August 2021 - They've been here for half a year

[BertieBotts]

Can you believe it! Our lovely little ones are (roughly) halfway to their first birthdays.

Welcome friends old and new for discussion of sleep, teeth, weaning, milestones, navigating post-baby relationships and the whole existential dread of parenthood... I mean those amazing moments when they make your heart melt. Or produce a poo that makes the wallpaper melt. Oh, all of them. Nothing is off limits because it's just good to know that somebody else has been there.

@kagerou that is hilarious (but still cute!)

@kagerou I particularly love the dribble patch 🥰

Well, today we euthanised the cat. I am so sad. I love her so much. But it was the only option that allowed an end to her being in pain. She has cancer in her eyes which was spreading; even surgery and chemotherapy would only have bought her a little more time and not a great quality of life. So we had to let her go.

The baby was at nursery, which I was glad about. I would have found it hard to be jolly around him today and he wouldn’t have understood. They pick up on distress so easily and it isn’t his fault.

It was the right decision but it was still very difficult. DH and I were both in bits. Neither of us even particularly like cats. We just really liked THAT cat.

@kagerou the dribble patch does make it

Has anyone got any tips on what to do for a baby who can't keep milk down? DS has thrown up all milk since last night and just wondering about dehydration etc? Anyone got any tips? He's not really been ill yet except a brief cold so not really sure what to do!

Oh Random I'm so sorry. It's really hard to lose a loved pet. Be kind to yourselves.

Daffodil fluids is key - any clear fluids so water, breastmilk, maybe diluted juices or herbal/fruit teas. Ice pops are good for older kids, maybe freeze some milk or water into ice lollies? Look up the signs of dehydration on NHS website because it is very serious in babies, and you would need to go to A&E if you see these. Milk is still good to give them as they apparently can get something from it even if they are throwing it up but go slow anyway.

Once he's keeping fluids down you can slowly move onto plain foods and then back to his normal diet.

Thanks @BertieBotts I'll keep an eye. The last bit of milk he kept down was at 11pm, so I suppose at the moment it would be like if he slept through for 12 hours without a feed? After he's woken up I'll try him again (but might take him straight outside!) will try with just water for now I think

@RandomCatGenerator I'm so sorry to read this 💔

Muslins are best for catching baby sick! Because they dry so quickly too.

@BertieBotts muslins would have been severely insufficient for this! It went everywhere. We went through 3 duvets 🙈

The dribble patch truly does make it

@RandomCatGenerator so sorry for your loss , you sound like a great pet mama who did everything you could xx

@Daffodil21 no advice but hope DS is doing better today

@kagerou he's taking milk ok now but he's still not right. His temperature peaked earlier but paracetamol brought it down x

How are things @daffodil21

How are things for everyone? It's gone a bit quiet on here. Everyone busy weaning and enjoying their 7 month olds.

The night before last Rowan slept through the entire night! Then last night she was up 3 or 4 times.... though we discovered she had pooped so I think that had something to do with it.

She's on good form, still a happy wee baby and enjoying her food. We've had a few days of being sick more after her meals but I think it's because she goes on her tummy. I'm not sure if that's a sign of being over fed or not. She still loves the boob milk too during the day and with nursery fast approaching I'm worried on how she'll deal with no boob during the day. She takes her water in her cup at meals but not loads.

Her weird favourite thing to do just now is wiggle her head about while jiggling up and down in her seat! It makes her look like she has something mentally wrong with her tbh but it's just a phase of movement and excess energy! No crawling yet but plenty of army crawls.

My OH is away for a night next week so I've got her on my own for 2 days and a night. I've never had her in my own for that long but hopefully she'll have a good night.

Hi, we've also had a couple nights of sleeping through, though not nights in a row, and as a result getting a 5am wake up!

We are in a hellish week here moving out of London. Alasdair is teething and very frustrated that he's unable to crawl. So much crying. He's happy when held but that's a bit tricky as we're moving house on Wednesday and everything is in chaos and needs packing. I'm sure the upheaval is contributing to how unsettled he is. He also is crying when strangers even look at him, ie friends who have come to help (we've no family around). He seems extra tired wants extra naps and has a horrible teething rash. The next few days will be so rough but I'm just going to be gentle with him, keep him in the carrier and try to make the transition smooth, and focus on how nice it will be to have more space.

Hi ladies! I need to catch up with the thread.

A quick update from me is that I've finally had help with my MH on the NHS, I'm starting therapy to deal with my anxiety soon and I have an official diagnosis of PTSD following recurrent baby loss, the stresses of my third trimester etc. I will be offered further counselling for this as well. It feels like the weight has been lifted off my shoulders that somebody finally listened and diagnosed what I knew deep down was the case for the best part of the last 3 years. I have hope - I don't think I'll feel worse as a result and this in itself is a positive.

