October 08 - Ooh fancy that!

[CantSleepWontSleep]

We filled up a thread without even noticing!

Primary school outcome for dd today . They say that the emails will be sent out by 6pm (though may take longer to get through to us).

very true, myjob. Well said. I don't htink we want or need for anything, either. What frustrates me is that it's so hard to save. Once Q is in full time school, we'll be able to save more once again so it's only temporary. Just a shock to the system.

Pistachio I shop ocado and am very tight budgeted about it. If dh wants meat, he does buy it as extra but that's rare. Some weeks it can get up to £55, but we try to keep it as close to £40 as possible. I try to limit extra food shop trips to a max of £10/week - like when we walk to the shop to get something extra/a top up or a treat...etc.
Now that Q is drinking less milk we don't run out of that so quickly. He eats a sandwich for lunch most days and I don't really usually eat lunch but have a juice or smoothie or something at work. DH doesn't eat much for lunch either except on weekends as he doesn't really even get a proper break for it... well, he does, but he has so much to do for the NQT stuff.

Oh! re: PLanning permission for the loft.
We emailed the leasehold company to find out... they never replied. Despite 5 or 6 different emails! Then DH decided it wouldn't really be worth it and I agreed because there isn't really enough room for a safe staircase, even if we took out the hallway closet and linen closet.

pistachio, you poor thing! I take it you opted out of the 10K run? I cannot believe you even thought it was an option to do it in your state!
What do you usually have on your shopping list, pistachio?

As CSWS says, I'm now about 35 miles up the A1 north of London. Close to a station, so i can be in Kings Cross in 40 minutes. I loved Hackney, but I agree its shockingly expensive. I wanted a garden and couldn't afford one there (by literally about half a million quid) so we decided to move back home.

Star the whole second child in nursery is a quandary... I want to do it because it has worked really well for Emma (although its not a given that it will work for the next one). Part of me thinks that we will just have to work something out that will get us through the next few years. In all seriousness, we do spend a lot on food as we don't plan very well (and we do have a lot of chinese takeaway) and we have had some pricey holidays... also i do have some savings so i think it must be doable.

sorry you're still feeling poo pistachio... good thing you decided not to run!

I have found ocado to be just as cheap as tesco if I get "essential waitrose" brand. I'm not tempted to buy so much extra crap, either. We get spices in bulk from a shop not far from us and they are super, super cheap and last for a while. I also got the as many deliveries in one month as you want for £9 which saves a load on delivery charges (I do delivery because it's a huge timesaver for us and I'm sooo tempted by extra deals and getting more and more of stuff when I'm actually IN the supermarket). Berries are pricey. I try to just choose one for the week, but always buy apples or pears, bananas and grapes. Others when in season/deals are good. I got frozen spinach for the first time this week... is it worse than fresh? I don't eat it so much but Q does and we buy a bag of fresh spinach every single week and he gets through it because I cook it in various foods for him (he just loves spinach for some reason ).

As for pasta, a bag of pasta will last the 3 of us at least 2 if not 3 meals. A 500g bag of rice will last many meals - I only buy rice every 3ish weeks and we eat rice quite a bit. Lentils last a while, too.
Roasted Veg is a new fav of mine to make I find it's not too pricey though if I just buy bulk of all veg.

sorry more vitamins in fresh, then?
3 punnets of berries! Poor Q. I am mean and make him survive on one. lol. In the warmer weather when they are cheaper we get loads more of course and he gets through them all. I thought he'd turn into a blueberry last summer.

We also have a local pick your own farm at a local garden centre that is sooo fun! And those berries are all really cheap when you pick your own. We pick loads and freeze some even sometimes... but we go so often there is no need to most of the time.

Star - only read up to page 12 of discussion, but you rented in Earls Court - so did we from 2002- 2004. Warwick road, v noisy, and incredibly expensive.

Bizarrely the last house we rented in London was sold when we moved out. It was an extended terraced house, small 3 bed, small garden and sold for 630k. Far more than we bought our 4bed house for in Hampshire . London prices are absolutely obscene, even now......

at managing to spend only £83 a month. We spend more than that just on fruit and veg!

Ekka we lived on Courtfield Gardens (aug. 2004- aug. 2005), so a very very quiet part of Earls Court, not as noisy as Warwick Road, but still very expensive. It was a studio in a large Victorian property that had been transformed into many studio apartments (mostly students - dh was studying for his MA at kings at the time in London). But still was £750/month for just the one room that included our bed, a small sofa thing, wardrobe, tv, kitchen area, mini bathroom. Then there was council tax to pay. I can't believe people pay more than that now... crazy!

interesting that frozen has more vitamins. That's handy!

