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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Top tips please! Easy ttc need not apply: well done!

59 replies

FXXX · 07/01/2011 17:55

Been ttc for a year now: nothing happening. All tips gratefully received- even promise to road test each and every one! Regular 28 day cycle. Just bought Angus castus and soy isoflavones today from Holland and Barratt. Any success stories on these please? Please please help! Feel that time is running out fast. No kids yet. Full of maternal love- maybe just biological clock?! TIA

OP posts:
thatsnotmymonkey · 07/01/2011 17:58

Make sure your partner keeps his "area" cool and well supported. TTC friends of mine did it in the snow to make sure his balls were nice and cool- bingo the got pregnant.

Good Luck!

Another friend just conceived after 2.5 years, so hang in there, it will happen.

gallicgirl · 07/01/2011 18:10

Have you been checking ovulation and everything? I used fertility friend for hints.
There's such a small window of opportunity each month that you need to maximise that.

Eat, drink and live as if you are already pregnant and that goes for your partner too. Otherwise, if you've been ttc for 12 months then talk to your GP in case you and partner would benefit from testing.

Probably staying relaxed about the issue will help as well.

Good luck.

:)

SelinaDoula · 07/01/2011 18:11

Stop trying so hard, think about a holiday and having fun, try to have lots of sex because you want to, not just cause you are ttc.
Try to have an orgasm after your partner has come.
I took narly 3 years to get pg with my daughter. The holiday worked for me!
Good luck!
Selina x

flowerfairy · 07/01/2011 18:27

Fully recommend the holiday, because you feel relaxed. I took 3-4 years to conceive dc#2 and it happened after we returned from a short camping holiday last May. Especially as i think we only did the deed twice in that week after. Blush
Used ovulation sticks for dc#1 thinking well these will never work, did get a + did the deed many times as we could that week and it worked.
Don't give up and fingers crossed for a bfp!

faverolles · 07/01/2011 18:31

Acupuncture? Helped with the relaxing side of things too.

highheelsandequations · 07/01/2011 19:08

We were ttc for 18 months and I have PCOS, we had 3 rounds of clomid that failed to get me pregnant and I was about to sign up for IVF when I got my BFP.
Here's what I was using at the time (and yes I am a bit mental!):
agnus castus
aptimist honey with bee pollen
vitamin D
vitamin B6
pregnacare conception
grapefruit juice (pre ovulation)
fresh pineapple (post ovulation)
acupuncture
less exercise and more relaxation
changed diet according to 'The Baby Making Bible'
tried to SWI every other day as irregular cycles!

Something worked as now 13+2, don't know if it was any of the above but would definitely recommend acupuncture to help you relax/de-stress and it really helped change the way I think about stuff.

pepperonipizza · 07/01/2011 19:12

Taking charge of your fertility by Toni weschler. Fabulous book, candid pictures, extremely helpful. I also second using fertility friend. Good luck!

hippy3 · 07/01/2011 19:23

I totally swear by ACUPUNCTURE !!!....

My menstrual cycle was all over the place and I wasnt getting periods and knew that there was no way id be getting pregnant if it continued. I changed my diet just generally ate very healthily, tried to relax as much as possible and had a course of acupuncture.

The first few weeks I had 2 a week the one a week... for around 13 sessions.... they gave me these tablet herbal things to take to assist in menstruation and any blockages.

These might not be physical but emotional (if you believe in all this)!!

All i can say is it TOTALLY worked for me. We had unprotected sex one afternoon and we concieved that afternoon ! Am now 6 months with twins......

A friend of mine who also had trouble TTC tried acupuncture and swears by it as well...just a suggestion...good luck. x Smile

tebbles · 07/01/2011 19:39

Some friends both stopped drinking alcohol completely.

