August 2016. Anyone got the hang of their babies yet?!!

[plimsolls]

Thought I'd start a new thread. Unimaginative title but E has spent the whole day grizzling/feeding/sleeping on me so I'm running on limited capacity!

I wonder if the weaning advice varies slightly depending on blw or puree? Babies manage to have milk for months before they can sit up - but for finger food you really would want them upright.

Yep, premmie babies galore. I comfort myself that DD is only just 5m corrected. Am in denial about her being 6m! (Though to look at her, you would never know now) And, although she is a sicky baby, it isn't reflux so she is happy. Happy to lie down, wakes up smiling and chatty. After the howls of dismay that DS always gave us this is a bit of a revelation! I am actually enjoying the baby stage this time round. Well, most of it 😉

How's everyone getting on?

Am doing okay though feeling a bit stretched. DS has had a sickness bug so has been off nursery recovering. DD has been okay so far thank heavens. My mum is in hospital but I can't visit her until DS is well enough to go to nursery again

Anyway, we seem to have started weaning. I seem to recall with DS that we followed a weird timetable of offering solids approx 1hr after milk. Would it be unreasonable to simply offer her stuff from our plates when we have our meals? As she gets better at eating we would offer snacks in between meals. The idea of a weaning meal plan AND feeding a toddler separately sounds exhausting from the outset!

Hi Biscuits. Sorry to hear about your mum and your son That must be tough on you not being able to visit your mum and always tiring looking after a little one. Yay for weaning! I don't have any answers for you afraid as I just follow the Gina Ford weaning book and I'll be doing it again when the time comes.

I'm trying to get an early night but of coarse I can't sleep. I've been feeling pretty low recently which I think mainly is happening because I'm tired and cold. January blues

Hi biscuits pear I've started giving my DS little bits of finger foods, he's enjoyed chewing on done pear and mango I think because it's so cold on his hot little gums.
I've tried purées and baby porridge and so far he won't open his mouth for a spoon-I though he seemed ready but obviously not quite yet so we will wait.

Hello everyone, not been on here for ages! Life feels pretty manic at the mo, but I love it - DS is changing and developing so fast at the moment!
We've been weaning for a few weeks - started tastes at 5mo and proper weaning a couple of weeks later. He was very ready though - he's a big boy (just under 91st centile) and was showing all the signs of readiness. We're doing a combo of purées and finger foods - he wants to do everything by himself so we spend a lot of time wrestling each other for control of the spoon. Think we'll be switching to him doing it himself ASAP - did the same with DD and she was eating what we ate and largely feeding herself by 8-9mo so aiming for the same again this time. He LOVES food and is all about the strong flavours, so don't think we'll have any trouble.

Sorry you've been feeling low Pear
Are you managing to see folk much at the moment? I only ask because I know my mood can dip loads if I don't have much contact with other adults. The children are lovely but poor conversationalists. Seeing friends helps me a lot. (And I'm normally quite an introvert by nature too!)

I think I will be able to go and visit my mum tomorrow, and then we will all go at the weekend. It's a hr+ each way so realistically I can't go each day.

Thank you Biscuits ** I went to a breastfeeding support group today and went for a walk with a friend on Monday. It is ironically my most busiest week of the month which is helping but also exhausting I really struggle to get the balance right!! I'd love to see friends 1/2 a week but it just doesn't seem to work out that way. I'm alone for weeks and then they all want to see me on the same week Anyway, I mustn't mumble as at least I am seeing friends this week! It is just a real juggling act and my house looks baaaaddddd for it. On the bright side my DS has pooed in the toilet for the second time this week. You would not believe how much time I've had to invest in this

Two toilet poos in one week is amazing! I can believe every inch of energy and time and effort that has allowed you to get to that stage! We had one last week. Now, because he has been unwell, DS hasn't done a poo anywhere since last Friday 😱

If you ever find the balancing point for home/family/friends then let me and probably half of MN know please!

This thread disappeared from my list again!

Sorry to hear you are feeling a bit down pear I find getting out for a walk helps me.
biscuits I have found the new relationship with some of my friends quite didficult, after the initial period where they all wanted to coo at the baby things have definitely cooled off now and I do feel quite left out of the loop. I'm one of the first to have a baby.

four you sound so upbeat and happy! Glad to see DS is enjoying weaning to some extent too.

I'm going to do baby led weaning so I don't start until next week. I'm too lazy to purée so I'm just going to let her get on with it! I'm pretty sure she will be fine as she is attempting to grab everything that I eat at the moment. I also dread the thought of timetabling and planning so I'm just going to give her stuff from my dinner, obviously with no salt on it. And I'll start with soft textures.

