Pregnant Emetophobe - any other out there??

[Fletch1]

Hi everyone
I've just found out I'm pregnant with my second,already have a DD who is 4. I want to be very excited but unfortunately I suffer from extremem emetophobia so I am more terrified of morning sickness than anything else.

I think I am about 6 weeks (not been to Dr yet to confirm) and so far have been fine. I didn't suffer with DD1 so hoping to be the same this time around. I'm doing all the same things I done first time, travel bands, eating crackers before getting out of bed, eating avery couple of hours and sticking to bland foods.

Would love to hear from anyone else who is going through the same thing or who has been through it.

Hello! Fellow emetephobe here :)

Have suffered from this since I was very young. First time pregnant and I've had bad nausea since week 4 :( I'm now 7 weeks.

I've been doing all the same and lots of ginger tea, ice lollies etc. I do use buccastem when it's very bad otherwise I have bad panic attacks. Do you get them?

Yeah me too. If anyone is sick I have a panic attack. And I am literally never sick myself ordinarily as I seem to have been blessed (touch wood) with a cast iron stomach.
I was nauseous for the first three months with my first, and the same again now, but haven't been sick. I've actually found that whilst I feel worse this time, I have less time to dwell on it as I'm running round after DS the whole time.
It's a means to an end is what I keep telling myself!!

I'm worried my anxiety will affect the baby. I try and stay calm but it's really difficult when I'm nauseous. I burn oils, take a bath, distraction, breathing etc but when I'm at work it's hard to using coping strategies.

Hi to both of you!
So glad to hear it's not just me.

chips what are buccastem? I have panic attacks too, especially when I feel nauseous or if someone mentions tummy bugs etc.

I've had it for as long as I can remember and used to have very extreme panic attacks. I've been visiting a kinesiologist since I fell pregnant with my daughter 5 years ago (she's now 4) and she has changed my life! While I still struggle everyday and I think about it 80% of the time, I now have coping mechanisms to help me deal with certain situations.

Our daughter was not planned and we didn't realise I was pregnant until about 8 weeks which at the time was a blessing as I was so scared of getting pregnant and having mornig sickness. Luckily I was fine anyway.

I'm not really sure how I'm feeling this time around to be honest. I've had a few queasy moments which seem to be worse at night time. I have a plan though! I have a calendar and every day I get through where I am not ill, I give myself a smiley face. I have convinced myself that as soon as I reach the 12 week point I will be fine! Crazy I know but it's how I get myself through each day.

I've got the doctor next week and not sure whether to ask for anti-emetics just in case or if that would be tempting fate - plus I have found that some doctors do not take me seriously and laugh me off :( Had this problem with a midwife first time around which did not ease my anxities at all.

When are you both due?

Chips do you find you worry more when you are at work as if it happens everyone will see you panicking? That's what I'm like.
I'm sure your anxiety will not affect the baby. When I was pregnant with dd I was an absolute mess. I was verging on being anorexic, iron levels very low and had panic attacks all the time. I had a very healthy, happy 8lb 1oz baby!
Have you tried alternative therapies? My Dr sent me for cbt which I found no help at all but kinesiology has been a god send for me.

Hi Fletch

I'm 7+2 due Christmas Eve! When's your edd?

I panic if I feel nauseous wherever I am really. But I panic about going into work an I'll feel ill and people will see, definitely. I work in a cafe too :( it's very busy and draining.

Buccastem is an anti nausea and anti vom medicine you can buy wihtout prescription so I keep those for emergencies. I would tell your dr you're very sick just so they give you a pack, it helps with the nausea and anxiety.

I seem to be feeling sick more in the afternoon/eve now whereas at 4-6 weeks it was morning.

I've had some CBT and it helped a bit as she used a lot of aversion techniques whereby I had to look at pictures that got worse and worse, I had to look at them until I didn't feel anxious and was bored. Was good. I'm going to look up that kinesiology! Never heard of it.

I've downloaded the app Nevasic on my iPhone which is meant to be good for nausea.

So glad to hear your dd was perfect after all the anxiety :)

I have anxiety for other reasons too and had panic attacks during my pregnancy last time, DS was well over 9lbs and is so laid back he's horizontal. Not like his mother! I suffered from PND after last time and have CbT since then which helps all round for me with all my anxieties! I can't recommend it highly enough for learning to cope and enjoy life with a phobia like this.

