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Pregnancy

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Original poster

20 week scan

37 replies

NorthernGirlie · 20/09/2011 07:44

Hi all
]
Just a quick question - I've got my 20 week scan booked at local NHS hospital in a few weeks (I'm 15 + 5). and was just wondering about procedure for those of you who've been for one already...

At my dating scan I noticed that other women were being called in for their 20 week scan and Dads were turned away from the consultation room initially (very nicely, not as it sounds!!) and told that 'We'll see Mam first then call you'. They were called in about 15 mins later.

At the end of my dating scan the sonogropher said 'See you in a few weeks, we'll be seeing you first then invite Dad in'

To be honest we were so busy thinking about the current scan that we didn't think anything of it - but we're now wondering why this would happen.

Partner has joked they must be planning on having a 'rummage' - my guess is they ask questions they prefer you to hear on your own??

Any ideas for a curious Mammy to be??

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BedHog · 20/09/2011 07:59

This sounds very strange, I've never heard of the dads being told to wait outside before. What did they do at your 12 week scan before your bloke was allowed in? Doesn't sound very nice to be honest - what about those few women who get bad news, do they have to hear that on their own?

My 20 week scan was very similar in procedure to the 12 week scan, just longer and more detailed. They do lots of measurements and plot them on the computer, and check the heart, brain, other organs, arms and legs, and the gender if you want them to (we didn't). I think they also check the position of the placenta, and the amniotic fluid levels.

There's actually less rummaging than at the 12 week scan, as the baby is higher up and easier to access!

muffins · 20/09/2011 08:03

Although this isn't the policy where I work I assume
it's for the same reason that children often aren't allowed in til the end-to allow us to concentrate properly on the scan. Although I haven't had too many probs with dads some do make it hard to do ur job properly-one chap I remembered insisted on standing with his head so close to mine I could feel his breath on my face, very offputting and I had to ask him to sit
down!

Oeisha · 20/09/2011 08:36

Seems very odd if it's "only a scan" (and not an antenatal check too). DH was in with me all the way. From my understanding, you have the right to have a representative of your choice wiht you throughout your care - if that's your DH, then that's what they have to live with. I can see why they don't want children in the scan (if they do see something, they are meant to disclose it there and then).

I'd ring them now and clarify what they want you to do. If they don't want your DH in with you, ask them why, and if the reason is something along the lines of "he'll get in the way" ask to speak to someone more senior and explain that you're increadably anxious and need him there. Which PCT is it out of interest?

Oeisha · 20/09/2011 08:37

Oh, just read this in the NHS website:
"...Ask for the picture to be explained to you if the image seems confusing. It should be possible for your partner to come with you and see the scan. Many couples feel that this helps to make the baby seem real for them both. Ask if it's possible to have a copy of the picture. There might be a small charge for this. " From this site.
They'd have to have a pretty good reason IMHO.

HereIGo · 20/09/2011 08:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Oeisha · 20/09/2011 08:52

As far as I can tell, most scans are done by a sonographer, not a trained MW. Therefor the antenatal session and the scans are usually separate. Yes, they will ask about domestic abuse about this time, but at the scan seems a highly inappropriate time to be asking, unless they think you're in imminent danger...

BedHog · 20/09/2011 08:55

HereIGo - surely if this is the reason the dads are left outside at the 12 week scan, they wouldn't need to ask again at the 20 week. And it would normally be a midwife asking these type of questions, not the sonographer.

I would have found it extremely traumatic to go to either of the scans by myself - I was in tears and terrified as it was following a mmc last year.

MrsHuxtable · 20/09/2011 09:53

Hmmm, having my 20 week scan in exactly an hour so will report back what they did. But I also think that at the scan you don't actually get to see a midwife so I wonder what this is all about. I never had an NHS scan before so I have nothing to compare it to. I shall see...

notcitrus · 20/09/2011 09:56

At mine, DH came in with me - he was told where to sit out of the way, but there wasn't any issue. Pre-12-weeks there's no space in the room so I think if you have someone there then they have to stand in the corner.

Could it be the other chaps had children with them so were looking after them?

spannermary · 20/09/2011 10:11

We've rescheduled 12 week scan purely so that DH can be there. The baby belongs to both of us: I feel very strongly about this. My 12w scan is in just over a week so I'll let you all know.

TeacupTempest · 20/09/2011 10:22

Where abouts are you? That sounds odd. There was no question DH was with me at our scan. It was important for him to see baby too especially as it must seem so much more abstract for him as he isn't the one with it growing inside him.

