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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Just got to my antenatal classes &

30 replies

Pickles77 · 13/08/2012 18:33

It's all couple. And I'm all alone :( feel ridiculously stupid. They're all staring at me. I didn't want to come any way :(

OP posts:

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EmpireBiscuit · 13/08/2012 18:41

Don't be a daftie - no one is staring and if they are just give them a big smile!

elizaregina · 13/08/2012 18:43

at mine sometimes i went with DH and so did others but most time i was alone....they may have gone as first one...next week could be different - also people came and went.

Original poster

Pickles77 · 13/08/2012 18:44

Feel like everyone stares at my hands . However I once got told if you feel you look a twat, you look a twat. Maybe this applies now

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LackingNameChangeInspiration · 13/08/2012 18:46

they're all staring at you because you just walked in, and they're hoping you're friendly! you didn't walk back in time

GlaikitFizzog · 13/08/2012 18:46

My classes were women only and they did separate dads to be classes. I think to avoid this exact situation. Don't worry about it I'm sure you don't look like a twat, just a mum to be wanting to learn.

Original poster

Pickles77 · 13/08/2012 18:47

Hopefully I hate social situations

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MoaningMingeWhingesAgain · 13/08/2012 18:48

I went on mine by myself, everyone else was couples. It was a much better idea than taking DH with me

It's fine, really.

SquishyCinnamonSwirls · 13/08/2012 18:48

Just smile and be friendly, they're probably not staring at you at all. :)

nm123 · 13/08/2012 18:48

Ahh don't worry - the blokes are all sitting there wishing they could be somewhere else and it's likely a few will drop out as the weeks go by. In any case, mostly you'll become friendly with the women anyway.

StaceymReadyForNumber3 · 13/08/2012 18:50

Of I bothered going this time it would be alone, DH would be awful in that situation!

Don't panic they don't care, just smile and be friendly! Have fun!

panicnotanymore · 13/08/2012 18:53

Everyone in that room will have been worried about making a good impression themselves. They would have looked at you to smile, and try and make friends.

Longtalljosie · 13/08/2012 18:53

Are you a single mum? Let's be honest, they're probably trying to suss out whether you are one or not. Not that they will think anything of it, they're just curious. Find some way of slipping it into the conversation and everyone can move on...

LackingNameChangeInspiration · 13/08/2012 18:55

I wouldn't be trying to figure out if she was a single mum, I'ld be trying to figure out if she was likely to speak to me or if she was one of the "in-get the info-get out not interested in making friends" types

Weekipper · 13/08/2012 19:00

I went to all of mine alone as DH was working 55miles away. It was fine. As others say just smile and 'fake it till you make it'

Ohhelpohnoitsa · 13/08/2012 19:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LackingNameChangeInspiration · 13/08/2012 19:03

2nd timers go alone because babysitters are expensive, If I go this time it'll be alone because I'm not giving up my babysitting tokens on antenatal classes!

Original poster

Pickles77 · 13/08/2012 19:58

The blokes look uncomfortable. I said my partner was working as I was . Some arrogant man keeps pushing daddy around the room though!

OP posts:

Badgerina · 13/08/2012 20:42

Oh I really feel for you These things are hard enough, but being on your own, and feeling "different" makes it worse doesn't it?

Don't you think though, that this is something you will have to learn to deal with? You sound a little insecure about being a single mum (which is totally understandable) and I think the awkward social situation that a first antenatal class has thrown at you, is causing you to have a bit of a wobble.

But, you ARE a single mum (IIRC!) and there is NOTHING wrong with that. You're brave and wonderful and have every right to be at your class as everyone else.

Badgerina · 13/08/2012 20:44

Sorry forgot to add - I felt similarly to you at EVERY baby-related thing I went to. Not because I was a single mum (that came later), but because I was in such an unhappy relationship at the time. You have my sympathy x

FluffyJawsOfDoom · 13/08/2012 20:46

I'll probably be doing a fair few alone as Dh is a shift worker - he's wangled the first one off though - I bet it's really common, don't feel embarrassed! :)

MoaningMingeWhingesAgain · 13/08/2012 20:48

Nobody asked me why DH wasn't there. I would have had to say it was because he hates anything like that and has poor social skills He is great at work, or in a pub, but he cannot do smalltalk/chitchat at all.

Original poster

Pickles77 · 13/08/2012 20:51

Oh yes I'm very insecure but I know I need to go and do it, I'll be a lot more uncomfortable than this in the future I think.
Thank you for everyone's support

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BikeMedalsRunningMedals · 13/08/2012 20:52

We had a single mum, a lady who worked back to back shifts with her DH and a girl who was having her first baby, but her husband's fourth. They were usually alone. In fact, the single mum always. It's no biggie, the thing that matters now is that you'll all have children the same age.

DeathMetalMum · 13/08/2012 20:56

Are you going to have a birthing partner? Maybe next time they could go with you if you are having one. The first week I went with df, but there were women alone and also one whose mum has accompanied her, the second week df managed to get out of it as he didnt enjoy it and my mum came with me instead. At least then there is someone else there that you know.

ItsMyLastOne · 13/08/2012 21:53

How many classes are there? We only had 2 so any little white lies, like where an OH was, wouldn't have been found out!

My sister (a single mum) went to hers alone. There was another woman there alone. No one cared who each other was or whether they had an OH, they were all there for the same reasons.

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