Ridiculous comments are driving me mad!!

[Nicky1306]

ARGHHHH!

If one more person says something stupid to me I swear I'm going to go mad ! I'm usually a quiet person, and generally don't let things get to me , I must work with some of the most annoying dumb people out there!

Since announcing my pregnancy I've heard/been told / asked the following

Is insert name of dp here happy?!
Was it planned?
Oh you look really pregnant today
Ohhhh that top/skirt won't fit you for long
Are you going to live together? ( currently we don't live together)
Where are you going to live?
Are you going to move ?
Ohhh you've eaten a lot today!
Careful don't stretch!
Oh you shouldn't be carrying that (it was two folders!)

Arrrrghhhhhh! I think it's because I'm not used to being and dont really like being the centre of attention, the comments about the size of my bump are also driving me nuts ! I showed early and carried all out front with DD and this time is no different! But everyone feels the need to comment on how huuuugggge I am lol I don't think it helps that this time I'm really worried about getting too fat whereas last time with dd (different dp) I didn't care!

Just having a moan really......anyone else getting bored of the constant and stupid comments? Feel free to add ones you have been subjected to!!
Xx

At 12 weeks just after announcing pregnancy 'Are you excited?!' My response - No... I've got 28 weeks left
Last week after throwing up 'Oh you look really well' - Are you kidding me? I've just thrown up in your toilet!

Send an email round entitled Nicky1306's Pregnancy Update.

In it answer all the questions you posted in your OP.

Then add "If you have any additional questions and/or comments please write them down on a piece of paper then place that carefully in the round filing tray that can be found beneath my desk"

Or, smile and nod.....smile and nod......

It seems we become public property once we're pregnant and people think it's fine to say whatever they like.

I'm only 16 weeks and work on my own so don't see many people, when we announced the news after the 12 week scan on facebook one of my husbands friends said "are you shocked", cheeky cow, I replied and told her no, because it was planned.

Why do some people assume it's an accident because we're 'older' parents ?(I'm 37, him 42)

I had the 'was it planned?' one last week from a woman in my pilates class - no congratulations or anything. Spent the rest of the class glowering and wanting to push the silly cow over! Maybe people can't think of anything else to say, but I was really taken aback at her lack of manners!

I am getting used to all the comments though, and there's some great suggestions for replies here -
pregnantchicken.squarespace.com/pregnant-chicken-blog/2011/1/15/clever-pregnancy-comebacks-part-one.html

ha! I got "oh! is that why you got married? I was wondering!" by someone who was invited to our wedding 5 months before the wedding date, and I was only a few weeks gone on the day!

the comments i can cope with, being told your huge!! and are you having twins in a single pregnancy, iv had them all.. its the irritating people who feel that because your belly is so huge they have the right to feel it, family ok i can cope with them but strangers on the street and random people that you wouldn't really speak to other than maybe hi in passing it is soo intrusive....
sorry there little rant....

the joys of being public property pregnant

People are just aware this is a big ddeal to you and want to join in - I think the "is happy?" comments are just so you can tell stories about how overjoyed he was.

Aw cut people some slack. No one is trying to cause offence, they are just saying inane things, or sticking their foot in their mouth, and probably think afterwards 'why the fk did I say that ?????'

Maybe you are being a little over sensitive.....

Da Dah - there was another one for your list

I'm at my in laws today. One of their disgusting creepy friends who is hideously over weight, looked at my plate and asked if i was eating for 2. I am 24 weeks with dc2, petite and barely showing. he got a death stare. Then he and another old git started telling me I should play classical
Music (not that awful modern stuff) to the baby as it would make it more intelligent. I explained that with one brother an Oxford graduate and the other an undergrad there, and never a musical note played in my childhood home, it probably wasn't essential. Grrrrrrr .

At 30 weeks I looked around 40 weeks, so I have had to endure the last 8 weeks with people saying how I must be happy to be due any day Now at 38 weeks I am absolutely massive so people keep asking if I am having twins

Loads of people have asked me if we have a name yet for baby girl - my answer is usually "Yes." Followed by a silence. We didn't particularly want to tell everyone a name early in case it got a lukewarm reaction from family, whereas they haven't got a choice but to display enthusiasm if it is announced as a done deal after baby has arrived.

