Just got a bfp today after a year trying and worried I'm too old

[MightyQuin1201]

We've been trying for a year, since I was finally able to come off my meds for bipolar disorder... So, I'm VERY happy that I have a bfp (poas in the loos at work this morning), but now I am so worried about EVERYTHING being wrong, especially as I'm 39 & will be 40 when (if?!) the little one comes along... I foresee the next 9 months being full of worry and dread. How do I snap out of this?

Congratulations! I've had several friends have healthy happy babies at 40+ try not to worry :)

Ps... I think we worry whatever age we are!

Thanks Everlong
I'm so worried about not being able to cope if there is anything wrong or if I miscarry...

I had a baby at 42.
39 is not old.
Congratulations.
It really isn't unusual to have a baby in your 40s these days.

Sorry everyone! Trying to be positive
How was your pregnancy 3littlefrogs? Was it your first?

X

Welcome to the world of parenthood - you start to worry the minute you find out you're pregnant and it doesn't stop! I have just found out I am pregnant too and am 40 but trying to take each day as it comes. My GP pointed out that anxiousness and stress can contribute to miscarriage. It's easier said than done but take deep breathes and enjoy!

Congratulations!

A huge part of my illness is anxiety and stress. I will try and enjoy this new chapter though. Thanks everyone

Pah! Had one at 42 and one at 47! So you are young!

Congratulations! I had my DD when I was 41 and had no issues at all

TBH the pregnancy was a bit miserable because I had hyperemesis, but had it with my previous pregnancies as well, so that was nothing to do with my age.
Other than that though, everything was fine.

My wonderful dd is amazing and has brought so much joy to all of us.
Best mistake ever!!

I had my DS at age 40 (my first). Apart from bad morning sickness and anxiety it was a textbook pregnancy, although I did develop pre-eclampsia in third trimester. There is a slightly higher risk for this in older women, so the medics will probably keep an eye out for that. I'm typing this with DS (now 22 months) on my lap - he is just wonderful. Try to focus on all the amazing things you have to look forward to as a Mum!

How fabulous! I'm another mum who had a baby at 42. ( I bow to Lagoonablue though!) I hope you have a happy, healthy pregnancy..

Huge congratulations.
Being pregnant is scary whatever age you are as you have no control whatsoever.
The advances in medical care and monitoring plus our own knowledge means there is no reason for you to be any more worried than any other pregnant lady.
You will be well looked after and i hope you have a fab pregnancy.

Congrats.
I've just got a BFP after 9 months of trying - am 42 in June and this will be my first.
I feel bizarrely calm with the odd WTF moment when I think about the various hurdles we will need to get over before finally relaxing into the pregnancy. However, I'm a firm believer in what will be will be which is helpful.
It is also helpful that I'm trying to move house and, as a self employed main breadwinner, am more worried about how I am going to make that work!
Good luck with the pg

I had ds At 37 and dd three weeks before my 41st birthday.
When I first saw my GP when I got my bfp with ds I said I was concerned I was a bit old. He looked at me, liked at my notes, and said I wasn't that old and I'd be much more haggard when I had a toddler in tow!

Your age will help you. You'll get loads more medical attention than if you were younger. I saw this as positive.

Good luck!

Huge congratulations.

As others have said welcome to the world of parenting where worry and guilt are your new best friends :)

I had mine at 40 and 43. Both text book easy-peasy pregnancies and quick, straight forward labours (including home birth for DC2).
They are now 8 and 11 (and I'm 52 in a few months but I'm in denial about that!) and have enriched my life beyond measure.

Take each day as it comes, breath deeply and try to enjoy the whole experience.

39/40 is fine!

Are you having any other treatment for your MH now you've come off the tablets?

Congratulations!! I'm 27 and worry about this pregnancy all. The. Time. Age doesn't affect the worry!! I'm waiting for someone else with some referencing to back this up but anxiety and stress do NOT cause miscarriage! I don't think they're particularly great for the baby but I'm not sure what/how good the evidence on that is either. (if a miscarriage happens, it's usually caused by a chromosomal abnormality which couldn't have been avoided). I'm sure since you're that little bit older you'll be looked after all the more, good luck! X

Congratulations on your pregnancy! I'm interested to see you came off your medication - I have bipolar 1. I sympathise with your anxieties (am only a couple of years behind you age wise) and my bipolar certainly amplified some of the concerns all women have. I stayed on my medication throughout the whole pregnancy (due any day now!) with no problems and was categorically told not to come off the medication - I am in the Netherlands so advice might be different. The good news as well is that in most pregnant ladies with bipolar things improve rather than get worse during the pregnancy so fingers crossed you should be fine :)

Do you have regular access to the perinatal psychiatric team? It has really helped knowing I can discuss every small niggle with my psychiatrist. My consultant is also a specialist obstetrician focusing on women with psychiatric conditions which helps as he gets my concerns.

I don't want to tell you stuff you already know but the overwhelming advice was to stay as stress free as possible. Aside from that it's been a pretty uneventful pregnancy! Just extra scans and stuff but it reassured me to have all the extra care.

Good luck and enjoy :)

I'm finally able to look at the feed and I'm so grateful for all the lovely messages! Thanks all!

living I moved house last autumn to a whole new area so I'm still going through the rigmarole of referals for new psychiatric care, but I was referred for perinatal services a few weeks ago when I explained I was trying for a baby. I am bipolar ii and was taking lamotrigine which the doctors felt I needed to be off, and if necessary go on something else. When I came off, two things helped- regular talk therapy sessions and vitamin B12 shots! I had blood tests for Lupus due to a skin condition and they found my B12 was low- I swear the shots have made an enormous difference and I have them every couple of months now.

My DH and I really want this baby so I hope the pregnancy doesn't pose too many challenges- the main thing is at least we now know we CAN get pregnant.

I'm 40. No one anywhere at any point, medical or otherwise, has even mentioned my age as an issue. I'm high risk for other reasons, so it might be that if you aren't, then your age may end up pushing you into that category, but that just means extra care and them keeping an eye on you.

My GP was very positive about stuff, telling me to go for it etc.

Congratulations!

Hi! You are not too old. I'm 42 and having my first baby! I'm currently 30+2 so not long left! Apart from a high result for the combined test at 12 weeks, ( after cvs this was negative), I'm having an uneventful pregnancy. I am under consultant care but have welcomed this as I get extra scans and more opportunities to see our baby.
Good luck!