October 2007 - these little piggies are growing up fast!

[alicet]

Ok so a pretty boring thread title but thought we needed some distance from the last one!

Morning everyone,

Choc - Just let us know if there's anything we can do, anything at all.

Feeling tired today, we didn't have a bad night but I was awake for longer than i'd have liked to be so still feel tired anyway. Hopefully I I can get a nap this aft, have been managing to most days

Showering when dh isn't here not so easy though, I can't think how to do it?! If I leave Miles in the bouncy chair then Dylan 'cuddles' him a lot which is mostly gentle but sometimes he leans on him a bit too much so I can't leave them unattended... I could wait till the afternoon when Dylan is napping but by then I need a rest at the moment what with getting up in the night. I'm just having t shower at lunctime or in the evening when dh is here. I'm just blabbering on really, this is a minute problem in the grand scheme of things!

How is everyone anyway?

Anyone have a shouting toddler at the moment? I swear Dylan shouted for about 90% of yesterday instead of talking, I know it's an attention thing but I can't get him to stop, he just ignores me when I tell him no shouting and carries on... my poor ears!

Dal I know what you mean about the showers. Something so simple can have such an impact on your day though. I always feel better after a shower, no matter how little sleep I got. Have you tried bringing the bouncy seat into the bathroom while you shower? I used to put a DVD in for Sofia, and put Marco in his bouncy. The sound of the water (white noise) combined with the vibration setting used to put him to sleep.

I also have a screaming toddler. She shrieks for fun and it goes right through me. How she can get her voice that high pitched is beyond me... but soon all the neighbourhood dogs will be yelping with her at this rate . Not to mention the constant meltdowns Took her shoe shopping and I dont know what the problem was, but she just started yelling "NO!" at the top of her lungs and crying. Of course that got the baby started... then I had DD1 trying to yell over the noise at me about not finding the size she needs and can I help her. I felt like running out of the store and leaving the lot of em there to scream it out!! Then DH wonders why I hesitate to take them anywhere on my own! When I had the first two, I went everwhere with them. But I dont remember them being difficult as these last 2!! Sigh...

Choc - lots of hugs - no experience to offer advice I'm afraid - others will help you so much better. Take care of yourself - you know we're here if/when you need us. x

FT - ((hugs)) about Alex stopping bf at night - mixed feelings for you I'm sure. Can't have helped that he didn't want the singing/kissing either. Anya frequently tells me to stop singing - usually when she's in full flow herself it has to be said. What was the fb thing? I didn't notice anything?

Dal - hope you managed to get your nap. Anya is very loud too much of the time. I try and stand well back but yes it's a bit deafening when she's standing on my knee yelling in my ear. I would second having Miles in the bathroom and having something else to try and occupy Dylan.

BB4 - what a nightmare in the shoe shop! I'm sure you handled it well - that would drive anybody mad.

Now that's spring's finally arrived I'm trying to tackle the greenhouse effect that goes on in our house. I've ordered some film to coat the windows in the back bedroom that's supposed to reflect (or absorb?) 95% of the heat from the sun. It'll be wonderful if it works - that room's unbearable in the summer - then Anya can have it as her bedroom. I've still got tonnes of junk to sort through first though. Keeps me busy!

Funeral director has advised us not to see dad, police had his body too long and it is not in a good way. Just had to rush out and buy an outfit for tomorrow. Will be glad when tomorrow is done.

Choc So sorry that has happened. Hope you will be at peace with it though. Sending you lots of love, hugs and strength for tomorrow.

Choc - Probably for the best if that's the case. Sure tomorrow will be an emotinally tough day. Will be thinking of you (((hugs)))

choc I'm glad the funeral director advised you against viewing his body in that case...my Mum had to identify my dad for the post mortem 4 days after he died and she says it she is glad my brother and I weren't there (we would have been if she had told us about it)as it is a memory she would have preferred not to have. I will be thinking about you and your family tomorrow...I hope it goes as smoothly as possible. ((((hugs))))

ps Bachs Rescue Remedy was a great help for me in the same circumstances.xxx

Choc-Really am thinking about you and will be tomorrow. You know where we are if you want to talk or simply to let off steam xx

Choc - hoping that you are ok, and that tomorrow goes as well as these things can. will be thinking of you xx

Just a quickie from me...

Choc thinking of you tomorrow honey... Here for you if you need me xxxxx

Dal I used to put Adam in the cot under his mobile while I went in the shower - he was happy (not for as long as Sam used to be but would give me 5 mins) plus he was safe from Sam's effusive affection!