Also after a long few weeks of soul-searching, I've decided to separate from DH. He knows now. He doesn't want it, but my mind is made up. It won't be an immediate divorce as we have to work out the finances and living arrangements in the best way possible for DS. But this is the task for the next 6-12 months I believe and then it will be all systems go. I've concluded I will not be the only person in this relationship who is driven, organised, juggling the entire mental load, working full time and making more money, and doing vast majority of childcare. And getting frustrated and disappointed because he cannot step up the way he should. And he isn't interested in me and my needs either, I'm the invisible mother. I'm done with this. Totally done. I have another 40 or 50 years to live and they will not be as miserable as this - if I can juggle things in a marriage, I can juggle them on my own too without the drain of constant disappointment and having to think for another adult. This is not my responsibility.

So sorry for being an occasional guest here these days, but I am busy working through some big stuff at the moment, hoping it will all be for the best. 😊 hope everyone is keeping well xx

Well done those babies for sleeping through! We're still nowhere near sadly - though I'm claiming tonight as a victory as this is our first wake up whereas the past three days have been every 45 minutes or so 😵‍💫 he's had quite a bad eczema flare up which we've got steroid cream for and I think that's what's helped tonight.

Rowan also seems to have a dairy allergy which is a real pain - especially as it means I'm off the dairy too! My lack of sleep meant that at playgroup yesterday I totally forgot I wasn't meant to have so put milk in my coffee and didn't realise at all until we were out at lunch later and a friend ordered an oat milk coffee and I remembered 😂

Still no interest in movement here, but I'm taking that as a blessing as life is much easier while he stays in one place

@WolfMother326 that sounds so tricky for both of you, I hope he settles a bit for you, and as you say, extra space will be lovely so all worth it in the end!

@PurplePansy05 so glad to hear you're getting the support you need, it sounds really validating to get told 'officially' what you already knew in yourself? And sorry to hear about your marriage, that must be a lot to manage now, even though from what you're saying it sounds like just the right decision for you

Sorry but what the fuck is sleep? 😴😴😴😴

It's been virus city here for the last 6 weeks and I don't know how much longer I can stand it :( :(

Pansy good for you. It's so depressing what society expects from men supporting new mothers. It's not easy being on your own but at least you know you can rely on yourself.

Our one night of sleeping through was exactly that... once! She's back to every 3 hours now. Sigh.

I'm glad you've made the decision Pansy. Once made I bet that felt like a relief and you can get on moving forward. Sorry that it came to that though.

@Ready2020 he's fine now but turns out it was Covid as I now have it too. I did isolate him just in case and glad I did now! I have to say I'm surprised he responded like that to Covid - I thought if he had it we wouldn't really know (we decided we wouldn't test him).

@PurplePansy05 this absolutely sounds like the right decision. It's very brave to be going it alone with a baby, but it sounds like you were taking on everything yourself anyway, so I guess this way you don't have the added battle of your 'partner' constantly letting you down. I'm sorry it's come to this and hope you're ok - we're all here as usual x

@WolfMother326 sorry I was so slow to reply when you were still in London! Moving is shit and with a baby super shit. But extra space IT WILL BE WORTH IT!! Good luck and I hope all straightens out for you soon.

@RandomCatGenerator all power to you and much love ❤️ ❤️❤️

Jesus I’m exhausted after a few days of being quite ill - @PurplePansy05 that should have said; I did not mean to tag myself…🤦‍♀️

@RandomCatGenerator I'm a big cat lover myself and it breaks my heart you've lost yours, you've clearly loved her so much ❤ I feel for you, our cat had to be PTS a couple of years ago and it was a real heartbreak. I still miss her.

Also agree re moving being a shit thing to go through...I'm probably facing this relatively soon again but honestly don't want to think about it, I hate it so much 🙈

@Daffodil21 So sorry Elliott has been poorly. You're the second person this week saying their baby had covid and it affected them more than they thought it would. I'll be honest, I've stopped thinking about covid much by now but perhaps should be more cautious still.

Thank you all for your support. I think things will be on the up soon, well, at some point. The only way is up from here. xx

Three quick weaning questions from me:

• When should they start eating lukewarm or warm food? Everything Leo eats is room temp or cold atm.

• Shellfish. I've asked before but still none the wiser. I'd like to try him but not sure how to introduce, shall I pull off a crab linguine/marinara? Or say prawns & potato mash? Meal suggestions/combinations would be welcome, please!

• Water. So I've freaked out a bit after I read online that Lucy Mecklenburgh's son had water going into his lungs when he was drinking which was something nobody was aware of and he effectively nearly silently drowned in his cot one night and now has to be on thickened fluids. Now, obviously this could be exaggerated and surely must be extremely rare. But I'll be honest, my DS isn't good at drinking from anything else than a bottle. An open cup, he'll have an odd sip but it's really awkward and he chokes/coughs back out a lot. The 360 Munchkin cup, he worked it out once and refuses to use it since. I bought the Tommee Tippee sipping cups and he absolutely hates them. I'm close to giving up on offering water and I don't know how I'm supposed to teach him to drink it properly and make sure it goes down the right way?!

Any tips will be gratefully received!

Another question, when is everyone starting to put suncream on them? Is next month too early (assuming it'll be sunny)? xx