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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Pregnant and keep having contractions, very scared and confused

33 replies

weirdbird · 13/08/2006 23:37

I am quite new here, I am 21 weeks pregnant with my second child and had my 2nd trip to the Hospital on Friday with contractions.

Had a very problematic first pregnancy, lost my DD twin at 15 weeks and went into premature labour with her at 32 weeks, was monitored very closely all the way through, gave up work and finally managed to go to term, but had very bad AND and PND and felt like I lost who I was, because every single thing I did was dictated by my having to be extra extra careful because of the baby.

This time around things seemed to be going really well, apart from a hytias hernia being diagnosed (though thank god I now have medication) and pregnancy induced motion sickness (did I mention I seem to really, really suck at being pregnant?) then on Sunday of last week I started getting contractions, went into hospital, they stopped, was warned to take things easy for a while, that my chances of premature labour with my history where higher than average and sent home.

Did nothing mon - wed, thursday I helped make the dinner and put some washing on, Friday I did a bit more and stupidly had s**, contractions started up again, much stronger and more painful, back into hospital.

I had an internal and wasnt dilated, so they let me come home again in the hope that rest would make them stop,(as until you are 24 weeks they wont give you medication to help) they seem to have stopped, havn't had one today as far as I can tell.

But am scared and confused and wondering how I am ever going to cope, my daughter is 4 and starts school in a few weeks, we where meant to be leaving on holiday tomorrow, which we have cancelled.

Am just resting as much as I can again, but my husband goes back to work next week and I dont know how we will cope if I am still on virtual bed rest. Though they dont know what is triggering them and it may be that its not even something I am doing, but am just doing as little as I can in the hope that I avoid what ever "it" is, if I am triggering it...

Everything is a big ? and I am trying to relax "ha ha"

Am very scared and confused and really dont have a clue...

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Quootiepie · 13/08/2006 23:40

(((hugs))) do you have family around? Friends? Steer clear of sex, rasberry tea... any triggers. Im not an expert though. Stay stress free... leave mess round the house etc...

Original poster

weirdbird · 13/08/2006 23:57

My parents where actually staying to help us decorate when they started last week and stayed around, only went home this morning, but they live over 4 hours drive away so arn't around easily and both still work.

My in laws are nearby, but also work. Have various friends around but most of them work during the day (the curse of having had kids early, is most people I am friends with are still single, let alone having kids)

I have a few friends with children that I have made since having my daughter, but none of them live nearby enough to take her to school for me as we moved a year ago and although it is the same town its on the other side of it.

I'm sure we will work someting out, I just dont know what yet.

Another 5+ mths of no sex, is pants...

OP posts:

Quootiepie · 13/08/2006 23:58

maybe a fellow MNer lives nearby?

MaryBS · 14/08/2006 04:16

Whereabouts do you live (roughly, you don't have to give away too much info!)?

You could try contacting the school, see if they can make any suggestions...

Hang in there, try not to expect too much of yourself, the main thing at the moment is that the contractions have stopped. Your daughter doesn't HAVE to start school until the term in which she's 5.

emzickle · 14/08/2006 08:03

If you live in East Anglia - I'm on maternity leave, would be very happy to come and help out x

MarvellouslyMilitantPeachy · 14/08/2006 08:15

I'm absolutely certain we would help if we knew where you were? The other alternative I was thinking of was HomeStart, they have a website and a volunteer for 4 hours a week might make such a huge difference to the way you feel

I am also wondering if you have a WRVS near you? Or even a - oh no, my mind's gone blank, you know the poeple- have markets and make jam? Coz they can be amazingly helpful and really do show their value when they are asked to help with this sort of thing.

I'm sorry I won't be able to follow your stroy for the next few days as away. I will check when I get back though, and if you have any questions about HomeStart I used to be a manager for them so please e-mail me and as soon as I'm back (or before aboput 11 today) I will get right back to you- e-mial is peaches and cream 04 @ bt internet dot com. In the unlikely event you're in South Wales would be glad to help out too, or Somerset

Take care and I hope all goes well

emzickle · 14/08/2006 08:16

Do you mean the W.I. womens institute?

i always thought my mother should be institutionalised....

CaptainDippy · 14/08/2006 08:17

I'll help if you live anywhere near me honey!!

emzickle · 14/08/2006 08:17

Yeah - Wierdbird, let us know where you are, and I will come and help if I can x

MarvellouslyMilitantPeachy · 14/08/2006 09:17

bump this for anyone who has been there please

CaptainDippy · 14/08/2006 10:03

Bumping again - just cos I can!!