Are you sure they were there for the 20 scan? Though even if they were having a check up I don't see why partner's couldn't be there if they were wanted......its not like they wouldn't have seen it before!

Original poster

NorthernGirlie · 20/09/2011 20:32

Hi All

Thought it was odd - we're in Sunderland if that makes any difference?

I've already been asked about the domestic abuse (well - midwife gave me a form to fill in whilst dp was in the room with me so would have been hard lines if i was being abused lol)

I have my 16 week apointment on Thursday so will ask the midwife then!

NG x

OP posts:

MrsHuxtable · 20/09/2011 20:57

Hello again,
so I did have the 20 week scan today and as suspected there was no midwife, it was just the sonographer. DH came in with me, no problem...

thisisyesterday · 20/09/2011 21:00

i've never had a problem with dp coming in with me either. 3 children, 7 scans in total.

never been asked about domestic abuse either at a scan. a scan is just that... the sonographer checking your baby... they don't ask anything about your situation (unless relevant to viewing the baby!)

wompoopigeon · 20/09/2011 21:01

That sounds very weird. I had my 20 week scan yesterday and DH was in from the start.

I know that there is a reason to keep them out of some MW appts (to ask about domestic violence, as others have said) but the sonographer didn't ask any MW-type questions, just straight on with the cold jelly and doing his measurements. The only thing was that there were signs everywhere saying that it was not allowed to take photos or videos during the scan. I think they must have had some real pain in the arse fathers interrupting everything to get some nice shots for Facebook!

Flisspaps · 20/09/2011 21:04

I'd bloody well insist that DH came in with me from the start, he was there for every minute of my antenatal appointments with DD and he'll be coming to all of them this time too, including scans.

Original poster

NorthernGirlie · 20/09/2011 22:03

Hmmm - def sounds weird then! Thanks all!!

OP posts:

whackamole · 20/09/2011 22:17

How very odd! OH came into both my scans this time, and all of them last time - I was never asked about DV was that a joke?!?!

MrsHuxtable · 20/09/2011 22:34

Btw, I never got asked about DV either even though DH wasn't in the room with me at my booking appointment..

milkyways · 20/09/2011 22:44

Strange. Is it anything to do with finding out the gender? I know some hospitals don't tell you the sex of the baby, due to cultural issues of some patients. Maybe they've made it into a standard procedure for everyone to avoid discrimination?

I had loads of scans in early pregnancy and DH came to all of them with me. At the 20 week scan I was given a leaflet not to bring children along, but I took DD anyway, and she was happily welcomed into the room.

SurprisEs · 20/09/2011 23:05

Weird, I was never asked to go alone into a scan and was never asked about DV at any point of my care.

Pastabee · 21/09/2011 07:57

Same here - DH welcomed and everything explained to both of us. Hospital even has big flat screens on the wall so we could watch everything. This is a very bizarre policy.

I don't really see how they can refuse to let you have someone with you really. It would be the same as any other medical appointment where you can have someone with you if you choose too??

featherbag · 21/09/2011 08:10

I knew you were in Sunderland as soon as I read your message! Don't worry, he won't miss anything! They don't allow dads in at first because of long experience of even the best behaved dads interrupting/getting in the way while they're trying to do the important part of the scan, the measuring etc. They don't talk to you a great deal while they're doing this either. As soon as they have what they need, they'll fetch dad. They then scan baby for the things YOU want to see, including sex if you want to know. This scan is shown on a flat screen monitor so you can both see comfortably.

Words of warning - you need to have 3 x £1 coins to buy tickets from the machine in the waiting room to get prints of your scan pictures. Do this before you go in! If you'd like to know the sex, ask the receptionist for a consent form when you check in for your appointment, as they don't offer them unless you ask, and the sonographer won't tell you if you don't have it! I'm 30+3 and having my baby at the same hospital, feel free to ask if I can help with anything else.

BedHog · 21/09/2011 08:21

What an odd way to do things featherbag! So what happens when they do find problems? Do they wait until the dad is in the room so they can tell them together? And can the mum see the screen while she is there by herself, or is it turned away until the dad comes in? Do they make exceptions for women who come to scans terrified and in tears because of previous bad scan experiences?

I'm very glad I don't live in Sunderland!!!

Flisspaps · 21/09/2011 08:50

featherbag I'd be massively bloody angry if they tried to keep DH out whilst they did the 'important bits'. That's the point of him being there. I can't begin to imagine not having him in if they started the scan only to find something awful had happened - lets be honest, it would be apparent pretty quickly. Being forced to be on my own for that would be far FAR worse than them having to take a few minutes longer to get some measurements because of someone supposedly interrupting or getting in the way.

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