Could I be pregnant ?

[Riri17]

Hiya I am 17 years old, I'll be 18 in July! I am working in a care home for elderly at the minute and live at home with my parents! I had unprotected sex with my boyfriend last night and let him come in me because we actually would like to have a baby he is 19 and got his own place so if I am pregnant I can always move in as there will be more room there for me and baby! I just wanted some advice and also wanted to know what the chances on being pregnant are as I am also expecting a period April 3rd so it would of been in my ovulation period I hope I am pregnant because of my job I matured very quickly I have been out drinking with mates done all that and am ready to settle down and have my own little family! Any advice would be appreciated Thankyou x

You definitely could be pregnant. But I wouldn't recommend it. I had my first (and currently only) child at 28 and its a massive culture shock. I miss my freedom and the ability to just go out and be responsibility free, and I bad 13 years of going out drinking and spending my money how I wanted etc. I also think at 17 you're unlikely to have been able to experience everything open to you- education, different boyfriends etc. I know people do find their life partner at your age but I think its unusual.

I love my DD with all my heart and wouldn't swap my life now for anything, but I'm glad I waited until I was the age I was. Go and get thee morning after pill and wait a few years.

I know what you mean it will be a huge step In life and change it compeletly but I'm not a going out person I am very homely got a big family that I know will support me also and I know he is the one for me from when I first met him I knew he was I know what you mean though and thanks for the advice but I couldn't go get morning after pill after actually trying for a baby if I am I am and if I'm not then I'll go back on contraception x

Agree with gemerama. No rush. Not sure why you've come on for advice op as you've obviously made up your mind. Personally though, I think this is w seriously stupid idea.

The fact that you need to ask if you could be pregnant after having unprotected sex shows your knowledge of the world, babies are not accessories and are not easy I would really think about what you are doing

I'm sure you think you're very mature, but surely the more mature thing would be to try living with your boyfriend and see if you actually get along as co-habitants? Rather than doing it under the stress of pregnancy and newborn days, which believe me puts the most solid, established, mature relationship under a serious amount of strain.

You sound incredibly naive about what is involved with parenting and raising a child. Have you started taking folic acid? Can you provide for a baby? Has your boyfriend offered a commitment to you and any future child that would outlast anything that might happen in your relationship?

Yes, you've had unprotected sex, you could fall pregnant (it wouldn't happen for several days). If it doesn't happen, please please sit down and have a rational discussion with your boyfriend about budgeting, living together, your career plans, his career plans, who would be a stay at home parent, how you believe you want to raise any children, what your commitment to each other will be, what you would do if you had pregnancy complications.

It is, honestly, what mature planned parenting is all about.

You just sound like you did it on a whim. You could be paying for that for a long time.

I would try living with your boyfriend before getting pregnant then moving in.

Things change in a relationship once you live together and have a home to run too.

I don't really appreciate negative comments on this, I was actually for a bit of advice not for people to think I'm be naive to this situation I know the responsibilities I have for the future if I am! and also I know that babies arnt accessories I want a baby so if I am pregnant then I know I will be happy but if I'm not I will wait for a few years but thanks for advice i will speak to my boyfriend about moving in and that! I'm not saying there is a rush to have a baby but I am ready for a baby my mental state financial etc .. I know I might sound crazy but I'm not bothered about travelling the world I have the rest of my life to do that with my children I know I was born to be a mother to my own and have a family I'm not a party animal wanna go out every weekend and get drunk got on holiday all the time yes I know it's also freedom I won't be able to have freedom anymore but I'm not bothered about that I want to have my own children and make them happy and have a childhood I never had!

I don't thing anyone was being intentionally negative, they were just being real.

Hindsight is a wonderful thing and I remember thinking how I knew everything at 17 but I really didn't! I'm so glad I waited until I had kissed a few frogs (that I once proclaimed to love dearly but weren't right for me) found the person I want to spend the rest of my life with, a career and to be financially secure before I started a family. I would also like to point out that all my friends who had kids when they were around 17/18 did not end up staying with the father, I'm not saying that will be the case for you but statistically, that's how it is.

You came on here looking for advice which people have given you but it sounds like your mind is set so I wish you luck.

I found out I was pregnant with DS the day after my 18th birthday. I thought I knew everything. Me and XH had been together for 2 years, lived together, both had jobs. He was 10 years older than me. Said it would be fine.

