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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

All too stressful - all a bit much

76 replies

desperatehousewife · 12/03/2006 17:03

I had a stillbirth at the end of November (at 25 weeks) the post mortem showed that there was absolutely no reason for it, which means that I can go on and have another child if I want.

I've always wanted a second child (DS is 3.8) and want to do it sooner rather than later for all sorts of reasons.

Was quite shocked to discover I was pregnant 6 weeks ago, only 3 months after my bad experience. Have been experiencing a whole range of strong emotions since.

Since Tuesday night I started bleeding a little, and since then it's been on and off. Because of the stress of my last pregnancy I was advised to go and have a scan last week and they can see what they think is an empty sac. This either means miscarriage, blighted ovum or that it's just too early to see a fetal pole. Have another scan at the end of this next week to see if there is a baby there or not.

I am expecting the worst because i have to. I've had lower back ache, feeling sick, now have hideous cold and feel bloody miserable.

Totally lost it last night as it would have been the due date of my last baby. Just can't quite believe that this could happen and my confidence is feeling at rock bottom. Not sure I can put myself or my family through this again. (what i mean is going through another pregnancy and the fear of losing the baby).

sorry, just needed to offload.

OP posts:
TearsBeforeBedtime · 12/03/2006 18:41

virtually the same scenario happened when I was PG with DS that Pucca has described just now.

Original poster
desperatehousewife · 12/03/2006 18:43

i don't think there is any doubt about my dates unfortunately! She didn't mention anything other than she thought she could see a sack, but with nothing in it. Sad. It just doesn't feel right to be bleeding on and off for this long. I didn't bleed a single bit with my ds1. My last pregnancy i did bleed for 4 days at this time too, and I can only compare this to my last experience which ended horribly.

OP posts:
pucca · 12/03/2006 18:46
Sad

Still try and hold on to a glimmer of hope though, i knew what day i concieved this time and was totally confused and thinking the worst when they didnt see HB, then at 12 week scan they put me back to original date...very odd! but it could be similar thing for you.

I would ask for hormone level to be checked tomorrow though.

Thikning of you.xxxxxx

Original poster
desperatehousewife · 12/03/2006 18:48

thanks pucca.

it's all such a bloody pain in the arse isn't it. Is it ever simple and stress free?

OP posts:
pucca · 12/03/2006 18:51

I do really feel for you, life is very unfair and you so deserve everything to go right for you, i really hope all is well, will cross everything for you.

xxx

pucca · 12/03/2006 18:55

I have to add...with them knowing your history i cannot believe they have left you in limbo like this Angry.

Also a friend of mine went through very similar circumstances to you, she has a ds of almost 4, got pg and had a stillbirth @ 23 weeks ( a little girl) there was also no known reason why it happened, she got pg about 6 mth after and had a very healthy little boy...so there is hope, although i know atm you can't see any.

Original poster
desperatehousewife · 12/03/2006 18:56

thanks Smile

OP posts:
fastasleep · 12/03/2006 19:02

Oh DHW Sad I'm crossing everything too! Don't you let those doctors faff you around!

anchovies · 12/03/2006 19:06

Oh DHW I am so sorry to hear you're having such a hard time. I will be thinking about you this week xxx

Original poster
desperatehousewife · 12/03/2006 19:29

oh thanks anchovies. hope you are doing well! x

OP posts:
emkana · 12/03/2006 19:55

Sorry to read about your problems.

Hope it all turns out okay. I know very well what you mean by

"It's just so frustating that there's nothing anyone can say - because of course what I want someone to say is "don't worry, it WILL all be alright" but no one can say that and it's pants!"

cori · 12/03/2006 20:17

DHW, I think 5.5 weeks would be to early for them to see anything. I was told the earliest they could see HB is at 6 weeks.

foundintranslation · 12/03/2006 20:39

dhw, agree with cori, it could have been too early. Am so hoping the next scan brings good news.

milward · 12/03/2006 20:44

dhw - sorry to hear what you're going through. Sending you support xxx

Original poster
desperatehousewife · 13/03/2006 08:48

just phoned early preg unit and they said there was no point in taking blood test now as it would have altered so much since last thursday anyway that they woulnd't have any more accurate picture by doing so.

She did say that my hormone level was high enough though last week for them not to be worried and the next step for them with a case like mine is another scan (which is on thursday).

So I'm supposed to not worry I guess. Just doesn't feel right to be bleeding for a whole week.

Oh well!

OP posts:
spub · 13/03/2006 10:56

DHW - you have had such a rotten time and it's such a shame that what should be a happy time is also being understandably blighted by worry and uncertainty.
I know that Thursday must feel like a lifetime away. Really hope that you get good news on Thursday. Meantime take good care. Fingers crossed.

Original poster
desperatehousewife · 13/03/2006 11:08

thanks for kind words spub
x

OP posts:
spinach · 13/03/2006 14:12

hi dhw, i hope you're okay, i think your epu are being very unhelpful. they may feel fine about it all but the point is you need reassurance and thats not unreasonable. it wouldnt take too long for them to do your bloods again. take care. xxx

Marina · 13/03/2006 23:09

Oh, no. I spotted an exchange between you and the Custess on a totally different thread and went and searched you because it had me concerned. I had what I considered to be a point of no return bleed at six weeks with dd, DHW - and spotted on and off with her to 20 weeks. Not what I needed and not like either two previous pregnancies. All I can say is that every pregnancy is different and that bleeding doesn't necessarily mean a baby in jeopardy.
I know nothing else will help much at this worrying time but am thinking of you with might and main and hoping for the best M XXX

SorenLorensen · 13/03/2006 23:26

dhw, I've only just seen this - I am so sorry you're going through this after the awful time you've had. I can't say a thing to help other than I'm thinking of you and hoping things will be OK this time.

TearsBeforeBedtime · 13/03/2006 23:31

Sorry that the EPU doesn't sound to have reassured you. I guess all you can do is try and make the time go as quickly as possible until the scan on Thursday.

oops · 13/03/2006 23:33

i bled alot with ds1- pretty much all the way thru the 1st trimester
i also had an early scan where they saw noothing.. and said i'd prob miscarried.
but they took bts every 48hrs and they had doubled!
i think 1 bt is next to useless tbh...try the ectpoic website for more advice, but iirc the bts have to be done over 48hrs... i'd phone tommorrow and get some more done-- it will be just a question of maths i am sure.
i hope you feel better, i really sympatjhise- not knowing is terrible isn't it?
[[[[[hugs]]]]]]

Original poster
desperatehousewife · 14/03/2006 09:56

had accupuncture yesterday morning and told her about the bleeding. She said if it's a miscarriage there's obviously nothing that can be done, but if it's just normal bleeding then she can try and stop it. Well 3 hours after accupuncture bleeding all stopped. Still haven't had any over night or this morning. How weird is that?!

OP posts:
oops · 14/03/2006 10:04
Smile hope you have a calm day and you feel better
Original poster
desperatehousewife · 14/03/2006 11:53

feeling very calm thank you...it's a rather nice and unusual feeling these days! Making the most of it...

OP posts: