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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Anyone used an independent midwife??

26 replies

luckywinner · 01/09/2011 21:32

I have severe depression and have been seriously let down by my hospital today. Without going into too much detail they promised one to one care and now they are claiming they are too short staffed to provide this. I can't afford private care but for my sanity (which is incredibly important as I have 2 other dc), I could afford a private midwife, but have no idea where to find one. I am in London. Has anyone used one? Could anyone recommend one?

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edwinbear · 01/09/2011 21:39

I have one after an awful birth with DS. I'm 28 weeks and starting seeing her from about 10 weeks. It's been superb so far, my appointments are at home at times to suit me, she is usually here for at least an hour and is also a trained hypnobirthing practitioner so she is training me with that too. Where in London are you? She covers South London.

Original poster

luckywinner · 01/09/2011 21:44

Hi edwinbear, I am in Kensal Rise, which is north london-ish. So I think I maybe out of her catchment area but she sounds great. I am so glad to hear you are having a better experience this time round. This is definitely the last time I am doing this and I have been told I have to breastfeed due to the drugs I am on, so I am terrified of being left to it.

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BeautifulBirths · 01/09/2011 21:48

Go to www.independentmidwives.org.uk. You can type in your postcode and find your nearest midwives. Meet as many as you need to to find the right one. Best of luck. Erika (independent midwife in Dorset and Hampshire)

spudulika · 01/09/2011 21:53

I can recommend South London Independent Midwives (I think they cover north London):

here

Tina and Teresa delivered my 11lbs second baby at home and then Tina delivered my third in hospital.

They are fab!

ristretto · 01/09/2011 21:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tinkerisdead · 01/09/2011 22:05

I used one. Not in your area but just to say it was amazing. All my antenatal was at home. Was planning a homebirth but had to transfer to hospital after failure to progress. She never left my side. Even though it was a day she was with me! She was the person they handed dd to after my c section. She got breastfeeding established in recovery and I had 22 days of support after the birth. On dd's first birthday she came back to visit.

This time I'm preg with dc2. I can't afford it but I'd truly go into debt for her service again. But she's not practicing at the moment. The difference in my care now I'm under nhs is shocking to me. Although my indie midwife texts me a lot to check on progress and give advice. Hope you find one you like.

ristretto · 01/09/2011 22:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

spudulika · 01/09/2011 22:16

Tina is a good friend of mine ris. Love her to bits.

Also agree it's the best money I've ever spent. We don't have any savings so had to raise the money on the mortgage to pay for the first birth. Second one she did gratis.

PinkFondantFancy · 02/09/2011 03:36

I'm being looked after by www.rightsofpassagemidwifery.co.uk. I haven't given birth yet but she has been fab so far. She might well cover your area.

Original poster

luckywinner · 02/09/2011 10:13

Thank you so much everyone. I felt so despondent yesterday. It is so shocking how much your care can vary, and mainly due to budget constraints. I feel like maternity services in the UK are about to implode, but then that's another thread!

I am going to park the children in front of tv and work my way through all your recommendations. Fingers crossed.

OP posts:

helibee · 02/09/2011 17:15

I used Amelia Parker from Essex Independant Midwives. She was truly amazing and I would highly recommend her. I know she had clients in Londn when she looked after me. Hope you find someone great

mumtoted · 02/09/2011 17:27

I had one for my 2 dc, not in your area, but would agree with the others that it was the best money ever spent.

PinkFondantFancy · 03/09/2011 07:00

Apologies for thread hijack but I was wondering: did any of you ladies use your IM for a planned hospital birth? I just don't think I can go through with the idea of a homebirth. I understand that the IM can't be your caregiver in hospital but what part did she actually have in your hospital birth?

ristretto · 04/09/2011 15:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tinkerisdead · 04/09/2011 19:55

Pink i was planning homebirth but ended up in hospital with full interventions. So far from what i wanted. My midwife was my voice in that room. Truly amazing. She explained or queried everything if ness. She was given huge respect as another midwife in the room. I felt something come down my leg and my midwife checked, told the hospital midwife it was meconium and cleaned me up.

