PG after MC, the new and shiny POSIFRICKINTIVITY thread...

[SaggyOldClothCatPuss]

Oops! I posted the last post and didn't link to a new thread! Sorry!
Anyway, here it is, come on in for the best support going and a safe place to vent. and a lovely squishy new set of twins

Hi jelly sorry for your mc but congratulations on the BFP, you are in excellent company here.

anda glad you are back home

ibip I'm very impressed, both that your DH would attempt electrical stuff and that you fixed it.

christine definitely get it looked at - you don't want to knacker your knee up by walking on it when it isn't right.

pumpkin good luck for your 20 weeker are you finding out?

I have the most horrible cough, I have pulled all the muscles along the bottom of my bump hacking my guts up :( I miss medecine

Welcome Jelly. This is a fantastic thread for support.
Anda it won't be long now! Hang in there!
IBIP well done for trying! I once spent the afternoon wiring in some new wall lights. I did a fantastic job, they looked great, and when I turned the fuse back on, the came on instantly.
Sadly, they never went off, because the ones I'd taken down had individual switches built in and these didn't! I couldn't turn them off! I had to take the bulbs out!
Christine have you tried a short walk? My knee often pops out of alignment, a walk sometimes helps.
Pumpkin YAY for 20 weeks!

hi jell - congrats on your bfp :) you;re in a good place with these ladies, best support group around :)

pink i'm so impressed with your electrician skills! in your face boys! i might go get some grey paint today eek!

yay for the 20 week club - another milestone!

i managed to survive the hen, was great craic until we went to the club and i instantly got sleepy (although baby seems to LOVE dirty hip hop beats!!) so glad to be feeling fresh today! i know the rest of them are probably still partying! omri hope you had a good night :)

Hi all. It's been a week since my first post as by the time I catch up on the posts I don't have time to do my own post!

I'm very edgy at the moment as I'm 9 weeks tomorrow - which is about the time I had a MMC last time. I don't think I've ever felt as stressed as I have since I found out I was pg. I'll be glad to get past the next week and then I'll be hanging out for my 12 week scan. I hoping if that all goes ok I'll be able to relax a bit. But maybe not....

To add to the comments about having an early scan I would have a bit of a reservation about having a private scan. I had a private scan last time at 10 weeks just because we were due to be on holiday over the 12 week scan and didn't want to go away without checking that everything was ok. I had no reason to believe there was any problems (though with hindsight there probably was) so a bit of a shock to be told I'd had a MMC. Was then advised to go to the EPU but the EPU wanted me to come back to have another scan with them the following day just to be sure. It was frustrating as there was no doubt (no heartbeat and baby 1 week too small) so just added to the pressure. And which is why I don't want to go for a private scan this time around. But if I was offered an early scan at the EPU I'd want to have that.

On the more positive side of things I've been enquiring about pre-natal pilates. Has anyone done this before? I haven't done pilates before but my pelvic floor is not what it was pre DD and while it's fine at the moment that may not be the case later pregnancy / after labour. Also my tummy got very big last time and one of my friends has had problems with her stomach muscles post DD2 so I want to try to prevent the same thing happening.

Will try to keep to shorter / more regular posts from now on!

Janice's glad you had a fab hen
Party. Just dubbed out of one for the end of September. It's at the other end of he country and I would be travelling down on my own. Feel really bad about it but just don't think I could manage the journey on my own well. Gutted.

New pregnancy thing noted today. freckles all the way up my cheekbones. Don't normally get freckles much.

Janie I'm impressed you managed a hen do, I'm asleep by about 9pm these days!! Zzzzzzzz

Hope you're ok anda, glad they are looking after you well.

Only one more whole day to get through until scan on Tuesday....!

Good luck with the scan Guff.

Crossing everything for Christine's knee, Anda's allround good health, and Guff's scan tomorrow (plus anyone I missed out).

Had a complete flaky batso meltdown on Saturday night, and sobbed for two hours (bit unlike me, I'm usually in the middle of the flaky bell curve). Told husband that I was quite certain this one was dead, and there was no point waiting to find out, and he should leave me at once for someone else. He quite sensibly told me I was talking utter mince, and sat with me whilst I spouted rot.

Ugh.

gggrrr, I've just written sth and lost it!!

guff good luck with your scan today!

tea you must have freaked out your poor DH But I know where you're coming from... I was really dismissive during my booking appointment with the midwife, I said something along the lines of "I've had 2 MMCs, I have no idea how this one is going so it's very likely that I'm wasting your time". She didn't know what to say to me!

Janie I didn't realise you had a hen do as well - I hope you had fun!

pumpkin yay for 20 weeks!! I hope you manage to stay strong till Friday, I don't even want to remember how stressed I was in the lead-up to my anomaly scan

ibip I'm impressed by your electrician skills!

jmf from the sounds of it we don't live too far from each other (well, by London - and surrounding areas - standards). I'm in Middlesex but only 5 minutes from the Hertfordshire border!

jelly I forgot to say welcome & congratulations! It's a scary time but fingers crossed everything goes well for you!

Scan is tomorrow at 12! I have one more whole day to wait....

