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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Your experiences of 'Baby on Board' badges

119 replies

Cherryblossom200 · 26/09/2014 16:34

Hi everyone,

I'm interested in hearing your experiences of wearing a baby on board badge? I've got a badge but haven't worn it yet, I'm just over 20 weeks now and have a rather large bump now so I don't feel comfortable being squished on the tube at rush hour. I've resisted wearing the badge up until now because I don't like drawing attention to myself but I think it's time I put my badge on now!

I'm finding that when people see my bump who are sitting in the designated seats for pregnant/elderly people they tend to ignore me but other people always offer their seat

Cherry x

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MrsLilac · 27/09/2014 18:41

Hmmm this is interesting. I'm 30 weeks with a very obvious bump and I have been moaning for months that no one ever offers me a seat. I have been offered a seat about 5 times total. I haven't worn a badge though so maybe I should. I got given one today actually so it might be time to man up. People are so rude though. I fainted the other day on the tube. I woke up in the aisle and still no one gave me a seat! Eventually a lady did and when I looked up, she was pregnant herself! I felt awful! She was wearing a badge though!

kirsten123 · 27/09/2014 18:42

Mamushka - could your passive-aggressive friend not have just ASKED for you?!

I'm a tad worried how nervous a lot of people are about speaking to fellow humans on the tube - are you sure you will have the balls to stand up for the child when it's born?!

eurochick · 27/09/2014 18:43

I found it really useful, not just to get a seat if I felt like I needed one, but I also found I got a bit less squashed and jostled with one. In a crowd people might not notice a bump, but would see the badge as it's closer to eye level. So I wore mine a lot but turned down (with thanks) many of the seats offered. At other times I did gratefully sink into the offered seat!

silverine · 27/09/2014 18:47

17 weeks now and worn mine since 12 week scan as I felt really tired...
I found though, unless there is a seat already free, more often noone will offer a seat than the times they will... The fact my bump's not massive doesn't mean I don't need a seat.

HappyAgainOneDay · 27/09/2014 19:14

Unrelated to the thread but I don't live anywhere near London and know that the fares are based on the zone you are travelling to. If I arrive from here at a London station, how do I know which zone I need to buy an underground ticket for?

Original poster

Cherryblossom200 · 27/09/2014 19:37

Hey happy again, you are best of buying a travel card as tends to work out cheaper. That way covers you for zones 1-4

OP posts:

WillowWoods · 27/09/2014 19:41

Me on board,should suffice,and confuse.

FromagePlease · 27/09/2014 19:48

Very useful.

I wore mine from 16 weeks or so. I found that people would mostly let me on the tube first so I had first dibs on any seats, I was also given a little more room in the crush, and it would help others understand if I was walking more slowly in the rush.

I was usually given a seat without any issue. My bump was quite small and it was winter so the badge was particularly useful for me. I truly believe that in the majority of cases people just aren't looking, rather than deliberately not offering. I only had 4 or 5 instances of this and commuted by tube twice a day for most of my pregnancy.

I don't have a problem with asking for a seat if you genuinely need it (wether pregnancy related or not) At worst people will say no, or explain that they need it themselves.

hesterton · 27/09/2014 19:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bluestocking · 27/09/2014 19:58

I think they're great! I remember coming into London for meetings a couple of times in early pregnancy and feeling really weird on the tube, but there being no way anyone would have offered my seat as I was not visibly pregnant at all.
Like Hesterton, I was thrilled to be able to get up in a motherly way for a woman wearing her badge. She had no visible sign of pregnancy except that slightly green-around-the-gills look that those of us who've been pregnant recognise, and she was clearly far more in need of a seat than me.

BlotOnTheLandscape · 27/09/2014 20:26

There is no way I'd wear one, just not me! Then again, I hate the t-shirts proclaiming pregnancy as well.

Stillwishihadabs · 28/09/2014 09:43

I love them (not pregnant btw and when I was they hadn't been invented) it saves so much ambiguity. If I am on the tube with someone wearing one I will very loudly proclaim "can someone give this lady a seat please?". I didn't hesitate to ask healthy looking young men for a seat in late pregnancy, just a simple " excuse me, do you mind if I sit down?" But I am a born and bred Londoner and tube/ bus etiquette has been drummed into me from a very young age. Another example which people don't seem to know is, busy tube a child under 8 should sit on their carer's lap to free the other seat, anyone older than 8 can stand.

SeaSaltMill · 28/09/2014 11:16

I have one, I take a train, tube and DLR so there's lots of changing and people tend to barge into you. I was on the overground once and was pointedly ignored so they don't always work, luckily I was feeling ok so didn't need a seat but I have had funny turns on trains before and really appreciate a seat.

KMartin01 · 28/09/2014 13:53

I'm 30 weeks, definitely look pregnant and commute into London every day. I wouldn't dream of wearing the badge. I have a voice and will ask for a seat if and when I need one. I haven't felt the need to sit down on every journey as I feel fit & well.