Indie midwives have to complete hours of work in hospitals to maintain their status etc and still work with head midwives in hospital. Mine explained to me that i could choose the hospital she was contracted to and be treated by her. I chose a different hospital but i could have had a hospital birth with her.

liger · 04/09/2011 20:12

I used Nyree at Sage Femme twice, after after having a traumatic loss of my DD at 24 weeks pregnant and not wanting to have to re tell my history every visit, I needed continuity of care all the way through. Will echo what others have said that it was the best money I have spent. Sage Femme is based in Muswell Hill so may work for you. Can't write at length now but am happy to answer questions later on. Good luck

PinkFondantFancy · 04/09/2011 20:31

Thanks Ristretto and the Doctorswife. Yep it's my first. I've booked the IM and she has been fab so far for my antenatal care. I was just asking because I want to make sure I fully understand what it's reasonable to expect of her in hospital. I've got my next appointment with her in a fortnight but wanted to check in case I go into labour in the meantime!!

Doctorswife sorry you didn't get the birth you wanted but I'm glad that the IM made it as good as it could be.

edwinbear · 04/09/2011 22:51

pinkfondantfancy I'm having a planned hospital birth and using the IM as my birth partner. i tested positive for GB Strep with DS and expect to with DC2 as well so will need IV antibiotics, I also couldn't have managed without an epidural and because of damage caused during DS birth I'm consultant led. DH was so traumatised by DS birth he isn't coming to this one so my IM will be there instead. The intention has always been that having an IM present at this birth should mean that the catalogue of errors made last time won't happen again as I'll have someone who knows what should/shouldn't happen with me, as opposed to it just being me and DH, who didn't have a clue with it being our first.

Beesok · 04/09/2011 23:45

Can't comment on the birth aspect as I am only 34 wks but I have had an IM since 12 wks and I am very happy so far, I have had a fairly uncomplicated pregnancy so far but had my moments in the first few months and having someone I could call 24/7 to discuss any concerns was invaluable, as a first timer and not really knowing what to expect it was really important for me to have that continuity of care throughout the whole 40 wks and esp. during labour. Also, as much as my DH is supportive and will def. be with me throughout the birth he has no clue about the medical side of things so I need to know that there will be someone there who knows what things should look like and is biased towards my baby's and my priorities rather than those of hospital staff....

I had the option to pay a deposit at the booking appt and then 12 monthly installments so the cost was spread out and pretty manageable.

Beesok · 04/09/2011 23:48

Sorry, of course you asked for recommendations! I am with Odette at Regent's Midwifery (she covers London) and works with Nyree from Sage Femme mentioned above :)
I had found them both through google - met both and liked them equally, in fact it was a tough choice but went with Odette as I had met her first and then turns out that Nyree would be covering in case of emergency/prolonged labour so have appts with her too and they are both great.

hawthers · 05/09/2011 14:23

i'm so sorry that you've had such a tough time with your first birth.

no recommendations sorry and using nhs this time but wanted to say that nhs experience first time around was rubbish - saw a different midwife each time, none of whom had bothered to read my (extensive) notes. all said that i'd make term and all would be fine (all of which contradicting consultants opinion and reality).

This time around a completely different experience. At my first MW appt she said i'd see her for every appt, she knew my history and had all sorts of brilliant pertinent suggestions for my care. She is basically providing the emotional and mental support for me to have the birth I want for no. 2 (if possible) while consultant does medical stuff. She is clearly a legend and should be cloned!

Experience can be completely different with same drs, MW practice, hosp so might be worth sounding them out this time around in case personnel have changed?

hawthers · 05/09/2011 14:23

argh just re read your message and now understand - please ignore most of my message - can i blame it on pregnancy goldfish brain - sorry x

Original poster

luckywinner · 10/09/2011 14:07

Just popping back on this thread to say thanks again for all your comments. Beesok, I am meeting Odette on Monday. She seemed lovely on the phone. I am even debating a home birth, although I think my dh won't be very keen on it. I hope everything goes ok with all who are pregnant. Hawthers, don't worry! Already have 2 dc and one awful birth, one divine! Fingers crossed for this one. I am worrying more about afterwards though as I freak out!!

OP posts:

Beesok · 10/09/2011 17:44

Hi Luckywinner that's great news - I hope your meeting goes well, she is absolutely lovely and very supportive!
Good luck with your decision and with the pregnancy :)

jcandps · 11/09/2011 20:57

I second South London Independant Midwives - I had Annie and Tina and a better experience I could not have hoped for. They go out of their way to assist you and are there for you for so long afterwards.

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