PG after MC, the new and shiny POSIFRICKINTIVITY thread...

[SaggyOldClothCatPuss]

Oops! I posted the last post and didn't link to a new thread! Sorry!
Anyway, here it is, come on in for the best support going and a safe place to vent. and a lovely squishy new set of twins

I want Pate now you BUGGERS!

Piffy - yep, been there. Had 12 week scan, was happy for all of 2 days, then had a bleed and straight back to terrified. Keep going. I promise it does get easier (a little bit). I found the 20 week scan to be the 'big' milestone I was expecting the 12 week scan to be, and every day after that gets a little better. Just read that at the end of this week, (week 27) baby will have a 95%chance of survival. So that helps.
I don't think any of us will be happy until baby in arms, but keep going. It will get easier.

ibip yay! It's a massive milestone

piffy it depends. For some, it goes away with every scan and every week that goes by. For me, I still feel like that at 36+4 but I have a high risk pregnancy (twins) - have often wondered if I was having a singleton pregnancy I'd have relaxed any more. I honestly don't know the answer. We still have very little for the babies in the house - it was all delivered to my parents'. I had a bit of a meltdown this week because DH wallpapered the 'nursery'. It looks lovely, but I panicked because it wasn't easily undo-able if something went wrong. I still haven't bought a changing bag because their returns policy is 14 days!

I have probably not helped myself or DH by being in denial for so long - we're not prepared at all. I have just been protecting myself - it's my way of coping.

Do whatever you have to do to get you through the day, then the week, then the month. Time will start going quicker, I promise.

Ha saggy that'll teach you to go on about fudge and take everyone down with you

Thanks for the replies. I feel a bit better finding out what i am feeling is normal. Its not something i can say to anyone in RL so it was good getting it off my chest. Ill just have to keep taking it day by day. Ive made it this far

Hello ladies, hope you're all doing well. I'm up in Scotland this week, mostly up mountains and far from wifi/reception so haven't had a chance to post, but have been dipping in occasionally to keep up (things move fast!)

kat really pleased to hear you had a promising sounding scan on Monday and hope you're doing ok still. I totally sympathise with your panic about what's going on in there - I'm in a similar boat, at 6 + 3 (ish) - had a MMC four months ago and whenever I think about it I'm pretty convinced that something is bound to go wrong or indeed has already gone wrong. Minimal symptoms this time round, only a bit puky in the late afternoon/evening (sick burps, nice). I only found out about previous MMC at 12 weeks but it had happened very early, at 4/5 weeks, so I'm trying not to give the idea of a baby too much head space until 8 week scan - have decided I'm going to EPU on 28 August - and keeping as busy as possible until then, and attempting to think about it as a secondary pregnancy test! i'm not 'fully' pregnant i reckon until i've seen there's actually a baby in there. And the stats are so much better once you've seen a heartbeat at 8 weeks (something like 98% of women won't miscarry once past that stage) that I sort of don't want to see an earlier 6/7 week scan and get my hopes up too much. It's all a weird psychological game I'm playing... It's good to have company on the journey here.

piffy even for people who are pre- 8 weeks the chances are DEFINITELY higher that we'll end up with a baby at the end of it than not. And if you're past 12 weeks then chances are very very good indeed! Does that help? That said, for me I think it's always going to be 'if' I have a baby until I actually have one in my arms, though perhaps the anxiety will recede a bit as time goes on...pink thanks for your message, that's so lovely to hear.. Woohoo for third trimester.

Wow lots of news to catch up on.

Shell Hurrah for healthy Boy! you much still be buzzing

kjh Please don't worry, that thing about the placenta not kicking in yet definitely rings a bell (but if that were the case why can we not drink in 1st trimester?) Either way one slip so early on will make no difference I'm sure.

