Jan 09 - weaning,smiling,laughing and chatting and loads more fun to come:)

[stripeywoollenhat]

there.

Hi folks - I cant stop and post as have visitors tomorow and my house is 1) 3 floors, 4 beds and a decent size 2) a complete shit tip with different yak odd smells on each floor. So 6 hours cleaning coming my way.
We bought it as a do-er upper. Gawwwd help us. Takes 45 mins to hoover the bugger [and thats with no carpet in half the hall/stairs], Hatts is screaming and I have to leave for dd1 at 3pm.

/up late cleaning me thinks! We were going to have an upstairs shower room done with remaining redundancy cash, but glad didn't now - less toilets to clean the better!

Yesterday great. Really good. Will post a proper post tonight and start an eggy thread too.

x to all

tree Glad yesterday went well, will check out your eggy thread.

Miss J at Hay festival, would love to be there. haven't been for a few years now, but always had a drunken very interesting and informative time. Saw Alambama 3 there once, which was amazing..

DD crying again (still ill and in awful awful mood), will catch up properly later..

be in soon to catch up.

tree - good luck

OK - have got to page 15 - and am not going to remember all this much longer so will have to catch up in installments.

Spink - pleased you and DP had a nice dinner but at his comment - you've just had a baby! Go easy on yourself. Yoga sounds like a fab suggestion - might try that too. Also do you like swimming? That is good for toning too and not too strenuous. As for healthy eating - yep, I need to do that too. Am sugar detoxing again from tomorrow - lost half a stone in a few weeks last time I did it and was still eating well just no junk. Personal shopper sounds fab, hope it went well - will prob find out when get through next 5 pages

Dog - Yep, will join Pat in supporting you with any Science stuff. Do you have any A-levels? Are they science related?

Pat - Did I read you teach Physics? I am a Physics specialist - would be very nice to come across another woman teaching it

B/f and covering up - God I wish I had the confidence just to go for it a bit more. Actually the only time I cover up with a blanket or anything is if DS is really fussy or if in front of male friends and family. Don't mind strangers

OMG Pat!! Are you in the Cotswolds? Where do you teach? I went to school in Bourton on the Water and Burford!! I grew up around there.

Nappies MissJ - yay!! You've got the bug! And fab news about your course, am really pleased you went for it.

Dog - hope your babies are feeling better, and you too. I count you lot among my friends now you know so you certainly have friends.

Right.... will read more...

Oooh - I love Monsoon - my brother used to work there and I stole borrowed his 75% discount card. I mourned the day he left that job.

And John Lewis... I miss shopping.

Bravissimo fab for clothes - off to order a new swimsuit from there later as I was getting a few looks at Center Parcs with GG norks hanging out of my C/D cup one.

OK - am up to start of page 19 and DD trying to turn off laptop, better stop neglecting children and bath them instead. Back later

Hey! MissJ! I put exclamation marks everywhere - but strangely only on mumsnet!!!!!!

Books glad the red clover is working for you. Great that the potty training is going so well. Its so nice when it seems to click and they are more dry than wet iyswim.

EPPM and MissJ my two boys were never rough with each other when they were little, in fact they only started fighting once they were both in school full time - they learn such a lot of bad habits from the other kids in school. Am a bit actually as ds2 has announced today that he isn't going to have pink as his favourite colour anymore because the other boys teased him about it.

Tree glad yesterday went well, am looking forward to hearing all about it.

Lenni good to have you back.

Well my day took a nosedive, dd filled her nappy just as I was going out the front door, had to run for the bus, didn't have my fare ready so bus driver had to wait for me then there was some granny with an empty buggy up in the buggy bay so I struggled to get my buggy in and dropped my bag which spilled its contents onto the floor just as the bus went round the corner! I was so embarrassed the bus was nearly full and they were all watching me. When I did manage to sit down the woman next to me said 'first time mum?' and then looked horrified when I said that I had 2 boys as well.

I was so wound up when I got into town I went straight to John Lewis for a coffee and carrot cake (for my nerves you understand) I was actually shaking . I couldn't get in the mood for shopping but got it into my head that if I had a decent change bag I could decant everything into it and fold the buggy for the journey home so ended up spending £53 on a skip hop that I don't even like that much. It does fit on the buggy though. Bought dd some shorts in John Lewis and the boys some shampoo and crazy bones then caught the bus home again - another nightmare as there was a teenager and 2 grannies sat in the buggy bay, despite the bus being half empty and they refused to move so I had to try and squish the buggy in and stand all the way home!

When I did get home DH was there to let the dogs out, but he had brought a colleague with him (the one we are due to go out with in a couple of weeks - young, designery, kidless etc etc). The house was an absolute tip top to bottom, I had been out all but half an hour all day so hadn't even done the breakfast dishes and hadn't vacummed either which is a big no no when you have 3 dogs. He had also taken him through thr house into the garden, which is a total mess with piles of things waiting to go to the tip.