I believe mine started when my parents separated and my abusive stepdad moved in aged 2 :( the focus was just on sick I guess. My CBT therapist said it's a result of PTSD.

grand it's good to hear your ds is happy too, hope mine doesn't get my anxiety! Glad your CBT is helping you.

Hi Fletch!

I'm an emetophobic too, have been for many years, and I was unlucky enough to suffer severe sickness with my ds (would usually v* between 3 and 6 times daily) and felt nauseous until week 20. And, I actually did cope pretty well, mainly cos you just don't have any other choice! After a few weeks of it, I just got on with it, and you would too, although not having suffered in your first pregnancy means its more likely that you would be ok in this one too. Having emet does make it harder to cope when your dc is ill, but for some reason when ds is sick although I do panic and usually have to take some diazepam, I get through it simply cos he is my little son and I love him. Best of luck to you :)

Hi VickyandAlistair
So good to hear from someone who has had to go through it - everyone tells me I would cope better than I think but I just don't believe it myself. I'm sure it will be different if it were to happen.

I have been extremely lucky with my DD - she is 4 and has only every been a little sick a couple of times. My DH was there to deal with it as I went into complete panic mode :(

chipsnadmushypeas I'm not sure when my edd is yet. I've not been to Dr, got appointment next week. From looking onthe internet it is anytime between the 31st December and the 5th Jan! My cycle is not regular so kind of difficult to tell.
It sounds like you have had a very hard life - I would definitely recommend kinesiology, could possibly help you with your issues from your past too.

TheGrandOldDuke I'm never ill either - but I've read that emetophobes rarely are as you train your body not to be and get very good at avoiding any situation that may cause you to be. I don't know if that is a good thing or not! Sometimes I wonder if I had been ill more often would I maybe not have this phobia??

sounds like CBT has worked for most people, I think perhaps the therapist I saw was just not very good! she was s tudent and as it was through NHS I only got 10 sessions. It was fairly easy to work out what to say to make her think I was getting better. Also, she seemed to focus on other areas that stressed me as a result of my phobia ie usning lifts, going out for meals etc and ignored the real problem. Maybe one dat I'll try it again but for now I wouldn't be without Caroline (my kinesiologist) :)

Hypnosis seems to be what is working for me at the moment. I went to see a lady, Ursula James www.ursulajames.com/ 3 weeks ago and underwent hypnosis, I've also been listening to her CD every night before I fall asleep. And I dont know whether it really is working, or whether its a mind over matter thing, but I really do feel calmer and happier, and no where near as anxious! I've also done exposure which I found worked, but only as long as you keep exposing yourself. Once the therapy stopped, the phobia came back. The is a cure for you, you probably just need to try some different techniques to see what works for you :)

Me too!

My EDD is 4 December... I have been wearing sea-bands religiously. I've also been carrying a sick bag everywhere I go. I've not had to use it but it calms me down knowing that if I am sick I can at least do it tidily

I tried CBT when I was about 18 but didn't find it useful. I'm going to look into kinesiology though!

Hey Superunknown welcome! I always have a plastic bag with me too. We should all stick together as most are due in december too :)

Had a little anxiety this morning when the shop was very busy, it's so horrible as I have no escape as I'm alone so can't exactly tell people to leave!

chipsandmushypeas I find when I'm panicky if I take a moment to concentrate on my breathing and count my breaths in and out it helps to calm me down. It must be really diffuclut being on your own though in the shop :( Just keep congratulating yourself everytime you get through a day (I have a chart that I'm putting smiley faces on) and before you know it the dreaded first 3 months will be over and it will be plain sailing from there!

Word of warning for any first time mums out there - I started attending the ante-natal classes run by the NHS and after the first never went back. I had to listen to a midwife telling me I was going to be ill at every stage of labour. I came out of the class in a complete panic and cried all the way home. At that point my DH (Who is an absolutely amazing man!) banned me from going to any other classes or from reading any birth stories. I'm glad he did because I was not ill, and at no point felt ill during the whole labour (I was in labour for around 3days!). I didn't take gas and air as I was worried that would make me ill. I hired a tens machine, which I found was enough for me. Then I had an epidural as there were a few complications towards the end.
Just wanted to put your minds to rest that it doesn't happen to everyone!

