So I had an antenatal visit from a Health Visitor today.

[openerofjars]

She advised me to bf, not to smoke, to make sure I get a Red Book from the MW and to get something for DC2 to sleep in after the birth.

I'm booked in for a home birth but she kept telling me about the tests etc that DC2 would have to have before we would be allowed to leave hospital and asked me if I had a car seat to take him or her home in.

She also kept referring to DS as "your little girl".

She had my notes right there in her hand.

I am not filled with confidence in her, to be frank.

Has anyone else had an interesting antenatal visit from the HV team?

god some of them are incompetent aren't they?

i haven't seen one for years thank the lord. i just ignored mine til she went awayh

Ha! I'm dubious from stories I've heard and have my antenatal visit next week too. Was wondering what happened if you just ignored them - worried they might send social services round! I'm not great at receiving unsolicited advice to be honest. Does anyone know how often they come once you've given birth? Someone told me it was every day for 10 days?! Surely not!

I think mine came three times but only for 15 mins or so a time. I just answered all their questions, smiled sweetly and off they went

No, the HVs only come round (here, anyway) once the MW has discharged you & the baby, at about 2 weeks.

I am not waiting in for hours for them this time and fully intend on taking DC2 to any clinics going.

I don't like advice either.

My HV was very good. I think, from stories on here and from friends, that she is in the minority.

One friend had a 6lb 5oz baby, and at 4 weeks the baby was feeding every 3 hours, she was told to let her baby cry for an extra hour so she only had to feed her every four hours! I still cannot fathom why . The baby was really chilled out and mum was doing great with 3 hour feeds.

We didn't get antenatal visits, just postnatal ones. She used to stomp into the living room with her shoes on and write goodness knows what it her little notebook.

I was a crying mess one visit and even though she always used to harp on about how mental health was her most important issue, I didn't see her for another 7 months at the one year check. I was fine but, for all she knew, I could have been in the pits of PND for all that time.

I think her main role was box ticking.

I got told last time that I was basically too middle class for PND and that I wasn't really feeling that bad, I just needed to go to some coffee mornings and get a grip. Not in so many words, but that was the sentiment.

no they won't contact SS

the health visitor service is there if you want it, but it's not compulsory. you don't ever have to see one if you don't want to

you'll normally be under midwife care for 10 days after you come home from hospital, and after that it passes to the health visitors, but like i say you don't have to see them if you don't want to

Runlolarun - you will be visited at first by the community midwife. She has a legal duty to attend women who have given birth and can visit for up to 28 days. In practice they will come the day after you get home and then go from there. they may come often if you need support. If you and baby are well they will come less often and then hand you over to the HV service. Unlike the midwife you do not have to let the HV in or go and see them. Some are lovely and helpful. Some aren't. Best to wait and see what you get.

Mine was lovely.

A very sensible woman who made you feel you were doing brilliant.
Everyone in our area loved her.
She made our Dr's refer us to a consultant when I was convinced something was wrong with DS2. She backed me and fought for me when I was too tired to do so.

Never had an ante-natal visit though.

I started my HV training today

but from a personal pov, like everything some are excellent and some are dreadful! They are all trained nurses or midwives, and will probably have done a 3year diploma or degree followed by a further year HV post grad training. They are not just nosey busybodies who come round to see if youve hoovered.

You can choose not to see your HV regularly but they are required to do developmental checks on children up to five years of age afaik (so far)

Up to 2 years of age here, according to the rather vague lady I saw today.

Good luck, mosschops: I am sure you will raise the bar in your local area!

My first HV who visited/I saw for 8 months was incredibly supportive and knowledgeable. He was re-assuring and if he wasn't sure of any answer, he'd do a bit of research and then phone me back immediately. Couldn't rate him highly enough and couldn't understand why so many people moaned about their HVs or had obviously useless, contradictory or sometimes dangerous advice...

...then I moved and met my new HV. She's absolutely awful. No idea about current medicine or pediatrics, or in fact anything that she can't read in her little red book. She's also insulting. I took my DS to clinic the other week to be weighed and asked if he could also be measured as he's not been growing much in length over the last few months. Rather than even checking or advising me to go see the GP, she flatly said: "He's had his one year check. We don't measure height/length etc until they get to 2 and a half years old." .

I'm off to see the Practice Nurse instead. She's much more supportive and knowledgeable.

If any of you end up with a crap HV, but feel you want some advice/support, I'd go see your GP or Practice Nurse.

I only wish I could have continued with my old HV, or that he trained others.