The finally, went to pick up the boys from school only to be greeted by another Mum whose little one had made up his mind he was coming to our house for tea (he's ds2s best friend). My boys both know I don't have their school friends around because I am too ashamed of the house so he hadn't actually been invited, he'd just got it into his head somehow and started to cry when his mum said he wasn't coming. So his mum says 'o dear, what can we do about this?' and with the house the way it is, I couldn't even invite her in for a coffee so that he could have a quick play with the boys. It was so embarrassing, she was obviously expecting me to invite them in and I couldn't. I felt like such a horrible person - god what must she think of me.

I feel awful that my poor boys miss out on playdates because I can't bring myself to have their friends round to the house - I am a horrible mummy. Problem is, I grew up in this house and was bullied because it was a messy and scruffy and I don't want them to go through what I did. It is obviously a lot better now, but is still a fixer upper as Dad did nothing more in 30 years than woodchip everywhere and paint everything magnolia, then it was rented out for years so you can imagine what it was like when we moved in. We live in a very affluent area with lots of very posh, big and new houses which is where the majority of the boys friends live, so I know their friends would be shocked if they came to our house.

Am feeling really low now, have asked DH to bring chips home as I feel to tired and depressed to cook.

Sorry, just looked at my post - tis enormoose!

Oh Moose! for your day.

I share your messy house issues. I need at least 48 hrs notice before I will let anyone in our door. No one can sit down otherwise, as all surfaces and seats covered in landry, books, random toys....And outside house yard thing is frankly dangerous.

for you. Enjoy your chips [yum] I'll be back soon. Bigg hiss to public transport too.

Serves me right for not retaking my driving test. Thanks Tree

On reflection, my house is not a decent size [a term my nan uses, to mean big enough for it's purpose] it is too small and too tall. We need a garage and less steps. 34 of the buggers to hoover and still not enough places for clothes. Sigh.

Moose - Other mum will also live in bombsite family friendly home and so will understand. Hardly anyone is ready fro visitors with no warning. If you are worried next week maybe suggest a playgym meetup of somthing?

If I went to a messy house I wouldn't care would you? If I went to a shiny clean house I'd be worried as dd would no doubt squash cake into something. If I went to a house that was a happy medium I'd love it and wonder what the secret of it is. Am still about mine though.

Oh for a cleaner. And a tidier upper.

Aaaarrrgghhh! I must be cursed! Damn dogs just had diarrhoea all over the kitchen floor - again! Why me?!

She was hiding in the laundry when I went in. Poor thing, I freaked out last time this happened and she must remember. Amazingly I managed to hold it together, talk to her softly and clean it all up and bleach the whole floor without having a breakdown, despite both boys needing the toilet and having to come through the kitchen to get there during the cleaning up process. Think I'm past the breakdown stage tbh.

Tree Moose Dog May I join you in the 'my house is a dump' stakes. It needs sooo much work doing to it, its a knackered old victorian terrace, with crayon all over the walls, damp, piles of clothes waiting to be put away everywhere, general dust and cobwebs and a carpet the colour of mud (it's meant to be beige). have given up caring what other people think, just tend to think of it as 'homely'.

DD is doing my head in. All week she has been impossible. had put it down to her being off colour, but today she has jsut gone from tantrum to tantrum. She works herself up into such a state, she clenches her fists and they shake with anger . Tried to take her to the local shop to get some bread and she had a meltdownon the way... I swear I used to look at mothers with a screaming child and think, 'Hmm, my child will never behave like that.' I have no idea what to do, we are consistent, set clear boundries, she's not spoilt, we do lots of positive parenting and tactical ignoring (have thumbed my way thorugh quite a few toddler books) and am stuck. She causes so much tension, I am so by her behaviour sometimes in public. When she is with her grandparents/Uncle/ Aunty she is as good as gold. With me and DP she is a nightmare. I'm really close to losing it with her and giving her a smack, which makes me feel like I am doing such a crap job and really guilty. I'm just knackered and out of patience. I never behaved like this as a child, so can't really get my head around where its coming from. Can I send her to toddler boot camp?
Sorry for long and completely me me me post. Just getting it out of my system.

HKZ - are you living in my house in some alternate reality?

Ah no - you have carpet. dd has carpet but we are all about floorboards here.

Am sure many share your toddler hell. I hear it's all about consistency. Try everything, pick one, stick with that.

Maybe it's just who she is right now, this is what she has to do, and it is no reflection on you at all in the slightest. It just is, and it will go away.

Soon I hope. Vent here till it does. Others will have sensible ideas for you I'm sure.

