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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

My "birth plan" seems a bit crap.

97 replies

ChineapplePunk · 30/12/2011 22:03

Basically, my birth plan consists of seeing how far I can get with gas and air and then opting for an epidural if I don't think I can make it. Can't really think of anything else I would like to include in regards to pain relief. I really do not fancy taking pethidine or any other opiates. From what I have read, it doesn't sound particularly beneficial for either baby or mother. Has anyone anything positive to say about it? Or any advice in regards to maybe coming up with a more comprehensive birth plan if this sounds a bit too basic? I usually feel that simplicity is best, but hey, having a baby may not be that simple and I am fully prepared for the fact that anything could happen (although I hope I'm one of the lucky ones.) :)

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

StarlightMcKenzie · 30/12/2011 23:05

Bamboozled. The safety of the baby is intinsically tied up with the emotional well being of the mother, as is the mother's health.

For her emotional well ring to be ignored in favour of the more 'superficial' safety of both can be quite seriously detrimental to one or both. Medical staff are usually concerned only with thus 'superficial' level of health. Midwives, particularly homebirth and mlu are learning more about the rest of it. But it is a slow process and has cost, training and funding implications.

happylittlebear · 30/12/2011 23:06

Going against the grain here but I had pethidene and it was fantastic
I was induced and completely freaked out when they broke my waters and I started having really strong contractions that I couldn't cope on the gas & air and begged for an epidural.
There was such a long wait for the anaesthetist that they offered my pethidene in the meantime which I agreed to, and instantly calmed down and concentrated on my breathing.
By the time they were ready with the epidural I was 8cm so carried on without it.
I had a fantastic birth, calm and controlled and was up & about and in the bath an hour after having him which I wouldn't have been able to do with an epidural.
If you don't like the idea then by all means read up on what your alternatives are but don't rule it out completely, I know several others who have had happy successful births with pethidene.
As for your birth plan, mine was go with whatever I feel is right at the time!

scottishmummy · 30/12/2011 23:06

wholeheartedly agree,birth plan is written calmly,pain free, raft of references.becomes a wish list and can be very woolly and unrealistic. and it had become the middle class badge of honour the natural birth, and birth plan of chanting an incantation,bouncing on gym ball, sipping homeopathic gloop. and If the plan,not as planned it can be considered failure

sayjay · 30/12/2011 23:10

Who has 1 rigid plan though? Think mine were so long partly because, like the choose your own adventure comment, I discussed my preferences in a number of different scenarios.

bamboozled · 30/12/2011 23:16

Ah - starlight - you have obviously had a difficult experience so best we don't argue this one out as we will be standing on different sides of the line and won't ever be able to persuade each other. Deliveries can (and do) change from utterly normal to extremely dangerous for mother or child in a matter of moments at which point emotional well being is not really the most important issue. Regularly in delivery suites, there are very confused and upset women, even after delivery of a healthy baby because it didn't follow their plan, when they are not noticing that the important thing is that there is a baby in their arms.

LikeAnAdventCandleButNotQuite · 30/12/2011 23:17

I really think (after just having my first, possibly only) that the best Birth Plans can only be written for any births after your first. Only now I know how labour goes can I really think 'this is exactly what I plan for my second'....saying that, lots of external factors can get in the way.

With mine, it basically said pain releif to be minimal, but will take the direction of MW if they think I need to ramp it up; prefer not to have epidural, forceps or c-sec (ended up having epi and forceps)

And I highlighted the two 'non-negotiables' on the page (1) DH to tell me the sex and (2) DH and I to have any interventions/medical anomolies explained to us so we were fully aware of what was happening at every stage.

I have to say, my MW was exceptional, and it was very clear to me that she had read my Birth Plan. She took the time to explain everything the doctors said they needed to do, and she was very good at reminding the team in the Theatre of my wish for DH to tell me the sex (even though he couldnt work it out bless him, for the cord, and the doc had to do a swift thumbs up when he guessed)

Its worth writing one, even if it is to detail the one or two non-negotionables, or to get across a dear wish of yours.

wigglesrock · 30/12/2011 23:20

I also had pethedine for all 3 of my dds and have absolutely no complaints at all about it. I used gas and air then pethedine. I also kept mobile during all of the labour with lots of baths and had dd2 kneeling by the side of the bed. I didn't do a birth plan.

