September 08 - New Year PFBs, Last Year BFPs!

[ninja]

Hi - welcome to the new thread!

Ooh, and does anyone find that their LO is developing a real personality? What i mean is, I know her well enough to know when it's a hungry cry or tired cry or wet cry etc etc but she's now started a new one in daytime - and all we can think is it's "i'm pissed off" cry eg I've had enough of lying in my pram, I want you to carry me on your shoulder so I can look at the world. Or, I've finished with this toy - entertain me, damn you!

She's really not done this before, so all I can think is she's becoming more self aware. Any thoughts?

Looking forward to it lolly et al.

Sunshine you poor thing, feel so sorry for you. In the short term, have you tried getting hold of a 20ml medicine syringe? You might be able to syringe some in for the short term, while you try to figure out how to get her to take a bottle again. Also, if you manage to get a bit in her, it might take the edge off the hunger and she'll be more prepared to take a bottle? Have you tried giving her a bottle while she's still pretty much asleep/going to sleep? A friend of mine from baby group has to give all her baby's feeds while she is waking up from naps (some breast, some bottle), as the baby gets really frustrated and thrashes around - seems to wake very hungry or something.
Do you think the night waking is because she's struggling to get enough calories in during the day? Is all her breastmilk expressed, or do you still feed direct? I guess there's not much point tackling the night wakings until you are entirely confident she's getting a reasonable amount during the day.
Sorry not to be more help! You've probably thought of all of these things.

I am praying to the god of sleep that T will lie in till 7:30 tomorrow - want to go to a baby gym group at 9:15, and if he gets up at his usual 7am he'll be fast asleep in his pram before we get there!

imoscarsmum definitely. It's especially noticable as she's so different from DS. She's a bit of a drama queen, much moe clingy but also seems to be more interested in the world around her. She's really smiley and will flirt with anyone. She also loves certain things above others.

sunshine I take it you've tried different types of day and different people feeding. I got my DD1 to take a bottle when I dropped her off with a friend after I'd taken her swimming (guaranteed to make her hungry). Tbh she usually chose NOT to take one (and I went back to work at 6 months), but I knew she COULD.

Haven't been on the computer for a bit, I've only managed to read through the last couple of days.

Sorry you're having problems Eandz and Sunshinemummy. I'm impressed with the weight loss Eandz, very jealous about the housekeeper though.

C also a bit of a night waker - she usually goes to bed when dd1 does, at 7-7.30ish, and wakes usually about 3 times before getting up at 7am. She doesn't ever seem wildly hungry, but does seem quite windy, jerking her legs about and grunting. The only time she burps easily is when she's had a really big feed, then it's a vast belch. I'm getting used to a permanent state of tiredness, I usually get woken before 7am by dd1, in 4 months, I've only had 1 break from dd2, of 1.5hours, and that was when I was ill. I think the latest I've got up in the last 3 years is about 8am, my biggest dream luxury is a long lie in.

P still an idiot, sorry to hear about yours Meglet, sounds like you're happier without him. P has been out the last couple of nights, he never even thinks he has to discuss it - just tells me (if I'm lucky) his pans. But he's always too tired to get up in the morning, strangely never too tired to go out at night.

He was good at the weekend though, it was dd1s 3rd birthday and he actually took an active role in family life for once. But it drives me mad that he rarely rises before 9, and sometimes as late as 12. Sorry, rant over [bluch]

splishsplosh you make me feel guilty for the whinge I'm about to have, as you're coping with 2 better than I'm coping with 1!
T has been up twice a night after his 10:30pm feed for the last 2 nights again . I've just worked out he's not feeding any less frequently after 7pm than he does after 7am, iykwim. I know plenty of people cope with far more night wakings than I do, and I don't have it too hard, but I still hate it when we have multiple night wakings. If I get a reasonable night's sleep I love being at home with T, love going to activities and generally love being a mum. When I don't get one, I am on the edge of tears the whole time, can't cope with him grizzling in any way, never mind the odd screeching fit and can't motivate to get out of the door.
Have a baby gym group today, that I've already paid for, and really don't think I can get into gear to go. Grrrrr.
It drives me absolutely bonkers that he can sometimes merrily do a 6 hour stretch after his 10:30pm feed, and other nights he's up again at 2am with groans that swiftly disintegrate into screaming. I'm also not convinced he's starving, think he's just rubbish at getting himself back to sleep.

thanks for the sleeping vibes pacita and ninja....NINE HOURS SLEEP!!! from 7.30 til 4.30 then half hour feed and i woke him at 7.30. Amazing

sunshine sounds like youre having a rough time, hope youre managing to stay chirpy. what about if you give the bottles a complete break for a bit, maybe shell forget any issues when you try her again?

Hopefully - GO TO BABY GYM. You will feel so much better, even though it takes effort to get there.

I know what you mean about the night wakings. M slept for so long with just one feed in the night which was fine, but now it's a bit hit and miss and the extra wakings really hit me hard the next day. I just try and say to myself 'it was worse when he was a newborn'.

sunshine - poor Effy, it must be awful for both of you. Have you thought about speaking to a bfc and upping your supply so you only bf. Then when Effy has got over the bottle trauma you can reintroduce ebm in bottles. Just a thought.

plusone you must have STOLEN my sleep vibes - we had 4 hours than 2 (but a very resless 2) then no settling. The normal fog of sleeplessness resumes at the ninja dojo

On a good front though, DD1 is in good work assembly today and we're very proud

sorry ninja...can i keep them a bit longer then i promise i'll give them back?

sunshine, hope things improved soon.

