NOV 09 - once the lights are out and the last baby has arrived safe and fine, see you here on cloud nine!

[Broodzilla]

I've just realized we're now under the "being a parent" header. I've got stage freight!

Morning all

Ioan went back to waking up at 3am yesterday so feeling better today! Think I might start using infacol as he's very windy, it's just remembering before each feed that I struggle with!

Still struggling with this ruddy cold. Headache and sore throat every morning, sigh. Maybe I should take to my bed?!

Had a lovely day with Mum yesterday, crackers with dinner and everything - proper Christmassy! Nativity tomorrow morning

Having pains during bf so have started a thread here - if anyone has any advice I'd be grateful as it's getting worse.

So much for "this could be the start of Anya sleeping for a longer stretch at night"- Ha! She proved me wrong last night thats for sure! She woke at 2.30 and was awake until 4.30. Granted, it was dh who got up with her, but he was huffing and puffing so much about her not going back to sleep that I ended up lying there awake too . Then she woke again at half 5!! Little madam. Need to have words with her today methinks!

We are now attempting to get organised for our 2 week trip to Ireland, which is not easy with a 2yo hwo wants entertained and 5 week old who refuses to sleep! Give us a break guys!

Morning! A beautiful day in oxfordshire, but v cold.

becky Lucy looks like she's smiling when she falls asleep on me after a feed. It's not a conscious recognition of her mama, but still melts my heart every time.

Can I ask a q about bed-sharing? I've kept Lucy in bed with us for the past three nights, as she gets off to sleep better. Well, I do, too. We're both on top of the duvet, dh under. While feeding she's on her side facing me and that's how she falls asleep and stays all the time. Should
I be changing her position so she's on her back? I'm worried about her spine. And is it ok to have her on top of the duvet, is this not too soft? Thanks.

HI everyone,

Thanks for your reassurances and congrats. It helped me feel less alone! It's a lovely day in NW london as well and I'm determined to get out for a 10 minute walk by myself this afternoon. We decorated the xmas tree last night which was a lovely bit of normality as well.

skorpion Baby Bean does the same - it's a lovely glimpse of what his smiles will be like in a few weeks (I hope). I too have been doing some bed sharing - DH goes elsewhere and Bean sleeps in his section, sans duvet and pillows. he ALWAYS rolls on his side though and I was wondering the same about the spine...

Are all your newborns sleeping on their own in cribs/baskets? My family and in-laws are putting pressure on to put him in his crib for all naps and sleeps and to let him cry if he doesn't like it. That doesn't feel right to me so young but am I making a rod for our backs? Any thoughts would be welcome.

I'm also curious as to how this feeding on demand thing turns into any semblance of a routine, but I'll see if reading back through your messages on this thread holds any enlightenment!

TOK - good luck with the packing! scarlotti off to read your thread about breast pains.

Sassmonkey you do what you feel right re. sleeping don't feel pressured by family, etc. I try to make Toby sleep in basket for naps and at night but don't let him cry except a few niggles. Luckily at night he settles in there really well with no niggles but naps are hard work. I sit next to him and shusshh him to calm him down and rub his forehead to close his eyes when he gets sleepy and it takes a while and lots of patience but usually work. In the early evening though he is very niggly so he sleeps in the sling then. My mum used to put a radio at the bottom of my cot tuned to radio 4 to send me to sleep. Even now I find radio 4 soporific!

Agree with BBL sass, don't give into pressure. We just did whatever worked. With ds, he would sleep no where but in his bouncer, so that's where he slept for the first about 5-6 weeks. We took it into our bedroom at night. I checked with the hv at the time because I was worried that he wasn't lying on a flat surface and she said it was fine. The first few weeks are exhausting enough as it is! Once you start getting out and about with your ds and he starts getting used to sleeping in different places like in pram, car seat etc, he'll probably be fine in his moses basket. Being close to your baby is best for you and baby if you're bf anyway. xx

Esme is in my bed too, and I think she moves aroudn enough to not worry about spine etc. She turned on her belly last night. Unless i was really out of it, which is possible.
She also does these really really cute fat little belly laughs when she sleeps, ever since she's been born. I've seen her at it a few times, and its soo adorable.
Otherwise we are waiting for a major snow catastrophe.... and I really wanted t oht the shops, but no good now. I am obsessed with buying boots and a nice trench coat even though no use as slumping around in pjs all day and weight is going up uprettily due to xmas cookies....

oh yes! meant to write, if you haven't tried swaddling in a while, give it a whirl. Esme is 5 weeks and I didn't swaddle but tried it last night as she was scratching her face. She slept like a rock! Well, for her. Also she had warm hands when I unwrapped her, which was nice.

