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Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

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Original poster

Those with late potty trainers - how old were they?

46 replies

MamOfTwo · 10/10/2014 13:12

If you had a late potty trainer, how old were they when they cracked it? DD is 3.7 and despite attempts she just can't seem to get it. I even took her to the doctor the other day in case there was something medical preventing her from doing it. GP didn't seem worried and said she will do it in her own time. So, just wondered if there was anyone out there whose child trained later than 3.7?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Piratejones · 12/10/2014 08:01

4 for wees and still regularly using a nappy for poo at 6. although he has some "additional needs" so I'm not sure it's relevant to your situation.

Sparklebum · 12/10/2014 08:17

3.5 here. Had a few attempts before and she just wasn't ready. started at beginning of Sept and not had any accidents since week 3. I'm glad I never pushed it with her as we've only had 3 or 4 accidents. She just wasn't ready earlier.

Nancyclancy · 14/10/2014 12:06

My dd is 3.5 and showing no signs of ever being ready!

northyorksbelle · 14/10/2014 20:13

I began the horror story potty training with my first ds just before he was 3 (an attempt at around 2 1/2 ended as he just wasn't ready) and we're still on the journey now 2 years later. He is not quite 5 yet but has started school which has stirred something in him as there has been a massive improvement and although not quite past the post just yet I would say we're probably 95% there.

The trauma has been almost too much for me and I've said before that should ds2 or ds3 cause me such pains I will be leaving and seeking asylum in deepest darkest Peru with the family of a young brown bear I know.

chutneypig · 14/10/2014 20:19

DS was 3.9, a clear year after his twin sister. He showed no interest at all. In the end his sister pushed it with preschool, by putting some pants in this bag. Preschool thought we'd put them in and started during the day - I'd not wanted to bother them at that stage as they'd only just started there.

That said, he was dry at night within weeks and his sister still isn't. They're seven and we've just been talking about tackling that. She doesn't care either. Sigh.

Original poster

MamOfTwo · 10/11/2014 18:09

Thanks for replies. Bumping my threads in case they help anyone! We have started training again and although we are making small steps of progress, still feel there is a very long road ahead DD just doesn't seem to have the signal that says "Ooh, I need a wee". Ho hum

OP posts:

northyorksbelle · 13/11/2014 20:13

So cancel any suggestion I may have made about cracking it. The boy surrounded his brother in droppings in the bath tonight and tried to blame his brother (his face was still a little pink from the exertion!!) for doing it. We're technically into the third year of this stupidness and I don't think I can take it much longer.

Piratejones · 14/11/2014 07:57

Ah, my heart goes out to you, i had a similar incident when mine were 4 and 10, which put an end to them bath together.
Please try not to panic, he's 4, it's not the end of the world and you haven't failed.

hugoagogo · 14/11/2014 08:08

Ds was exactly four, it was hell.

On reflection I wish I hadn't tried to get him out of nappies at all; because when he got it, he got it overnight.

Piratejones · 14/11/2014 12:16

?I wish I hadn't tried to get him out of nappies at all; because when he got it, he got it overnight.

How much less stressful would that have been!

northyorksbelle · 14/11/2014 14:03

Overnight? Are you practising voodoo?

KatherinaMinola · 14/11/2014 14:08

Yep. About 2y 2m for poos, and 4y 1m for wees. As others have said, when she got it she got it, and was fairly reliably dry in the space of three days.

My view is let them do things in their own time.

hugoagogo · 14/11/2014 15:13

No voodoo or I would have done it when he was three and I was expecting dd.

I am just saying I went through months of misery and he did too I think, expecting him learn, but he just couldn't or wasn't interested in being dry.

Until his fourth birthday when he said he wanted to be a big boy and wear pants in bed. I let him and he never wore a nappy or pull ups again and has never wet the bed.

dd decided she wanted knickers when she was nearly three, she only wet the bed once at-Nanny's house.

Squtternutbaush · 14/11/2014 15:43

My DS was 3.8 years.

I stressed and tried to train him a few times before then but eventually I just stopped buying nappies, 3 days later he was dry and soil free then after a week he was dry at night too.

He never used the potty though went straight to the toilet.

Original poster

MamOfTwo · 17/11/2014 11:55

Sorry to hear you've had a setback Northyorksbelle. May your younger DSes be a dream to train!

OP posts:

eversomuch · 02/01/2015 21:53

Empathizing. DD is almost 3.10 and still refuses to try. Will wear underpants OVER her nappy, but never the other way around, and will never go completely without a nappy. Her preschool thinks I need to push. DD says she'll do it when she's 4 ... At this point, I guess there's probably no harm in waiting another 2 1/2 months and saying, OK, now you're 4, let's do it. But I'm really frustrated with all the resistance.