Original poster

weirdbird · 14/08/2006 11:01

Really upset, I know I shouldnt be cause its not my fault and there is nothing I can do, but we had saved up and purchased Annual Passes for Lego land for myself and my daughter, this was just before I found out I was pregnant this year, was very ill the first 3 months and we only made it there once. Have been once again a few weeks back.

Have been promising her that we would go again, but have just phoned Lego land and there is no way they can transfer my annual pass into someone elses name, and we cant afford to pay for another one, so hers is useless.

I don't want to have to tell her that not only are we not going on holiday she cant go to lego land again..

Am sat here crying my eyes out which is stupid cause there is nothing I can do, I just feel like I am dissapointing her at every turn at the moment, and shes not old enough to understand why.

OP posts:

Original poster

weirdbird · 14/08/2006 11:08

Having now read the other posts, thank you, I live in Staines.

If I possibly can manage it I want her to start school as she really wants to go

OP posts:

CaptainDippy · 14/08/2006 11:17

Not stupid at all - You are very emotional and have a lot "on your plate" atm - I am sure there are plenty of women on here who would completely understand your irrational, "why the heck am I crying about this now" behaviour - We've all been there, I am sure. Just concentrate on that little bean and on your daughter.

Hoping someone will post soon who has had a similar exprience - Just keep bumping!

I am sure there won't be a problem with your daughter starting school - do you have friends with children of the same age who will be able to pick her up and drop her off for you? Just contact the school and I am sure they will be more than happy to help. Staines is quite a way from me, I'm afraid, but here to listen - Thoughts and Prayers are with you - by the bucketload!! [hugs]]

CaptainDippy · 14/08/2006 11:18

She is old enough to have a grasp of "why mummy can't do lods atm", imho - Just talk to her and explain things to her - She is going to be a big sister - so she needs to help mummy etc.

emzickle · 14/08/2006 14:59

my geography is terrible. where is staines? lol

Quootiepie · 14/08/2006 15:12

Staines is near Heathrow... my DH works there. I live in Bracknell - not far, but im afraid I dont drive

Quootiepie · 14/08/2006 15:13

can someone not pretend to be you and take your DD to Legoland?

Original poster

weirdbird · 14/08/2006 15:28

I don't know how well Legoland check who is using Annual Passes, they do have a photo ID on them so it would be tricky if they where stopped...

Have calmed down again now, I think the mass cancelling of plans for things we where meant to be doing this past weekend (seeing "How do you solve a problem like Maria" being filmed for a start..) and over the next couple of weeks.. Cancelling holiday, cancelling meeting up with friends. All needed to be done, but very depressing to actually do.

OP posts:

YellowFeathers · 14/08/2006 15:32

You could just ring LegoLand and explain your situations and see if they will sway someone else to take your dd, either that or don't say anything and just let someone else use your pass.

Could you re-arrange for your friends to come to you instead. Ask them to bring supplies, drinks, snacks, a good film and have a nice night in?

Original poster

weirdbird · 14/08/2006 15:38

I did ring Lego land this morning and explained the situation, they wern't interested and said it is part of there terms and conditions, no exceptions.

Unfortunately we where meeting up with friends while on holiday, so had to phone them to let them know we wouldn't be meeting up.

Will no doubt meet up with them again at another time, we had just made arrangements to go to the beach together for the day and off to a play park another.

OP posts:

Quootiepie · 14/08/2006 15:42

thats awful about legoland...

prettybird · 14/08/2006 15:55

Try writing to the Chief Exec of Legoland, explaining your "sad" situation and how much you and in partiuclar your dd had been looking forward to making use of the pass. Really lay the sob story on thick. Decide if you want an extension and or to be able to transfer your pass to someone else, ask for it and say that is "all" you are asking for.

The call centre you talked to this morning won't have been empowered to do any more than give you the standard line you got (but you could also mention in you letter how much the hard line "distressed" you in your current vulnerable tate).

It's worth a try!

MaryBS · 14/08/2006 16:07

Definitely write to the Chief exec of legoland - always go to the top.

However I WILL say we have been to Legoland with our annual passes about 12 times in the past year and they have NEVER EVER checked our passes, not in the slightest, not on the gate or anywhere! I've even let other people in the restaurants and shops use my pass to gain the 10-25% discount and they've not queried it.

YellowFeathers · 14/08/2006 16:13

Agree with Prettybird!

Lay it on big time, well not that you need to but explain it to someone higher.
The call centre staff won't have the authority again like PB said so they won't say yes to cover their own back.

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