June 08- the shoes, the food, the glamour!

[pureeandpearls]

Struggling to load pages these days and saw we were over the 900 so took the liberty of starting a new thread.

BDQ - sign up for e-mails from Ryanair and then you always know about the deals 1st.Nigel's just been to and from the UK for 2 Euros return!!

I am in mourning tonight, I have spent the last 2 days compiling my order for clothes for us all from the M+S website as they were doing free international delivery - well they were until today when I went to complete the order AARGH. Costs £12.50 to here so it's a bit steep. But apparently if you sign up to M+S on facebook you get a voucher which probably would cover the postage but I can't find the right group - I keep getting weird S+M groups instead! Anyone know which group it is?

hi to everyone else, I have Cadburys chocolate, English magazines and a new cardi(which he chose) from Nigel's trip to the UK and this morning I bought a trolley's worth of Shreddies, rice crispies and cheerios from the shop near the airport.

Update from estate agent, they should be receiving the offer today or tomorrow from the buyer.

BDQ - also sign up for a Halifax Easycash account - it has a Visa electron card and it's the only one Ryanair doesn't charge for so that will save you a bit more.

You put it in bold because you were highlighting the fact that you're visiting a very special place as there was a major battle there in 1356. I certainly appreciated it.

Seriously, at a lovely holiday to look forward to!

Great news on the new coats (and !) and also on the MA Ktpie - Neenz, is it also good news on your MA and job? I got all confused and lost track of that one!

Sybil really hard to know what to do about the crying - but I have some experience because my brother was a real crybaby at school (and it led to problems with bullying ). Thing was, my Mum sort of encouraged it - she had two girls, and then a boy who she didn't really treat much differently and encouraged him to express his feeling etc. But he happened to be quite sensitive (still is, he's a good lad, my brother ) and was a crybaby. But it's impossible to tell what came first IYKWIM, the loads of crying or the encouraging to show feelings - maybe he would have been a crybaby all along? It's great that his teacher and friends are supportive. I don't know, it's impossible to say - I was going to say 'don't encourage it', but then I wouldn't want a child bottling everything up. Er, maybe it's just a phase? Not very helpful though.
Rolf was it necessarily bad? Some of the things sounded like normal children's behaviour (including aggressiveness). I'm not dismissing, though.

Not much to report here - DH just went back to London. Iestyn has been quite tantrummy (sp?!). Our particular problem here is throwing things, including food. For fun - he laughs every time. We try not to, but I did crack up when he threw a pea and got it into my Mum's ear.
Actually, I have one other problem but it's a bit embarrassing. Iestyn slaps me - but just me. (No complaints from nursery, he doesn't do it to DH or my Mum or Dad.) He will come up to me and slap me on the face, often twice, and he always does it with a determined look on his face (not smiling or laughing). It's odd and painful when he's holding Farmer Mark (he made my nose bleed with Farmer Mark ) or other toys. Thing is, I don't know why he's doing it - he does it when we're playing etc, not when I'm ignoring him! - but also I don't know how to stop it - I've tried ignoring, I push him off/grab his wrist and say no. Why me and nobody else?

Lol Deb, maybe you should check your facebook preferences...

Just marking my spot- e still up have only just stopped working but long weekend tomorrow and deb and her facebook groups and essie and her farmer mark issues have made me giggle .

I wouldn't laugh, Poppy. Farmer Mark has a sinister side.

Essie - S has taken to hitting me too. Very odd. And sore! I didn't know about the battle so will research it some more before my hols.

S also has a tendency to throw his spoon/cup/plate (unless I get to it first) on the floor to indicate that he's finished with it at mealtimes. We're trying just to ignore it at the moment (unless he's doing it in a tantrum, in which case he gets a firm NO) and hope that he grows out of it.

Ta for the tips on Ryanair Deb - have just signed up for offers!

I'm going back to work tomorrow. Hurrah! Apart from anything else, I've single-handedly spent the country's way out of recession.

Battle of Poitiers, 1356 - a major battle in the hundred years war with France. Something tells me that guns were used in battle for the first time. It was the second of three victories - the third being Agincourt.

So the hitting - just you, and quite, well, I don't want to say agressive but it's determined?

This is Farmer Mark. He joined me in the shower the other day, the dirty fecker. (Our version has scratched goggles because he was wedged behind the radiator. He has more exploits than James Bond.)

Yeah, it's not playful or malicious, but quite strident. My p's have bought that very quad set for part of his Christmas - I think maybe I should get them to send it back

just marking my spot, have got left behind of late. will try to do better.

had my swine flu vaccination today - AND seasonal flu vaccine - occupational health must have been doing a two for the price of one deal. the swine flu one definitely hurts more.

C is also having tantrums and throwing things. SHe has also taken to pinching my neck occasionally when I am carrying her. it hurts [hmmm] we're going with a firm 'no' and then putting her down immediately.

Waves to viva!

Deb your facebook mishaps have me picturing M&S-cardiganned ladies in gimp masks .

Essie did you scratch Farmer Marks' goggles to protect your privacy in the shower?