The next 5/6 years were the hardest of my life. We had split up by the time DS was 18 months as he found it all too hard (he was nearly 30 ffs) financially, emotionally, practically he is an absolute shit. Had years of grief from him. My whole life changed, he was still out on the piss 5/6 nights a week, expecting me to cook/clean/take care of DS while working full time, spending all out money on shit etc. I had to go back to work full time when DS was 12 weeks old, I had PND and a traumatic birth. DS didn't sleep through the night til 2.5 and was a high needs child! (Still is)

Now DS is 7.5 I'm engaged and pregnant with DC2 and I've just bought my first house.

So it did all work out.

But the stress and the sheer hard graft and having no one to have my back or support me in any way nearly killed me, honestly it shouldn't be that hard, I love DS more than anything but I'm so
Sad and feel so guilty about his early years. They shouldn't have been like that.

Wait until you at financially settled independently, and ideally until you and your DP have been through hard/rocky times so you can see how you cope together.

I had a 'proper' boyfriend at 17/18 and felt very similarly about life then as you do now. It sure didn't last long into my late teens/twenties.

Now having my first baby at 33 in a very happy and financially secure marriage having enjoyed the social life, career opportunities and travel life brought along in my twenties. Thank Christ I never 'settled' with that first boyfriend - no idea what happened to him!

Purposing getting pregnant at 17 is beyond stupid.

Well I will let you all know what happens I appreciate all of your advice! Thanks for sharing your stories with me aswell I understand I'm young but I don't feel it haha

Just out of curiosity what work do you do at seventeen that has made you financially ready for a child?

I am a Carer I could be on up to 11 pound an hour

Financial preparedness isn't about income! It's about budgeting, saving, planning, future income prospects, planning for maternity leave, childcare, expenses etc.

Why not try saving hard for six months so you would have some resources for the stuff you need when a baby comes along. What have you really got to lose by waiting a bit, and planning, and saving money. Why the rush?

Do you remember being, say, 13, and thinking you were incredibly mature and knew lots? The reason you're getting these responses is that many of us know we felt the same way at 17, but still had a whole lot of learning, maturing, and living to do. I changed massively in my 20s and I was a very mature and capable 18 year old.

You may well make a good mother at 18. But I guarantee you'd make a better mother at 20, or 25.

I love my son who I gave birth to at 18 with no man or income and I would never change him but I'd be lying if I said I wish I had done things differently! Thankfully now I am in a new secure relationship and very financially secure but it has not been easy and working from 8.00-6.30 6 days a week when you have a baby to look after is possibly one of the hardest things I think a woman can do. No body is trying to be nasty we just want to give you the best advice possible, the advice we perhaps didn't listen to :)

I don't think getting pregnant at 17 is any more stupid than say 40. Neither are ideal necessarily for different reasons but I'd depends really.
One women I work with in the hospital is studying to be an occupational therapist. She has a 10 year old. She is 28 and just starting her career now her children are older. I don't think having kids young and having a career later is such a bad thing.

Christ alive. I had a baby when I was 18 and then went on to qualify as a solicitor. It doesn't mean your life is over. OP yes of course you could be pregnant, wait until your period is due and do a test.

I hope you get the result you are hoping for.

I'm pleased I did it the way I did. Yes it's difficult but all my friends who are now mid-late 30s struggle now so at least I was young enough to cope with being knackered. I don't regret a single thing and some of the comments on here are ridiculous.

Bloody hell OP you can't even afford go house yourself, let alone look after a baby. I would def move in with your Bf now so you can get to know eachother better- you might hate eachother!

I'm sure if you're mature enough to get pregnant you're mature enough to work out your ovulation, use a fertility monitor and so on (although I should warn you after tax you're going to have to work about 4 hours to be able to afford a clearblue monitor, which just goes to show how expensive things are ) but it's not just about you- if you have time and space to plan do
It properly. Your baby will be far better off if you're on your way to a good job, can provide housing and are secure in a relationship.

No, being a teen mum isn't the end of the world but I look back and shudder imagining the type of 25 year old mother i would've been, let alone 18.

I don't think being able to use a fertility monitor demonstrates maturity or ability to be a good mother. Most 18 year olds would have no need for one!
You do have to think rationally about your situation and how you want your life to turn out op...
Given your current job have you considered nursing?

I think the poster said it best that we remember thinking we knew it all at 18. But we didn't. And we've watched friends who've had babies at that age struggle. That's why we are saying this.