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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

I am sooo sick and tired of people saying...

47 replies

emkana · 02/05/2006 20:09

..."oh my god you're huge"

What am I supposed to say to that???

Also always makes me wonder whether I should explain about having too much amniotic fluid and the implications of that...
but why would people be interested?

Honestly I'd love to go into hiding for the next five-ish weeks until this baby is born, with all the question marks over the baby's health I just can't stand the comments, or questions like "Are you getting excited?" etc.

Sad

Before somebody tells me off btw, I know people mean well etc., but it still doesn't make it easier for me.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Wills · 02/05/2006 20:11

I completely understand. its beyond me as to why its suddenly ok to comment about a womans' size simply because she's pregnant. I've not come across a woman yet that doesn't worry about their size during pregnancy from "am I too fat" to "am I too small". Stuff em emkana

SenoraPostrophe · 02/05/2006 20:11
Sad

think of it as a vote of sympathy. I say it to people, but only because I hate being hugely pregnant. i see why you hate it though.

AllieBongo · 02/05/2006 20:11

It's v annoying. You're just good at growing bonny babies!!!

veNivIDiViCkiqV · 02/05/2006 20:12

Tell them they look tired/something else similarly thoughtless OR ask them to do something on account of your being so huge.....

Anything to make you feel better Smile

Sorry you are having such a pants time hun.

x

SenoraPostrophe · 02/05/2006 20:12

i don't worry about my size though wills, i just hate it. can see how comments might rub it in (never occurred to me before)

busybusybee · 02/05/2006 20:14

When I was pg with dd one lady at m&t commented on my size every week for 6 months. I have no idea why I didnt floor her with a rude remark:

"Gosh Arent you ugly? You have horrible teeth! You are thick! You smoke! You are fat!"

All of which would have been appropriate :o Shock

Tell them to mind their own Emkana - Its your baby and your tummy!

Christie · 02/05/2006 20:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

emkana · 02/05/2006 20:59

Yes I love that part when people ask me "how long to go?" I say "five weeks" and they say "Really?" totally wide-eyed and incredulous...

Angry
OP posts:
motherinferior · 02/05/2006 21:00

Oh christ, I loathed it. Happened to me all the time in my second pregnancy. Also comments on the size of my norks, ffs.

Blu · 02/05/2006 21:03

Grrrrr on your behalf.
Every pregnant woman has to put up with becoming public property, and an almighty deluge of cliches, but in your case it is more than harmlessly irritating, and I don't know what to suggest.

Vent and sound off.

tuppenceworth · 02/05/2006 22:07

Blu - you're absolutely right; when you're pregnant your body is no longer your own and people whom you've never met see fit to comment on your appearance and your actions. If you eat tuna, nuts, cream cheese or a steak anything but medium-well done it's tantamount to pre-natal child abuse. You can only drink water and even then it's got to be still bottled water. You can't sit down for too long or stand for too long either (varicose veins you see!), you can't wear tights, short skirts, underwired bras, synthetic fibres, flip flops, heels (even court shoes), you can't get your fat swollen ankles into your trusty comfy zip up boots and sexy shoes are definately out! So you're confined to pyjamas and slippers, eating organic fruit and vegetables whilst delicately sipping a vintage Evian!

Then there's the questions and comments from strangers - 'how far along are you?' followed by the inevitable 'you're not very big - are you looking after yourself?' or 'are you sure there's only one in there?'

At least when you try and strangle them with an oversized maternity bra you'll get off by blaming your hormones!! Smile

edam · 02/05/2006 22:12

There's something about pregnancy that makes people treat you as if you are an infant. Strangers feel able to touch you although they would never touch another adult without permission. You are somehow 'safe' and removed from the normal rules of adult-to-adult behaviour.

bramblina · 02/05/2006 22:12

I was fortunate enough not to get those comments, but if I did my quick reply would be "thanks for the confidence boost" or "now there's one I haven't heard before" or just go for it- "so are you". Nobody has the right to make judgement. Put them back where they tried to put you! I can't be doing with people being polite just to avoid offending.
It's not fair!

kayzed · 02/05/2006 22:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CarmenH · 02/05/2006 22:50

Could try something like "yes I know, and when are you due?" or "yes I know, what's your excuse?" Would work esp well if other person male with a beer gut Grin or female and known to not be pregnant.

1Baby1Bump · 02/05/2006 22:53

am just approaching 6 months and get those comments about being huge already.
not much hope for me then!

a male colleague calls me 'fatty'.- in jest of course!

:o

milward · 02/05/2006 22:59

Had this - drove me crazy! Also people saying - You still here!! when I had weeks to go. best wishes emkana xxx

edam · 02/05/2006 23:06

Kayzed's idea about 'in 20 minutes' is good - I went to a work do with loads of GPs on my due date. Every one asked 'when's it due' and then panicked when I answered 'today' in case I went into labour there and then and expected them to do something about it!

jabberwocky · 02/05/2006 23:17

Oh, I had this too. Everyone kept saying, "Well, you'll never carry that baby to term" and things like that, like I was so big he was going to just pop out right in front of them. And the really annoying thing about it was that I had had pre-term labour so carrying him to term (or close to it anyway) actually was a really big deal. grrrr

You might just come back with a surprised look and a "Do you think?" and then proceed to totally ignore them.

Thomcat · 02/05/2006 23:32

I can only echo the wonderful Blu on this one. Sorry hon' as it really can't be making it easy for you right now.

On the subject of people feeling they have right to you when you are pregnant, - I was in the cafe downstairs from where I work when pregnant with DD2. The owner, who I sort of know from eating there asked if he could touch the bump, so although i'd rather he hadn't I said 'errrr, yeah , okay...' and he proceede to rub it so hard it sent me back on my heels and then he kissed it!!!! I was so totally gobsmacked!

Gingerbear · 03/05/2006 00:01

can't you just shrug your shoulders, smile and waffle on (ie a string of expletives said in the nicest possible way) in German? Wink

sniff · 03/05/2006 09:05

yes I agree with you especially in your situation I got it a lot the last times as I was ill with Gestational Diabetes - big babies far to much fluid
I used to retort yeah but I can lose this wieght probably not the politest person in the world am I

best of luck for the next 5 weeks I have 3 to go and I think I might go in to hiding to preferably under a comfy duvet!

olivo · 03/05/2006 10:05

1baby1bump - are you me? I get exactly the same comment from one of my colleagues, I'm only 24wks!Grin

wannaBe1974 · 03/05/2006 11:21

say "yes I know, but you're ugly and I'll only be this huge for another 5 weeks whereas yours is the cross of a lifetime". :O

Milly1707 · 03/05/2006 13:59

I am only 20weeks but already have a large bump. I am in all my maternity clothes.

Every day I get comments for complete strangers saying 'are you sure there is only one in there?' I am so tempted to get t shirt printed with:

Yes, there is only one
I am due in September
I might breastfeed and I might not
AND no you can't touch my bump!!!!

Do you think that would work???