Pink Loving the positivity. Wish I was feeling it but not quite yet, till only 7.2wk here and still filled with dread.

piffy I felt very much like you in my first pregnancy. I think the 20 wk scan was the big milestone for me, I relaxed after that one.

kat I am not in a position to have an early scan unfortunately But I am sure I would be the same as you - I don't think a scan would reassure me for long. In some ways I think early scans don't really do a lot - but the fact is there was a very healthy baby in there on Monday and thats the most reassurance you can get. Birds is right - the odds are ALWAYS in your favour.

I've had a really tough few days. The nausea and sickness has really knocked me for six. I almost don't believe it can be a good sign to feel this unwell - its not just nausea that I could snap out of and ignore like in my first pregnancy. Its total and utter all over body lethargy and permanent feeling of 'I'm going to be sick' - but I never am. I struggle to get out of bed - this morning I woke at 10 and I'm going back to bed now. Family have been amazing and taking DS off my hands for whole afternoons at a time, but otherwise he is watching waaay too much Cbeebies and I am really struggling to engage with him. I feel like nausea and sickness are one thing but this feeling that my entire body is out of order is really freaking me out. It reminds me of what someone said earlier in the thread about the way she felt before a mmc - that she felt ill not just morning sicky. I'm sleeping badly, my digestion is up the creek and I just want to cry all the time at my inability to function. In my 1st pregnancy I carried on working long hours, travelled lots, went out in the evenings - this time I have cancelled every thing in the next 4 days and am now considering cancelling a holiday next week. And I feel like such a fraud as I'm not actually throwing up!

Pink that is so lovely! So happy you are feeling the posifrickintivity today - excited for you :) You have given me hope that I'll be in your position 21 weeks from now!

Piffy congrats on your scan! You just passed a big milestone. Birds is right, the stats are on your side which can only be a good thing. You aren't alone here, we all feel worried. I am trying very hard not to be completely neurotic. Like Anda I find it helps not to think too much about the end result (although her lovely little girls will be with us very soon!) just take things a stage at a time. I'm concentrating on making it past 6weeks, then I'll have been pregnant longer than the last time. It's just a two-week wait until the 8wk scan and I'm not allowing myself to think beyond that at this point. Fx for you I am sure everything is going to go well.

Saggy consider that payback for the fudge!

Thanks sleep - phoned mum this morning who echoed what you all said and told me she ate pate the entire way through her pregnancy and we all turned out almost normal. I'm not sure I can take too much comfort from that, she had three very premature babies. Completely failed to carry a pregnancy to full term.

Sounds like you are having an awful time. A friend of mine had exactly the same thing as you throughout the first trimester of her second pregnancy. She didn't have MS as bad as with her first but was exhausted and barely able to function, although it eased off between weeks 10 and 12. She had a very active toddler to contend with and I'm sure this must have added to the exhaustion. If you are really worried is it worth just making an appointment with your GP to double check things are ok? Might help with peace of mind. Sorry you are having such a rough time. Glad you have supportive family, Fx you feel better after a good sleep and some relaxations xxx

sorry for the early worries lots of you are having :( take one day at the time, there's not really any other way unfortunately. as someone else said, i think i'll only be relaxed when there's a real baby in my arms!

pink i love the grey / white bedroom...do you mind me asking what grey you used? we've been looking for ages nut can;t decide on the right one!

i'm out on a hen do later on....with a bunch of total party animals!!! will be difficult to be the only sober one! ut i can just escape when i feel like it so that's good :)

Argh. Midwife has just turned up unannounced and I'm bloody glad she did - BP is higher and I now have protein in my wee as well. Have to go back to the hospital at 4. Babies' hearts are fine, but I really need to stay away from google - scaring myself stupid. Amazing thing is that apart from what I've considered to be 'normal' pregnancy symptoms like nausea and heartburn, I've felt okay - if I wasn't having twins and hence more appts they wouldn't have picked this up and I wouldn't have called the midwife for this.

oh anda you poor thing :( hope they let you rest up and give you the care you need. best to take all their advice (as you know). try not to panic, you are in good hands xxxx

janie I know, I am. Have got myself properly worked up. I meant it was amazing that other pregnant ladies in the same situation might not get the care they needed because they didn't feel 'ill enough'

Aw Anda. Hope all is well. I'm glad you had a visit too! Know what you mean though, but then when you get to the end of pregnancy you have appointments every two weeks anyway, don't you?

