Oh what have I done? Hand holding needed please

[Donnakim]

After TTC for the past year, I am now pregnant with our first DC. I'm only at 6 weeks and suffering with crippling nausea. When it hits I cannot do anything but lie down and wait for it to pass. This week, we were meant to be going away on holiday with friends but decided a while back not to go in case we did succeed in getting pregnant. I've spent most of the week either in bed or on the sofa. DH had planned for us to go and do all sorts of lovely things and I couldn't do any of them. He has been great about it all, but I keep worrying he is going to get fed up with me. He has gone out now to cancel tomorrow's dinner plans with friends which we only made a few hours ago.

Tomorrow I should be back to work. I have cancelled a meeting away as I'm terrified of a) the travel and b) getting through the two days. I have just thrown a lovely roast dinner in the bin, barely touched, and haven't eaten a proper meal in a week. DH went out and bought the ingredients this morning especially for me as that was what I wanted. He's now put in some baked potatoes but I doubt I will be able to eat them, but I have to eat something.

WTAF am I supposed to do?! I can't go on like this, have I made a mistake? I'm sat her wearing stupid seabands which have just given me sore wrists, drinking ginger beer which is giving my IBS a run for its money and crying. Was I stupid getting pregnant at 32, am I too old and my body is telling me it can't do this?

Sorry for the rant but I have no idea what to do

Yay! Congrats on the pregnancy! Get some tuc biscuits to nibble on and some lucozade. Got me through the early weeks. Cold facecloths also a godsend. Don't worry, it does pass, and 32 isn't that old. I had twins at 34. :)

You aren't too old but your body is having a shock. Hormones are raging, blood is pumping so be kind to yourself. Try and snack - little and often helped me both pregnancies. If my stomach was empty I felt really awful. Acupuncture also really helped me. Trying not to panic. The first few weeks are the hardest.

AND breathe..... Ok.... everyone has the 'oh fuck! oh fuck! oh fuck!' moment. I also went through stages where i thought my BF was going to leave me because I was so useless at life (tired, sick, grumpy, teary), I also couldn't eat most of the AMAZING food he cooked. I also had migraines every weekend for weeks 6-14 of pregnancy that knocked me out totally for 18-24 hours. GRIM! I was lucky as I wasn't too sick.

Anyway.... there is light at the end of the tunnel, it WILL get better. If you are being really sick, go and see the doctor and he might be able to give you some anti-nausea tablets that are safe to take. There maybe someone here who had bad MS or HG who might be able to give you practical advice.

Right now you are hormone soup...... I found weeks 6-9 the worse and then I had the odd good day. Now 27 weeks and doing pretty good.

Good luck! you are not alone

Your not too old ! I had dd2 at 34 and planning another one this year!

It won't last for ever.

The amazing beautiful baby will be worth it

I absolutly feel your pain. I went to Mexico in your state and ruined DP holiday as I couldn't leave the room.

Thank you ladies, that really has helped. Now I know I'm not just being pathetic.

I think I've read every book under the sun while TTC but nothing prepares you for the reality of it....

I will give my GP a call in the morning and see what they can do to help me before I get back to the office on Friday.

Congratulations, as others have said 32 is not too old at all and what you are feeling is completely normal.
Try to eat little of often, even if it's a piece of toast, a ginger biscuit or something like belitiva's, all these helped me through the first stages.

Sounds like you have a lovely supportive DH who understands what you are going through so even if you can't go out and do all the things you planned I'm sure he will appreciate just a simple hug and thank you for being there.

OP, to be blunt, if you've got crippling nausea eating biscuits and crackers are very unlikely to help.

With my first DC I had mild nausea but second time round I was totally floored. I spent two months vomiting at the drop of the hat, unable to eat or do any of the basic household chores. It was one of the most hideous and upsetting times of my life.

In the end I went to my GP and he prescribed me an anti emetic which worked brilliantly in that I still felt mildly sick but at least could lead a normal life again. The sickness disappeared at exactly 13 weeks.

Please don't suffer. Unless you've got hideous morning sickness it's hard to appreciate just how bad it is. If it had been my first pregnancy I wouldn't have had any more children, it was that bd.

Congrats! Weeks 6-9 were horrible for me and rich food was in no way what I wanted or could tolerate. I lived off crisps, sweets and lemonade, maybe the odd sandwich and apple. The nausea eased off after that and the 2nd trimester was a whole bunch easier!

Re DH, just try and keep the communication going. It's (presumably) all new to both of you. It's really not forever!

Oh, and I'm 34 and nearly 35 weeks - I may be sleeping around 10 hours a day now (on mat leave) and struggle to lever myself off the sofa, but it's still totally doable :)

I second the vote for the GP and anti emetics. I had hyperemesis with my first, vomiting countless times a day for the first 20 weeks, but pills took the edge off a bit. There were definitely times when I wondered how I was going to make it through another day. I spent Christmas and my anniversary lying on the sofa with a sick bowl and was signed off work for over two months. Second time around I was bracing myself for the worst, but just had 'normal' morning sickness, I've never been so relieved!

So sorry you're going through this, you have my sympathy. People who haven't experienced it or been close to someone who has honestly have no idea how bad it can be. Oh and don't worry about not being able to eat - the baby will take what it needs. My first was a whopper at over 10lbs despite me barely eating for the first half of the pregancy. I found lemony smells and strong mints helped a little, although nothing really worked.

Oh my goodness mine are now teens but I remember the sickness more than anything. People do try to trivialise it (Morning sickness? Yeah, and the rest) but it poleaxed me.