GrumpyFish · 07/01/2011 19:44

I second (third) acupuncture. Took 18 months for us to successfully conceive #2 despite fairly regular cycles. Was pregnant 3 months after starting acupuncture, and taking the chinese herbs that the acupuncturist prescribed. Definitely worth a shot if you can find a good practitioner experienced in fertility.

cocoachannel · 07/01/2011 19:45

Clearblue fertility monitor and acupuncture worked for me and my one fallopian tube/ erratic cycles (post EP).

BabyValentine · 07/01/2011 20:02

I second TCOYF by Toni Weschler - 'tis a revelation!

emoo777 · 07/01/2011 20:09

With my first pregnancy it took a while and it finally happened when I made it my health and fitness cycle (good for the mental battle of TTC as well as the physical one), then went to Paris for the weekend and left my thermometer and fertility monitor at home! Good luck! xx

bloomingnora · 07/01/2011 20:34

Marilyn Glenville's website. Don't get hung up on conceiving around day 14 or even particularly close to ovulation! Sex every 2-3 days.

MainlyMaynie · 07/01/2011 22:02

It took me years to conceive. I was taking:

agnus castus
vitamin b6
inositol

I'd been taking the agnus castus and b6 for 18 months and they had definitely sorted my cycles out. I was taking the inositol for about 6 months, which is how long it's supposed to take to work, so I am pretty convinced that helped. I was also following the South Beach diet and exercising very regularly.

I'd read TCOYF ages ago and would recommend that too. Fertility fried is good too.

How old are you? If you're 30 plus, I'd go and have day 3 and 21 blood tests at the Dr. Good luck.

paddypoopants · 07/01/2011 22:11

Took 8 years to conceive ds. Only happened when we had giving up and gone a long holiday.

crochetcircle · 08/01/2011 08:18

Good luck. I'm sure you will make it. First remember that couples with no fertility issues often take a year or longer to conceive - don't put yourself under too much pressure. This is hard to remember, especially as friends, acquaintances etc conceive at the drop of a hat, but it is true. And it can vary even for an individual - a friend of mine took 2 years to conceive her first and then her second took just one month!

Anyway, here are the things I learnt during my ttc journey.

I had been taking ibuprofen (same as nurofen) in the early part of my cycle, the follicular phase, for arthritis pain. I'd been taking it for a couple of years, on and off. My GP advised me not to take it in my luteal phase when we started ttc because it wasn't advised in pregnancy. However, some research I did after we'd been ttc unsuccessfully for months indicated that long term use of NSAIDs (of which ibuprofen is one) can cause temporary infertility (I can find the NHS link if you are interested - it was a proper health warning, not a one off internet reference) and some research had found that it affected the development of the egg in the follicular phase. Long-term use means taking for months, regularly each day - not one-off use for period pain etc I don't want to worry anyone unnecessarily. Anyway, we fell pg the month after I stopped taking the tablets.

The other thing we did which was useful was find out roughly when I was ovulating (using OPKs) - this was helpful as I had thought it happened 4-5 days later than it did, so much of our efforts were misplaced. Having said that, we didn't then 'time' sex on the ovulation day. In fact, what seemed to work best was having more sex in the week before ovulation. Both cycles I conceived we swi'd every other day from cd8 and I really didn't worry about getting one in on the actual o-day as I knew we'd always have a couple of swimmers around.

Other posters have said 'act pregnant' whilst ttc. But I personally found that when I tried this it added to the pressure and stress, the more so when it hadn't worked as I'd had a very boring month! So neither me nor my partner did this. We were healthier (drinking a bit less, more fruit and veg, brazil nuts for my partner) but I didn't look after myself as if I were pregnant.

I am sharing all this in the full knowledge that there is no 'magic bullet', no guaranteed way to get pg. I thought I had ttc sussed after I conceived our first. Which we sadly lost to MC @ 11 weeks. TTC second time round was much harder as I felt like all I had to do was repeat what had worked before and I would fall pregnant. Of course it doesn't work like that, and you can't reproduce everything that you did in a given month, and I was very disappointed!

Good luck again. You will get there.