Hope you're feeling better tea I think it helps to sometimes let it all out and then pick yourself up and dust yourself down. TODAY YOU ARE PREGNANT

Guff I have my fingers and toes crossed for you (no mean feat) and I'm sure that tomorrow is going to be just fine. I can only imagine how nervous you must be!

Tea your DH sounds lovely! And breakdowns are inevitable. The helplessness is the worst feeling about this - I hate that there is nothing you can do to control the outcome!

Logged onto FB this morning to discover a really good friend is due on the same date as I would have been if I hadn't MC'd. I knew they were trying and I was half expecting an announcement soon but it felt like such a kick to the gut (making me feel like an evil bitch). I'm trying to muster up some excitement for them but I feel so devastated even although I am pg now. We're in the 5th week and I'm terrified that I am going to MC this weekend. To make matters worse DH is away and everyone I know is heading off somewhere lovely so I am going to be stuck at home by myself... massively struggling with the posifrickintivity today.

Oh, tea and kjh - sorry you're feeling emotionally beaten up. Its shit, in every possible way, these early stages of pg after mc. Just do what you have to do to survive. So kjh don't worry about how you're feeling about your friend. I had the same and was shocked at myself at how evil, shallow and bitchy I felt, because it was so unlike me. But it is entirely natural to want to scratch the eyes out of anyone who has sailed through pg, so let yourself feel that way, and know that actually when it comes to seeing her/her baby, you feel very differently because you're not a shallow evil bitch really. Its just your mind's way of protecting yourself.

My booking appt ended abruptly with me sobbing and saying I couldn't do it. The mw was an angel, took the bare minimum of details I needed to get booked in for the dating scan, and then made a follow up appointment for after the dating scan to do all the paperwork.

guff - good luck tomorrow.

Keeping my fingers crossed that anda is OK. She said they were filming - there's a bbc documentary about midwives starting this week, so I wonder if that's the hospital she's in. If you're reading this, anda I hope you're relaxed - even if you're having to be constantly monitored or are stuck in hospital, I would rather you were relaxed but bored than stressing.

Yes kat is the 12 week. Feel so sick and terrified as it was the 12 week scan we found out last time. BUT I've had a good 7 week scan and am trying so hard to keep positive.

Has felt like an endless wait to get to tomorrow but you will get through it too because you just have to. I think you are right to focus on the small milestones, that is what is getting me through.

Thanks so much Kat and Santa - have wrapped myself up in a blanket and broken out the good cookies and am sitting here reading a trashy book while being mauled by an overactive kitten. Should be enough of a distraction from the self pity!

Kat you are right - you just have to take it one day at a time. Enjoy the posifrickintivity when it comes along and try and ride out the lows. We have two weekends to get through until 8wk scan (well it'll be 7+5 when they do it) so I am trying to plan nice, distracting things for us to do between now and then. If we can just make it through to next week without any bleeding I might start to feel a bit better. We have done something similar to what you have done. I have a calendar with key dates on it. Gradually adding more details to it as we go along, hoping it is going to coincide with an increase in confidence and belief that this pg might work out!

Santa the MW sounds very understanding. How much longer until your scan? As hard as it is - sometimes we need to try and believe that this is actually going to happen tries desperately to take own advice

Hoping Anda is ok xx

Hello all, yes, am fine, but feeling sorry for myself and very anxious so didn't want to be all maudlin and me me me.

I'm back in mat triage for the fourth time in four days. Wish they'd just keep me in - it would be so much leas hassle than spending 4 hours a day here.

The babies are fine but my blood pressure is still high - the beta blockers don't seem to have had any effect. Haven't seen a doctor since Friday so just waiting for that now.

Anda do what I did when dd went overdue...
When the doctor says "we will book you in for x day" turn round and say "sod that, I've got my bags, find me a bed I'm staying!"
Induction started later that day!

Oh saggy I'd love to. But I had to fight for 38+2 which is still 10 sleeps away, and the doctor's already told me she wants to carry on working towards that. She's just been back and said she wants to do a full examination but have to wait for her to finish in theatre again, so should see her around half two. I've been here since 9.30!

Santa from what I can gather it was the father the film crew was following, rather than the mother or the hospital/midwives. All I know is it was for the BBC.

Urgh diet- how frustrating! Still, at least every day is a step towards the date you wanted. It is the most unfortunately stressful end to a stressful pregnancy - but look at it that way. 10 sleeps (max) and you will have your babies. Not long now.

I completely understand on the friend envy. My friend who had been through many miscarriages herself, helped - she said that she wasn't jealous of other people being pregnant - because those were their babies. And she didn't want those babies, she wanted her own baby. While I know it doesnt help with the sadness and stress, it really helped me not get jealous of others that were pregnant. Don't know if this will help anyone else but thought I'd throw it out there :)

Anda you aren't manipulative enough! did you cry? Was there snot? Can you not "go on another day with this worry?" And you should definitely come over a bit faint.....

IME, there's a better chance of being taken in at the start of the week. My local hospital does NOT like admitting people into maternity if they are likely to be in for weekend! Give them hell!

Ooh. I'm going to the saggy school of dramatics when it comes to my turn! There is a lady who knows how to get what she wants!!!