Fingers crossed all is well (I guess there's a chance you might be meeting Marjorie and Ethel a little earlier than expected?!)

Lots of love to you xxx

Diet - glad you being watched so closely. Stay away from google lovely!! You know better than that! Your girls are a good size now, so IF anything were to happen, all will be fine. Hope you are being seen to as I type this!

Janie - I love grey and white, it v cute, but be warned - it's hard to find stuff for! We literally just wanted plain grey and white - no characters or anything, it's so hard to find it all! John Lewis have a basic white range - never in stock - but not going to bother with bumper etc now.
The grey we used is crown paint - cloud burst. It's a little darker than I was expecting, has a slightly purpley hint to it, but I love it now. Just been out to get some white blankets, white rug, white picture frame for the wall (lots of little frames joined - going to put black and white photos in it) and a white mobile tht DH really wanted. The bunny on it creeps me out a little. But it's the only thing he has shown a real interest in, so it's going on the cot!
If you like characters - kiddicare do a white and grey range, (with creepy bunny) and babies r us also do a white and grey pooh bear range. John Lewis do a grey stars one, but kinda clashed with our butterfly theme :)

Hope everything is well with you and your babies anda xx

Oh pink it sounds so lovely! I'd be tempted to do our own room like that too!! I know what you mean about characters...I'm not too keen on that either, maybe rather have little pieces you can change rather than having a whole character 'theme'. Ooh it's so exciting! This is all so real! Xx

Shell you had a boy last time? Ill lay money on this being a girl for you. I felt exactly like that with DD!
I'm very jealous of everyone decorating nurseries! This baby's giant big brother is currently occupying the future nursery! I figure we have a couple of years him to either leave home or set up camp in a caravan in the garden! He is nearly 18 so we might get lucky!
Anda it sounds like you are in good hands. They are keeping an eye on you and you know if they have any worries, those babies will be whipped out of there faster than you can say "Pampers"!

Ok. I take my pâté based fudge retribution!

Punk- that sounds gorgeous! My bedroom is White/grey and a bit of pale pink (nicer than it sounds!!) we haven't painted yet but have a paint called silver mist which is quite pale I think. Yours sounds very tasteful.

Love the grey and white. Sounds v understated and classy (don't you know?!). Wish we weren't renting so we could do up our own style...

Janie I'm off on my lil sisters hen tonight. Still in bed as have had horrible stomach all day. And my lil sis doesn't know so will be expecting me to be having drinks and going to the night club after.dont really want to tell her my news yet. And ESP not on her hen night. Dp told me I have actually turned green. Honest to god green face and bloodshot eyes. yes, i am the hulk. Dreading this. If it was ANYthing else I'd have cancelled.
I'm just going to have to put loads of make up on and fill the handbag with crackers
At least my mom and other sisters will be there (and they know I'm pg)

Thinking of you andadietcoke - I'm really glad they are keeping a close eye on you and your precious babies.

Anda- hope all is well And that you are being well looked after

Saggy- that's what I was thinking when I was reading about the pâté ... Hmmmmm pâté

I've been to my Dad's wedding today. It was really sweet. There wasn't a reception so the siblings and I went to McDonald's after!
On the way home I dragged DP and DS round Mothercare! It suddenly hit me that I'm having a baby! I had a little bit of dust in my eye for a while!
Sadly, I have fallen madly in love with the Stokke Explory pram. I'd better start saving! it costs more than my car did!

I'm avoiding pâté, but I'm going to make Malteser fudge later!

ibip that sounds lovely. It did make me think of when DD projectile pooed up the wall though! Newborn poo is an amazing colour range, this was bright bright yellow - which was luckily the colour of her walls , remember to point the bum away from the beautiful walls!

anda I hope all is going well at the hospital xx