Jaffacake76 · 08/01/2011 10:18

Clear blue fertility monitor worked wonders for me. I didn't find it stressful to use and we just made sure we did the deed on the high and peak days. Prior to using this, I thought I knew when I was ovulating but clearly I didn't because within the first month of using this I got pregnant.

Good luck x

CrapBag · 08/01/2011 11:58

Unfortunately, stopping worrying about it was what worked for me.

Tried for 3 years with DS, me and DH both had problems so were told IVF was our only option. 3 weeks before we were due to start, I was pregnant. I distinctly rememeber thinking "fuck it, if it doesn't happen now we are getting treatment soon anyway" and that is the night I conceived.

This time, my doctor told me due to me having endometriosis, it would probably take a while again and we should ttc earlier than planned (was planning to wait until DS's 3rd birthday). We thought we had better get on with it, not expecting anything. I conceived on the first try and am due 9 days after DS's 3rd birthday.

Stopping thinking about it and worrying so much does seem to make a difference, which is know is far easier said than done.

My friend was obsessed by it last year, to the point it was driving me mad with her talk of when she was ovulating and how she was putting her legs in the air and how she would wake her DH if she had been out that night but was ovulating. She chilled a bit and went on holiday and conceived straight away.

Another friend of mine also swears by acupuncture.

stargirl30 · 08/01/2011 12:01

DD took a while. She was conceived after we basically gave up trying and I got a new job. We also booked a holiday. I had also started taking B vitamins, don't know if that got me anywhere.
Am now expecting DC2 who was conceived pretty much straight away!

WiiUnfit · 08/01/2011 12:03

Hi FXXX, I can only wish you the best of luck & hope you get your BFP soon! :)

CrapBag · 08/01/2011 12:21

I also got on with things after putting stuff on hold and retrained for a new job as a TA. It was during this I got pregnant, in fact it was just after they told me they were looking at their budget to try and keep me at the school after initially saying they don't keep students (the school had a lot of students and I was forewarned they don't offer them positions after).

mum295 · 08/01/2011 12:56

Took us 3 years to conceive DD. We eventually had one round of IVF, which failed.

After failing, we went to see our consultant who told us to make an appointment for a few months' time. And go away and forget about it until then. So I stopped taking the vitamins, started drinking again, stopped exercising and threw myself into work. I was pregnant a month later!

Similar story this time. At the start of 2010 our GP said to give it until end of the year to conceive before she would refer us back for IVF. By November we'd resigned ourselves to failure, I didn't do an ovulation test, we has sex on the wrong day...bingo! I had also just done a massive pre-Christmas shop where I'd treated myself to a large bottle of Bailey's and lots of my favourite white wine. Not to mention that I'd just treated myself to a load of new clothes...

The key for us seemed to be to relax and forget about it, and also for me to put on a few pounds in weight.

Good luck. It's so hard hearing about others' pregnancies whilst you are struggling.

FXXX · 09/01/2011 09:05

Thank you sooo very much for your golden nuggets! I'll try and relax a bit then! Also will supplement with agnus castus and multivits. Really needed the support here of you lovely girlies- as in RL I don't feel I'd get any sympathy: friends and family falling pregnant "accidentally" quite a regular occurrence! Thankyou very very much. I am very grateful.

OP posts:
gherkins · 09/01/2011 09:22

While supplements etc can of course help, the most important thing is to track your cycle. It's all very well having a regular 28-day cycle - but this doesn't mean you are actually ovulating on Day 14 (as many doctors would sadly still have you believe).

Doesn't matter what you're doing diet-wise or supplements-wise, if you having sex at the wrong time in your cycle, nothing will happen.

The only way to know when you are ovulating is to track your cycle using a temperature chart. The very best book on this - as others have said - is Toni Weschler's Taking Charge of Your Fertility. It really is excellent (about general women's health as well as ttc issues) and I urge you to get to grips with this, as well as simply trying supplements etc .

Good luck!