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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

A cautionary tale of gender and pre arrival purchasing....

66 replies

NewBallsPlease00 · 02/09/2015 00:17

.... On my local fb sellers group has this afternoon appeared a whole load of gender specific brand new baby stuff, because the mother was told girl and a boy has arrived...
Sadly she has done the usual pre wash and can't return and won't use pink for a boy but thought I'd share in case anyone else was stock piling too high on specific shades...

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Eminybob · 02/09/2015 09:17

Ok well maybe not my biggest fear.

Fugghetaboutit · 02/09/2015 09:23

no more pink stuff for me, I'm sticking to neutral now

sizethree · 02/09/2015 09:32

Phew! I was thinking that you were maybe focussing a big too heavily on it! (And jealous the you're so relaxed - I worry about everything!)

sepa · 02/09/2015 09:39

I will make sure I wash everything. We aren't finding out the sex so it will all be neutral either way

orangepudding · 02/09/2015 09:53

At 20 weeks I was told I was having a girl. At 26 weeks the sonographer asked if I knew what I was having, I said girl she wasn't sure that was right but baby put hands between legs so couldn't double check. I asked at 30 weeks and was definitely a boy!

Eminybob · 02/09/2015 09:59

God no sizethree I also panicked about everything else! I was signed off work with pregnancy related stress late on. (Not because of my concern over the gender I hasten to add). I didn't really think about what I was typing when I said biggest fear. I should have said one of my many many fears

ArcheryAnnie · 02/09/2015 10:02

I had a load of pink-heavy handmedowns from friend with a girl. I thought I was having a girl, too. Had a boy. Dressed him in the handmedowns anyway (it was nice stuff, and I was poor). His willy didn't fall off, and he's entirely happy in his identity as a boy.

If it happened again, I'd claim that I was basing my parenting on the late 19th century, when pink was for boys, instead of 1950, when pink was for girls.

Sidebar: I found that even when people gave me new stuff, I (secretly) liked the old handmedown stuff better, as - presumably having been washed a lot - it was always much softer!

notaprincessbutaqueen · 02/09/2015 10:54

Are you meant to was new baby clothes? It may be really dumb to ask but this will be my first. I always thought you would just stick the baby in it after taking labels off?

I've never prewashed my baby clothes. I don't prewash my own and i don't prewash my older kid's clothes so why do a babies? I've never had any problems either and I have 3 children.
some women swear by prewashing though, rinising all the nasty chemicals and dirt off first. I sometimes wonder how the previous generations managed..........

AskBasil · 02/09/2015 11:01

My second DC was a girl and I just used her brother's hand-me-downs. Many of them were blue. A few relatives got a few extra pink things for her.

She didn't seem to care what colour I put her in, she puked and possetted on the pink, white and blue clothes at exactly the same rate.

sleepyelectricsheep · 02/09/2015 11:11

"Are you meant to was new baby clothes?"

It's personal preference.

Some are a bit OTT about it. On a MN thread about this, one poster said she'd washed her unborn baby's stuff 4 times! And another described washing newborn clothes before use as "the first act of love for your child"

Personally i've never seen the need. I like clothes feeling new.

Each to their own ...

sizethree · 02/09/2015 11:50

Phew. Glad I'm not the only one with many many fears!
We've gone for white nursery and white new born clothes. I hope not knowing the sex will help me push harder as I'll be impatient.

WannabeLaraCroft · 02/09/2015 11:53

Oh no, I'm starting to panic now. I have a 5yo DS and currently 7 months pregnant with a girl (so I've been told). To make space, we got rid of all of DS's boys clothes (kept all the neutral stuff of which there was loads so very handy). I have picked up a few girly things in the sales recently, some dresses, romper suits, t-shirts etc for next summer when she's a few months old. If I end up having a boy it won't be too bad as I have a lot of neutral stuff, but I'd have to march back to the charity shop and buy all of DS's stuff back!

PlaysWellWithOthers · 02/09/2015 11:58

Babies don't give a toss what colour clothes they're put in. As long as they're warm, fed and loved, babies aren't all that fussy about fashion statements. Rest assured however, that putting a boy in pink doesn't make his penis fall off, nor does putting a girl in blue make her grow a penis.

If any of you had seen the amount of dust and shit in the warehouses of even the most upmarket shops, you'd wash every single item you bought. Unless you have a thing about dressing in cockroach shit of course....

