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Original poster

Father of child has blocked me on everything. Feeling really low

56 replies

Gabby289 · 11/09/2015 01:48

Hi guys.

So I'm 10 weeks now and I'm considering going through a termination. I was meant to have one weeks ago but kept skipping appointments.

The father of the child at first was ready to support me during the termination until I started having second thoughts and grew more attached/worried.

The day I was meant to get a termination my phone stopped working. He tried contacting me though social media but I wasn't in the mood or right frame of mind so ignored me.

I had a scan done at the abortion clinic so they could see how far I am and I sent it to him and he said "don't show me that shit. You blocked me when you were meant to have a termination fuck off" and before I could respond he blocked me off everything.

I'm absolutely furious how young men think they can just absolve themselves of responsibility and just act like everything's okay and get on with their lives.

I feel like contacting his employers on LinkedIn and blasting him on my Twitter and making up some really horrible lie or allegation just so he can feel what I'm going through.

I'm absolutely furious and miserable

OP posts:
Leanneosaurus · 12/09/2015 08:57

I'm sorry but you sound like an awful game player. I saw your status and thought 'how awful' and then read the rest of the story. And by saying 'you guys are being mean and taking his side' you sound like you don't believe you've done anything wrong and if people don't agree with you, you have an issue with that. You sound like you want it all your own way. The fact that you want to spread malicious rumours about the babies dad, that's unhinged. For the love of God, I hope you realise how amazing your child will be, I hope it will change you and I hope it will make you realise that nothing else matters, just your child. Even if you do end up doing this alone. In fact, as hard as it might be, doing it alone will be so rewarding because when you're child grows up to be a beautiful, amazing person, you'll know that you, alone, raised your child right. I hop these words reach you.

Niki18 · 12/09/2015 09:11

Sounds like someone needs to go on Jeremy Kyle!!

fastdaytears · 12/09/2015 09:12

you guys are being mean and taking his side

OP can I ask how old you are? It might help us to understand

GoldPlatedShitGibbon · 12/09/2015 09:18

I'm sorry that you're going through a difficult decision, but you need to stop living your life on social media and grow up a bit.

Sending the scan picture is the behaviour of a 15 year old, as is trashing him on Twitter etc.

It sounds like neither of you are good at communicating with the other.

MrsDeVere · 12/09/2015 09:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EmmaGellerGreen · 12/09/2015 09:42

I really hope that this is not real.

BoboChic · 12/09/2015 09:45

OP - you are too immature for either a relationship or to bring up a child. Go ahead with the termination and get on with growing up.

pinkyredrose · 12/09/2015 09:50

If this is real (which I doubt) you sound way too immature to be a mother. I'd have a termination and quick and get contraception sorted.

Plus 'abortion clinic' Hmm these don't actually exist.

pinkyredrose · 12/09/2015 10:43

OP according to your other thread you gad unprotected sex with 3 men all within a few wks. Ffs get some self respect, condoms and an sti test. Do you know anything about sexually transmitted deseases? You said you were planning on a coil after the termination, that doesn't protect from disease, infections etc. You need to wise up and fast.

TenForward82 · 12/09/2015 13:59

"you guys are being mean"? I struggle to believe you're mature enough to be a mother. You've had lots of measured advice, which I don't have the patience to give.

You are not being clear or fair to the father of your child. You are in the wrong. Tough, but true.

LilacSpunkMonkey · 12/09/2015 14:03

Oh my...

Original poster
Gabby289 · 12/09/2015 14:09

Yes I've taken on board what everyone has said. I posted this at a time I was very irate and hurt that he just washed his hands off everything and continues to live his life like nothing has happened whilst I am the one who will suffer and endure any decision I have to make. It's not fair.
You guys aren't seeing how much of an arsehole he is and what he says and the disgusting jokes he makes about leaving women single mothers and general trash comments about women.

I admit I've been a bit reckless and I am going to get a coil after my termination and make sure to use condoms as well. I don't know why I'm behaving like I'm immune to stds or something.
(Although a big F U to the person saying I need to get "self respect" having sex doesn't mean I don't respect myself and you wouldn't say this to a man so up yours pinkyrose)

Thanks everyone for your advice and I appreciate everyone's honesty and objectivity. I'm 21 but I can be a bit childish at times. Blush

OP posts:
Original poster
Gabby289 · 12/09/2015 14:12

And pinkyrose why would I lie about this. Abortion clinics exist. I went to BPAS branch in Coventry which is next to the station. If you Google BPAS it will say "abortion clinic".
It's common sense that they also offer other services like after care and counselling but it's an abortion clinic

OP posts:
LilacSpunkMonkey · 12/09/2015 14:12

I think the 'self respect' remark was more about you having sex with three different men in such a short time, actually. As in, 'show your body some respect'. I could be wrong but that's how I read it.

And 'up yours'? Really?

You sound like an incredibly immature 21 year old tbh.

HackAttack · 12/09/2015 14:17

Wow, this poor kid seems to have two incredibly unprepared parents who don't even know if they want them.

Aside from the multiple partners with no protection is any part of your life in good shape. Stable income? Living arrangements?

TenForward82 · 12/09/2015 14:24

The self respect remark was about you acting like STIs don't exist.

And no, we're not seeing they terrible comments he made because you haven't told us. We're not mind readers. Not that it's relevant, because you BOTH got yourself into this situation and it's up to you to show maturity for the sake of this child, even if he won't. You do need to grow up, OP.

Original poster
Gabby289 · 12/09/2015 14:27

Right because sleeping with different men in a short space of time is "disrespecting" my body or tarnishing/harming it in some way. Right.

Great how this thread turned into a lecture on my promiscuity and lack of SELF respect. Lol

OP posts:
WhattaMorning · 12/09/2015 14:28

It really doesn't matter how much of an arsehole he is or how many unpleasant comments he makes about women. It doesn't excuse you wanting to create a 'really horrible allegation' what exactly did you mean by this anyway? What was you planning to accuse him of? I sincerely fucking hope it's not either of the two things I'm thinking of!

Original poster
Gabby289 · 12/09/2015 14:28

Okay

OP posts:
WhattaMorning · 12/09/2015 14:32

I think the self respect remark refers to the lack of protection used with each of the three men, not that you had sex with them full stop IYSWIM? At least that's how I read it.

LilacSpunkMonkey · 12/09/2015 14:35

Who mentioned promiscuity? You did.

The rest of us appear to be talking about you not using protection when you slept with people. You could have picked up an STD from any of those guys. And passed it to any of the others. And you wound up pregnant and not knowing who the Father was!

Personally, I don't care how many men you sleep with. That's not the issue. But you behaved irresponsibly (as did they) with regards to your, and their, sexual health and with regards to pregnancy.

Don't try and twist this into people slut shaming you. That's not what's going on here and you know it.

TenForward82 · 12/09/2015 14:37

There is nothing wrong with sleeping with a different guy every day (although why you'd want to let this twat into your vagina, I don't know), as long as you're careful with regards to pregnancy, disease, and personal safety. Anything else is indeed "disrespecting" yourself.

pinkyredrose · 12/09/2015 14:48

No.need to.insult me OP. I don't think you lack self respect because you've sagged several guys. I think you lack self respect because you sagged them all without a condom.

Therefore not knowing who the father is and leaving yourself vulnerable to all kinds of sti's.

Do you understand now?

pinkyredrose · 12/09/2015 14:48

Shagged obviously not sagged.

pinkyredrose · 12/09/2015 14:51

Oh and yes OP I would absolutely say the same to a man who was shagging around without using condoms. You can bet your arse I would.

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