I hope everybody is doing well! I'm really enjoying this stage - DD is starting to sit up, just about roll over and is a bundle of smiling gigglyness in the day. Although, night time sleep is still awful, I'm back to cosleeping with an all night buffet on offer to at least get some sleep!

Biscuits I hope your DS has pooped by now?

A I understand how you feel about your friends drifting away now that they've had their cuddles. I suffered from this terribly with my first and then again with my second (which is dumb because I should have been immune by now) but it's v hard when you have friends who don't have children and have no understanding along with it. I'm sure some childless friends are brilliant out there but not mine!

Finally caught DD's cold. After another rough night waking numerous times DH has given me a little lie in and we're now off to the farm...once we're all dressed. It is freeeezzzing!!!

Poo FINALLY happened yesterday morning. 6 days?!?! Tummy bug hasn't helped things though.

Drifting friendships...yes, this happened quite a bit after DS was born, and all childless friends. It hasn't really happened any further with DD coming along and in the interim I have made some good 'mummy friends' which has made a massive difference to my mental wellbeing this time around on mat leave.

I think that for some folk babies / young children can be quite triggery if they themselves want but don't or can't have children of their own.
Also, parenthood changes so much. Not the core essence of who we are necessarily but if nothing else, I predominantly socialise between 10am and 4pm Mon-Fri, and it's a self-selecting bunch of folk who are free then. Weekends are often us trying to do stuff as a family, and any socialising tends to still involve other children otherwise it's quite dull for DS.

Anyway, thank heavens it is Friday. I am exhausted after this week. I managed to visit my mum and heavens, there's so much complex stuff going on, I barely know where to begin. DH had his ear thoroughly talked off last night!

Ahh that's good that you finally managed to visit your mum Biscuits.

I'm really sicky poo now with a full on cold and cough Feel really crap. I can't help spluttering over DD too as the more I try not to cough the worse it is DH is trying to help but it's just not enough and as per normal he just can't seem to take over. It's always the bare minimum with him. Like tonight. She slept on me from 6-9 and I had to really hint that I'd like a break and something to eat Then at 11pm I asked if I could go to bed after feeding her and he was fine about that. Dd by some miracle then slept until 3:30 and DH fell asleep on the couch (with her in the basket downstairs). He brings her up to feed and I've struggled to wind her and I've literally just had to beg for his help again and now we've fallen out...again. It's just beg beg beg all the time and of coarse she did a big burp for him straight away Anyway, needless to say neither of us are coping very well with the lack of sleep at the moment DD is doing some sleep regression thing at almost 6 months (technically 5) where she mainly has to sleep on us and has been up in the night on average 6 times this past week. Teething has a lot to do with it and I keep forgetting to order a amber anklet...maybe because I'm sceptical that it's just another expense that won't work

So now I feel bad and DH has stormed off with DD to settle her I do really appreciate everything he does and he's been great (especially for getting me dairy free subway takeout late last night and finding dairy free donuts). I just feel like I have to ASK too much. Well, nearly all the time I guess that's just how it is

Am I expecting too much? Bare in mind that DH has a lot less work this week and weekend so can be more hands on.

I guess I'll need to talk to him tomorrow. DH is looking really unhappy and tired at the moment. I guess it's just hard on us both. We thought DS was hard work with reflux and to have our second baby with reflux caused by a CMPA I guess is just a double whammy Still, we know there is light at the end of the tunnel I do take great enjoyment that things are ever so slightly easier with DD (like she lies down in the pram carrycot and enjoys the sling - both DS hated). She is just so smiley. You've just got to enjoy everything, even the bad bit sometimes

Oh Pear. In short, no, you aren't expecting too much. You are both DD's parents. I know a bf baby means a lot falls on the mother's shoulders but unless his head is thoroughly in the sand I would have thought he would see that you were struggling at times.
That said, people aren't mind readers and it's only fair that you are able to have a conversation together about what you both need to get through this phase (and they need to be realistic things, not 'I need 8hrs sleep or else'). Without understanding why he is doing what he is doing then it is hard to be tolerant of the behaviour.

At the end of the day, parenting in a relationship is teamwork. That looks different for every family but the sense of working together is ideally still there.

DS was a cmpa reflux baby. I truly do understand how tough it is xx

pear so hard with so little sleep and you must be chronically sleep deprived and exhausted. I think it sounds you need a chat with DH because the last thing you need is adding animosity at 4 in the morning. Would it work to have an agreement that one of you does 10-2 the other 2-6 except feeds? We always swap in the mornings here too, I've just slept in until 9 DH had all of the children from 6:30-9 now he's gone back to bed and will probably sleep until 12. It's not ideal but does make a difference.

