Refusing to poo in potty or loo

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Hi,
I think this is a fairly common problem so I'm hoping for some tips on how to deal with my 3 year old son's refusal to poo in the potty or on the loo. He's doing great with weeing on the loo but goes into hysterics if I suggest doing poo there and grabs his nappy. If we're out he won't tell me he needs a poo and does it in his pants.

I've tried lining the potty with a nappy, and bribery but neither worked.

Any tips most appreciated!

Thanks.

Another one with poo-issues!

Started training DD 2.7 yesterday.

We had tried before but she wasn't ready and I just took the approach that she'll instigate it when she's ready.

So yeasterday she trotted off and weed in the potty. I was amazed!

Not one single accident all day, nappy on at the las inute before bed and off straight away this morning. succesful wees this morning so far too. (Except she spilt it from the pot on the floor!)

My only concern is that she hasn't done a poo. I'm reluctant to give her a nappy as I dont want to regress beens it has been a success so far.

I know she needs one as she goes quiet when she wants one and I've reminded her of her potty, it'd be great if she could poo in the potty blah blah special trwat but just says no.

I know I'm only on day 2, but I don't want her to get tummy ache and get poorly.

Also a bit baffled about how you go out? i need to go shopping one day this week so do I just put pants on her and take spare clothes and go to the loo in the supermarket every ten mins?

At the min shes just running around with nothing on her bottom half, I'm worried she might think her pants are a nappy substitute

i take that back.... shes just done a poo in my shoe brilliant!

We had 6 poos today in pants at nursery. I could cry.

We havent had any since the one in my shoe!

In case this is of any help (copied from another thread):

We had a similar problem with DS. In the end I bought a selection of cheap plastic tat small toys from Tescos, put them in a bag. Showed them to DS and said he could choose one if he did a poo on the toilet. Worked a treat. I think actually seeing the prize on offer rather than just promising it is sometimes more effective for young children.

DS is 4 in a few weeks and has been dry/weeing on the loo for 18months but will not poo on the loo. He hates it and it makes him cry the times he has done it.
We are at our wits end and have spoken to the doctor and health vis. HV suggested blowing bubbles on the loo an having stories etc, this got us off to a flying start but things have regressed since he started pre-school in Sep.
The blowing of bubbles can help start a poo off if they are about due for one which is great. My hub tried tickling DS's knees while on the loo today and the giggling prompted a poo. So we know he CAN do it, he just does not like it.
HV said the most important thing is to not make a deal of poo pants, and also to do any bottom cleaning in the bathroom and of poss put poo from pants down the loo to reinforce the idea that poo belongs in the loo.
She also said use a reward chart with wee stickers but have special poo stickers. I hope this advice helps someone cos it really helped us til we lost momentum. We're hanging in there and buying lots of very cheap pants - life is too short to be scraping poo off upto 5 pairs of pants some days.... good luck!

my dd1 was the same. she used to hide when she did a poo in a nappy so i placed her potty near my dressing gown that hung down from a hook on the door. i showed her hoe she could hide behind it hen she did a poo in her potty. it worked and after a few goes she stopped putting the dressing gown over her

hi
New on here and having the same problems some of you others are re not pooing on the toilet.
does anyone have a copy of poo goes to pooland they can e-mail me? I have looked for it on-line but for some reason it won't print.
I have been recommended it by another Mum who said it works really well!
thanking you all in advance!!
Emma

Hi new on here as well i'm having the same problems withmy daughter who is 3 she will not poo in potty or toilet I must change her at least 5 times a day she goes to nursery in the afternoons and she has accidents there the teachers r really good and do change her but I have tried sticker charts promise of a toy but she does'nt seem bothered when she does one all she says is I have pooed my pants it used to really upset me but the last few days I have just calmly asked her why and she says I don't know also I don't what to do anymore she's even done it in the bath. HELP

Wow! I knew this was common but didn't realise HOW common- makes it much easier knowing you are not the only one with this problem. DD is 3.1 and we started potty/toilet training a couple of weeks ago. she has been dry with no wee accidents since day 5 but will not poo on potty or toilet. She had a poo at nursery on day 2 and then held it for several days, despite getting upset with her 'tummy hurting' and trying to get a nappy out to poo in (felt very guilty not letting her). Eventually, after lots of weetabix and several doses of califig she did go at nursery -they noticed her 'walking oddly' and she had just started so they plonked her on the toilet to finish. Since then she has simply held it until she goes to bed and then does it in her nappy. Bizarrely she sometimes pulls down her nappy to wee in her potty but then replaces it to poo!!
Have got a copy of'Poo goes home to Pooland' and ordered a new steps/seat combo for toilet so hope this might help!
Might try choc/new toy bribery too as a last resort - not too worried but she does need to be clean and dry for her new nursery which she starts in Jan.

Thank goodness there are others in the same boat, was just thinking I was doing this all on my own. My 3 1/2yr daughter has been potty trained (wees only) for over 16 months but has always refused to do poos. She always waits until she has a nappy on at night or if it's during the day asks (screams and cries) until I put one on her. She has never pooed in her pants or ever done it at nursery, she certainly has great control. I have tried bribery and everything under the sun, I'm fed up. When I ask her why she doesn't want to, she just says she'll try another day or when I"m big like you arghhhhhhh. Any help would be appreciated.

Quick update - bribery and new seat/step didn't work! BUT when I went to tuck her in last night before I went to bed she had done a poo in her potty!! Hope it's not a one- off but is promising nonetheless. Hopefully now she's done it once she will do it again!

smiley have you got a copy of Poo Goes Home to Pooland yet? I have a pdf I could email you.