When I was 6 months, my boss told me I was carrying much bigger than a colleague, who was 2 weeks behind me in her dates - that was annoying! And now that I am nearly 8 months and my bump now looks small for dates, people keep telling me it is tiny and is everything okay? Just goes to show you can't win - you're either a whale or your baby isn't growing enough!

When I was 5 months pregnant (and still in size 10 jeans I might add...) I was told 'you don't like pregnant, you look fat' by a virtual stranger. Grrrrr.
The uninvited touching of the bump also got on my nerves a bit so I bought a t shirt that said 'if you're not the man who put this in here, or the person who's going to take it out, don't f**king touch it!'

Grrrr. . . . Someone who I've not spoken to in like 4 or 5 months I saw on the bus and cos I had my jacket undone so bump was on show and she was like woah you've put on weight (btw what what does dp mean?) and daddy to be was on bus with me and he started creasing himself cos when she last saw me I was toned flat stomach and she started feeling my bump up when I explained the reason behind the expansion and people who suppose to be my mates have some sort of bump fever every time I see them it's baby this and baby that and what you going to call s/he? And can I come to your scan and have you started buying baby stuff. Or wow your getting big or the weight ain't half piling on piss off subtely changes subject and smiles no wonder women have a weight complex with comments like that sorry for the rant

Posie also forgot to mention in my rant about the whole you don't look pregnant you look fat comments currently sitting in size 6/8 jeans (well maternity) and 11 weeks gone with bump and bloat. . . Wow do they f**king annoy me

My favourite question was "do you know who the father is? " erm yes, my husband!!! I think it reflected more about him and the kind of girls he knows than me (I hope!!) but as people say, I don't think it was meant to be a nasty comment he just didn't think!

Someone I work with kept saying "if you have the baby now it'll probably be viable". She said this every fucking week until I finally went on mat leave last week.

People also think they're experts on the size of my bump. Same woman as above thinks I'm massive and will never get to term (I'm 37+4), others say "you're really small, is everything ok?

The "was it planned" thing really gets me. I've got no idea why people say this. It seems unbelievably rude! And do they really want to hear all the dirty details?

So many of our friends did ask this I started to wonder whether they thought we shouldn't be having a kid... we're 33 and married, have a house and income...?

RPosieB

'if you're not the man who put this in here, or the person who's going to take it out, don't f**king touch it!'

Love it!!

I also get the "was it planned??" questions. So far I have answered honestly as I think people are just a bit clueless and mean nothing by it, but it's getting a bit old now so I might start answering sarcastically just to amuse myself!

I quite like the attention and questions. Everyone's been so caring and nice, I love it (I've had all those questions and belly touching, love it).

I can relate OP people at my work are exactly the same! I have been told on the same day that I looked small and massive?! I find people at work touching my bump really strange... Even weirder a woman from my office asked if she could see my bump whist trying to lift my top WTAF was not happy and said so- who does that?!

"You must be mad" particularly infuriates me, 13weeks with DC4, I have stopped talking to some insensitive sods I am NOT oversensitive
Also "what does DP think/how did he take it?" Well he asked me to abort, so there's your answer!

I think some people just don't know what to say, perhaps because of personal circumstance, or their own experience (or lack of!). Yesterday when more people got to know at work, one of the girls said: "So when did you conceive?", so I replied "May".

She then said "So what happened in May then?". I obviously looked bewildered, as she clarified: "Was there a special occasion or...?".

I'm not really sure what to make of it! I guess she thinks either that we didn't plan it and got carried away because of some drunken evening. Or that babies are more often conceived around birthdays/anniversaries!

I just replied that "Well it was just when my app told me was the right time"...

I'm only 8 weeks so very few people know. Lots of people know we have fertility problems but I imagine some people will ask if it was planned. I think my reaction will be: ^Was it wanted? Yes. Did we plan it for now? No, we 'planned' it to happen two years ago!

I think there's a combo of people being insensitive and tendency to be very sensitive and protective when pregnant.

I've told people if it had been better 'planned' we'd have an almost 1 yr old by now!

I don't mind the comments on bump big/small as it varies with what I wear. I hate 'you've put on weight' as a comment. No shit Sherlock! I'm growing a small human being in there!

Belly rubbing is alright from friends/family (or ds's reception teachers from last yr as they are lovely and know what trouble we had getting to this point, they live a good feel of the bump!)

Strangers touching me would prob get a punch in the face death state and a few choice words!

I think asking someone if their pregnancy was planned or not is such an unbelievably rude thing to say!