Ponymum, I am not against dummies myself and believe that if you let your child get attached to using dummies then you have no right to take it off them at some age that suits you. I think that you can bribe or negotiate its removal but not take it off them cold turkey but then I am a softie. My dd1 didn't have a dummy but learnt to steal them off babies at nursery when she was around 11 months old. Eventually she learnt how to suck one and then at about 18 months, I bought her dummies which she used when she was in the car. She has used them from time to time in bed but it never became an frequent thing.
The only other 'dummmy' she had was me.
Remember, a breast is not a substitute for a dummy, remembering MIL telling me 'she is only using you as a dummy'.
A dummy is a substitute for a breast. Babies have a need to suck and breasts need to be stimulated to make milk esp in the early weeks.
Personally I am too much of a slattern to be constantly be replacing a dummy into a baby until they are old enough to find it in the cot/bed by herself. She can use me as a 'dummy' instead.
Oh, using a dummy has nothing to do with making a child independent. When a child has a need and it is addressed, the need goes away, well maybe not as fast as we grown ups would like it to go away, but it will. however, when a need goes unmet, it remains a need and will probably manifest itself later on in another way.
One of my wise friends told me once, how can you make a child independent if he cannot make his own sandwich and wipe his own backside?
not giving him a dummy or sleeping though or eating with utensils at the table or whatever is not going to make him 'independent'. this bit of a rant is mine. enjoy pandering to your baby till they show signs that they want to do it themselves, and boy they will, because after that, they will push you away and you will never get these days back when you can cuddle them and pander to them to your heart's content.