June 2005 babies

[uwila]

Hi everyone. Thought it was time we have a post-natal thread.

News today from Charley, that Arlo may be allowed home tomorrow and she will be posting herself very soon

Afternoon all,

Hurrah - have finally managed to read the thread and try and catch up

Had such a busy period recently what with the usual trying to cope with two kids by yourself once dh goes back to work, and then poor dh's aunt finally succumed to bowel cancer, we all knew the end was close, so we had alot of visits backwards and forwards in the last 10 days or so. Funeral was last friday, and it was lovely, and I think it's a bit of a relief to all concerned now that she's not suffering any more

Welshie/Franni - we have a colicky one here too. DS had very bad colic and we eventually discovered he was lactose sensitive until his digestive system matured abit more, we used colief drops and they were fab. Have found with dd though that if she has very frequent feeds (every 2 hrs or less) she's worse. Yesterday managed to get her to go at least 3, and mostly 4 hours between feeds and there was literally less than 5 mins of crying/pulling legs up/arching back, so am hoping this is abit of a breakthough...

Apart from the colic dd is wonderful, am definitely enjoying this new baby phase more than with ds...but I'm sure that's because I'm more relaxed...with ds the first few months passed in a daze from lack of sleep, and because dh and I were so worried about everything he did or everything we did !

Anyone else bottle feeding?? I stopped b/f when dd was @ 6 days, and thought my milk had gone (she's now 27 days) as I had nothing for about a week, but in the last few days it appears to be back...am only concerned cos dh and I you know whatted the other night and since then the milk is back and now I'm worried my perfect family of 2 will become 3 !!! I'm being silly aren't I??? I just can't remember if this happened with ds...best get to the doctors today me thinks >

Oh forgot - think a 'southies' meetup would be great too just have to wait until afew more cross to the other side! Do you have a date in mind Uwila??

Right. So with the first baby we are happy if we are just all alive by the end of the day (or by the following morning...). With the second then, is time to fix all the mistakes, right?!
That's what I have been thinking, since I am now a relaxed and experienced mum [smug emoticon].
So... no more rocking and patting to sleep - check!
During the day all curtains open and lots of noise. - check!
At night, no lights and no talking - check!
Put the baby still awake in the crib to sleep - Erm.... How does anyone do that?! Does anyone manage to prevent their babies to fall asleep at the breast?? I prod and poke DS, and he just keep on snoring.... Or if he is actually awake or not sleeping he just cry his head off!
Don't let baby fall asleep in the breast - erm... see above!
Keep them on a schedule from the begining - HOW?!!?! Let them cry until is time to feed? Wake them up when is time to eat? Anyone had any success that way???
Ok, I give up! Will just be a bad mummy, feed on demand, co-sleep and pay for it the next 18 years! Anyone else???
rant over! I clearly have been able too much if I can actually think about all these things!

Good to hear from you Tea. Sorry to hear about your DH's aunt . I hear milk can keep coming for a long time after stop bfing.... I also know of people spraying DPs when , hum, "excited".... So maybe was a combinations of the two! Don't think milk would come back immediatly! BTW you never disapoint us with your "energy".... How many stitches you had again?

So, shall we settle for the 11th? So far we have me, Mr.W, and Jonah. Katz, are you still in?
Next decision is where.... Nice restaurant close to the station?

Don't mention schedules and routines Lua, I get stressed out by my failure on that front! I'm still doing the same as you, co-sleeping and feeding on demand but definitely don't want to be doing this forever...I need my evenings back! I asked my health visitor about this today and she just said to start a routine when I feel ready...well I'm ready now but DS2 isn't. What did you do with your DD? From what I can remember with DS1, it was about 3 months before his routine started to develop (we tried a bed time routine from 6 weeks but it took another 6 weeks for it to work!).

Noggermum, any tips to pass on? You seem to have things pretty much sorted? Uwila, are you doing Gina Ford?

Bubb, is it your birthday today? If so happy birthday If not today, it sounds like it's soon?

Sorry to hear about your DH's aunt Teabelly. Sounds like you've had a lot to cope with on top of having a new baby.

Great news about Arlo!

