How will I cope? *complex situation* ;(

[Dozeyland]

Hi,

I am a 1yr old DD, and nearly 12 weeks pregnant with dc2. DP & I are happy but there is another issue along side this.

DP was in a car crash early this yr and is now facing 2-3yrs in prison. effective from either this monday or in 4 weeks. (could possibly be halved)
There is lots of evidence, and its a very complex issue. in no way am i being bias, but it was a dreadful freak accident with dp was on his way to a job. the other driver died due to his vehicle being a lot smaller and not wearing a seatbelt. so my poor dp is bearing the brunt.

he is amazing, his strength astonishes me and he just makes my heart melt.

I just dont know how i'm going to cope. being alone at night (use to him being at work in the day) and him missing DD growing, and the birth of DC2. We have a great family network but i just cant bare the thought of him being in prison with proper criminals. his barrister said you're not a criminal, these things happen. but someone has to be responsible.

i am just so all over. happy but cant feel excited for DC2. how am i going to do it alone, emotionally knowing the love of my life is being punished and away from us.

;(

I am not in Oxford, but have friend close by and we were randomly discussing an entirely different case from a few years back (where someone was sent down because of an accident that occurred when he was stung by a bee) and it came up. I think nearly anyone who has ever sat behind the wheel of a car or even contemplated it (I can't drive yet!) would feel the same as me, it sends shivers down my spine because it is just one of those things that could happen to any of us. You will get through this, you will. Your husband is so young so I am guessing you are too, you have a lot of life ahead of you and you can weather this storm x

I'm in Oxford and recognise this case. Oh you poor thing. I'm so so sorry - I'm due in May too and can't imagine how you are feeling. Seconding penguinarmy - I'd be more than happy to lend a shoulder.

Wow - this story has made me cry. And feel somewhat ragey. The Criminal 'Justice' System is about as unjust an institution I can think of. And so effin random. This is from someone who works in the Criminal Justice System. Good luck with the solicitors and getting it heard again. I'm refraining myself from the bitterness I feel when I think of the people the system actually serve. I hope that this too passes quickly and without much more pain.

I'm with you brownb, it seems totally senseless to send someone to prison who clearly isn't a criminal. The case is unbelievably sad for all concerned but sending the OP's DP to prison achieves absolutely nothing and just creates more innocent victims (including the OP's children).

I understand that they need to send a message that people should only drive when they are fit to do so, but, given the circumstances, surely a community sentence would be far more appropriate.

Having read the story it scares me how easily you could end up being sent down. Show me a parent who hasn't driven when tired or distracted by the children...

OP - I hope you manage to make the most of Christmas for your DD's sake. I will thinking of you and hope your DP will be home soon.