Can i join this thread please. Im currently in "potty poo hell".
DS is 2.9 he will do a wee on his potty no problem but when it comes to the poo hes in hysterics. Ive tried every bribe that i can think of but nothing is working. He only does 1 poo a day, normlly straight after breakfast so i get the potty ready. But hes having none of it. This morning we had tears from both him and i (im nearly 8 months pregnant so very hormpnal), i just dont know what to do. Needless to say i put him his nappy on and within 5 mins it was full. Yesterday i didnt put his nappy on at all and he held the poo in all day which gave him a sore tummy. Do i just carry on as i am and eventually he will do a potty poo or is there something else i should be doing

HI Wildbillhickok - yes, I have thank you but so far no luck! Besides the one poo in the potty there have been no further successes in that area! However, she remains dry so at least that is going well - even if still only on the potty except for at nursery.
Missnatalie - my dd is 3.1 and refuses to do a poo unless her nappy is on which has also resulted in witholding and tummy aches :-( she waits until bedtime and goes in her nappy then.

"Link to kingsizepeople.co.uk/img/Poo_Goes_Home_To_Poo_Land.pdf Poo goes to Pooland"

Link to Poo goes to Pooland

Can I join the thread too please?
We're having the same problem with DD (3.1). She uses the loo to wee with no accidents at all, but when she needs a poo she asks to have a nappy on. She won't even try going on the potty or loo and will hold it in until she gets her own way and has a nappy on. She's quite happy for the poo to then be put down the loo and flushed away, so she knows that's where it's meant to go, but point blank refuses to try to go sitting down. Argh.

We've just had a breakthrough with this - I read him Poo Goes to Pooland and he was quite happy to try it, he seemed really taken with the idea of the story.

Now every morning after breakfast he sits on the toilet with his toilet seat on there and his feet up on a stool, and either reads a book or plays with his little Vtech game while the timer is set for 5 mins.

Every day he complains and says he doesn't need to go, but each time he has done a poo. I do tell him it doesn't matter if he goes or not, it's still 5 mins on the loo to tell Poo its OK to go to Pooland, and being distracted with the book or game helps.

Since reading him the book and talking about it he has not had poo pants apart from 1 day. which is a vast improvement from everyday without fail, more than once a day usually.

I really think the book is the thing, and time on the loo/potty with no pressure just to get into the routine of it.

Hi, we're having exactly the same problem, little boy is 3 years 2 months and been toilet trained for wees since September no problem, but still won't poo on the potty or toilet, just does it in his pants, it's really getting us down. Just tried to follow the link to Poo goes to Pooland but couldn't find it, does anyone know anywhere else where we can get this from. We are desparate!! Going to try the bag of toys trick too.

Im in exactly the same boat here! It is so nice to see that it is not only me that is going through this! My son turned 3 at Christmas. He is doing wees on the potty now no problem, but refuses to do a poo in the potty. He gets really upset, runs around and gets hysterical. He holds it, or goes in his pants. It is very upsetting to see him so stressed. Iv tried to follow the link for the Poo goes to pooland story but it wont come up?

Oh, so nice to know we are not alone. My ds is now 3yr 4months. At 3 we had this problem then gradually he just sorted it himself ( after countless dvds about potty training and reading books!) but over the past week he has started pooing in his pants again and today also wet himself in nursery so spectacularly that his shoes are even in the washing machine tonight! I thought we were done with this and am v. depressed! He doesn't seem bothere and being cross just washes over him. Nursery are very unsympathetic; we had quite a few run-ins with them last year when he started and I am dreading it starting all over again. Could it just be tiredness from starting back or a wee bit of rebellion at going back to nursery after holidays? Am out of ideas!

My 3 year 5 month old is going to school in september too.. so i feel the clock ticking, especially with no2's!

No1's - we're mostly ok... 80% dry... more down to laziness I think, and being stuck into play or tv...

No2's... hmmmm... loads of accidents to be honest... and it's been 3 weeks now... and she has done one No2 in the potty! We were soooo pleased with her... and she looked terrified at first, bless her... but, then was really pleased.

Bribery, bribery, bribery! I am truly ashamed of my bribery skills! A sweet for No1's at first.. I don't give those now... and then chocolate for No2....

I will not wash poo filled pants, as everyone says.. poo hands for the rest of the day! I get pants from primark.

I will not put her back in nappies for No2's... we will 'ride it out' and stay relaxed about it and just keep plodding on.

Weighing everything up.... my little girl is doing soooo well and she has achieved so much in just 3 weeks... and even takes herself off unprompted with no1's.... i am so proud of her... and i'm concentrating on that... if she got it for no1's - she will get it for no2's.. it's just going to take her longer.....

focus on the positive... and just keep plodding on... and don't wash poo filled pants... sole destroying! head off to primark!

Can I join? My DS who is 3.4 Is refusing to do a poo in the toilet when he is with DH and I. He has been dry day and night for 4 months but in the last 6 weeks the poo thing has become a real issue. He is withholding for up to 3 days at a time with loads of hopping from one foot to another and loads of skid marked pants. I'm at my wits end and am ashamed to say I have completely lost my temper a number of times. DS is fully aware of what he is doing as virtually every other day he says 'I'm going to do a poo in the toilet for you today because I know I'm making you sad'. I could cry as it is starting to stop us taking him out in public because the hopping around and squeals of pain as he needs to go are just too much. Is there any point in seeing a doctor or health visitor about this? Is there anything they can do?