Jonah, hope everything is going ok on your first day with just you and Isaac.

DS2 is asleep so I'm going to watch some tennis and try and finish reading Sunday's newspaper.

count me in for the 11th unless DD1 comes down with chicken pox. we are currently on tender hooks just waiting. the little girl who we share a car to baby group with on thursday came out all spotty on friday, DD1 should be okay but it can be very serious in newborns.

Lua and Mrs W I'm right with you on the routines front. It's so bloody hard to start it off because you're so knackered and they seem so small. With dd it was easier as we'd been seperated from her a bit by the neo natal experience and then we had a maternity nurse when she was 5 weeks old who helped us put her in a routine but ds just does what he likes - feeds, sleeps etc whenever and wherever he feels like. Part of me thinks this is pretty cool and the way it should be but a bigger bit is now getting worried that I'm storing up all kind of problems for the future.....makes my head hurt just to think about it...and as for letting him cry just couldn't do it atm.
Tea - sorry about your dh's aunt.
I am full of admiration for you on your 'activities' - should have been a category in the sweep.
Thanks for keeping us up to date with Charley and Arlo Lippy.
Lots of the love to the Charley family.

tribpot - sorry the feeding isn't going well. All is ok here but I must confess it is such a worry as DS was so little I am really concerned about him feeing well. I don't know what I'd do if he wasn't feeding well so you have thoughts right now. I religiously write down feeding times and don't like it when he feeds for under 10 minutes. This feeding business is stressful even when its ok let alone when its not.

Ds is so small I put a newborn outfit on him yesterday and it just swamps him. He is premature sized I am sure its because I'm such a poor eater, He is gaining weight well but he is just so small. Overdue and still 6 pounds 6. He seems really happy and is so gorgeous but it is a worry. We still get leaks in huggies nappies because he is so small.

Anyway I better go he has just woken up. Hope Charley and Arlo are home tomorrow.

Welshie, he he he re the new sweepstake category Lua - no stitches this time woohoo, hence the 'activities' - don't think we managed it until ds was at least 10 weeks last time, mind you I had a whole cotton reel's worth of stitches first time round

Thanks for all the kind words for dh's Aunt.

Routines - don't ya just love them . We tried Gina at 2 weeks and dd went into it for 2 1/2 days...but then it all fell apart, but we've just decided to give it up until nearer 6 weeks...I think it's not worth getting stressed about, do what's right for you and your family. Very young babies need alot of feeding so it's a while before they can fall into any kind of routine. Lua I think that's why I'm enjoying dd more than ds... we've decided not to stress about routines and so far it's working...re having the evening's back we've just started this week to put dd up into our room after her 6/7ish o'clock feed and then all feeds after then are upstairs until 6/7ish in the morning. We've been trying to keep her awake for a while in the day, singing to her and 1/2 hour bouts on the play gym, baths etc to make her want to sleep at night...so far so good, but I've probably jinxed it now

Routines... this is dh's and my biggest parenting disagreement (so far... ). He's all for them asap, I'm not (yet!) as I feel ds is too little. Am also co-sleeping and feeding on demand, which means very extended feeding sessions in the afternoons and early evenings, but am managing OK, possibly because I've just the one and dh is at home with me. ds is already going for 4-5 hours at nights, so I'm only really getting up once with him.
Question (tmi alert): my lochia have been yellow for days and days, now I've suddenly started bleeding again - is it possible that I could have my periods back already, 6 weeks post partum, while bf?!? I've nothing to worry about as haven't been doing any 'activities' (Tea, I too am impressed), and I know bf isn't exactly a recommended form of contraception anyway, but was rather looking forward to no periods for a bit...

doooooh berolina, if I have got my period I've nothing to worry about anyway...
Shall I reconsider that bit about managing OK?!

Everyone would have gone for Teabelly in that catergory

Pink, we always have leaks with huggies nappies, with DS1 and DS2, so it may not be to do with size, just his shape. Are you managing to eat enough now? Do you find breastfeeding is making you more hungry? I am constantly famished at the moment, and have taken to hiding food around the house so that DS1 and DH don't nick it off me

Teabelly, useful ideas about starting the routine, thank you. Six weeks is the deadline in my mind to start it too. Is your DD actually sleeping when you put her upstairs then? DS is mainly awake in the evenings.