Another one to try is to bring Dylan into the shower with you? My boys LOVE this!

News from Choc - a second dd Charlotte Emily. Fab news! Was going to visit in hospital on Tues but she was discharged that afternoon. Will go and see her in the next couple of days and report back...

Dal if Miles prefers bouncy chair to cot / mobile could always put bouncy chair in there?

Hi Alice Tell Chochobnob big congratulations from me

Sorry I've not been on, college work and other stuff in the way, am still reading though. Will try and get on properly soon.

Love to all x

Thanks for the tips alicet

Yeah that's what i'm bothered about, Dylan's 'cuddles', he is really gentle but occasionally leans on Miles a bit much and squashes him! I used to just put Dylan in the bouncer as you say but I fear Miles would not be preotected enough in there.

The cot idea is good, also the shower idea, think Dylan might like that!

NC don't suppose you could pass this missing Dad info round to people you know given that you live in Hull could you? He is the cousin of a lady on another forum I go on.

Dal I take the babies in the shower with me all the time. I have a small plastic container of bath toys in there (My shower is quite big), and they LOVE it! Either DH or I will take them in, and the other parent will take them out to dress them. But I have managed quite easily on my own. Sofia will sit wrapped in her towel while I get Marco sorted. Its also quite good when they have stuffy noses and the steam clears them up for a while.

Enjoyed a nice afternoon today. The weather is taking a cold turn again at the weekend so wanted to get my park time in. Of course Sofia had her regular meltdown when I tried to get her into the stroller on the way home. She was yelling so loud and for so long, that all the people passing me on the trail were giving me those looks!! LOL. This little girl is going to be a pain challenge as a teenager!!

Speaking of weather, is that big volcanic cloud affecting you ladies??? There was a big story here in the news today.

BB4 - Ah that sounds cool! We don't have a big shower, it's just over the bath iyswim but Dylan could come in.

Glad you had a nice afternoon even though it involved a meltdown , poor you, it's so wearing when they do that!

I think lots of flights are canelled due to the volcanic cloud or at least they were yesterday.. That's all i've heard so far.

Choc- Thinking of you xxx

Choc Thinking of you. Hope your day has gone as well as can be expected.

Inzi Your story about Jane seeing the 'man' really gave me the creeps!! Italians are very superstitious people, so I grew up with all kinds of 'ghost' stories. I believe in that sort of thing, but it still makes my skin crawl. When my Oma passed away 9 years ago, I was with her in the hospital when it happened. I then had to go home to an empty house (as DH was working late). I went to bed and slept with the covers over my head thinking 'please dont haunt... me please dont haunt me'!! I loved her like a mum, but the idea of a 'visit' would scare the pants off me!! Hopefully its your grandad with Jane. As long as she is not troubled by the 'visits', dont let her see that it bothers you. As for the meltdowns, you have my sympathies. Its become a regular thing when we go places now, so I am starting to get used to it. Sofia has a very strong personality and can be quite obstinate at times.

How is everyone else?? Looking forward to a nice weekend. We have a birthday party tomorrow evening, and I am going dress shopping during the day. Have 2 weddings this summer, so I need clothes to wear. Since I can fit back into my usual size 10, it will be fun to shop!!

Alice-Already done, horrible story, very strange too, hope he's okay.

Inzi-Shannon does it all the time, she seems to have conversations in her head too, singing, talking and nodding her head a lot. She had a long episode of it on the bus, people looked at me like Also she keeps saying 'I love you' randomly-not to me!

Choc-was thinking of you today.

Hi everyone else, hope you're all okay. Goit to go get something to eat before I waste away!

Choc - hope today went as well as it could.

Alice - great news about chochobnob - send her our congratulations.

NC - hope you're not getting too stressed!

BB4 - glad you enjoyed your afternoon in the park. Yes, all our flights have been suspended for at least a couple of days because of the volcanic ash. Can't see anything though.

Inzi - awww at the wardrobe for George How exciting. at 'there is a man' - it's probably just her imagination kicking in big time - it's a good thing, she's going to be really creative . As long as it's not scary things she's seeing I think I'd go with the flow.

Anya's really struggling to go to sleep tonight - probably because she slept before tea. She's started doing that over the last week or so - I think she's doing a bit too much most days now that the weather's nice. I'll have to reintroduce some chill-out days.

My window film arrived today - it's a really wide roll! I might possibly tackle it this weekend. Or possibly not.

