So I had an antenatal visit from a Health Visitor today.

[openerofjars]

She advised me to bf, not to smoke, to make sure I get a Red Book from the MW and to get something for DC2 to sleep in after the birth.

I'm booked in for a home birth but she kept telling me about the tests etc that DC2 would have to have before we would be allowed to leave hospital and asked me if I had a car seat to take him or her home in.

She also kept referring to DS as "your little girl".

She had my notes right there in her hand.

I am not filled with confidence in her, to be frank.

Has anyone else had an interesting antenatal visit from the HV team?

I am very lucky and our health visitor is great, my friend still consults her for advice on her 12 year old. I have more confidence in her than my gp, I took ds2 to see her with a manky toe last week that they wouldn't treat, she prescribed cream and it was better in a couple of days.

The breastfeeding/no smoking bit was in the bleedin' obvious category, Agnes : she did ask me if we smoked in the house as well. Neither DH or myself have smoked in years and the house smells of freesias and apple blossom fine, okay, it smells of DH's socks, shepherd's pie and Haribo . We have even replaced curtains, carpets and sofa covers since any indoor smoking took place.

I'm sorry, I'm not gearing up to bash all HVs ever but I am 35 weeks pg with DC2, a leetle hormonal & grumpy and don't like someone making me stay in all morning just so they can tick boxes without even reading my notes/using any common sense.

Then I had to go and renew my photocard for my driving licence at the Post Office. Pass the chocolate.

Ow the dreaded HV they do a visit a few wk before your due (booking in visit) and then the mw is in charge after baby is born up to 14days and then HV pops by to see how everything I going, some can be a bit extreme so best to take what they say with a pinch of salt just remember your the mum and the HV sees babies every day as we all know all babies are different so what may work for 1 may not work for another mum always knows best so don't feel pressured into something because your HV says its best

What she said.

Hmm, interesting - does sound like they are a bit of a mixed bag and rather a lottery if you get a decent one that one can gel with. Thanks for the heads up!

My DD is 2. I have seen my HV twice (once antenatally!) - I haven't avoided her, there just isn't much provision in this area. Got a letter last week telling me that I won't get an antenatal visit with DC2 unless I ask for one - suits me!

I agree with Mosschops about HVs, some are excellent. I worked with an amazing team when I was a student nurse. Mine is...not great. she was somewhat hectoring about breastfeeding but offered no support to actually DO it and when I have rung her for advice she comes over as pretty dim and never tells me any more than google could.

My friend's sis is a HV and she is fabulous, really cares about what she does and very very knowledgeable (I use her as my unofficial HV I admit!). Luck of the draw...

I feel very sorry for our HVs, they are always late and often need to check notes/double check fact with you because they have MASSIVE case loads, there just are not enough of them. They do the absolute minimum number of visits because they don't have time for more. It is terrible because they can't provide the service they want to provide and mothers feel as though they can't ask for a visit when they really need one. I fear that a lot of problems are going to end up undetected, especially PND. It isn't their fault, it is funding.

helenovhull I can see your point and think it's great you have an 'unofficial' person you can check things up with.

I too have barely seen my HV and when I have she seems to barely know my name nor the name of my son. My husband is a GP so I ask him a lot of questions that many people would go to their HV about. In fact, so little faith do I have in my individual HV, I wouldn't even consider contacting her as my 1st port of call if I had a query :(

I do worry for some mums who are struggling, who may be feeling very lost and who may need additional help. Sort of worry about them slipping through the net.

I'm very much in support of health visiting as a service and I wish they would properly fund and support it.
Two of my colleagues trained as HVs in the last five years or so but there were no jobs when they qualified so they have come straight back to nursing - what was the point of that! They would both make fab HVs too.

What I do find odd is that I live in a "deprived" area with high levels of teenage pregnancy, lone parents, vulnerably housed, asylum seekers etc. and there are only enough resources for 2 routine HV visits (if that). My mum lives in a nice leafy middle class area and her neighbour's HV comes round once a fortnight "for a cup of tea and a chat"!

I had to ring the HV office to request a 1 year assessment for DS. Don't know anyone else who's HV had 'forgotten' the way mine had He finally was seen at 15 months.

He's now 2 months over-due for his 2 year assessment, but I can't be bothered ringing up to request it as I have no concerns about his health. Sort of think that if she can't get her caseload sorted then I'm not going to chase her.

Am due a baby when DS will be 2 and a half, so maybe she will assess both children together... or I might just contact the office and request a different HV who doesn't make steam come out of my ears.

Oh dear it seems I have had a loathing of HVs longer than I've known

I spoke to my mum last night and asked her in passing what HERS was like. It appears the one she had with me was fantastic but the one she had with my brother was diabolical. I was about 18 months when my brother was born and on one visit she made my mum cry and I crawled under the table and bit her on the ankle really hard!!! serves her right for making mummy cry so there

I had severe PND, was suicidal and almost homicidal my HV did one of those Edingburgh Tests "boring, i am really very worried about you - you are clinically depressed, i'll be back tomorrow" I never saw her again My PND festered on for a furhter 18m before a nurse at the treatment clinic marched me into see my GP. I was on ADs for three years and had counselling, left with crippling anxiety - i will never know if, had i acted sooner i wouldn't be left with this now :(

Ours is really nice, if a bit over-cautious, but I think that is because she just takes her job seriously and doesn't want to neglect any possible problems. I'd rather have it that way, than hear a case like boring outlined above!

When I had DD1, I didn't let in the first HV who came round. Here, the mws come every day with your 1st baby, until the cord stump falls off, and DD1's stayed on for ages - about 12 days. When the HV turned up, we were about to go out (had got ourselves and DD1 ready, about to leave the house), had had 12 days of waiting in for mws, and no contact from the HV at all, so no idea when she would turn up. I told her (politely) that we were going out, and it wasn't convenient to see her at that time. I didn't see her again for about 2 years!

Our current HV came round the next day. She was very supportive about feeding (I expressed for 6 months for DD1) and later she was very conscientious about DD1's asthma, eczema and allergies, including berating a GP over the phone, in my hearing, about not taking her asthma seriously enough, and ordering him to make us another appointment that afternoon!!!

Because DD1 had various health issues, we did see her quite regularly, but with DD2 we didn't see her as much, and have not seen her since the 9 month check. DD2 is now 2.4, and extremely healthy and there wasn't much we needed her to do for us really. We also had very few mw visits (about 3 or 4 postnatal visits) with DD2, as we knew what we were doing, and just didn't need them to come every day.

I'm hoping that the HV can combine DD2's 2 1/2 year check with a postnatal visit when DD3 is born next month!