THanks for the nice sensible comments about parents' evening. Like Sybil, I feel a bit of a fraud. By and large everything was v positive and these are things to just keep an eye on. I'm lucky that I was able to speak to the head about DS1 so it's flagged up as an issue.

Back from looking at the last school for the boys. We've seen a mix of private and state. Blimey, I'm glad that's all over. We've got a bit of time before making any decisions so I'm hoping to shelve it for a while. I can't exactly announce to DH that I'd like him to push off and earn lots of money to pay private fees (actually, maybe that's exactly what I should do?) so I don't want to form a strong view about them just yet. I find this the most tricky bit of being a SAHM. if i was earning I could participate in the conversation in a very different way, but because I'm not I'm very careful not to sound as though I'm saying "well darling, I've thought about it and I'd like you to go and earn more money please". How do the other SAHM's deal with this? Are we just particularly dysfunctional?

Debs - no idea about the M&S group? Did you find it yet? I don't dare have a look for you for fear of what I might see!

Essie - tantrums here too but no hitting (yet, don't give him ideas).

BDQ - J is very keen to pass us his plate when he finishes, you need to be quick to get in there and take it from him otherwise it gets tipped all over the place.

Rolf - I kind of know what you mean about OHs earnings, I do find myself sometimes daydreaming that DH would go out and earn loads of money, then I remember that actually his job gives him a good work/life balance and we can get by fine on his salary so I'd rather that than him out working all hours and stressed and earning loads of money.

Have got confused now about whether I will get the MA, on the form it adds in an extra criteria of having to have stopped work to have the baby, now I didn't really do this as I quit before I knew I was pregnant. But I could perhaps argue that I quit work to bring up a family? I don't know!

Rolf I read the last line as "are we (SAHM) just particularly dysfunctional?" and I was about to say yes but then I saw what you meant. And yes, I am worried about the whole financial dependency, not because I feel bad spending DH's money (I know that I'm earning my share and he really does appreciate that I've quit work to keep the kids happy) but because I'm so dependent on how his career goes and I hate that extra pressure on him.

Oh and Fraser is a total tantrum machine too - he has a regular breakdown midmorning as he wants BFing and I'm refusing except at bedtime and first thing in the morning. I think it's an age thing...

J sometimes slaps me when he is bfeeding. Actually what happens normally is he tries to grab my collar-bone (very ouch as he tries to get all the way around it iyswim), and I stop him and then he flails around and slaps me. It has happened a couple of times recently. I told him no, very sternly and then he got very annoyed, stopped feeding and walked away in a strop giving me one of his 'special' looks. I think that is all you can do really.

Rolf but the money does belong to both of you. You are a family and he earns that money only because you selflessly gave up your career to enable him to have both a happy family life and the career he wanted. This is what i tell my dad what he moans about 'poor dh, who works long hours and still has to ask me if he can buy new golf clubs (insert appropriate gadget)' I could go back to work. But then he would have to get a job where he didn't do long hours and overseas travel (in short a job he'd hate rather than the one he currently loves). And he'd have to do half the housework and a lot more childcare. Money is something you need to talk about as an issue in which you both have an equal say regardless of who brings it in to the house. I look after our kids 24/7 but if there are decisions to be made about their health/schooling etc DH doesn't get less of a say than me because he is not their carer. It is, in essence, the same thing.

Sorry, that was a bit of a rant! But the whole 'he brings in the money he gets the say' thing really pisses me off. (My dad does this to me all the time, can you tell I'm at the end of the line with it?) You enable him to make the money. It is family money and should be discussed as such. Just as the kids are parented by both of you even though you do all the work.

essie - A hits me on the face as well. He thinks it's funny though unfortunately (don't know if that's better or worse). Even if I'm really stern he still laughs and hits me more. He is also a thrower - throws food, plates, cups, cutlery and his favourite is throwing all his toys out of the cot. Hopefully they'll all grow out of it

rolf - agree with sybil

essie - lol at the poitiers history. I'd never heard of it

Am so annoyed, was waiting for a boden delivery for 7 weeks, it came back into stock but I can't collect it as the RM collection office is obviously closed

essie - A hits me on the face as well. He thinks it's funny though unfortunately (don't know if that's better or worse). Even if I'm really stern he still laughs and hits me more. He is also a thrower - throws food, plates, cups, cutlery and his favourite is throwing all his toys out of the cot. Hopefully they'll all grow out of it

rolf - agree with sybil

essie - lol at the poitiers history. I'd never heard of it

Am so annoyed, was waiting for a boden delivery for 7 weeks, it came back into stock but I can't collect it as the RM collection office is obviously closed

The battle of Poitiers was in the Hundred Years' War - it's a bit of history rarely talked about and most people haven't heard of it. Odd, really.

I'm annoyed at RM too - my replacement wraps were not delivered yesterday but went to the sorting office. That's always a nuisance because the sorting office is in Bangor and at an inconvenient part of the town too (there is a sorting office in Llangefni and I'm there every other day, and pass it). Anyhow, I drove there on my way to work this morning, but once I'd committed to the back road it was on, I discovered a big picket line with banners and everything. I was annoyed (because I want my nappies! ) but then all these postmen started cheering because I was driving by and they were all shouting at me to hoot. So I did, and gave the impression of supporting a strike which I don't support at all.

