Things about pregnancy that no one tells you

[CBear6]

I'm starting to remember the weird things I noticed when pregnant with DS, mainly because they're happening again with this one, and at the time I wondered why no one ever mentions these things, not even the books (or at least the ones I read).

Things like:

• rolling over in bed becomes a test of strength, patience, and momentum. It's all about timing the pivot and the flop and using Whatever is in reach (sorry DH) for leverage

• your nipples get huge and change colour

• morning sickness isn't just in the morning, sometimes it's all day and all night too

• the random hormone-fuelled dreams

• the hair. It'll either stop growing and go all lank or it'll grow like weeds. And it's not just the hair on your head that's affected

• skin tags. For whatever reason they're common in pregnancy. I didn't know this until the doctor told me so when I got one on the end of my nipple, it turned black (the tag not the nipple)

That I would become allergic to all forms of deodorant, which still continues now.. dc is 2.10 :-( hmmm... itchy armpits for life anyone?

Every time I get startled, eg an unexpected loud noise or one of the children makes me jump by launching itself, hissing like a banshee, out of a dark corner at me for sport (I'm looking at you 8 yr old ds1), my heart goes into overdrive and I swear I can feel adrenaline pump out of me. It's horrible. I could cry each time it happens. Can't remember this with previous pgs (this is dc3)

Skin tags all around my bum hole so it looks like I have genital warts (I haven't, I checked as dh and I were freaking out) and acne. On my arse.

The fact that you pee yourself regularly.

The feeling so sick for months you actually think it was all a terrible mistake.

The feelings of unbridled rage and irritation you get with your nearest and dearest.

I have a single, solitary, hair on my chin (he's called Robert - using French pronounciation). Oddly every time I am pregnant, Robert completely stops growing and only starts growing again when I'm no longer pregnant.

I a either starving or full, there is no in between and when I'm starving, anything will do, even last night's cold, soggy nachos . . . I reached that new low today.

I'm 9 weeks so far :) so this is all first trimester stuff I wasn't prepared for. The vomiting. Nausea doesn't even come close. I can vomit on command at any given point in the day or night. It goes beyond feeling sick. Feel so dreadful there is no room for any other emotion which is not necessarily a bad thing as the alternative is bursting into tears at work on the hour! I was so sick I had to take a week off work and even now I struggle to do a full day.

The inability to eat anything apart from white toast which I haven't eaten in 20 years. Literally cannot stomach anything else. Going to brave some yoghurt and banana today in an attempt at some nutrition.

Random runs if I eat something remotely healthy like fruit. Wasn't expecting that.

I have chronic insomnia coupled with the most random dreams. Feeling exhausted after work does not translate into dreamless 8 hours of sleep. I am up at 3am and wide awake till 5.30ish when I drop back off to sleep. To more strange dreams.

And the most disconcerting are what I describe to my husband as 'twing twang twongs' down there. Sometimes it's like a mild throb, sometimes it's lots of little shooting pains streaking up my vag and sometimes my ovaries feel like they are being stabbed or the sides of my uterus are a drum kit. Not cramping Thank goodness but very very odd. I am assured by my dr that this is 100% normal!

Such fun :)

mmm, I get a hair right in the middle of my forehead. One day it isn't there, the next day it is 2 inches long. I am not making this up. I only get this when I am pregnant. DH thinks it's hilarious and plucks it for me. Oh the joy...

Oh and some ladies mentioned discharge. This is tmi sorry but there is so much of it I get scared sometimes! Thank god for this thread because otherwise I would have gone nuts!

MissMedusa you are hilarious.

• I've had an influx of hair below my belly button

• Random fury (taken out on DP of course)

• Can't see my vaj but know that it's a forest (sorry for tmi)

• Nothing, and I mean nothing can ease the discomfort on my diaphragm

• HEARTBURN! Oh Lawd

Oh god this thread is brilliant, has cheered me up a treat. Posting so it maybe rises up the threads list again for others to enjoy.

nAm week 37 now, feet hurt like never before sharp stabbing pains in myankles cannotseem to calm the, I can hardly bloody walk and when I do I'm like a slow duck my bottom crack is sore and surprisingly I feel like I want to have sex a lot but I can barely move about in bed without it hurting being out of breath and feeling of nausea in the morning such that I can't face eating my breakfast but if I don't I feel worse

It might be a zombie thread but it's a good'un.