Do try not to become dehydrated. That is really really important.

Smells also set me off. It was like every sense was turned up to full capacity. Even my usual clothes detergent turned my stomach.

Although strangely some smells and sights helped. I had a bit of a thing about fresh lemons for a while.

All I can say is rest as much as you can, being overtired is also a trigger. Be kind to yourself. See the doctor if it gets too bad.

I still can't bear the smell of roasted garlic after 14 years
You do have to try and eat even though you don't really want to, as you'll feel a bit better afterwards. Keep it bland too
Rest as much as you can.
Just try keep your eyes on the prize.

Don't worry, I am only a couple of weeks ahead of you and also feeling like death. See your GP asap, I have just been prescribed cyclizine which stops you feeling so sick. It has helped a bit, but I am terrified too and my pregnancy was also planned! Plus I am 36 .

I had my baby last year and the nausea was crippling. I was so unwell. Eat what you can, when you can and do your best to get some fluids in you. I was rubbish at being pregnant, having a newborn was a breeze in comparison!

Don't let your self get hungry. Eat something even if it's small. Blood sugar dip can make morning sickness worse. I had it terribly with 2 of my pregnancys I couldn't keep my medication down so ended up with anti sickness tablets. If it gets too much ask for some help from gp

Pregnancy Sickness Support

Read this website and go and see your GP. You can get antisickness medication, although some GPs are reluctant to prescribe it.

The important thing is to stay hydrated- I found that letting an ice cube melt in my mouth helped a little when I was very sick and nauseous.

Its sounds like u have hyperemesis. Make an appt for the gp who will be able to give u something to help. 32 isn't old. I'm 36 in Aug and expecting dc2. Be prepared to be unwell until around 13 weeks and maybe a bit by this. Take some time off work and enjoy being pampered. Dh will be fine xx

Congratulations on your pregnancy and in your post you sounded just like me!

I'm 17 weeks preg with our first, I spent a year TTC and dreaming about pregnancy and having a baby. When it happened it knocked me backwards! I had terrible sickness, no energy, curled up on the sofa or in bed all day and started missing work deadlines. I cried all the time and wondered if I could do it.
It is an awkward time because you might not want to share the news yet, we didnt tell until we had our scan. Before then we canceled everything- even a good friends wedding!

I found a fizzy drink really helped settle my tummy and kept the nausea at bay, I settled on lime cordial and soda water, I sipped it with ice cubes throughout the day and it was a good send. Ginger didnt work for me it gave me indigestion, but mints were brilliant. A polo in my mouth through most of the day helped withe the sickness too.

Keep at it! You are doing wonderful so far, and when you get a bit further along and you feel baby wriggling away in there its all worth it!
xx

Rest up and try not to worry about the sickness, I threw up in the bin under my desk at work at 6 weeks. And on the train. And a bus. It's ghastly, isn't it? But not an indication of your or the babys health and hopefully you should start feeling better around 12 weeks. It's also around 12 weeks and once I'd had the first scan that I stopped freaking out at the enormity of being pregnant and relaxed in to it. I think how you're feeling is totally normally. Please see your GP though, as they can help with the sickness if it's totally flooring you.

I was 37 when my first child was born and 39 when my twins were born. You and your body are really are not too old. When you have 'geriatric' added to your notes at 39, then you can feel ancient!

Massive congratulations!

Congrats I'm 32 weeks pregnant and I've finally stopped throwing up morning noon and night. I was like you when it started at 6 weeks and although it feels like the worst thing ever, I know it really is, you will come out of the other side and before you know it you'll be on count down. I totally know where your coming from, it really is horrendous. XXXX

Unkind and unnecessary notyourordinarymum.

It does very much sound like the OP may have hyperemisis. I've had it twice, for 18 werks, it is truly ghastly, the grimest, bleakest periods of my life, and particularly frightening in my first pregnancy.

Aw, I really feel for you.

I'm 26 weeks and had sickness from weeks 6-18 and it was unbearable. I couldn't eat or sleep and had to take time off work as I just couldn't cope. I was throwing up at really inappropriate/inconvenient times, exhausted due to lack of sleep, and just kept crying.

My gp signed me off work and prescribed me some anti sickness tablets. I tried to nibble at plain foods and found that I managed salty food best - ritz crackers, ready salted crisps, toast & marmite. I tried to sip at water or fruit juice.

I lost a load of weight and still weigh less now at 25 weeks than pre-pregnancy. I was so worried that the baby would suffer from lack of nutrients etc.

I also worried that my husband would get fed up but he read up on it all and it really helped him to be understanding and supportive.

Be kind to yourself, don't put pressure on yourself and take any help on offer. And don't feel bad if you need to take a couple of weeks off work.

Sparkling water helped with mine. Hope it goes soon

It will pass, this won't last forever. You are certainly not too old and you will get through this.

I had terrible sickness and lost lots of weight, but my ds managed to get everything he needed, so try not to worry.

Take a vitamin supplement, I didn't always keep it down but made me feel better knowing that I sometimes did.

I used to carry two carrier bags with me wherever I went. One to throw up in and one full of Ritz crackers and slices of bread. I tried to nibble something every 30 mins. It sounds extreme but it really helped.

It is horrible and hard for people to sympathise and understand if they haven't experienced.

Keep positive and hope that each day will become a little easier. You'll get there

Keep a box of crackers on your bed side table and nibble one BEFORE you get out of bed in the morning. That's probably my best tip. Good luck, OP.