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Pregnant at 43 - peoples reactions?

43 replies

Dooberry8683 · 31/08/2005 12:19

I am 43 and have just found out I am pregnant again. I'm in shock but starting to come round to it now. I have a 22 year old son and a 12 year old
son so my family is really spaced out! What I would like to know is whether any else has any experience to share about peoples reactions and how they felt having a baby at this age. Also is it normal to show so early? I am nearly 8 weeks and my stomach has really grown already. I have actually lost weight though because I have cut down on the chocolate etc recently.

OP posts:
Trin · 31/08/2005 12:31

Hi im 22 years old. Im six/seven weeks pregnant and people say you can tell im pregnant as my tummy has a little buldge and i have been eating healthly so its not fat.
As for you query about peoples reaction about having a baby at your age is no ones buisness but yours!!! age does not matter!! as long as your happy about being pregnant it doesnt matter what peoples reactions are.People can be judgemental so as long as your prepared for that. Having a positive attitude helps!Congratulations!!!!!

Dooberry8683 · 31/08/2005 12:34

Thnxs Trin, you are right about it being only my business but it would be nice to have other mums to talk to about it etc but I doubt if there will be others my age at mother & baby clubs etc!!

OP posts:
Prettybird · 31/08/2005 12:39

You'll be surprised!

Things have changed since you had yours (as I'm sure you know !) - and the average age for having babies is now much older.

More babies are now born to over 30s than under 30s!

When I had my ds at 39, I might have been in the upper range of the ages at the ante natal class - and I wasn't the oldest one there!

ninah · 31/08/2005 12:40

well mine is - Congratulations!

Trin · 31/08/2005 12:41

Well nowadays people are getting pregnant from the age of 15 which probably doesnt help the way you feel. Just keep thinking that your going to be a mummy again....this is your last shot at pregnancy and if i was your age and in your situation i would be over the moon. I would also think like you re: mum and baby groups.I would probably go swimming on my own instead or go to parks where you can meet people rather than enter a room where people can be least you can go off on your own if your at the park if you feel uncomfortable.

Littlefish · 31/08/2005 12:44

I think it's absolutely fabulous!!!! I had my first child 9 months ago when I was 37. I would love another child and hearing stories like yours gives me hope!


mumtosomeone · 31/08/2005 12:46

What is there to 'think' wonderful news!

Littlefish · 31/08/2005 12:47

Also, just to reassure you, there were 3 other mothers I met at our local baby/toddler group, and we were all aged between 36 - 43 with very small babies. Also, I think that having a new baby breaks down barriers between ages anyway. You are all going through the same experience whether you are in your twenties, thirties or fourties.

The only thing that used to make me feel old was being referred to as an "older mother" by my midwife and consultant!

Dooberry8683 · 31/08/2005 12:48

I just feel that theres nothing worse than being isolated when you have a small baby, you need other mums to chat to. I dont have any family around. Still you never know . Midwife cancelled my appointment so god knows when I will get to see anyone!

OP posts:
Twiglett · 31/08/2005 12:50


I think you'll find lots of mothers your age .. or near your age .. although many of them will be first timers

oo I'm jealous

mumtosomeone · 31/08/2005 12:52

had my 5th at 38!

grumpyfrumpy · 31/08/2005 12:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mumtosomeone · 31/08/2005 12:53

age is just a number!

trace2 · 31/08/2005 12:55

I'm jealous

Littlefish · 31/08/2005 12:57

NCT has been great for me. Their Bumps and Babes groups meet regularly for pregnant mums and babies under a year in my area. It's been a great way to meet other new mums as I didn't know anyone else in the area in the same situation.

I also became very brave about chatting to other mums at the local doctor's surgery and arranged to meet them at the baby/toddler group.

CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 31/08/2005 14:00


I had my first at 36 and am trying to concieve again (I am 38 now)

I saw more mothers over the age of 35 than under when pregnant.Is not the other way around.

And as for what people think? Who cares!!! It will be wonderful and your family will be jumping through hoops v soon!!

aviatrix · 31/08/2005 15:50

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Message withdrawn

moondog · 31/08/2005 15:53

Great news!
Wow,aviatrix,your first at 45! That's fantastic!
My colleague had a baby a few months ago at 45 (she has a 15 year old too). She is loving it so much,she has just extended her maternity leave.

Kidstrack2 · 31/08/2005 16:15

Maybe its twins!

motherinferior · 31/08/2005 17:01

Congratulations. Well done. I had my two at 37 and 40.

Papillon · 31/08/2005 17:04

Work collegue of my dh - he and his wife had another baby 10 months ago.. she is 50 years old - next closest sibling is 21!!

aloha · 31/08/2005 17:08

Second at 41 here, and nobody batted an eyelid - and I mean nobody. Not even the drs and midwives. In fact they talked to me about 'next time' quite matter-of-factly (their idea, not mine!).
Lots of mothers our age about these days. And certainly don't stay away from mother and baby groups/swimming etc because of it!

aloha · 31/08/2005 17:10

Nobody was remotely 'judgemental' about me - what on earth is there to be 'judgemental' about? Join the NCT if you want to meet other mothers.
I was huge all the way through. Still am !

BLANKfloozypuddingandpie · 31/08/2005 17:12

Congratulations, I think it's fantastic!

pacinofan · 31/08/2005 17:19

Dooberry, many, many congratulations to your and your family, great news. I have just had a BFP at 38, we are really chuffed and not at all bothered about being 'older' parents.

My stomach is just starting to swell slightly, and overall my clothes are a bit tight. I am only 6+2 but I was exactly the same with my first pregnancy, I showed quite early and finally carried an extra 3 stone. Am hoping I don't put on as much again, it was hell to lose!

All the very best, and enjoy your pregnancy!

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