I swear by swaddling. All my babies have loved it. They get frightened by their arms twitching as they fall asleep so if they are swaddled this doesn't happen. They look a bit like a caterpillar in a caccoon though but the theory is that when they were in the womb they were tightly scrunched up so that's what they like for the first few months of life too.

Another advocate of swaddling here too Ioan only likes it though if his arms are folded on his chest, rather than by his side. Have to say I haven't bothered since he's been in his grobag but then his hammock almost swaddles him.

Think he must be a bit poorly as he's slept constantly today. He's literally only been awake for an hour this morning. Hopefully this won't mean problems sleeping tonight - I'm so tired with this cold I could sleep for a week!

I've just had a nap ... sooo tired. Scarlotti I've got a chesty thing going on too - coughing all the time! Perhaps Ioan has your cold comig on?

Fed up of being ruled by sleep all the time:mine and his when will it get better?

Going to make mullled wine now. DH and DSs still in town doing last minute Christmas shopping. I was supposed to go to but I was dead on my feet and pleaded the need to sleep.

Saw mw again today, LO's lost a tiny bit of weight so the shields are not working well for her. We worked on the latch again and she's since fed on each bare boob with better results. Please let it be us turning a corner...

bbl mulled wine sounds fab, hope you managed to rest.

scarlotti here's to a good night.

Mulled wine does smell nice

hi sass!

Well done you and welcome to your little monkey! I know what you mean about feeding on demand never becoming a routine but Rosa has almost sorted that by herself and she's only 2wks & 2 days. She feeds lots through the morning but has a nap late morn to mid avvo, then a long nap in the late afternoon usually til about 9pm. then we have a feed and a play then it's off into the nighttime cycle of every few hrs (between 2.5 to 3.5 usually but did have 6hrs once!) Sure will change soon but q liking at mo

Dream feed? must have missed this - feed while they're sleeping if you've woken but they've not is it? do they then sleep on?

Got grandpa driving from scotland to oxford tomo - nightmare! Anyone know where is snow forecast?

Sass, welcome and congratulations! It is really hard at the beginning, isn't it! But it does get easier! I'm feeding on demand too and there is clearly a routine. In fact, it happened rather quickly but it helps if you try to keep your days regular. For example we go for a walk each day at the same time if possible.

Question: Which bouncer brands are good? There are so many different ones and really a wide price range. And for how long can you use them?

Sidelying is okay, I think - one of the midwives at the hospital put Arthur down on his side, and I still do it when he's windy. I asked the HV, and she said that on the back was better than on their sides, but on their sides was better than on their fronts.

He's now got his first cold, poor love - and I went out last night to DH's Christmas party and left him behind, so am wracked with guilt. I didn't realize he was properly sick, he just seemed a bit snuffly and grumpy. When I got home, he was all piggy-eyed with misery and snot, and had thrown up Calpol twice all over my sister. He then ran a fever for half the night, and cried and coughed and snuffled and cried in my arms. Am very tired today, and he's spent most of the day sleeping, but he seems better - much less snot, thank God. However, I suspect that the routine we were painfully establishing has gone entirely out the window - I'd JUST got him sleeping from 10.30 until 5.30...

Paula has been sleeping for almost the whole day. I don't really know why, she doesn't seem to be ill or even unhappy so I am not really worried but it is still strange... I hope it will not be an endless party tonight.

Sass, just wanted to add - survive the first six weeks by any means necessary, and then you should look around and find things look better. And after twelve weeks, they DEFINITELY do (for people who aren't hit by postnatal depression, that is - everyone, do keep an eye out for it, it's VERY treatable!)

tamlin poor sausage, I hope the worst is over for him now.

sass I do not want to jinx it but would say get help with the latch as soon as pos. It seems to have worked for us today, i can't believe it.

