April 2009 - Chapter 3 - Let us round up the stragglers

[PuzzleRocks]

Ta da.

Springy our bodies have been through a complete trauma. Our hormones are all over the place and all of a sudden we are mothers with tiny babies to look after. Although I feel that I am failing in some ways I don't think that pnd in itself is failure and neither should you.

Who have you talked to in real life? My mother happened to be around when I was having a bad day and actually she was far more understanding than I would have imagined.

FWIW I now score 16 on the edinburgh thingy and I was thinking that I am better this week

Hugs Springy. I keep starting and stopping the message I want to write in response to you. You're not a failure. You're are coping as going to GP with your concerns shows. 'And being unhappy with things is a real problem' (I'm quoting Dh there; he is always telling me I should recognise this myself). Sometimes one needs a little help doing so, and meds can be that little bit extra which sets you back on the track you want to be on. There's nothing wrong with it, there is no failure in it. Help in it's many forms is what we all need sometimes.

And don't worry about catching up. Just come hang out with us for a while! We love you!

Hugs.

Springy - so sorry that you're feeling like this as Bleu says, you are in no way a failure - in fact you are pretty much as far from being a failure as you can get. You have recognised that things aren't right and you are taking steps to get it sorted - those are the actions of a strong woman and a fantastic mummy x x x

I just have to say GRRRRRRRR . DH is constantly banging around the house, slamming drawers and doors and waking Oscar up. He is so bloody thoughtless it drives me up the wall. He gets WAY more sleep than I do (I'm bf so all the night feeds are mine) and he can sleep through all O's grunting and beetling where I can't and he STILL has the audacity to complain about being tired. All I can think about is sleep. I dream of it, I yearn for it, I want it almost more than anything in the whole wide world. For DH to jeapordize the little sleep I can get by being thoughtless, banging around and generally winding me up (he can be a patronizing stubborn arse at times - actually, a lot of the time - and usually he upsets me/starts an argument just before I'm about to go to sleep - hence no bloody sleep for me) really really really pisses me off. Rah.

Sorry. Rant over. Just read it back and it makes no bloody sense but it made me feel a bit better.

Springy and nutts - have emailed and posted on threads - I can't even believe it Nutts and Springy sending you the biggest load of hugs possible!

Wow what a day -

So so sorry to everyone that is having a bad time and sorry for the me post that's about to come...

So Karahan stopped breathing today and I swear I have never been so scared

He was asleep and I was changing his bum as I do maybe five times a day during his sleep at the moment (with the heat and upset tummy he needs very regular changes) so nothing out of the ordinary when all of a sudden he literally jumps out of his skin, screams out loud and then held his breath in fear but did it for too long and properly stopped breathing, went purple then white. It lasted about 30 seconds then my mum got him crying again.

The thing I am most ashamed of is that I was useless , truly useless! I was just screaming at him to breathe and not doing anything, it's only after 10-15 seconds or so that I called for help and they managed to get him started again - I know I am not but I feel like an awful mother - I didn't do anything! I can't believe it - I genuinely don't know what would have happened if I was by myself

He is fine, full of it this evening, giggling and smiling at everyone but I can't shake it off! And I can't sleep as I am so scared it will happen again - he has been having lots of night tremors at the moment which is obviously where the fear comes from so I am worried it will happen again!

Sorry again for the me post x hope everyone is ok!

Oh BB, how awful for you, little monkey. Have you any idea why?
I'm glad he is in fine form again. Don't beat yourself up, you will know what to do if it happens again. Which I hope it wont but ykwim.

Thanks Puzzle

No, we think he just got really scared from his nightmare and didn't know what to do with himself so held his breath - he does it when he has tantrums sometimes but always gives in and cries when he is not getting his own way - and this time he just held it for too long iykwim! But we don't really know will just keep an eye on him and see how it goes!

HOws things with you this evening - seems like it's been a pretty rubbish day for everyone - hope all is good with you!