FunnysInTheGarden · 30/12/2011 23:21

thing is that how can you plan something you have no clue about? Really, until you have had a child how can you know you want no pethadine or a natural third stage etc? You are relying upon what other folk have written about their experiences to draw a plan for yours. It's nonsense. Only a woman on her 3rd + child could possibly have formulated these opinions.

DiscoDaisy · 30/12/2011 23:24

FunnysInTheGarden I've had 5 labours and each one has been different and had different requirements so a pre conceived birth plan would have been useless even by the 5th.

MJinSparklyStockings · 30/12/2011 23:25

3 births here

I have to say I went with the flow but with each progressive birth they were easier and I was far more aware of what I wanted - by 3rd a totally natural birth almost delivered her myself - dh arrived in time to catch her.

My best post birth tips.

take Lactulose as a matter of course for a few days.
pre soak a few packets of maternity pads with a few drops of tea tree oil each
keep a sports bottle next to the sink and a bottle of tea tree oil, when going to loo, put a few drops of tea tree into bottle - fill with warm water and aim while weeing.

I did the above with dc3 and she was the only one I didn't need anti bs with.

Good luck - remember it can't be that bad or none of u's would ever have any more.

HandMini · 30/12/2011 23:26

I guess we can all only give our own experiences and yours will depend on so many factors, but my take on the birth plan is that its more useful if you are keen FOR intervention. I was always of the mind that I did want an epidural, wrote this clearly on my birth plan and I think it meant the midwives didn't give me lots of "why don't you see how you're managing in an hour" gubbins. They just got on and called the anaesthetist.

MJinSparklyStockings · 30/12/2011 23:26

I wasn't freebiething btw - I didn't realise how far along I was gone until it was too late.

sayjay · 30/12/2011 23:27

I knew I wanted a physiogical 3rd stage because I had done a lot of reading, informed myself on the issue and discussed it with my mw.
Would you say to those who eg decline vaccinations they don't have a clue until they have vaccinated other children?

FunnysInTheGarden · 30/12/2011 23:28

see Disco thats why I said 3. I have had 2 DC and couldn't have written a plan for either of them. I was hedging my bets that by no 3 you may have some clue about procedure. But from what you have said it's totally not the case. Respect btw for having 5 DC!

scottishmummy · 30/12/2011 23:28

thats a shockingly poor analogy sayjay

DiscoDaisy · 30/12/2011 23:30

FunnysInTheGarden Thank you!

FunnysInTheGarden · 30/12/2011 23:30

what is a physiological phase 3 anyway?

sayjay · 30/12/2011 23:31

why? Someone deciding how to proceed on a health matter after considering the information and discussion with HP.

MJinSparklyStockings · 30/12/2011 23:33

third stage

It's where the cord remains unclamped until it stops pulsing.

CervixWithASmile · 30/12/2011 23:39

Starlight, I absolutely agree with everything you're saying. It's not that I think midwives and doctors are 'out to get me' but don't believe that hospital protocol and obstetric training / experience that treats birth as a medical issue is conducive to a safe and rewarding birth experience for my child and me. In fact I think the two could not be further apart.

I find it amusing that we're taught to be so blasé about the liklihood of our own birth plans being followed yet allow hospitals to foist theirs upon us. E.G you had better progress within our timeframe, not your body or your baby's and here us what we'll 'allow' you to do etc

FunnysInTheGarden · 30/12/2011 23:42

so what would happen if you had to have an EMCS? Would you still be able to have a physiological third stage?

MJinSparklyStockings · 30/12/2011 23:46

I don't know much about c secs but I doubt it.

Too much intervention - the other part is letting the placenta cone away naturally.

I also agree with starlight - I think the reason dd ended up coming at home was I had managed my own labour, the way I wanted, in the privacy and comfort of my own home - well own bath, with no interruptions (not even dh)

sayjay · 30/12/2011 23:47

It gets complicated.
See this link.
That would come under 'deviation from ideal' plan for me

sayjay · 30/12/2011 23:48

sorry scroll to 'resus with intact cord'

MJinSparklyStockings · 30/12/2011 23:51

Dc was a perfect water birth - but the injection made things take a different turn - I wasn't planning to have it with dd.

Dh is very broody so I may have 9 months to plan another - I could yet be persuaded!

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