Thanks for the wise words about surviving first 6 weeks. Had a wobble today when 'i couldn't make my mind up whether to give Lucy a bath, sort of how am I going to be a good mama if i can't even decide about stupid bath! I want my normal hormones back now, please.

Have a good night everyone.

Another bad night for us!!!! I couldn't get to sleep until 2.30am because I was over tired and the longer I was awake the more anxious I felt. I finally conked out then Toby woke at 4.30 really cranky. He fed then slept until 6am and was really restless and cranky until we got him up properly at 7.15am. Today I feel like a proper zombie from the planet of the living dead.

When will it get better? Six weeks? Two weeks to go then Who was it that said the sleep thing is problematic 5-6 weeks - well for us that is very true!

Tamlin poor boy. It is hard when they are poorly so young as they really do get it bad. I hope he feels better soon xx

Skorpion you are doing really well - keep at it and I'm pleased the feeding is feeling a bit better

Morning mums! Sorry to hear some of us are having a tough time. Sass I can only echo what the other ladies have said. Take each day as it comes and it will all work out fine

Tam sorry your little one is poorly. Hope he is brighter today.

We're having wakeful nights here. The hammock works for the first couple of hours of the night and then he wakes and wants bf and not happy to go back to his own bed afterwards. He settles much better on his side as well. There are a few of us with this laying position, makes me feel more relaxed about it. He is very grouchy and hard to please the last 2 days, he doesn't know what to do with himself. He seems to have lots of willpower, takes after DH. BF is going fine. But have noticed the fullness of the breasts has eased and they seem much softer. I have heard that some women think the milk is diminishing when this happens, which isn't the case after reading up on this. It appears our breasts start to store the right amount of milk for baby.

I'm in a cycle of DS feeding often at night, so a formula top up is given before bedtime, doing this seems to help him settle and get 3 hrs sleep before the next feed. But the formula seems to play havoc with his tummy, very runny stools and lots of it. I seem to spend each morning changing lots of nappies. Have tried various formulas and they all seem to have the same reaction. It's all trial and error in this house atm.

Talking as a 2nd time mum. It's not any easier doing the baby thing again. We might have more experience but every baby is different.

Both DS's are sleeping and relaxing so I'm off for a nice shower. Step Nan is cooking us roast dinner today - yum!

Typing one handed AGAIN and its slow!!

Congratulations Sass. Things do get better I promise. With DD1 the first two weeks so so hard and I didn't ever think it would get better but it did. Have found this time a bit easier but still have moments of desperation.

Think Leah might be having a growth spurt. She is 5 weeks today and wants feeding a lot and sleeping a lot too. Nighttimes are interesting (in a very exhausting way) as she desperately wants milk but then guzzles too quickly, gets frustrated and goes to sleep instead then wakes up a bit later etc etc. Getting very tired now. Let er sleep on me for a couple of hours in bed earlier as I just wanted some sleep. Got backache now though

Morning everyone.

Rough night here - I'm so tired, I can barely remember it though. I'm sure I fed 3 times in 6 hours and he wouldn't settle in his cot. The only positive is i tried swaddling and it seemed to soothe him a bit. will keep at it.

Thanks southernbelle. I can't quite see what's going to change to make things better, but I will keep the faith that something will!

Yesterday was a pretty good day - he had a couple of long naps and I had some time alone with DH. I had an outbreak of despair in the afternoon (think it was linked to the sun going down?) but other than that, was okay.

Fruitpastels, your situation sounds so familiar! Ahh, it does help in the dark of night to know I'm not the only one up pacing the floors sometimes in exasperation. I don't know why Baby Beans fed so frequently but not fully last night. Maybe he's having a growth spurt like yours, southernbelle.

Ladies, do you wake your babies up in the night if they fall asleep at the boob or just capitalise on the sleeping? Midwife told me he needs ot be offered both breasts because he's so big, but that requires a goodly amount of effort to get him awake. Also, do you put the babes in a dark room for daytime naps? Ta.

skorpion, I'll see if I can get a lactation consultant over. Where would I find one?

6 in-laws are en route here now to inspect the baby, one of whom is an 8 year old hellraiser. Wish me patience.