Good God BB I can so understand your distress. Hugs. My sister used to do things like that too. My mom would occasionally pinch her in the fleshy bit between the thumb and pointer finger (supposedly an acupuncture point). The shock of it would often make her take a breath. And Puzzle's right, the next time (if there's a next time) you'll be right in there; it was just the shock froze you for a second, but then you went into action and called for help which is really good. And your reaction now, worrying and going over it in your mind again is preparing you once more for what you will do if it ever, God forbid, happens again.
Hugs BB

Morning Ladies!
Having so much trouble sleeping lately. I think I'm ovulating which would explain some of it...plus putting Meg to bed early (9.15) last night did me no favors as she was up at 4.30 for a feed, but I went to bed an hour after her and am up now (still)...so not enough sleep to make me sane.
Ah well, hope everyone else stays tucked up n bed late.

I have already changed 3 nappies this morning.

I was up every 1.5 hours during the night to feed or change Hazel.

I have cried down the phone to DH.

There are no words for how fed up I am with this diarrhoea.

Frekkles, like you I think the jabs have broken my baby.

Oh Schulte! Hugs. It could very well be she's got something because of a lowered immune system because of the jabs.
How long has it been now?
Have you tried encouraging her to feed a little longer in hopes that she'll last longer?
I would say perhaps another visit to the GP/HV is in order. Perhaps they have some other ideas on what you can do.

Meg took 5 or 6 days to start acting normal again after her jabs and then it was easily 10 or 12 days before her poos started to be more normal... she still has a few which are particularly runny and awful, but surely it can't still be because of the jabs...

Im really not liking the sound of all this! Violet goes for her third lot of jabs today which means she has to have all three at once so although she hasnt really had much of a reaction before Im guessing that it may happen this time and having just had Oscar with the squits yesterday I dont really want Violet with them now!

BB - Really goo thanks. I'm managing to do my Nell dvd as Ellen does it with me and her dancing about keeps Holly amused. Result!

Bleu - Yes, my BIL taught me to massage that bit of my hand when I have a headache and it does seem to help.

BB I know the panic you must have felt, dd1 did something similar a couple of times when tiny, and as you know h had to go under the resuscitation unit at 2 days old. I too didn't dare leave them alone afterwards, but you will relax after a while, because it's unlikely it will happen again.

FWIW, DD1 stops breathing when she has a febrile convulsion and the doc has explained to me that they've got a reflex to start breathing again when they need the oxygen. I still panic of course and wouldn't hesitate to call 999 any time.

Hope you're feeling okay today. x

Bleu - did Meg also poo after every feed, and in between? That's what H does at the mo. Will call HV...

she did poo/wee after every feed... and then had major wees in between...I don't remember there being poos in between feeds too, though there may have been.

H can do up to 3 poos in a row after a feed at the moment. Sorry if TMI but they come out extremely liquid, and sometimes foamy. Colour and smell is normal. Now IS this something to worry about or not? Normally she goes once every 3 days.

Springy smooches but only in a platonic way - don't sue! Nobody is going to invalidate your feelings by calling you daft for pnd. I will say try not to beat yourself up about it as you have no control over it. Eventually you will start to come out of it, just take the time you need to do that!

HaveHadDepressionIt'sNotFunTiggaxx

Who is SR please?

schulte is she feeding more than usual?

PooTiggaxx

Dawn she is now, but I am offering her the boob all the time as well.

Thread here

schulte if you are worried take her to the dr's but it sounds like a mixture of warm weather and feeding more we went through this a couple of weeks ago.

JustTiggaxx

once every 3 days? well for Meg that would be highly abnormal...
Meg poo'd after (or during) every feed and since she was feeding every 2/2.5 hrs instead of 3/3.5 hrs and when I think about it (after talking with dh) I remember laughing about the fact that I changed a diaper and then she poo'd in it right away again. Or I would change a very pooey diaper feed her then she'd poo and I'd change her and then she'd wake herself up to poo in about 15min...
as for the foamy bit Meg had that too after her first jabs... Not this time though.