just want to cry now.

[cbd]

i'm sat at home on my own bored and brain going into overdrive and won't switch off. just wish i could curl up into a ball and disappear for a little while now, as i cant seem to find any light at the end of the tunnel right now. been back at hospital today to see my healthy lifestyle midwife, and the meeting didnt go well as i just ended up crying throughout, while we spoke at whats been happening with baby and at home. home life is not good as i'm now have children's services involved again as i'm struggling to cope with life, i've got no income as i'm currently going through an appeal with jobcentre, so no money means no food and nothing for when baby arrives. i'm living off food handouts from the community larder and i'm hating my self for it as i cant work to earn money but jobcentre are refusing me help. i'm now having to wait for a phone call from the supervisior of midwives to phone me as she has now taken on my complaint and file to help sort out a plan of care for me and baby as nothing has been done about it yet. this is 2nd preg and my DS arrived 1 week early and was ast labour so been told chances are this one will be early and even quicker. told DP earlier that I could do with a cuddle as not feeling good, and he's gone and made plans to go friend to a lasses house to watch a movie and have take-out. i only found out when she came round here asking what he would like her to order. so i'm stuck at home bored and feeling like crap.
sorry for the long post just feeling fed up now and what everything to be over.

Keep strong! we are there for you!

Thank you vogue1 it means a lot to me, I'm trying to just take one day at a time for now and see what happens.

Really lovely thing to do mumnos.

Meant to be having a Family Support Worker round this weekend at some point but not heard anything from them yet. so hopefully they will be out tomorrow to see us, she has also put in for a TAC meeting on the 17th this month so need to see if it is happening on that day. Also had a meeting with the crisis team again yesterday, they have decided to close the case on me as I have a FSW now and the local children's centre are helping me.

I have some neutral little baby bits & pieces i can send you if you like? If they aren't suitable i would just ask that eventually they be passed to someone who could use them. If you pm me your address i will send them next week. They aren't girly but they might be of use.xx

thank you tuckingfits, I have sent you a PM

You're most welcome & I've replied!

Thank you so much tuckingfits.

How far along in your pregnancy are you? Only wondering, because if you are due very soon you will be needing nappies and other such essentials before your money situation gets sorted. I'd be happy to post you a packet if you pm me your address.

I don't know if you are religious or not, but even if you are not it may be worth finding your nearest church/temple/mosque (depending on your background) and going to speak with someone there. Not only will they be able to listen to you talk in RL, but often can provide practical help and put you in touch with other resources. I'm a vicar's wife and we would never turn anyone away, whatever their background.

Finally, good luck with baby's kidneys and bladder. When will you next be having tests?

Hi Tallgiraffe, thank you for your message.
I'm 33+3 weeks, but been told to expect this one early as my 4 yr old DS was early, also been told to ask QMC Nottingham and been induced just so i know that i'll definitely be in hospital when baby is born. I don't follow any particular religion I believe something/someone is out there but don't know who as I've had such a bad past throughout life but somehow eventually ended up back on my feet again.
I'm back at QMC on the 27th of this month for my 9th scan to check on fluid around baby, size of bladder and kidneys and general growth.

Not happy with Family Support, was meant to have a worker come round at some point this weekend, was also meant to have come round on Wednesday but not shown at all and no phone call either. not given me much confidence her the workers, was told if i needed any help with DS or the baby to give her a call, but i've got no confidence at the moment that she will be off any help.

cbd i've got some bits together. If you pm your address i can post them in the week,probably thursday.

Try and let it all go over your head. Enjoy being pg, look forward to d-day and cuddles with your LO. It'll be lovely to see DS when he meets his new baby too. This time will be your past one day, things will get easier. On the meantime we're here to listen x

Hi mumnos, thank you I have sent you a PM

been to drs today to talk about some blood results turns out i'm a little bit low on iron and vitamin B12, so been put on iron tablets 3 times a day for 3 months and to have another blood test done in a months time. any ideas what foods i could eat to help boost my levels up again.

Anything green and leafy: cabbage, spinach, brussels, spring greens. I remember something about fresh orange juice helping you absorb more iron too. You'll feel loads better once your iron levels pick up. Be prepared for constipation though (from the iron tablets).

Thank you mumnos for the advice. Looks like a trip to the green grocers tomorrow for lots of fruit and veg.

Exactly what mumnos said, but you can get a lot of those veggies frozen, which will work out cheaper for your purse at the moment.

thank you tallgiraffe, I get the healthy start vouchers as well so try and get a lot of milk and veg with them to help keep cost down.

Afternoon.

We're aware that many MNers may 'know' cbd (the OP), maybe even in real life. And we have absolutely no reason at all to think she is not a genuine poster.

That said, whenever there is a thread asking for money/material help, we do always caution everyone never to give more of themselves to another poster, emotionally or financially, than they can afford to spare.

Congratulations on your pregnancy cbd, and good luck with everything

Hi op, baked beans are great for iron, and they're mega cheap!
Good luck with everything.

Hi Vickles thank you plenty of beans for tea then.

Woop :) had a letter today from QMC they saying that they will see me at 36 weeks and discuss a delivery time. So sounds like i'll soon have a date to meet the LO unless Lo decides to come earlier. Also got my 34 week check up with the Midwife in the morning and then got my Family Support Worker coming round tomorrow as well hopefully if she sticks to her words this time, after not showing up at the weekend like promised.

Hi cbd. Just saw your update. How did you get on yesterday? Good news on the hospital front :)

Hi Tuckingfits,
Yesterday went ok, the appointment with the MW went well everything is good with the baby and bump is growing well, MW also said that the FSW had been in contact with her about the TAC meeting on Monday but MW not sure if she can attend but says she has no concerns about me or baby and she happy/ feels that I have been open and honest with her about my mental health, physical health and also about the past when I was preg with DS and also postnatal with DS.

The FSW actually stuck to her word this time and turned up, she said that on Monday at the TAC meeting they will be opening the case and closing the case straight away about my DS as no-one seems to have any concerns for him (HV hasn't seen him since he was 2 yr old. Couldn't even tell you the HV's name as I've never been able to contact them.) Also the school have no concerns for him, but he only started Wednesday 12th, they say they will keep an eye on him and if any concerns are raised they will pass on the relevant info to the relevant people. The FSW put in for help with school uniform and its been accepted so I got to go and collect that on Monday also DS is getting free school meals and so far has been given hot meals for the 3 days he has attended school.
Also Monday at the TAC they will be opening a case for baby so that everything is in place for support with baby is born. Also been told not to worry about trying to pay for all the baby items i have on the Mothercare baby plan, (been paying for items slowly over the past 7 months) as the FSW can out in for another family fund to help pay for it just so baby has a bed, pushchair and car seat.

I'm also off into town on Monday after the TAC meeting to go see the jobcentre and ask about the appeal as i still haven't heard anything and it's nearly been a month now.

Sorry for the long waffle, but thank you for asking how it all went. I also feel like a little bit off weight has been lifted due to receiving the letter from QMC about a delivery time.

Hi cbd looks like things are finally coming together for you :)