With our groceries, one thing is that we do not waste much at all. (only the bits that Q decides to spit out or refuse). I feel like when we were less careful with grocery spending, we wasted quite a bit more just from food going bad or from making more and not eating all the leftovers..etc.

Yes we're guilty of the wasting too much thing star. Yesterday I threw away a whole packet of chicken thighs that had gone past their use by date .

We used to do that all the time... pretty much weekly a whole thing of fruit or veg or bread or yogurt or something past it's use by date and getting smelly would be chucked in the bin.

When I was home on ML and I had more time to think about home stuff, I looked carefully at what we eat weekly and that started the less waste, less spend on our groceries.

Speaking of being at home... it's interesting because I've commented on a thread on MN about this woman who wants to give up work and be a sahm and I know a friend in America who is thinking of the same... it appears to be for similar reasons but I don't know the whole story of the MN person. Anyway, my friend in the US is saying she's just tired of being exhausted all the time from working and wants to "relax" more and be at home (she has 2 dc 1 in half day K, one is a toddler). It would mean serious cut in their income and they would also have to move to reduce their living costs as necessity. She's quite used to spending as she pleases as well and would no longer be able to do this. She said she doesn't mind and just wants to have a "break" from it all and be a sahm.

I keep saying "just do what's right for you and your family" but I feel like she's going to very very quickly realize that being a sahm isn't about "relaxing" at all! She's still going to have to get older dc to and from school each day, entertain toddler, do housework...etc. AND to make it worse, her dh doesn't want her to do it and is stressed about the financial implications... this isn't good either.

Much like the thread on here, she thinks she'll also get a part time minimum wage job in the evenings, say, 7-12 or 6-11 a few nights a week. I don't think she realizes how tired she's going to be after a day of looking after dc!

Obviously, I can't say anything because it's a personal choice, but once she does it she can't un-do it as jobs aren't that plentiful at the moment. I just want her to THINK about this carefully and then if she still wants to do it, then do it. But I just think she's wanting to stay home for the wrong reasons... it will not be a relaxing fun life and they will be very, very financially stressed as well.

Would you say anything? She's a friend I've known since we were 5 if that makes any difference. We can say anything to each other, just this is so sticky.

maybe I should have put that on fb... but I don't think she even knows about MN... but you never know! ugh.

Oh pistachio You poor thing!!! Glad your mother is there.

In my case, I find a day at work and then at home harder than a day at home. BUT, I only have 1 child and I work with children all day long regardless of whether I'm at work or at home and don't have the tedious paperwork and meetings along with it at home. However I know that if I did become a sahm, it would be bloody hard work, not a "break from it all" in any way, shape or form.
You're right, I can't say anything... but she's in for a huge if she goes into sahm thinking that it's going to be a "break".

Gosh star - I had a relatively high powered and highly paid job with long hours and lots of stress before having children, and I find being a sahm much harder than that was! Would her employer consider allowing her a 'career break', rather than her leaving altogether, so that she can test the waters without burning her bridges?

That's a good idea CSWS. I go to work for a break from children to be honest. It's easier only having to think about one person (me) than thinking for 4 of us - or 5 if DH is there.......
I had the results of my CT scan today - all clear so they don't know what or if anythings wrong with me. Booked my hernia op (woohoo)
Went to the new underwear shop in town and had a bra fitting, was wearing completely the wrong size - but I knew that anyway! Came out with 3 and I'm really pleased as I've lost prob a stone and a half since I bought my old ones - can you imagine how spacious they were .

pistachio - am glad you went to the doctors - hope you feel better really soon.

Sorry you're poorly too Myjob. We do an online shop about once every three weeks and it's usually around £70. Then we get a weekly veg box delivery and top up things like milk, yoghurt and fruit. I definitely shop more cheaply and efficiently when i'm organised enough to meal plan.

I definitely find being at home easier than being at work but I'm sure that's because I only have one child and that I don't do it every day. I still wouldn't describe it as "relaxing" though. The thing I found hard about being at home full time wasn't any one particular aspect (apart from the lack of sleep, but that's still difficult) but it was the seemingly endless treadmill. I still sometimes feel that I'm constantly loading up the washing machine/mopping the floor/wiping the high chair down etc etc. Can your friend find a way to reduce her house and regain a bit of work/life balance Star?