Thanks again girls, service was lovely. I read a story which gave me something to focus on. Helped to think of it as an actng job so kept it together until that was done. Lots of lovely people there and we raised money for a charity which was nice too. Just feel sad now really, very sad.

Inzi I had hoped Dareh might see my dad, I think they are so sensitive at that age. Yesterday he asked for a bannana and as we were peeling it it broke. He sobbed like it was the end of the world and we could not comfort him. Never seen him so upset, suppose he was picking up on the tension in the house.

Morning Ladies

Choc Bravo you for holding it together. It is terribly sad after the funeral...all that shock and grief and having to organise things and everyone coming round to offer condolences and wanting it "over" and then suddenly it is and you are left feeling alone and empty and just so ((((big hugs)))))...I think you said you still have a "memorial" to face tomorrow, I hope that is a lovely service too. I'm sure Darreh is picking up on the sad atmosphere.. not a lot you can do to help what you are feeling but you can try to show him that it isnt the end of all joy and try to have fun with him even if you dont feel like smiling yourself....I feel very strongly that Alex was affected by my grief when he was in utero (I was 10 wks pg when my Dad died) as he is such a serious little boy and seems to laugh a lot less than other the 2 yr olds we know...now, when I feel a wave of grief starting I deliberately start playing with Alex ... it seems to help (or perhaps it just helps me)

Alice Thrilled beyond words for Chochobnob. So glad that she has her second daughter after the tragedy last time and I'm still sorry she doesn't still post...(it was the work collegue stalking her that stopped her in the first place wasn't it?)

BB4 the shopping spree too...as to the volcanic ash it has been a real pita for us. Dh and I spent the whole of Fri trying to get 4 clients from Holland back home (got the last 4 berth cabin on the Hull-Zeebrugge ferry) and getting 2 collegues in Germany back to GB whilst getting 2 German collegues over here back there (Getting them all foot passenger tickets on the Dover ferry (no car places left) sending the Germans down to Dover in a fleet car and hiring a car in Germany to bring to Calais so they could swap), We couldn't help the collegue stuck in Finland since Thursday..he wont get home until Monday at the earliest. Nice change to see skies free of vapour trails though ... and to see the small planes and microlights out playing (thumbing their noses at the grounded jets)

Inzi Alex either isn't such a sensitive child or hasn't got the imagination to see things but I can understand how it could give you the creeps...but from what I gleaned from the spiritualist minister I met she will only be seeing people who are close to her and mean ony good...it is a comfort to me that he told me that when my dads time came his father and grandfather would be there to meet him ( the minister didnt know who they were but gave me their names and described them perfectly) I'm sure she is only seeing someone who loves you all and means only good.

Long day yesterday at Dhs cousins' wedding, a very lovely day but tinged with sadness as his Dad died 3 yrs ago and his Mum died 6 months ago...they were very much missed... Alex wasnt invited and getting everything sorted for Mum to babysit most of the day took some organising...they seem to have had a good time together though. Another busy one today...dhs grandads house needs blitzing and so does my Mums garden....have a lovely day all.

hello ladies

choc - glad the funeral went well. I can completely empathise with what you say about 'acting' the reading. I did one at my brother's funeral and I felt like I was on autopilot just reading my words from a page. It wasn't until afterwards that I could really engage with the sentiments I was trying to convey. I would have been in pieces otherwise.

I'm sure your reading made a big impact on everybody and you did your dad proud. Sorry that you have seen your sadness reflected in dareh. Agree that it is unavoidable; they pick up on everything going on around them and there isn't really a way you can shield them completely from upset. Big love to you all

inzi - my healthy eating this week has involved so much crap. But at least I am sick of chips at the mo! I'm of the mindset at the mo of hey ho - what's another stone or so in the effort of losing weight. Only another month of diet Nah am going to try and keep it in check a bit

BB4 - am with you with having a little strop artist! We're going to pay for it more now cos have given in so much over last week on holiday (yeah - sweets? here you go son. Have em all )

FT - hope mum's garden is demanding more of your attention rather than grandad's house. Yay another luvverlee day! Enjoy the sunshine all

Ah am still a bit in jolly holiday mode. And thinking of moving to cornwall (ta for fb comment FT) But hey - will not be rushing there straight away. Enough going on at the mo.. but nice to keep in mind eh?

Floria we decided against the memorial in the end. We didn't want to go through it twice. On my way home now, back on Wednesday to do more stuff in the house and then on sat to scatter the ashes.

What was it like speaking to the spiritualist guy? First time I have ever thought of doing something like that myself.

Thanks again for all your support this week, it has been a big help.