19 weeks pregnant and quitting smoking

[magneticfield55]

Please don't pile on. I hate myself.

This is my first pregnancy. I was a 20 a day smoker beforehand. I went down to 5 or so and am now down to 2, some days none. I have bipolar disorder and have been suffering from depression and am under the perinatal mental health team. My depression is getting worse. I have tried to stop smoking alone but realised I need help so when I see my midwife (I see a specialist MH one) tomorrow I am asking for a referral to the smoking cessation service. I don't want NRT, I want to stop cold turkey. It's the way to go. I need account ability and support, I have been so ashamed of myself I have lied and told people I quit. I am having panic attacks about what damage I may have caused. I want this baby but have had such a hard time accepting I'm pregnant and feeling it's doomed.

At 19 weeks if I stop now, it isn't too late is it? I don't have a scan until 22 weeks. I am so scared and fear makes smoking worse. But it's ridiculous because smoking has been the biggest source of stress. I have felt like everything has been out of control.

I'm not looking for endorsement. I'm not excusing myself. I hate myself and wish I could start all over again.

That's fantastic magnetic! Amazing progress and all down to you with no help from those who should have been there to support you. You're an inspiration!

Oh well done magnetic! I just started reading your thread and was going to pop on and say lots of positive things like "You can do it!"
You are brilliant. I found that it got easier every day.

Thank you! Bumping again for anyone who needs support.

I did have a relapse last week and smoked 4 in a day in a panic. Not since though and felt shite about it. I'm seeing the midwife this week and giving them a bollocking. They did eventually refer me (again-the first referral didn't go through) to the smoking cessation midwife who called me once weeks ago to ask if I'd prefer group or home and then I never heard from them again. Likewise I was allegedly referred to therapy for anxiety by MW which is supposedly fast tracked but that was 8 weeks ago and nowt since. And these are the allegedly amazing Briarley midwives of King's!

Anyway that rant aside and the fag slip I'm still off them. I've been reading Never Take Another Puff by Joel Spitzer when I start mentally romanticising them. It's very good, similar to Allen Carr and completely free!

I just wanted to say a massive well done magnetic !! I'm so impressed with how you've dealt with everything - and on your own! Please do give your MW a hard time - it's absolutely unacceptable that you've been so badly let down. You should push for the therapy you deserve (of course, you shouldn't have to). I quit 8 years ago, thanks to Allan Carr, after over 10 years of a serious 20 a day addiction. Looking back now, it's hard to believe I used to put myself through it. One of the things that really motivated me was the money I was giving to these evil corporations who profit from making us so sick - I'm so glad I'm able to spend my money on nicer things for me and my family now :)

Best of luck with the rest of your pregnancy. You're doing everything to give your little girl the best start in life, what a great thing to do.

Well done. You've really worked hard and I admire your will power.

Thank you :) and it's a little boy, the sonographer was wrong! I've grown a penis :D

Hello, it's magnetic though I NC. I have had a bit of a relapse and have been smoking again in the past week- not every day but most days. Coincided with a relapse in my mental health- I am having terrible insomnia and I am beginning to go loopy because of it and struggling to not sleep and also work full time. I had to take a few days off work last week as I was in such a state.

I'm determined to get back on the wagon so not smoking today. I'm wondering whether to bother asking my midwife for help as they never get back to me. She was pretty pissed off at the stop smoking midwife, but because I'd quit (and I feel shit as she and my perinatal psychiatrist were full of praise for me) she hasn't chased it up any further.

Just posted for a bit of support and a kick up the hole really :(

Hey BigCat, sorry to hear you've been having a rough time. Do not feel shit about this - You have been massively let down, it's their fault not yours. I feel so angry on your behalf Do you realise you have now, as a PG woman, been waiting over 10 weeks for a stop smoking appt.? You could probably sue them! Do you have anybody close to you who could help you kick up a stink? If you have the energy then yes, absolutely bother the mw and make sure she chases up your therapy as well. That's probably more important and the two issues tend to go hand in hand anyway.

Meanwhile, have you thought any more about NRT?

From NHS:

Pregnancy
Most pregnant women can use NRT, but it's important to get advice from your GP or midwife first. If you can’t quit smoking on your own, they can help you assess the risks of continuing to smoke against the benefits of quitting with the help of NRT.

Using NRT is safer than smoking because it doesn't contain poisons like tar or carbon monoxide.

Your healthcare professional can advise you about NRT products such as patches, gum, lozenges, nasal sprays and inhalers. NRT products flavoured with liquorice are not recommended during pregnancy.

Patches are best avoided during pregnancy, although use of a 16-hour patch may be appropriate if you have sickness or nausea. If you do use patches, remove them before you go to bed.

You're supposed to be prescribed it and counselled about it but fuck that, they haven't delivered (tho you could try your GP?) and the risks in pregnancy are really small, especially compared to smoking.

Very good luck and try not to worry too much, huge numbers of our mothers' generation cheerfully smoked through pregnancy and the vast, vast majority of us made it through fine. just celebrate every fag you don't smoke and focus on anything about pg that you enjoy

Bump for struggling MNer, I got back on wagon same day as my last post, still quit, you can do it!

Thank you :) It is nothing now, I quit!

I know this thread is pretty old. I just wanted to say how helpful it was to read, and how inspired I am having read about people's successes and the support shown. It's by far the most useful conversation thread I've found about the realities of quitting while pregnant. Thank you for that.