Mind you, that versus boden - you still win, Allnew.

Lol Rolf, yeah, I blinded Farmer Mark. Joking aside, he's been a favourite from the beginning. (It says from 18 months but Iestyn is obviously gifted. ) We're going to get the farm with Mark's parents on it (!) for Christmas. Actually, seeing as he's the farmer's son, he's probably a Young Farmer, which explains everything.

Happyland- yuck.
RM- double yuck (although clever interweb people who have temporarily switched to UPS/Fedex/Citilink etc -Hurrah!)
Hitty-type children- triple yuck. I have a friend with twins who is suffering with this. Is there any advice I can offer her? I just have a child who won't eat anything except bread.hhmm]

Sorry- suffering from what-will-I-do-without Masterchef-itis....on plus side, I've had the curtains fixed and am off to a 'house-cooling' this afternoon (prepping for Amber's housewarming She waves to you all by the way)

Viva- as you are a 'health professional' what is your professional opinion on whether I should have Swine Flu vaccination?

I love happyland! C's favourite things are the duck and the telephone box though - interesting combination!

puree my personal opinion is that it was bloomin' sore and I couldn't lie down on the arm last night, which was annoying as it's the side that I usually sleep on. As for professionally, I'm afraid I'm not au fait with the guidelines for the vaccination in pregnancy as I'm not involved in the vaccination programme, I would discuss it with your antenatal team as I think they have been briefed. On our paperwork yesterday, we had to declare pregnancy status and they were diverting pregnant people to speak to GP/obstetric team in the first instance.

I was so pleased Steve won masterchef, he was great!

BDQ [viva waves right back attcha]

whinegums how's work going, you've been quiet recently, i assume you are busy preparing for the house move?

Sybil great post - thank you . I think DH and I need to be a bit more grown up . It comes up every time we row (we have a little hit list of about 3 issues which always come up . It's so much nicer when we get along. At least with the school thing we actually do seem to have the same instincts and opinions about it. Education is one thing about which we are of one mind

Essie I've heard of the Battle of Poitiers! Do I win? We have several bookcases devoted to that period .
Is Farmer Mark a Young Conservative?

Arghh the thread has run away from me. I have been reading but not managing to post.

Deb - great news on the potential offer. Fingers crossed.

Essie - change institutions (academic that is). Sorry, that probably isn't very helpful as I assume you stay where you are because of it being home, Wales etc. That aside, wouldn't it be nicer for the family if you and DH could live together full time somewhere beginning with an O or even a C????

PP - are we going to see you before you go? Very excited for you, but sad to see you move on.

Sponge - how is it going?

Rolf & Sybil - you've given me the heebeegeebees about the worries of kids being in school. At the moment I have my head in the sand and I'm not listening.

Amber - come back!!! Seriously, I hope you are ok, and that you get a completion date v soon.

Viva & Puree - I thought that Steve was the rightful winner of Masterchef too.

We don't have slapping here, but pinching, and it hurts. What is more, P has started pinching me when I take something off him, or take him away from something. This is not good . It also makes me quite shouty as it hurts. Infact my neck now has scratch marks on it. P also throws EVERYTHING, which is also driving me a bit potty.

Essie, S is getting the farm for Christmas too. However I don't know how I feel about having a load of Tory farmers in the house - get plenty of those at work! . Maybe we'll need to buy him the post office too, complete with striking posties.

Oh, allnew S's Boden duffle came (ducks to avoid flying objects to all who missed their parcels yesterday) and miles too big. Gutted. 12-18 month out of stock for ages so no point ordering it. Think I might keep it though and hopefully it will do early Spring and maybe Autumn next year. Still need to find him something warm enough for now though and I've already been shopping like money's going out of fashion this week. My spending clearly wasn't added to the latest economy figures or the expected upturn definitely would have happened today.

LOL, probably is a Tory, Rolf! But I don't think I'd waste my money on the Post Office from Happyland, BDQ - apparently quite a lot of the figures are missing from the packs at the moment...

Spider LOL, ok, I'll move then - I'll start packing on Monday! Oh that it were that easy. But I do think seriously about moving - at the moment, there are no openings anywhere else in Wales (seriously). In future, there may be a place at one of the large institutions located on a river crossing of one kind or another; I really don't know what I'd do (this is assuming they're begging me to take their job ) because I am committed to Iestyn having a Welsh education, and that's only available this side of the border - or London, actually. The main problem is that I'm quite rooted here.
Academia is in a real mess at the moment (well, it always is). Departments are closing; Bangor made a statement last year that it was going to put a freeze on staff recruitment (); nowhere else is recruiting. (At least I have a job; a senior friend and colleague is about to become unemployed. Her husband also left her for his secretary, and their house was sold during the divorce, so she has nothing, no roots.) We could all go on strike, but then that would save the universities a load of money. Plus it didn't work the last time.

Oops, ranting. I'll stop. But there's a brand new blog on the topic the insecure scholar; the irony is Sue (my colleague) and I thought it was mild compared to some stuff we've been through/seen!