Have started eggy thread in conception

moose, sending you a HUGE hug for a hard day.. I think you are really thoughtful for your dc's, if the other mum thinks badly of you she isn't worth worrying about. Bet she doesn't though, it just isn't possible to do all the childcare and keep a ready-for-guests house at all times!

tree ooh excited to hear about yesterday - have you started your other thread? Will you link to it? And how are all those floors going? We have only one floor but all of it is covered with things that should be somewhere else...

lenni thanks - if you have any sugar detox tips I'd appreciate them, I am eating so much sweet stuff so feel a bit at the idea of coping without it.
The personal shopper went really well! It was a bit weird to start withand took a little time for me to relax, and for her to work out what my style (hah) is. But I have some good things that I can wear every day, and actually like enough that I'll try hard to avoid getting posset on them . Also feeling quite excited now about getting a few other bits and pieces on my own, whereas before walking into a shop felt overwhelming and confusing..
Having said that, it wasn't all WOOHOO - she suggested wearing leggings / skinny jeans and long tops so the baby belly is hidden, which is a bit maternity-wear, but, fine, it is good to have a reality check that however lovely the clothes, clingy slimline tops just aren't going to be my thing for a bit!
Also it was a bit ambitious getting a capsule wardrobe for £200 - we went a little over budget and still ran out of time and didn't get all the things on her list (still need to get a jacket, some gladiator sandals and a pair of kick flare jeans) (when I win the lottery).
Anyway. I recommend her, had a laugh and have some good clothes I've already had lots of compliments on. here's her website if anyone is interested!!

just x posted with hkz & tree - am off to see your thread now!
hkz - it is not necessarily the case that you are doing anything wrong - just keep to the good stuff that you're already doing - this is just something that toddlers HAVE to do, to a greater or lesser extent, it is a really important developmental phase. She will not be like this forever!! it might well be that she is just a determined character (a great trait to have as an adult!) and so is pushing against your boundaries more. Instead of thinking about what you should be doing differently, try to find ways of zoning out / winding down from her behaviour. Sorry if I've been preaching... don't mean to, hope it helps at least a leetle

Oooh, Tree - can you link to it? I've been waiting all day to hear all about it.

HKZ - Am 100% with you on the toddler thing. It is so hard to maintain control sometimes. I'm trying not to take her tantrums as a reflection on my parenting but when she's screaming in public I just want the ground to swallow me up. DH and I end up scrapping as we get so stressed by it. DD also behaves for family but I think that is a case of being more 'comfortable' for want of a better term around us.

Dog - BTEC should get you onto an access course or A-Levels. Depends which route you want to go. Do you know where your nearest midwifery course is offered? The tutors there will be able to help you with their entry requirements. You should be able to do basic Maths/English qualifications (if you don't have those already) locally (Surestart?) and then that with your BTEC would get you onto an access course. BTW - much admiration for Tescos with 3! I struggle with my 2 - online all the way now!

MissJ - Another here who would love to come on one of your DH's riding holidays sometime. Does he have a website? Once I am fitter and lighter I'd love to ride again. DD had her first pony ride at Center Parcs

Pat - we're doing Tweenies on Tuesday - wish me luck

Right... off to read Tree's thread and then will tell you my news... I'm getting there

link to my thread

Very happy that you got some wardrobe items Spink! I was hoovering looking on the monsoon and Laura Ashley website for something my boobs wouold fit in. Not hopefull.

Tut. Am getting a flowery LAura Ashley blouse here to sling over a vest and denim skirt in a boho-i-just-came-from-the-beach style. Surely fat arms and droopy norks will fit in if I don't button it up.

ooh that is pretty!
I was shocked at the difficulties nork-dressage involves, never really had norks of note before, but everything I had problems with, fit-wise, was because of norks being out of proportion and straining at the fabric...

And the buttons. Those dainty shell buttons for example, have noooooo chance.

Thinking this skirt here though my shotputters calves and cankles will take from the overall effext. Espacially in my skin tone, which is grey with a hint of blue.

you are TOO kind to yourself I will send my personal shopper (preen) over to give you a talking to if you're not careful. I like the skirt too, it's a great length and good tie detail too!

My dd asked me if I was allowed on a ride due to size!!

Am hoping it will still be long even on tall me. Hoping belt detail will cover 30 week bump.

Spink - sugar detox is murder for the first 2 days but after that gets loads and loads easier. Basically I cut out everything that contains refined sugar (cake, biscuits, chocolate, sweets, puddings, sweet drinks like squash etc. and also avoid fruit juice) and for the first couple of days I just eat whatever really, even if I end up eating more as long as it isn't sweet that's ok since you need to sort out your blood sugar before you can control your appetite. If you like natural yoghurt and cherry tomatoes then I use them for a sweet fix if I'm struggling. I also have a hot drink after a meal to break the sweet craving after my tea. I've got so much weight to lose (about 2.5-3 stone ) that I've realised I've got to break my eating habits and lack of exercise rather than any kind of diet being effective iyswim. The second stage is to swap not so good carbs for better carbs like brown rice for white etc. but I'm yet to get there.

Moose - nice to be back and sorry to hear about your day. Lovely to hear about DS though and pleased your little starlet behaved herself too.

Tree - will post on other thread. Have a million questions. You are very brave and very generous.

We had a fab time at center parcs, did loads and DD was fab. DS struggled with sleep but seems to have hit a better pattern the last 2 nights. All those with unsettled babies (Stripey?) I'm with you on the 4-5 months grumping phase. Am praying that DS is reaching the end of it.

Also he rolled! Went front to back on Sunday (which I missed) and back to front on Monday as if to say "There you go Mummy"

DD's party was good too - she is still talking about her friends coming to play. Right, best go find a swimsuit....