40 pregnant and feel embarrassed :(

[Hewhodares]

Hello people

I am a mumsnet novice so please bare with me. I'm confused and so worried and alone...but I'm not!
So here goes - I have two beautiful daughters aged 7&10 who are the light of my life. Happily married and been with my husband for 20 years - all good.
Run my own successful business...however one thing was always missing.. Baby no3. There was always meant to be 3. As my business grew after I had the girls Baby No3 had to wait. 18months ago I realised that we had better get a wiggle on! Four miscarriages later I am 15 weeks pregnant with no 3! Yippppeeeee!
However...I can't seem to tell anyone. My family and friends know about the previous m/carriages and were relieved when I said that we had decided to stop trying...baby no3 had other ideas!
I am so worried about what my friends and family are going to say - I think it's my age? I also think that they see me with a very busy business and think 'what the hell has she done that for?'
I know I've got to say something soon as my jeans are getting tighter!

Just feel very alone... And bloody stupid for worrying so much. I'm wondering if I'm just nervous of losing this one too and don't want to have to face tell everyone that I've mucked up again...
Thanks for listening and sorry for waffling...

Congrats!! I had my third at 42, he'll be 2 in May.

My friend just had her second dd (after countless miscarriages), her first dd is 9. She is 44!

I'm 40 next week and 17 weeks pregnant with #2. My daughter is sitting her GCSEs this year - so quite a gap!
We haven't told many people but the reaction has been positive. The only throwaway remark was made by the hospital midwife wondering why I wanted to start again with a baby!?
My husband and I had always wanted a second child, unfortunately we have not been lucky until now.

Congratulations!

I had mine at 42 and actually now he is here, I can't even remember what people said when I told them I was expecting.

Distant and irrelevant memory now he is one.

BIG picture......it really doesn't matter does it.

I'm another one! 9 weeks with DC3 after 3 years trying- older 2 are 3 and 5 and although we always said we wanted 3 people assume we have stopped at 2. I also run a very successful business and I think people think that was baby number 3. Haven't told anyone yet but expecting lots of shocked faces :-) Slightly worried about going back to the whole newborn thing after so long......

Congratulations! Don't worry about your age. It's quite common now to be an older mum!! I know, I'm 42 and just had my 4th. It was a complete mistake surprise but all is good and everyone very supporting.

Cannot tell you how much better all of these lovely messages are making me feel - thank you all so much for taking the time to respond.

Ps

"mucked up again"? Very unfortunate use of language to describe miscarriages that you and those of us who have suffered multiple miscarriages have absolutely no control over and in no way caused.

You have not mucked up, you have had horrible things happen to you.

stop worrying fuck them!!

congratulations

Congrats on a lovely no 3 and pls stop worrying.

Am nearly 40 And just found out am expecting dc2 after a long (6yr) time of varied effort trying / life interruptions. Feel ancient and that I'll get many nosy questions about how long we've been trying etc. am determined to use 'did you mean to sound so rude' on each dodgy question.

No. 3 babies sound great. Despite room/money/age issues would love one. At this rate I'd be 45 so that won't happen.

All the best and pls stop worrying.

Honey, I was 42 when I fell unexpectedly pregnant with my third child. She is six now. If anyone should have been embarrassed it would be me...six months gone, standing in divorce court, trying to get my divorce final before her arrival..

Congratulations! After 12 yrs of infertility, two adopted dc and a divorce, I somehow got pg last yr by my new bf (of 10 months ). At the age of 40.

Life is a funny thing but it's worked out brilliantly .

Congratulations! I can understand your reservations but I agree with the other posters: everyone will be delighted for you. Those that say anything negative, just tell them to fuck the fuck off!

Enjoy your pregnancy - and sharing your wonderful news!

DC were 6 and 8 when number 3 was born, and I was 39. The thought of other people's reaction almost put us off trying for him. I had a hard time after DC2 - as a consequence so did my Mum and I thought she'd be devasted. Of course, everyone was utterly thrilled. I got round the problem of telling people by telling DC first and letting them tell their grandparents. Much excitement all round.

I think announcing it positively is really important. Make sure people know that this is what you want. You could just start with "I have some good news to tell you".

GAH! My post should say 18 and 15! I. did NOT have my first child at 13!!!
OP How about laying the groundwork with a few little hints. A few "feeling amazing/blessed" fb statuses. Maybe a few texts with "Morning, what an amazing day" that kind of stuff to get people wondering why you're in such a fab mood, then break the news with a huge "TADA!"
Think positive. :-)

I am laughing my head off @SaggyOldClothCatPuss hmmmm now that may have been trickier for you to announce ;)
I am just going to get this weekend over with and then spill... I'm definately winding myself up and making this into a bigger deal than is necessary - I hope.

I am 40 and had DC2 four months ago. No one at all has made any comment whatsoever about my age. If anything people have tended to ask whether we intend on having a no 3! I know loads of women who have had babies in their early 40s (with or without large gaps from earlier children), I think it is becoming a norm now. Please relax about this and just enjoy your wonderful gift. Congratulations!

Thank you @fairypangolin

Congratulations my DDs are 15 and 12 and I had DS 18 weeks ago and I'm 42. The best thing I ever did (although ask me again at 3am) :)

We stopped trying for DC2 after 2 mc when I was 40 and then she arrived when I was 41. Apart from a few jokey 'you must be mad' comments (DS was 16 and in the middle of his GCSEs) all anybody had to say was congratulations. My brother actually cried when I told him - the big softy.

Congratulations, here's to a happy and healthy pregnancy

Oh that's so lovely.... So lovely.

It does give me comfort to hear such positive stories. Thank you both @MadameJosephine and @Foxeym x

Congratulations! I'm (just!) 39 and am trying for my first, after finally meeting a man who I'd want to have children with. I can only hope, at this stage, I know. But if anyone was anything less than thrilled for me, they would get a punch in the face.

I wish you a happy and healthy pregnancy and all the joy in the world.

Good luck rabbitfromahat hope it doesn't take too long to get your first then maybe you'll have time for more!