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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

OK Independent Midwives, 20 Questions...

58 replies

Ceolas · 20/12/2006 21:07

... at least!

I have just found out I'm pregnant with baby number 4. 3 previous hospital births but no major complications. I wanted a homebirth last time but was talked out of it at 36 weeks. I am determined to have this one at home.

I am considering an IM for continuity of care and knowing that she'd be an expert in homebirth. It would be a lot of money to us so I want to hear your reasurrances that It'll be worth it!

Also, I'm not sure of the ettiquette of it all. If I book with an IM, do I see my GP? Community midwives? Consultant? Those who have, was there any resistance from your GP?

I'm literally only 4-5 weeks at the moment (tested on Monday), but want to get it right from the beginning!

More questions to follow

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
LieselVonGiftwrapp · 21/12/2006 13:33

Why were you talked out of home birth last time?

GhostOfMumsnet · 21/12/2006 13:34

Liesel you better not even think about a home birth!

geordiemacmincepie · 21/12/2006 13:35

Hey Liesel {{waves}}

LieselVonGiftwrapp · 21/12/2006 13:39

Oh my fanclubs here (((shucks))). Who are you Ghost? Dont need to identify your whole identitity just give me a clue. You obviously know of my past, but hey why wouldnt you, youre a ghost afterall.

LieselVonGiftwrapp · 21/12/2006 13:45

Aha sussed it, I fecken knew it was you
Have you finished work then? Jammy bitch

GhostOfMumsnet · 21/12/2006 13:46

Wooooooooo WOoooooooooooooo

I thought you had already found me out on another thread.

Hehehe I like having a secret!

GhostOfMumsnet · 21/12/2006 13:47

I finish in 40 minutes. But the whole school is in watching a panto and I'm bored!!!!!!!!! PLease don't tell DH he'll slag me forever!

Ceolas · 21/12/2006 20:16

I was talked out of HB last time because they thought DS was going to be big. He was 10lbs, but born relatively easy with only entonox for pain relief.

Had some very resistant comments from GP too

OP posts:
lulumama · 21/12/2006 20:17

this thread might help re homebirth

Glassofwine · 21/12/2006 20:19

I had my first baby with an IM and it was a total disaster. Be careful

Ceolas · 21/12/2006 20:20

Oh god, GoW

What happened?

OP posts:
kittyschristmascrackers · 21/12/2006 20:27

Im are expensive, a doula is a less expensive option but still gives you care.
Just insist on a home birth if there is nothing wrong with you and baby. It's your right to have one if you want.

SnafuOutOfHiding · 21/12/2006 20:36

Firstly, contact Independent Midwives Association for more info and help finding an IM in your area.

Contact the ones in your area and interview them thoroughly Lots of IMs have their own criteria about who/what they are comfortable with taking on, but if your history is uncomplicated you shouldn't have a problem. You don't need to see your GP or local hospital midwives/consultants - unless of course complications arise but again this is something that individual IMs may have their own arrangements about.

Ceolas · 21/12/2006 20:38

Are you a student mw, snafu? Did I imagine it?

OP posts:
SnafuOutOfHiding · 21/12/2006 20:41

Well, that's what it says on my badge, but I really do wonder...

Ceolas · 21/12/2006 20:46

Not complicated...

Just wondering what the opinion of IMs is amongst NHS MWs? I suspect my GP would have a fit at the thought. She told me after having DS in hospital that she was very glad to her I'd been sensible about it and didn't know a MW or GP who would subject their baby to the risks of HB. I was and tbh.

OP posts:
Mo2 · 21/12/2006 20:54

Hi Ceolas

I had an IM for DS2 when I found I was in serious disagreement with the local hospital Ob about everything they wanted to do to me i.e. an elective caesarean...

FOund her through the link from Snafu and got on very well immediately. It was fantastic not having to go to the surgery/ hospital for everything - she just came to my home and did all monitoring and even bloods etc there - very relaxing.

I has quite a traumatic birth with DS1 and she really helped me to think through how I wanted DS2's birth to be different. Although we planned for a home birth, in the end we switched to a hospital when I went 42 +3 overdue, and in the end I had another CS, but it was a truly different experience. My recovery was also much quicker - again it was blissful having her visit at home for up to 6 weeks after the birth. I remember with DS1 having to lug him in his heavy car seat to the surgery for my checks - and just 2 weeks after a CS !!
The only thing I found a little hard was that she had quite strong views about things like homebirth, reflexology for bringing on labour, etc and I didn't always share them.