I'm as happy to bash HV's as the next person

But what's wrong with breastfeeding and not smoking? [confusing]

Would she have done that if it was a consultant appointment and the doctor was running late?
Why is there such feeling against HVs?
I appreciate that some are crap, but so are some doctors/midwives/nurses, we dont imagine theyre all the same

Had my antenatal HV last week and was worried about it because of all the horror stories i hear about the bad ones that come out.

She was great and was the first person i've seen throughout the whole of my pregnany who, when i said i want to breastfeed, said that that's great, but that if it isn't for me then not to feel bad and that the main thing is that i'm happy because if i'm happy, baby is happy. Normally everyone is just so happy that i want to breastfeed because as far as they're concerned formula is wrong. She's also going to put me on to some local groups once my little boy arrives (hopefully next week! :o$) as I don't have any friends my age that have children (i'm 27 and pregnant with my first) and all my good friends live all over the country so they're not close by. I'm looking forward to having her help once my little boy gets here.

My midwife on the other hand, is a different matter. Unfriendly and doesn't seem to know what she's talking about! Will definitely be going somewhere else for the next baby!

Interesting! I didnt know health visitors did antenatal too. When does that happen? Do they just appear on a doorstep unannounced or do rhey schedule a time to come by? If people work during the day i would think that dropping by during the day would be doomed to failure....

@WinterMymble - Mine called me at about 34 weeks to book a date for when I was on maternity leave, but I didn't start maternity leave until 37 and a half weeks (which made her quite nervous lol!) so she arranged to come once i'd finished last week and was nice enough to come at the time she said too so i wasn't waiting in a whole afternoon for her.

I think they just come to tell you a bit about what they do and what to expect and the support they can offer you, though when my midwife told me she would be contacting me she did say that they're so busy that they don't always get to do the antenatal visits but that they try to if they can.

Hope that helps :)

I don't think they do ante natal HV visits in my area. Whatever happens though I am really really hoping the HV I had with dd has moved elsewhere or better still gone to stack baked bean tins in a supermarket

She was horrendous. On her one and only visit when dd was 2 weeks she was 2 hours late, had long purple false nails, asked to watch me make up a bottle (and seemed confused when I had no idea because I was breastfeeding) and warned me against putting bleach in the toilet in case dd dipped her hand in and hurt herself on it (not likely at 2 weeks). Clinics were terrible, she gave me no advice about DD's reflux despite constant requests from me - apparently since dd was growing well so several bouts of projectile vomiting everyday was irrelevent.

I could go on and on and on.

My midwife on the other hand was absolutely lovely with DD and thankfully have the same one again this time :)

Winter from my experience they do antenatal visits on a sample of women, don't think it's all women.

Funny experience I had was thus: I gave birth to my PFB son 2 years ago, he was born exactly one week early and as is standard in my area (Northern Ireland) the community MW came to visit our house for 10 days after we were discharged from hospital.

One day my house phone rings and it's some women I've never heard of in my life telling me she's going to be my HV when my baby is born and asking me when was suitable for her to come out to do an ante-natal visit prior to my due date. I didn't even know such visits existed, but I had been told in hospital that a HV would be coming out once the 10 days of MW visits stopped.

I sort of giggled and told this very polite and eager sounding woman that actually DS had already been born and was 6 days old and currently I was breastfeeding him and balancing the phone in the other hand! She was more mortified than I was, I was especially because in our local health centre the MWs and HVs share office space so clearly info-sharing wasn't their strong point.

I find the best thing to do with the less than helpful HV's is to tell them what they want to hear .

I have had a twatty one who told me DC3 was overweight and would be needing to go on a diet (at about 12 months old ), she was a stand in for my normal HV whom had seen DC3 from birth and had always reassured me despite his hefty weight (he had his own line ABOVE the 99.9th centile) his height was also on the 99.9th centile and therefore he was perfectly in proportion and there was nothing to worry about. I complained about the stand in to my normal HV who told me to ignore her-and that DC3 presented her with no concerns whatsoever. DC3 is now 2.4 and is still tall and has a hefty chest but has not an ounce of fat on him anywhere.

I have a lovely HV, she's very supportive and gives good advice.

The only gripe that I have with her is that she knows that I am friends with another patient (?) of hers. I went to the doctors for this HV to give my DD2 her jabs and my friend was quite newly pregnant, at that time. When I walked into the appointment my HV said, "ooh, X is pregnant isn't she?" which I thought was a bit unprofessional. My friend may not have announced it for all she knew!

The child health surveillance scheme is optional. That means the HV and developmental checks.

I'll be opting out, thank you very much! Its my second child, I never had a need with one the first time round and found it utterly pointless.

If there is a problem with my child I will go to the GP for a relevant referral/treatment, or reassurance if there isn't a problem.