DecaffTastesWeird · 28/09/2014 15:38

Mamushka I would be a bit careful when making assumptions about perfect strangers tbh. A colleague of mine is disabled. To stand up for long periods of time is extremely painful for her and has resulted in her being taken away by ambulance and hospitalised in the past. She has encountered numerous people such as your friend on the tube who have assumed she is not in need of a seat and made loud comments to embarrass her.

The badges are great and not at all embarrassing to wear but they aren't super noticeable... Sometimes you do have to ask someone because noone has noticed.

BeansMrSeanAndHeinz · 28/09/2014 16:52

I hung mine up 6 weeks ago when I started mat leave - it was really good for tricky early stages but even when I was massive a lady stopped me to say how helpful it was as it removed all doubt that I was pregnant.

I did get used to asking in the end, with the nicest smile I could manage and a "you're ever so kind" and one overcrowded day a commuter rounded up enough people to make a sort of honour guard for me so I could get on first and then shouted down the carriage for someone to give me a seat - people are generally kind (on the central line it was young guys in suits and boisterous builders in particular) but it can be hard to get them to look up from candy crush.

Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy and commute!

EvilRingahBitch · 28/09/2014 16:58

I had my babies in the days before little badges, (otherwise I would totally have worn them) so had to resort to blatantly PA body language in orde to get a seat. On the couple of occasions when I needed to ask for a seat I addressed myself to a bank of four likely looking candidates and said "could someone please give me a seat". Saves the risk of singling out a particular person who really does need the seat themselves. A young suit-wearing male colleague of mine with a full set of limbs has Muscular Dystrophy, so I'm alert to the fact that not everyone who looks able to stand is, but it doesn't need to be anything so drastic - that healthy looking woman could have a nasty cold, or an IBS attack, or be miscarrying or just be wearing a disastrously uncomfortable pair of shoes for the first time. That pinstriped bloke in his forties could have gout.

bumbleandbumble · 28/09/2014 17:01

I never had one. I never felt the need... I never felt the need to sit except in the very last stages when it was beyond obvious that I was pregnant...

why do you need to sit when you are 4 months pregnant? It seemed strange to me.

(but maybe I was just extremely lucky with 3 easy pregnancies?)

flipflopsonfifthavenue · 28/09/2014 19:22

I had one for first pregnancy but didn't wear it til about 5/6 months as I felt fine, and I also didn't like drawing attention to myself.
Having said that, what I hate even more is when noone gives me a seat, and other people standing look at me with pity and start looking around and I KNOW they're about to kick someone out of their seat for me, which I KNOW is kind of them but it mortifies me....

With first pregnancy I often used to walk through the tube doors and people would fall over themselves offering me a seat. I rarely had to stand. This pregnancy, am lucky if I get a seat. I think its because I start work earlier now so am on the tube by 7:15am and its a different sort of commuter at this time - head down/fast asleep/totally ignoring everyone around them. Am 34 weeks pregnant and have been clearly pregnant for some time, so don't wear a badge, but people still ignore me. I know of people who wear their badge ON their tummy and other people's eye level :)

rocketjam · 28/09/2014 19:31

Bumble, it's not strange at all. I though everyone knew that many women struggle in early pregnancy. I had low blood pressure, I often felt dizzy and sick, many women have backaches from early pregnancy, feel a lot more tired than usual. I had a badge on my backpack so that people seeing me from the back could see that I was pregnant, however I never expected people to give me a seat, just to not push me about too much on very busy trains.

smogsville · 28/09/2014 19:32

Does anyone else just ask?! Politely I mean. Or is it just me? I always choose a suitable candidate (young men generally) and just say excuse you would you mind if I sat down as I'm pregnant. They seem to fall over themselves to get up. This is especially useful at the early stage (pre 12 week scan) when I don't like wearing my badge as convinced I'm going to bump into a work colleague before I've told my boss. We're one stop from the end of the line so it's not unusual to see a colleague which would be v awkward. I get v tired in early preg and have a long commute (albeit only two days a week) so feel no compunction about asking, politely, for a seat.

middlings · 28/09/2014 19:50

bumble I'm weirdly happy for you that it seems strange to you, but having either boarded a standing room only train at 6.55 in the morning and/or a standing room only train at 7pm (or 5pm when I had to leave to pick up DD1), I was very grateful for a seat. Better than having to sit on the floor if I felt like I was going to pass out or throw up.

They're great OP. I keep my eye out for them

Original poster

Cherryblossom200 · 28/09/2014 20:11

Bumble wow I don't ever ask for a seat I get offered them, but when the tube is packed which most of the time it is and as I live on the way to heathrow I also have to contend with a carriage full of suitcases. It's dangerous to stand as I get shoved around and I'm petite so when it's crowded people can't see my bump.

OP posts:

AndIFeedEmGunpowder · 28/09/2014 20:14

I'm the opposite to you Bumble.

At the very end (when I'm the size of a house and everyone offers!) I have loads of energy and feel brilliant, but 3/4 months in I feel dizzy and have to concentrate really hard to not puke on other commuters shoes, that's when the badge is really helpful.

Suppose we are all different!

AndIFeedEmGunpowder · 28/09/2014 20:15

middlings I've sat on the floor too!

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