Pros/cons of finding out sex of baby?

[Wiggy29]

We didn't with ds as we had no preference and thought it would be a nice surprise. In reality, when they told us I was so shocked about having given birth/ holding my child, that it didn't even register. It was probably a few months down the line after I'd got used to him as a baby that I really thought about him being a boy.

We're pregnant again with dc2 and again have no preference of the sex. This time though, I'm finding myself leaning towards finding out. The reasons aren't anything major: so when I sort through ds's clothes to see if boy stuff should be left in the loft/ if I see something lovely for boy/ girl in the sales I can buy it (and that has happened a lot)!

What were your reasons for finding out, or not? Ds is 7& would also really like to know so he can 'get his head used to it' (he'd prefer a boy but is just so excited I doubt he'll be fussed). Dp said he'd probs rather not but is also unsure. Thoughts?

We found out with our first, it was great to have something to look forward to midway through the pregnancy, it was also really good for bonding with 'him' before he was born. Although the reality of our son was beyond anything we could have imagined!

Now expecting dc2 and will definitely find out again. No delayed gratification in this house! :)

I'm with squidkid and citizenoscar on this one. It's just a little baby and I really dislike the idea of its identity getting defined by its gender when it's still so tiny.

I'd assumed before I was pregnant that the pink/blue thing would be a minority, but given the number of comments of it being easier to plan, buy clothes, paint nursery, not wanting to only dress it in cream etc I don't think it is. Also shops divide everything, even newborn, to baby boy or baby girl so even what I consider to be suitable for both it's assigned to one or the other.

so for me personally I don't want to find out. DP does though and I was resisting. He said something recently though about not feeling very connected to the baby and knowing would help for him. I suppose for us, we can't stop being aware of what's happening and I was wondering if would be good to find out for that reason. Still got a few weeks to decide and if we did it'd have to be on the condition we don't let anyone else know.

I felt nothing when I found out at DS1's both that he was a boy. I was exhausted, battered and completely out of it. Certainly no magical moment. I think I would have found it far more exciting and magical had I found out at a scan.

Horses for courses. There is no right and wrong.

DS1's birth

I'm definitely going to find out and have no problem with dressing boys in blue and girls in pink, it'd be hard not too judging by what's in the shops plus I'd be a bit miffed if someone peered in the pram and said 'what a handsome boy' if it was a girl, hehe.

It's a lovely suprise whether it's at 20 or 40 weeks and for me the earlier the better, hubby & I both want to get everything ready, I read somewhere about a lady who didn't find out the sex and was looking forward to shopping with her new baby but for me I can't imagine anything worse, I want to be at home taking it all in, recovering and bonding, not having to get ready and traipse around mothercare.

I loved the fact that I didn't know - that moment when the midwife said 'you've got a lovely little girl' was the most miraculous of my life. And I know it would still have been miraculous if I'd known what she would be beforehand, but for me it really added to the magic of it. It's an opening presents early thing for me too!
Agree that I don't like it when I know what other people are having either - it spoils the announcement a bit if you know half the news in advance...(not that I expect other people not to find out for my benefit, I'm not that much of a megalomaniac, just personal preference!).

I didnt feel any need to know with dd, but can understand why people find out early.

I guess, for me, once they are here, it is certain - before that, the 20wk gender info is not always 100%.