DD and DS keep on taking it in turns to wake, so if it's not one, it;s the other..... so had very little sleep last night, and to top it all, after finally getting DS ready for school between tears and screams, I stepped into a big dog's poo on the way to school, right in front of our gate too, as if the horizontal rain wasn'e enough

ILTMIMI thanks for the kick up the arse - I managed to scrape my hair into a pony tail, throw on some clothes and go, and T loved it! They have lots of mirrors, soft toys, baby slides, bubbles etc, and do a little sinsong thing. Terribly twee, but he was smiling away, and conked out the second we left, so it obviously tired him out as well.

sunflower poor you. Look on the bright side, at least the horizontal rain probably meant sufficient puddles to wash the dog poo away!

plusone I want my sleep vibes back too! Diego was up at 11, 3 and 5. At 5 he decided to poo 10 minutes after being put back in his cot, so had to change him. He was in an excellent mood and decided that it was the right time to chat and coo and smile while having is bottom wiped by his zombie mother.

Very tired.

And hopefully, let me join you in your whinge: why is it that you KNOW they can sleep happily for 6 hours, but they wake up and they are not even that hungry? Like you, my day is ruined if I don't have a decent sleep, and like you, I feel guilty because there are so many other ladies coping infinitely better. (Maybe I should reconsider the second child idea...)

Thanks for all the messages.

I'm afraid BFing not an option as I'm going back to work in 6 weeks so I have to get her to take her milk some other way than through me.

I gave her baby rice yesterday in the hope it would help her sleep. Ha! Every hour from midnight I've been up.

Yikes sunshine I'm so sorry... Now I feel double bad for my whinge.

Does she feed more often at night than during the daytime? Perhaps if you could feed her that often during the day that might help?

Hopefully just saw your message re. sringing (sp!), which I hadn't thought of so might be an option.

Apart from trying to get her to take regular bottles I'm still feeding her myself. She doesn't feed for a long time though and really bobs on and off me (she really chews - it's agony) so she might be hungry at night. Have no idea what to do though.

Have you tried giving her a bottle after she's had a BF? I'm sure you have... And I think someone else might have suggested it, but have you tried abandoning the idea for 2-3 days in the hope she'll forget the stress of it?

pacita I met a woman today whose kids are 18 months apart and I just thought 'how? how are you still alive?'

I hear you hopefully. I guess I'm just a big wuss.

Sunshine - it sounds like baby bootcamp time.

Book yourself a day at the spa and dump her on someone else (preferably someone tough) with instructions that they're not to phone you to come back until she's completed a bottle. My sister babybootcamped my other sister's first child in a weekend.

ninja that sounds fantastic. A friend of mine has just offered to have her for the night to give me a break so I might ask her.

pacita If you wnat Diego tested he will have to be referred to a paediatrican and get tested....your GP can do this.

I am lucky in that mine dont get flare ups that often, but only because I have a rather rigourous routine...like you I regularly use hydrocortizone on both of them morning and night (was a bit worried at first as it is a steriod cream, but have been assured by my sons wonderful paediatrician that such a small dose would not cause harm if used for 100 years!! ) I also use oilatum aqueous cream throughout the day - didnt find diprobase much use. Havent tried Aveeno....is it good? My ds1 also has a cream called Fucibet from his paediatrican - its fab! Dont use it often but its great for flare ups as it has steroid and anti biotic cream in one for when his skin is broken. Sorts it out in no time.

They are bathed 2-3 times per week only unless they are REALLY filthy and then I do not use any bath products at all apart from balneum plus oil when they are having a flare up. (from GP it has got an anti piritic in it which was fab for when ds1 had chickenpox!)

I only dress them in natural fibres (which can be difficult with clothes for older children) and do not use any harsh cleaning products/air fresheners etc...(I use the Method range - you can get it from waitrose, Lakeland and tesco)

I find with my eldest that he gets flare ups when he has been ill - after chikenpox for example. Toby only has one bad area at the moment - much like me.

One other tip - try to keep his finger nails as short as you possibly can - as short as he will tolerate.

HTH x

sunshine Sorry to hear of your feeding woes....

I hesitate to offer advice as I am not a feeding expert and dont want to offend, but we had dreadful problems with my ds1 with feeding from a bottle - he got the hang of it eventually - We had 4 months of hell first though.

Has anyone suggested a soft feeder? Medela make them for babies who find sucking on a bottle difficult/unpleasant/whatever....they are also used for babies like mine who were born early/small/cant suck well.

Just thought it might be worth a try....it may get her sucking on a bottle more effectively so she can progress to a normal bottle and teat...also, are the teats you are using silicone or latex? My son would ONLY suck from a soft NUK latex teat....we had to specially order them from the local chemist (but tesco did sell them at one point)

HTH x

Sorry to hear of your worries sunshine. Can't believe you're back to work in 6 weeks! If memory serves, you work full-time (like me), so you must feel panicked. Never heard of baby boot camp but sounds like your solution perhaps?

Hopefully cannot imagine having 2 to deal with - ever!!!

I am a bit pissed off as today's swim went terribly! Charlotte went into meltdown as soon as we left the pool. She would just not be comforted. I got her dressed and got me dressed (other women staring at us thinking "is she murdering her child" I bet) and as soon as she got into car seat and we were on our way home, she stopped. Just like that. She wasn't hungry, just tired. I have no idea how to cope with this every week as she loves the swim but just gets so tried after and won't be put down while I get dressed (doesn't matter if I get dressed first or she does - same result dressed or not!!). Very stressful.

imoscarsmum the swimming thing will probably get better as she gets older as she'll be able to tolerate being tired a bit better and also won't be as tired as she gets used to the swimming and is used to staying awake longer. Try not to worry about what other people are thinking- they are probably thinking "oh good I'm glad I'm not the only one who has/had a baby that can scream like that"