Thank you Fletch I like the chart idea. I do take things one day at a time. The weeks seem to be going so fast!

Thanks for the warning. I've read so much that women v during labour, I've already decided I don't want gas and air for the same reason! I'm glad you were ok. I hope I will too x

I think everyone is so obsessed with telling you the 'gory details'. I was so scared about labour but even although I had a long one, it was nowhere near as bad as anyone made out. People seem to like making htings sound a LOT more dramatic than theyactually are!

The midwife did keep trying to convince me to take gas and air and I kept politely refusing. She asked me one too many times however and I remember turning to my DH and saying 'Tell her I don't want any f***g gas and air thank you'.

If you get a tens machine be careful though. I thought i was having the worst contraction ever (they's been like bad period cramps) until I realised that I was lying on my controller and had somehow pushed it to top level and pressed boost! It was promplty removed and thrown at my DH :)

brilliant! I'm so excited! It's a right of passage I guess. I hope I can have a vaginal birth

Me too, have emetophobia and just found out am pregnant at age 40!! DD is 12 and DS is 10 and I thought I'd put days of worrying about sickness behind me but hey ho life is far from simple.

I am due January 2013 and only 3 weeks, very tired but not feeling sick as yet although did with other 2!!

Hi pinklaydee
Congratulations! Wow, that's a big age gap - at least they will be able to help you out :)

chips I was terrified at the thought of a section - don't like the idea of being open when I'm still awake! My friend had one and said she felt sick when she was being stitched up so that of course has put me off too :(

I had a really bad day yesterday. Was fine in the morning but felt really nauseous and had a sore tummy last night. All I wanted was to cuddle my hot water bottle (always makes my tummy feel better) but of course I couldn't. To top it off, the nursery are having a bake sale today so I had to stand and make cupcakes and a traybake whilst feeling rotten.

Anyway, feeling back on form today so hopefully just a blip.

Does anyone have their scan dates yet? I can't wait to go for mine so I can start telling everyone! Especially my DD who has been asking for the last 2 years for a baby sister :)

Morning :)

Sorry you had a bad day yesterdays, Fletch but glad you're having a better one today, it's Friday! :)

I'm feeling better than yesterday, not on my own today. I know how you feel fletch, I work in a cafe so make bacon butties, beans, eggs and sandwiches with goats cheese etc :(

I usually start feeling ill in the afternoon/ evening now which I hate as I have to force myself to eat.

I haven't got my scan date yet or even a mw appt! I've booked a private scan for next Friday though so I'll be 8+4

Ooh chips that's exciting! It makes it all real when you see baby on the screen.

I've not even been to the Dr yet! Going on Tuesday so I guess that will start the ball rolling in terms of mw appointments and scans.

I know! Can't wait. I went to drs at 5+5 I think and haven't even got a letter yet. I guess I guess I won't see much at 8+4 but just to know it's ok will be great, my DP is very nervous x

You will need to let us know how it goes on Friday chips

Well what a rotten weekend I have had :( Been feeling really yuck all weekend and it's really getting me down. I'm just praying that this is a blip and I'm not going to feel like this for the next 6-9 weeks :(
I'm trying really hard to keep eating small amounts often but I'm struggling - food just tastes wrong. I don't have the best relationship with food as it is so this is really testing me.
I'm wearing my sea bands constantly (will this make them not work??), I'm drinking peppermint tea all the time and I'm living on crackers and bland food like toast. My mouth feels like it's got a thick coating on it no matter how much I brush my teeth and everything tastes and feels like I'm eating gloop.
Does anyone have any suggestions on anything else I can try? I'm getting desperate, I'm so scared of being ill :(

Jx

Hi Fletch so sorry you're feeling rotten. I felt like that at 6-7 weeks exactly. It was horrible. Reflexology really helped me with nausea, acupuncture is meant to be very good too.

Stick to bland food and just eat whatever you fancy, although I didn't fancy anything! I'm 8 weeks now and it's eased up a bit to the point where I can think about what I want for dinner without gagging.

Here's some things that helped me:

Hot water with lemon when I didn't fancy any tea
Hot water with chopped ginger
Jacket potatoes for dinner/lunch
Smelling oilbas oil on a tissue all day if I felt sick (or find a smell you like)
Breathing techniques
Burning lemon oil

I'll post more If I think of anything else. Stay positive and try and not think about how you're feeling x