One thing that has not actually been mentioned, so might just be me is the constant belching. If I'm hungry, I get heartburn and belch (more air in gut?). Once I've eaten, I belch (food digesting in gut). Gaviscon eases the acid rage of heartburn but yes, you've guessed it, makes me belch. Proper big, echoey, long, deep belches too. I would say satisfying but I seem to need to do another very soon afterwards. Worse as the day goes on, so as it's not yet 9am I am in a blissful heartburn/belch-free state until about lunchtime.

I bet next door neighbours think it's DH

The constant feeling that "I'm doing it wrong". I should be eating all natural foods and doing Pilates and in reality I'm sat on my sofa scoffing family bags of Doritos and watching Buffy.

Not rtft so apologies if this has already been mentioned.

"That if you get a severe cold (as I did when pg with DS and have right now with this one) you can't take anything that actually has any effect"

I had this (I thought) with dd, from talking to other mum's on pre-natal ward as on bed rest for serious pre-eclampsia learned that a stuffy bad head cold feeling can be an early symptom of pre-eclampsia.

I had dd overseas. Afterwards I discovered this is recognised in some countries but not uk. So I'm spreading the word.

Yyy to the unremitting heartburn and constant 24-hour 10 month long 'morning sickness' it has to be a man who called it that!!

The fear something will go wrong
The emotions involved
Constipation being so bad you have to buy surgical gloves
The lack of energy in the last month
Pica-wanting to eat things like shoe polish and suck sponges.
Not being able to reach your own bits!
Swollen feet and hands
The way your body doesn't feel like your own anymore
How long it really feels at the time!

The fact that you will inevitably get pregnant at exactly the point in the year which means you are unable to drink at literally LOADS of totally incredible celebrations or one off events with fantastic free booze. See: christmas, weddings, anniversary parties, big office do's, 30th birthdays....etc.

The weird mood swings in the first and second trimesters

The constant sneezing

The fact you start getting loads more hair on your stomach. wtf???

Constant (literally near constant) need to pee. It's like you go in, wee, leave the toilet, then the baby shifts position and unleashes a whole other section of your bladder that was previously cut off.

Third trimester insomnia. You'd think nature would let you binge on sleep whilst you still can. NOPE.

Yes to increased skin tags - especially in bizarre places. I hope they go away afterwards?

How fucking amazing ultrasounds are. Even if you don't get/understand the over excitable american reaction of bursting into tears the second a fuzzy blob comes on screen, it's still literally the coolest experience ever. Technology is incredible.

Hello I'm pregnant with my first child I'm 40weeks today I was in the bath and noticed a hard vain like thing in my led I can't see anything and it's not sore but I did have 3 purple stretch marks on it dose anyone have any clues ? Thank you x

I'm 10 weeks today and have been really struggling but the thread is just the best and makes me laugh so so so much !!!!!!! :))))) ❤️

Shower nipples. Ack! SOOOO sensitive! My breast pain slacked off ages ago (I'm 25 weeks) but the shower nipples persist!

Just had a good read through. For me it's been the fatigue and the weird taste in my mouth that have been the surprises.
Oh and the constant worry - what does this cramp mean? Why have I stopped feeling sick?

I'm sure there's much more to come over the next few months...

Im 20 weeks now and have noticed increased hair on my stomach, even after shaving hair has grown back within a couple of days.
Ive also had hiccups daily and sneezing
Struggling to turn around in the bed at night
Painful stomach bloating after eating dinner

@bedfordmum22 who on earth are you talking/replying to?!?!

What a great zombie thread though for others to have a laugh at!!