49 Sophia

50 Anna

51 Lola

52 Libby

53 Maisie

54 Isobel

55 Brooke

56 Alisha

57 Tia

58 Sarah

59 Summer

60 Gracie

61 Faith

62 Courtney

63 Niamh

64 Ava

65 Eve

66 Aimee

67 Maddison

68 Rosie

69 Matilda

70 Sienna

71 Shannon

72 Lilly

73 Madeleine

74 Zoe

75 Nicole

76 Eva

77 Skye

78 Amelie

79 Abbie

80 Harriet

81 Maya

82 Zara

83 Rachel

84 Francesca

85 Lydia

86 Alicia

87 Hollie

88 Sofia

89 Alexandra

90 Layla

91 Natasha

92 Mollie

93 Morgan

94 Isla

95 Demi

96 Laura

97 Lara

98 Tilly

99 Martha

100 Eloise

We had similar criteria to you tbh. In the end, we just bought a huge book of babies' names and looked through it separately.

We then wrote down a list of twenty names each that we liked, and picked the ones that were on both lists.

(We chose a boy's name easily and most people agreed with us. However, much as dh and I loved the name Morag for a girl, absolutely no one else did. Lucky we're due a boy, really!)

I think it will come to you eventually. One or more names from all of the ones you have read will drift up, probably in the middle of the night

Whatever you do, don't start a thread asking for opinions on your short list! They always get nasty.

We didn't know what we were having. If we had a boy dh wanted to name after his dad which was fine by me.

But we had a dd and her name is the only one we could agree on.

Not much help i know, but we just couldn't decide on a girl name.

As a primary teacher can I ask you to think of the poor soul when it comes time to learn to write. I have taught several Christophers who have labelled many pieces of work "Christ" as it is too much effort for them to finish writing their name! Also, unusual spellings of common names does not make your child seem unique and interesting - it just makes the parents seem illiterate! Another tip - no matter how grateful you are to the person who gives you painrelief during labour, don't agree to name the baby after them!
Having said all this, don't stress about the name; with my ds and dd we had names chosen but when they appeared the names didn't fit and the perfect names just jumped into my head!

ooh, fortyplus, where did you get those lists from?

Not that I'm looking for names, but I am the nosiest person in the world when it comes to wha other people like...

Found it really easy to think of names for my two girls, but for DS it was a real struggle. Couldn't use my favourite boys name as Dh's son was called that, so trawled through lots of books, and both came up with a short list. His middle name was decided as i gave him my brothers name who had died 4 years earlier, but he was two weeks old before we decided on his first name, and guess what? It wasn't on either of our lists! I was feeding him in the early hours on the morning and his name just came to me! On the other hand my friend had a private scan to find out the sex of her baby and had him named by the time she was 23 weeks pregnant, she said it helped her bond with the baby as a person and not as an "it"! I just feel that you have to see the baby first. I think you have about 6 weeks after the birth to make up your mind, so plenty of time to make the decision.

It took me and dp the whole pregnancy to think up one boy's name and one girl's name (we didn't know the sex).

Once we saw ds we knew it fitted him though. I found baby name books good, as it was a case of going through every name until we found one of each we liked. The boy's name we decided on was actually a family name for both me and dp - though that wasn't why we chose it. And middle names were simple, as we followed dp's family tradition of giving the child the parent's (father for boy, mother for girl) first name as a middle name.

SOme people don't name the baby till it is a few days old as they haven't gotten a name or it doesn't suit.

We would like another child someday. If we have a boy, god knows what we'd do

oh god, its like dogs

once they are named it sticks and then you can't imagine any other name

I rather like Umby

What about a name from a book you or your dp love? My son is named Thomas after a character in a book and his second name is Luke (after Luke Skywalker...my first love..!) Do whatever you want..its your baby. Good luck.

I quite like Umby too, Enid