being asked about previous pregnancies

[Brightside65]

I had an early termination 14 years ago. Something I didn't tell anyone about and was 100% right for me.

I haven't told my husband and in all honestly don't think I should, my medical history before I met him is my business.

I was also concerned when we fell pregnant that I would have to declare to midwife about my previous pregnancy but I would do this and ask for info to be confidential. I knew I definitely need to declare it because I'm Rehsus negative blood and have had and will need anti d injections.

Cutting long story short I will be going to booking appointment myself and will speak to midwife. However I had to go for early scan during the week as I had little bleed. The hospital asked on phone my medical history and if I had been pregnant before I said about abortion and asked if this would be asked again I was told yes at booking appointment. I went for scan next morning sat in room with my husband and midwife said " this is your 2nd pregnancy" I said no I was so shocked, I spoke to her later when husband was out room and I was so annoyed.

I do not want to be worrying my whole pregnancy about this being brought up. Can I ask midwife for it not to be written in my book/ notes?

Also have a family member who works in maternity and told me she had seen my medical file while processing - it's causing me anxiety surely my medical history is my business this is 2015 not 1950.

Thank you diziechick that's really useful.

Thank you again to everyone who has chatted, still feeling anxious but need to have a good think about it all.

But none of that stops previous pregnancies being potentially relevant in labour re your cervix, as a previous poster said.

This is information on how it can affect subsequent pregnancies -

Sensitising is not usually harmful if it is your first pregnancy. But it can cause problems if you become pregnant again with another rhesus-positive baby. The antibodies that your body made in your first pregnancy can quickly multiply, cross the placenta and attack the blood cells of your baby.

The good news is that, because of routine injections of a substance called anti-D immunoglobulin (anti-D) to guard against the harmful effects of antibodies, complications are rare.

However, if you are not treated with anti-D, the immune response in your second pregnancy will be stronger than the first pregnancy and can cause rhesus disease in your baby. Your antibodies start to attack your baby's blood cells during pregnancy and can carry on attacking them for a few months after the birth.

When your baby's blood cells are attacked, rhesus disease causes anaemia. If the anaemia becomes severe, it can lead to life-threatening problems for your baby, such as heart failure, fluid retention and swelling.

I know I'll be sensible and declare it as I really don't want anything risking baby but I am still adamant that my medical history is mine and if I want it confidential it should be so will need to discuss with midwife how this can happen.

I'm pretty sure that anything you request to remain confidential will be.

I think the essential problem is that the way to make it confidential is for a third party not to be in the appointment.

They will do what they can,but likely your DP will have to be asked to leave for part of the appointments where it is relevant.

And in an emergency all bets are off.

Oh god, everyone is making this much more confusing than it needs to be.
The simple answer is that your TOP 15 years ago has literally no bearing on your current pregnancy, regardless of your blood group.
If you hadn't had the anti-D injection at the time, then it would be very relevant, but you did, so it isn't. You are within your rights to declare it, or not, as you see fit.
I am an ex-student midwife and have seen people lie at booking in appts (ie when mw asks about previous pregnancies). It's possible that as your midwife has access to your GP records, it will be on there as part of your medical history, so she might know anyway. But if you choose not to declare it, she cannot write it in your notes, and therefore to all intents and purposes it never actually happened. You may want to mention it to her, explain the situation, but ask her not to write it down, and then at least your main midwife is aware. Or not. It's entirely up to you. You don't HAVE to declare anything.
Your rh- status makes no difference to anything. You will need an anti-D injection at 28 weeks and potentially after birth in this pregnancy, the next one, every single one after. The protocol won't change.
If you're really so bothered that the TOP will come up again, I just wouldn't tell them. Easy.

Scan though - they just realise that partners will always attend scan. That's only time well birth of course that he'll be with me.

I agree in emergency then it can definitely be said.

Fourforyou thank you! Really appreciate your input and it makes perfect sense

Oh and there is no risk to baby, anyone claiming that is completely unfounded and making up rubbish. The baby will be fine and if it isn't, it will be nothing to do with the TOP and whether or not you tell anyone about it. I absolutely, hand on heart promise you that.

Thank you again, that really is reassuring and makes total sense.

What about if the OP already has anti bodies and this is picked up in booking bloods Four?

Then it still won't be related to the TOP, as she had an anti-D injection after that to prevent that exact problem. That is the point of anti-D! If by some strange far fetched chance she does have antibodies, it's probably from a pregnancy and subsequent miscarriage that she was unaware of.
(This is hypothetical OP, don't worry!)

Well quite. But you said her rhesus status makes no difference to anything. It does. It makes previous pregnancies - whether the known one or others - more likely to be relevant. More likely to affect her care path. More likely to have to keep telling lies to keep this secret. That was my point

'telling lies to keep this secret'

My confidentiality was breached. Simple as.

That makes sense. So because I've had the anti d injection, it prevents antibodies in next pregnancy.

With all other pregnancies it will same procedure in terms of injections during pregnancy and after labour.

That's what I wanted clarification on which you've explained. The relevance on 1st preg anti d injections and second. And if I didn't declare 1st preg what this means in terms of anti d injections in 2nd - but from what I've read and you've explained it makes sense

Not 'prevents ' like everything in medicine 'should prevent'

Libraries I'm not getting into it, I'm not really up for a nitpicky discussion of tiny details. Okay, I will accept that being rhesus negative has more potential implications than being rhesus positive does. But in this situation, it's not relevant to her current pregnancy, and this 'lies' business is bullshit. No one has some sort of God-given right to know every detail of OP's life story. She is well within her rights to tell any hcp she comes into contact with as much or as little as she chooses.
OP, apologies for the derailing going on. I wish you all the very best with your pregnancy!

Liney - your situation is awful. I wasn't commenting on it. But the OP said she was bad at lying. If she has antibodies, it will raise questions she has to explain and that will emotionally resonate as lying given the circumstances.

Thank you again for your input.

Emotionally resonate

I'm assertive enough to explain at anytime why I choose to withhold information. That was my point initially that I should have right to explain medical history of and when relevant but not wanting it written to notes or asked at every appointment was issue I had.

Four - that response applies to you too.

I am not derailing. I am trying to point out to the OP that she needs to think through everything . It's up to her whether she tells her partner. And I've told her that , IME, care is the same. But there are ways it can become tricky and it's worth considering that when deciding how to proceed. In some relationships, having to repeatedly say you've no idea why you have antibodies could be worse than opening up. Or it coming out in labour could be a disaster. that's all.

Oh whatever with the . I am trying to be helpful.

Good luck with the pregnancy. I hope it.goes smoothly.

I appreciate everyone's replies. Thank you

I would tell your midwife the truth at your booking in appointment but refuse to allow her to write it in your notes - you can honestly say that you do not trust your family member not to read it and you are concerned that your husband will find out. As previously said, it has no bearing on your current pregnancy and you have had the necessary injection so will not need any immediate treatment as a result.