So, we ended up having a sensible chat at 5am. DH is very stressed about things in his business not going well and he's grieving his dad. On top of that he says that he's found the week v hard suddenly not getting continuous sleep and admits that he's just very bad at it (aren't we all ). Anyway, it's very interesting and helpful to have your feedback and hear how things work in your homes. DH works 7 days a week so on average he helps out more at the end of the day rather then physically been able to help during the night. Since he's been around more last week he's moved back into the bedroom which is why it's fallen on him more to help out. So basically we've agreed that it's just a tough time but it will get better once DD gives us more sleep. I've agreed to give DH a sleep in soon. He hasn't had one in 5 months but that's because I do more in the night but we won't go round and round in circles I'll just give him a lie in if that's what it takes!

So, Dd did the best night sleeping last night in well...maybe ever. So she slept on me from 6pm-9pm then slept on DH from 9-11pm. Woke up to feed. Slept in basket downstairs from 11:30-3:30. Then she slept from 4:30-9:30am I did have a Lemsip at 9pm. Could this have effected her? Is it because she slept on us for the longest time from 6pm? I don't think DH has done the bedtime routine with DS by himself since Dd was tiny. I would love to know what brought this on. Unfortunately if it is the case that it's because she slept on us at the start of the night. Well, obviously we couldn't do that every night

Ah. It is always a mystery as to why babies sleep better some nights than others.

Glad you managed a chat with your dh Pear. Does he also understand what you need?

Here, I do all DD's night wake ups. DH will generally get up for DS if he wakes at all. I get far more broken sleep but DH always gets up with DS and the lark. DH doesn't always get it exactly as I would ideally like (as I'm sure I don't for him) but neither of us have a sense of the other not pulling their weight so that makes pretty much all of it bearable, even if it is exhausting.

Yeah but Biscuits this was a dramatic change. For the last few weeks Dd has been waking up every 1-2 hours! How can she go from that and then do 2 big sleep stints. The sleep in until 9:30 was particularly unheard of!

DH hasn't exactly said he's going to help more. I don't think there is an answer really when his head is elsewhere with work etc.

DH has just got home and I've already settled Dd in her sling so we can just cuddle on the sofa now. TG I didn't need to hint that DH needs to do bedtime with DS. I'm tempted to make another Lemsip but I probably shouldn't. Need to look up what effects it has on bf. Maybe it's not the same as being pregnant?!

I'm not doing too badly. I managed 1 wash and put clothes on the drier. Have done online Tesco shop and DS had homemade soup for dinner after we made Peppa Pig muddy puddle cupcakes. House looks a state though...can't perform miracles

Oh dear terrible night here So I had a coughing fit that woke up the whole house in the night. DH was meant to have a lie in today but instead he had to camp downstairs with DS. Meanwhile Dd woke up whimpering in her sleep twice like she had a very bad dream but as I'm sure they don't dream yet I'm guessing she's badly teething. Her suck is very powerful so that would confirm teeth at my best guess. We've been upright sleeping since 5 but the bonus is it turns out that upright sleeping stops coughing I am so glad that I could reach out for her quickly when she was about to be so upset. It does make it all worthwhile when you can make it all better doesn't it!

Oh and the Tesco shop is arriving soon. I've switched to Tesco's because they do lots of free from dairy food but ironically I wasn't able to order it online so probably won't bother shopping with them again

That's a pain re Tesco.
Coughs are a total pest at night. Inevitably the more you try to suppress it, the more you need to cough :(

We had a so-so night; DS and DD were both up in the night but they both slept until a semi civilised hr this morning.

I managed to speak to my mum before the children woke which was a bonus too. She will likely need to have surgery next week, which ordinarily wouldn't be a massive deal but actually she is so unwell it is now riddled with risks 🙁

So today is a day for hugging everyone close and appreciating what we have.

biscuits how is your mum doing?

How's everybody enjoying weaning? I've just started and DD is loving it! I'm doing baby led so it's quite messy but great fun.

She's still in hospital. She may get home at the end of the week, but she will need to have surgery once she is stronger. I'm visiting every few days - but it's 3-4hrs of driving round trip so can't really manage more frequently than that.

Weaning is going well here too if the nappies are anything to go by. We are doing a mixture of blw and spoon feeding- more the latter at the moment as DD still can't sit unaided.
Hummous, soup, natural yoghurt all popular. And as of this morning, v soupy weetabix once it's turned into soft mush.

Just started weaning. Dd cried after a spoonful of baby rice. It didn't smell very nice to me! Moving onto fruit tomorrow and will try mixing with baby rice. I'm quite determined to follow the same purée routine (Gina Ford) that I did with DS. Hoping Dd agrees!

I'm having major problems with getting into any sort of sleep/feeding routine. I skim read my books today and I'm hoping Dd can get back into some sort of routine soon! Getting her to sleep during the day is just impossible. Poor thing has no idea to self settle at all