The things it's not socially acceptable to admit....

[ohthegoats]

... things like, since I got pregnant I've spent quite a chunk of time mourning the life I now WON'T have. Today is particularly bad, I just had a follow-up email from VSO about an interview I had in 2012. Details of available jobs in Asia and Africa. Then I started thinking about the international development MSc I planned on doing, but have been persuaded to postpone for now.

I'm a selfish mother already!

Anyone else got any?

I was also worried that I would be the only one feeling these things. :)

One of the kindest things I've been told are by some of my friends with (very much loved) kids are perfectly open about mostly minor little things they miss (e.g. 'triangle bikinis' not bra ones, work gripes, DH going to the pub with far more ease than them etc') and have reassured me it's quite normal for good responsible parents to look fondly back to their youth.

Also that they can do things like jobs, hobbies, fashion, the odd night out etc' after the first few scary months. That you don't have to stop being 'you' IYSWIM.

But I get moments of wobble where I think "maybe I'm just not as organised as them and will barely manage 1 PFB and nothing else and be a boring wreck!".

It's probably not socially acceptable to admit that today I have eaten a whole bag of jelly worm sweets (pregnancy has given me a thing for jelly sweets which I normally never eat) followed by a large bar of chocolate. I don't feel in the least bit guilty about this!

Really, really miss carefree foreign holidays. Have tried taking DC with us, but a 4 year old and two year old pretty much suck all the relaxing out of it. Also the cost makes it impossible for the next few years anyway. My two year old would not sit down during the long wait at the airport or on the plane. Neither kids slept very well at night when away and eating out was no fun when the two year old likes running off. Having a small self catering studio with open plan living meant we all had to go to bed at 8 pm ! Dreaming of a cocktail and sunshine right now.....mmmmm

I can bet its socially unacceptable to admit that your not looking forwarding to your new arrival at all :(

Dd2 was due yesterday. I'm still feeling like this is all one giant Fuck up. Feeling guilty doesn't even begin to cover it, but it is how I feel.

I'm not looking forward to a baby! I'm not minding the thought of a child in our lives, but a baby - nope. My thoughts are entirely preoccupied with alternative ways of changing my career, selfishly none of these plans involve boyfriend's career.. he's childcare!

Try try try not to waste time on guilt mojito x

Unexpected pregnancy and not wanting a baby leads to serious consequences but you get left alone to look after the baby which is fun!!

Wow - thank you. I feel more normal now. I don't like babies - I'm sure I will love mine - but not because it is a baby! Pregnany is a means to an end and I'm exciting about having a kids from about the age of 3 or 4. Babies don't last forever thank goodness. I'm looking forward to reading my favourite childhood stories to her and teaching her how to play the piano and doing lots of arts and crafts.

I hate being pregnant - it totally sucks - and the thought of breastfeeding makes me feel like going 'mooooooo'. I will have a go - but if it doesn't work out for me for whatever reason, then so be it. And because we delayed having kids so long - what I really hate is when people say - 'oh your whole perspective will change'. I think to myself - oh I hope not. I don't want to become the selfish parent where every waking moment revolves around your sprog... and you alienate all your friends who don't have children. I will love my child or if we are lucky children, but they won't be the centre of my universe and they will behave and the sun won't shine out their back end regardless of what they do! I feel like if I express this to people - they will call social services! I guess it was just how I was raised...

Jersey everytime I look at my huge swollen breasts I feel like going 'Moooo'!

That I'm looking forward to the experiencing birth already, despite being only 12 weeks yesterday? That I want sex but can't be arsed to instigate it because I'm downright lazy? That lots of things I'm blaming on the baby and tiredness is also me being lazy rather than a real reason.

Being 40 or over, at a last small gathering we pretty much admitted that we would rather have a fully formed 6 year old as our next offspring.

Pregnancy and babies are hard work. They are cute but 24/7 is hard. Even the grandparents admit the best thing about babies is handing them over back to the parents.

The best times were when DS as asleep in my arms, but even then I was afraid that he'd wake up. :)

Definitely feeling terrified at the thought of not being able to go back to work...well I can, but won't make all that much money once childcare and commute is paid for. I am alternating between wanting to meet the baby right now and a sickening feeling that my life is over and I'm going to regret everything!

Oh, also fed up of feeling like a whale - everyone is saying that I am 'holding it well' whatever that means - but doesn't stop me missing my 10/12 figure and wondering if it will ever come back.

Oh yes, and that its SO good to be able to blame the horrendous wind on the dog ;)

I also hate my massive boobs that'll get even bigger and saggier after birth but, dc1 loved bf, seeing her happy face after a feed is probably my happiest memory of her baby days. Won't beat myself up of it doesn't work for dc2 though, every situation is different.