Hi everyone,
Lua, lol at your routine rant, think it's early days for us yet, but the intention is there, but can see if going out the window already and we haven't even started! Am so grateful that dh works from home at the moment, as never really grasped the enormity of looking after new born and toddler!
Kat a friend of mines ds was exposed to chicken pox and the mw advised that it would be unusal for a new born to catch it as they should be immune from the mother. Lets hope so.
Tea, interesting about your dd is not so windy if she stretches longer between feeds. I had it in the back of my mind that I read somewhere that they try and feed more if they are windy as they mistake the pain for hunger and then it makes it worse. The problem at the moment is that as soon as dd kicks off, ds kicks off too, which is not great in the middle of the night, so it's a question of latch her on asap. She's not quite got the hang of day and night yet, does anyone know when that clicks in?
Trib, sorry to hear about the bf, but it sounds like you're hanging on in there, good for you. Good luck with it.
Bubb, am so pleased that little Oscar is on the mend. Lol at the pram thing. I remember borrowing one with ds and the chasy kept collapsing as you walked along, so you'd end up walking on your knees! Felt such a fool when you couldn't get it back up, infront of everyone!
Well things are hectic here, ds is very non plussed with his sister, and am having to keep an eagle eye on him. I feel sorry for him as it seems like, no this no that. It's difficult to get the balance right, not to let him get away with murder, but to make sure he knows he's still loved to bits. That's parenting for you I guess.
Must go and try and get some sleep before madam wakes up. She's not so keen on sleeping in her moses basket at night, and has been sleeping on me or dh. My back is killing me from bf in bed and trying to sleep at the same time!
Hope everyone has a good night. XX

Hi everyone

Still preggers Going for a S&S today, which I hope will get things moving, I'm also feeling terribly crampy. This time next week, I will be a mum again I reckonn ( was going to type "by hook or by crook" but I hope it doesn't come down to either of those 2 methods )

I'm not sure I'll be able to make a Southy meet I think I'll just be too busy trying to get baby's passport in record time before our holiday and stuff. But, we'll see what happens.

Lots of love to you all xx

PS. No news from Charley today, but she may be home soon!

Routines - I was thinking about 6 weeks too - but it does depend on ds becoming a little more dependable at sleeping in the evenings. Yesterday he fed on and off from about 5pm, obviously ate far too much then at 7.30pm he vomited up the whole lot on me, gave me a beautiful smile and slept until 10pm - my response was 'well it's a start...'
I'm drinking fennel tea and giving him gripe water and infacol at alternate feeds to try to calm his wind. I think it might be working a bit. But let's be honest - who the hell knows what works with babies. I remember reading that 'There's no solution to babies' - and I suppose I spent the first few months of dd's life looking for the solution. I'm happier this time around because I have just gone with the flow - so far.....
Bero - with the lochia I had none for a few days and then a bit more bleeding I think that's pretty common - it can come back for a bit as you increase your activity.
Pink - I know worrying is an essential part of motherhood but if Osiris is eating, happy and putting on weight you're doing a great job.

Morning all. One hand typing again?.

Bubb, glad you?ve sorted out the feeding issue.

Lua, let me have a think about venues.

Tea, sorry to hear about your aunt. I have nothing but admiration for you you-know-whatting so soon!!! Best of luck at the doctors?

Thanks for all your words of encouragement about my hormones and sicky babies. Glad it isn?t just me. Luckily, Isaac has been really good for the past couple of days and is eating and sleeping well, although he has taken to doing some impressive vomiting. Re routines, I was going to attempt Gina soon. At the moment, Isaac seems to be following a 3 hour cycle day and night, which I can live with and is a vast improvement on a 1 ½ hour cycle.

Off to sainsbury?s now. Catch up later?.