ICantDecideOnAUsername · 03/01/2015 17:07

Ok, I came to ask the same question. DS is 3 years and 2 months. We've been trying since the summer. He was doing quite well at first would go on the potty/toilet seat regularly and pee/poo on there. But since then he's gone back and forth a few times from point blank refusing to sit on the potty/toilet seat to going on when we took him but he just can't tell when he needs to go, or even when he's gone. Today we decided to put him in pants; we're on the 6th pair of pants and last clean pair of trousers. We've been setting the alarm for every 30 mins but, even when he peed 25 mins before he will always beat us to it. He did 3 pees in an hour.

It doesn't help that his younger cousin was fully potty trained almost a year ago and all his peer group are all potty-trained too.

flamingtoaster · 03/01/2015 17:12

Both DS and DD were over three. I didn't "train" them at all - just offered pants or nappies at intervals once they were about two and a half. When they finally chose they each had one accident and that was it. Be patient she will do it when she is ready and it will be stress free. Interestingly enough both DS and DD once out of nappies needed to go to the loo much less frequently than earlier "trained" friends.

willowisp · 03/01/2015 17:31

I'm afraid I think it's very lazy parenting not potty training.

At the very least put a pair of pants under the nappy so they know what wet feels like.

Also think of the money spent unnecessarily

My DD's were 2yrs & 3 mths. Dd1 had a milk habit that kept her in night nappies until 3, but dd2 was dry at night immediately & refused nighttime nappy.

alix89 · 04/01/2015 16:18

that's a brilliant idea putting pants under the nappy as my son has no self-awareness and doesn't really understand when he is wet. I will be trying that out as i'm wanting to get my son potty trained ready for April when he starts school

AnwenP · 05/01/2015 14:37

I am also looking for advice in this area as my son is 3 1/2 and we have been getting nowhere with a softly softly approach or if we take off the nappy altogether. He does not care if he is sitting in wet or dirty clothes and denies even that they are wet or dirty. He shows absolutely no interest and won't even really sit on the potty at all (and refuses the toilet completely). The health visitor just told me to do a week without nappies. But my experience with training my older one (and doing this very thing with no success and plenty of misery) was that it got my absolutely anywhere and they just do it in their own time. Any thoughts? When I tried this no nappy for a week method with the older boy he was about 7 months younger so I wonder if the additional age will make a difference here? I have to respond to the comment above about being 'lazy'. I would do absolutely anything I promise, but you can only open an unlocked door.

yomellamoHelly · 05/01/2015 14:49

Ds was 4 y 8 m. Dd was 4 y 6 m. Both just clicked with it straight away after initial accidents at start of day. Neither wanted anywhere near a loo or potty until they were ready. Both had forewarning it was coming (once I got that feeling it was worth a shot) - so some time to get used to the idea and what would be expected in terms of pants, wiping, washing hands etc. Night and day at same time with both. Ds literally had 2 or 3 accidents in total. Dd probably 15-20 (so less successful).

GoodEggMightMaterialiseAnytime · 05/01/2015 14:51

Ds is not 3 until March but just reading this thread has made me feel better as it seems everyone else we know is trained at his age. We have had one no nappies attempt but at day 3 had made no progress whatsoever so have decide to wait and try again in a few months. The pants under the nappy idea sounds good though as he did want his pants changed when he could feel they were wet so improved awareness.

eversomuch · 05/01/2015 15:02

Well, yesterday morning, completely on a whim, I told DD that we would try her underpants under her nappy. I had suggested this countless times in the past and had faced much resistance. This time, though, I decided I wasn't going to budge. She refused and cried for about an hour, but finally did it.

I had originally intended to do it for just one try so that she could feel what it was like to be wet. But after her first accident, she put on another pair of pants. I waited to see if she'd demand a nappy over it again, but she didn't. She stayed in pants all day, with about 6 accidents over the course of the day and only really freaked out when she did a poo in her pants just before bath time.

Today, she's in pants again. She so far hasn't done anything in her potty or in the toilet I think she's still a bit afraid of that but we have gotten her to sit on the potty without her pants on a few times. I'm really hoping she's start using it in the next day or two.

I think she's holding her pee a lot, but she's not panicking about accidents like she used to do and seems pretty accepting of the whole process this time.

I'm so excited ... but also feel cautious, as it could all backfire any time, LOL.

She's 3.10 now. I really hope this is the start of the end. AND I'm hoping DS, 26m, will be inspired and start trying the potty out too.

2015 WILL be the year we become a nappy-free home! Woohoo!

BTW, I bought her loads of different underpants just before Christmas, and I think she's a little excited to try them all on, so maybe that's played a part in her willingness to try. Sometimes she wants to change her pants when she hasn't even wet them. I also got her lots of new track bottoms (she doesn't do leggings), and she likes trying them on too.

The potty we bought two years ago is a bit small for her now. Can anyone recommend a larger potty for bigger kids?

Lucked · 05/01/2015 15:11

If I was to give advice it is that I wished that I had left him naked more in the summer, I think if he had to poo wearing nothing and he had got used to that feeling of free air and possibly seeing it it would have been better. Other than that the usual advice of planning for at least a week at home - I took annual leave.

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