Although she was professional to the last visit, I actually felt that she was a little 'disappointed' by my CS birth - she made an unfortunate comment about it bringing down her 'homebirth average' stats . That said, I would heartily recommend it for the total 'wraparound care' before and after. That's not something a doula would be able to do, I don't think?

thankyoupoppetunderthetree · 21/12/2006 20:54

I'm going for another atempt at homebirth this time round, I say attempt as last time I thought I had had it all planned to perfection only I hadn't bargained for 2 nervous, inexperienced and unprofessional midwives to turn up and ruin it all! (that was with ds2)

fortunatly when I got to hospital in an ambulance that they had called for me, I was met by a very calming and experienced midwife (called Kate) who helped me deliver my baby with great ease.

This time round, I too thought about birth planning straight away, and I approached kate to ask if she could be my indipendent m/w at home.

She has just told me that she would love to put herself on call for me which is great, but before I heard this news I was seriously reconsidering the h/b as a good/bad midwife can make a huge difference.

Our local hospital will find out if they are to be closed a month before my due date, staffing has been cut and my community mw has been qualified for only a year, which imo isn't long enough to undertake homebirths.

This is why i had to think very carefully.
So I guess I am trying to say that if your team are saying no, and your gp is also reluctant, try to find out why, as it might be because of underexperienced or underconfident staff.

otoh, if it is just because they are stuck in the dark ages then thats no excuse! (maybe you could change things in that case?)

Not sure if I have been at all helpful, but when I planned my hb with ds2, I had it all worked out; birthpool, hypnotherapy sessions the works, I was having a natural delivery at home and that was final. But the mw that were on call, I had never met and they sent me to hospital for no good reason whatsoever at all. I had a perfectly normal labour and delivery, they just panicked because it took a few hours longer than my first baby.

SnafuOutOfHiding · 21/12/2006 20:56

Well, it varies I guess. I'm sure you could find a fair few mws who would say that indies are dangerous outlaws but equally there are people like me who would love to practise independently (with a few caveats).

GPs on the other hand, are notoriously twitchy about HB and indie mws in particular. Of course some are more enlightened but sadly it doesn't surprise me that you had so much opposition. However, indies are all qualified mws and all are subject to exactly the same rules and regulations as hospital mws, including a responsibility to keep up-to-date and continue their professional education.

Mo2 · 21/12/2006 20:58

Doesn't sound like your GP is very well-informed them, as the risks are not particularly high, especially if you have given birth naturally previously.

THe problem with many NHS MWs now is that they have not been trained in traditional midwifery skills needed for homebirth since so many babies are born in hospitals. Someone once told me that MWs these days are really just Obstetrician's Assistants

SnafuOutOfHiding · 21/12/2006 21:02

Some of us try hard not to be, Mo

thankyoupoppetunderthetree · 21/12/2006 21:02

Mo2 you have just reminded me of something..

I am a paed nurse when I first started to tell my colleages about planning a homebirth with ds2 the majority were horrified for some reason which really surprised me. I think it is because some nurses and doctors are very medical in their thinking and that can easily become a culture of a gp unit/ward etc. just as easily as some gp units can be very alternative thinking in their culture.

(also I have read back my thread and feel it might sound a little midwife bashy but that was not at all the intention, mostly they are fab, its their rescourses that are lousey)

Ceolas · 21/12/2006 21:04

The last time I felt as if nobody was positive about HB at any point. The community MWs all said wait til 36 weeks. It was as if I had to pass a test then to be "allowed" a HB.

I just think pregnancy is not a time to be taking on battles.

OP posts:
thankyoupoppetunderthetree · 21/12/2006 21:05

can you easily afford an indipendent mw, if you don't mind me asking?

Mo2 · 21/12/2006 21:06

Poppet - I think that's what I mean... if you ask an Ob Surgeon the best way to give birth he's most likely to think with a knife, as that's his trade! Also these days many MWs assume this is 'best' because it's what is done most often.

Homebirth gets an unjustifiably bad press. I am sure there are money politics at play there too - after all, a MW attending a home birth is not available to see other women labouring 'next door' (as on a labout ward)