What is this routine business all about I have never had a routine my whole life and all of a sudden I think it might be a key part of delevopmental progress. Perhaps I should read about it. Is it that important? I mean he is awake in the day time mainly over and above that is it crucial? I thought keeping them alive was the big thing Perhaps I am a bit laid back - well I'm off to read him wild west witches

Pink - second to keeping them alive I think keeping yourself sane is the next big thing. Hence routines and the thought that they might help them sleep for longer at the 'right' time of day/night. However I was a slave to a routine the first time around and judged the whole success of my day by whether I'd kept dd in her routine. I really,really,really want to be more laid back this time around. I don't know if it's possible but I'd like ds to find his own way - as long as it roughly corresponds with mine I might just try for a sensible going to bed time etc. This may be entirely impossible, I really don't know - anyone got any thoughts??

I second all of you second timers thoughts that "going with flow" this time around is making me so much more in love with DS! So why do I keep bringing this routine stuff up?! Well, because I have a feeling that if he doesn't get longer sleeps, our honeymoon might be over soon.
He takes one good sleep (~3h) a day btwn 9 -11, which is a good start... but the rest of the time he wakes up every hour or so! He is generally an easy going guy, and he is always happy to be in the boob...But I think I eventually want to get something done during the day.....
Sure he will sleep if I carry him, but that is where the demons of "good sleep habits" come in.... There are lots of theories that say the earlier you establish them the better. But how early is too early, and how to do it? letting him cry this young seems cruel... carrying and giving him a dummy are supposed to be "bad habits"....So what's left?

MrW. you asked me how I did it with DD. Well, she was a terrible eater, and didn't settle well. But once she was sleeping she would always go for 3-4 hours... so this is new territory for me...

Uwila, you strike me as a tough mum how are you doing??

Every time I log on I can't quite keep up with the number of messages!!!

Mrs W - no tips, I am blessed with good nighttime sleepers! Believe you me though , it is not all easy, my lovely daughter is a right bugger to get to sleep in the day. Left to her own devices she would stay awake from 7am - 6.30pm (enforced bedtime by me so i get an hour with her older sis) and would get increasingly more overwhelmed, overtired and overwraught - meaning screaming non stop for several hours. it takes me AGES to convince her to go down for a day time nap, involving large amounts of cuddling (so as to avoid constantly feeding her to sleep or the dummy), so of course she now thinks she was put in this earth to be carried all the time. the only reason she sleeps so well at night is that she is absolutely knackered by then!!! DD1 was the same to about 6-7 weeks when suddenly it all came together but non of my tried and teasted methods seem to work for this one. Any tips for getting them to nap in the day gratefully received!

Afternoon ladies!

Hope we're all doing well. I am a bit behind on all this talk of routine as I think at 9 days ds might be a little young for that Having said that, he does sleep wonderfully at the moment, touch wood, and we only get up to him once in the night.

The MIL seems to have backed off the moral highground for a while, having admitted she only breastfed dh's bro for 2 weeks (and dh not at all). I only have to feed Toby EBM for three weeks to have won the competition So far that's still going well and I'm hoping we might get up to a half-and-half mix of EBM and formula (noting what you say about not mixing them in the same feed, bero).

The latest in dh's family saga now is that the FIL is upset we haven't been in contact since the baby was born. Because obviously we would have nothing better to do. They are unbelievable.

MrsW, so far dh is doing really well. He's grown hugely in confidence in the last week and keeping me sane when my hormones go completely haywire, as they seem to every morning at the moment

Tea - hats off to you even though I have to agree with the others, we would all have chosen you in a sweepstake And sorry to hear about your dh's aunt.

Lippy - best of luck to you!

Oh, I forgot a funny story my dad told me this morning to cheer me up about the bf. My uncle asked my grandma once what she would do differently if she was bringing up her three children again. The only thing she could come up with at the time was "give them more cheese".

Quick question everyone - what did you dress your newborns in when you gave birth? Sleepsuits?? Or were they too hot in them?? Just a vest??? Never had a summer baby before!!!!

Tessie, I just put ds in a vest, with a cotton cellular blanket over. But I co-slept with him in the hospital and dh does now, so am v conscious of not over-dressing him. It was flipping boiling in the maternity ward though so I'm sure a vest would be fine even if your baby sleeps in his/her crib.