AskBasil · 02/09/2015 12:22

Oh God I'd never even thought of washing new clothes before I ever wore them.

Feeling slightly horrified about that now.

Skiptonlass · 02/09/2015 12:28

Not that long ago, pink was actually associated with boys....

jezebel.com/5790638/the-history-of-pink-for-girls-blue-for-boys

Mildly disheartening that people put little girls in frothy pink shite from day one. Get that gender stereotyping in early, eh? The worst thing I've seen so far is a pink and silver babygro with 'future footballer's wife' written on it. I suppressed the urge to burn it in the shop in a fit of pique.

We are having a boy (unless our scans were wrong) but there's nothing in the cache of baby clothes I wouldn't put a girl or a boy in. It's sad we divide them by gender so early :(

sepa · 02/09/2015 12:30

I eat in McDonald's and the like so I'm sure I can get over that my clothes would have come into contact with some kind of poop.

Can you tumble dry baby clothes?

frazzledbutcalm · 02/09/2015 12:32

A friend of mine had problems with her 2nd pregnancy. She had many detailed scans where they had to measure the baby's internal organs etc each time. There was no doubt as to the sex as each scan was VERY detailed and intricate. She had a boy already and was told by different consultants that this baby was also a boy. She was very happy, all she wanted was a healthy baby - having another boy meant she could use all his old things.

She went through labour and delivered a GIRL!! Her husband was frantic and kept telling the midwife that his sons willy was missing! The midwife kept saying no, you have a girl, a daughter... He didn't hear/process this, he just 'knew' his son's willy was missing! It took a few minutes before he calmed and realised he had a daughter. My friend was just pleased she was awake for the birth (not emergency c-section with GA) because she said she would have woken up and thought the baby had been switched/mistaken for another baby, as there really was no doubt according to all the consultants.

Just shows how wrong they can be. They're only human after all.

Iamnotloobrushphobic · 02/09/2015 12:35

We have been told we are having a boy and we do have some blue 'boy clothes' but the nursery and furniture is neutral, the pram and car seat is neutral, most of the clothes are neutral and I would use the blue clothes and blankets regardless.

I have washed all of my baby clothes because my first two babies had terrible eczema and they still have very sensitive skin now that they are much older. I work on the basis that washing the clothes certainly won't do any harm but might be better for baby's skin than leaving the clothes with a residue of factory shit and chemicals.

Lightbulbon · 02/09/2015 12:41

I've ended up with pink stuff for DS because of other people giving away unwanted things that were 'the wrong' gender.

Doesn't bother me!

goawayalready · 02/09/2015 16:43

my first was a surprise so i got neutral stuff but i also had some boy stuff that did fine as neutral (i had a girl)

my other two were boys and i found out for them i got it confirmed at every scan i had loads of scans! just making sure as a friend of mine was told number five was a girl (she had four boys already) he was a boy she has had a couple more and they are boys too i think she will keep going till she gets a girl!

ArcheryAnnie · 02/09/2015 18:49

All clothes are neutral clothes to a baby.

Want2bSupermum · 02/09/2015 19:28

When I went for the scan for DS they knew his sex from blood work done at 12 weeks. They extract the baby's DNA and search for issues that way due to my family history. They don't tell you the sex until you go for the scan at 18 weeks though.

Also, the sonographer put a picture of my sons willy on the 52" screen and coloured it in blue. It was rather disturbing but the lady was rather American and excited on my behalf. She then told me she had checked my blood work and was 100% sure I was having a boy due to the DNA work.

My son work pink stuff from DD and my DD wore boys hand me downs. It really does not matter.

sexybeast · 02/09/2015 19:32

That happened to me too! DS1 spent his first few days in pink babygros. At least I didn't have to make him wear the vile lacy dress with Bo Peep lace bonnet that my MIL had bought for him (couldn't even shift it on Ebay). Didn't bother finding out for my second...

sexybeast · 02/09/2015 19:37

The weird thing was that people had told me how great it was that I was having a girl, how having a girl first was best etc etc then they had to eat their words as I presented them with my enormous son! (Secretly I'd really wanted a boy and was scared of having a girl due to my own mother/daughter relationship so I felt very relieved).

spiderlight · 02/09/2015 19:39

There was no chance of a mistake with DS - the first image on the screen at the 20-week scan looked like something a fourteen-year-old boy would draw on a bus shelter. The sonographer was in hysterics - I asked her if it was what I thought it was and she said 'Oh, thank goodness you wanted to know!'

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