June 2013; Toddling into our second year!

[BeanCalledPickle]

New thread ladies:-) I think we filled about ten threads when pregnant and this is only our fourth post natally!

Ha ha - at present I think it's a piper dream so if you're happy to be paid in buttons (literally buttons - plan is for a fabric and pattern company) then you're in.

Today's fun started early. DH booked a surprise family photo shoot today for my birthday and the small child decided today was the day that all clothes were evil and she was NOT getting dressed.

We're also having fun and games at the moment with poo. Little girl has been increasing telling us just after she has done a poo that she needs changing. Anyway this weekend she started telling us before so I thought I'd just put a potty out in case she was interested. Turns out she is very very interested and demands that we take her clothes off so she can practice getting on and off the potty and on and off her nappy. All went well until she got a little distracted and tripped landing on the pointy up bit at the front. Why is it there???? I presume it's for splash backs but the poor wee mite really hurt her bits.

Of course I've taught her that mummy can make all sore things go away by kissing things......

Ha ha we have a potty and polly will ask for a wee wee but I'm not convinced she knows what she means! She gets very upset when she's done a poo and needs changing very quickly. Thank god that wasn't the case when she was tiny!

Any attempts to potty train are suspended due to what happens next. After sitting on the potty she then picks it up and proceeds to hurl it at the door. I can only assume she thinks we are in some manner of Victorian period drama where it was acceptable to throw the contents of your chamber pot in the street. Accordingly we will not be engaging further until Weve routed her into this century....

Yikes. This dangerous and messy potty talk scares me! DS had a phase of bringing me a clean nappy when he'd done a poo but it only lasted a few weeks and he hasn't done it in ages. Pity, I was quite hopeful for a while

I think we're in the wait a bit longer camp though we ought to get a potty I suppose. We might start him off with a stint of sitting on the potty before bath or something like that.

DD is odd as although she tells us if she's going to wee or poo, and asks to go on the toilet, she will happily stay in a dirty nappy, even though she doesn't mind being changed. She's never minded being in a dirty nappy. Apparently DH was the same!

I'm copying my friend and we're going straight for a toilet trainer seat (that attaches to the adult one and you just lift it up and down) and step. Probed for more details as I'd forgotten and she bypassed the potty stage and her child was toilet trained in three days (quicker than I thought) a month before she turned 2 (earlier than I thought) and not long before her sibling was born too. And she's been dry ever since. It may be a rare case but it gives me some hope.

Cup we've got a couple of those trainer seats too. We've also got a step as the loo is too high. So far she's only used the step to get at her toothbrushes though

Cuphat that sounds a bit too good to be true! I assume not at night as well? I can get my head around it at home but dread the need to stop by the side of the motorway because she's screamjng for a poo...

Actually, I like the idea of going straight to a toilet seat thingumy. Surely it cuts out some faff? Mind you, our house is old weird and the toilet is in a separate room to the bathroom. Unless ds has stonkingly good bladder control then there could be a lot of widdled on carpet in the hall before bathtimes.

Can I ask how you all manage work/childcare/practicalities? I'm potentially being offered an extra day of work. Which is good and I'd be a fool not to take it. Simultaneously dh is likely to compress his hrs so to work 5 into 4. We each have a longish commute (just under an hr each way). So 3x week ds would be in nursery 7.30-6, 4x week (including all the nursery days) dh would be out of the house 7-7 and 1x week I would work while ds was with dh. I know this can work but I'm slightly spooked by just how organised we'll need to be all of the time if we ever want to eat/sleep/not be so exhausted that we forget to speak to each other!!! Reassure me please

I think you are pretty much describing what we do as well; I work 90pc of the week in four days, one at home, three in the office. DH does 85pc in four days. Polly is in nursery three days 745 ish till 6ish. I have one day with Her as does DH.

We are tired. It can be stressful. I tend to take her to nursery as DH can reliably leave on time but I can't. We sometimes trade days, we are sometimes late and we probably both feel like We aren't very good at our jobs and our parenting. But. She seems to much prefer nursery to time with us. They are way more structured in their activities than we could ever be and seemingly have limitless enthusiasm.

The big disadvantage is she is often over tired as well. She gets over stimulated and takes ages to wind down.

I'm not sure what the best solution is. For us I know neither of us could be at home full time. We've bith done it. We both hate it. There is a massive advantage in your DH having him a day a week though. Will be so good for his relationship with him. Polly loves Daddy days!

Thanks Bean

In my heart of hearts I know you're right. I'll need to do all nursery pick ups and drop offs, DH will miss bedtimes 4x week but will pointedly do the other 3. It's short term stressful/tiring for longterm gain I guess. I think my main concern is how we manage to look after ourselves both as individuals and as a couple in all of that. I trust work and us as a family to be okay actually.

It does sound too good to be true. Apparently they really focused on it - and didn't leave the house for three days! On the fourth day they started going out and she was fine. Since then (a year ago) she can count the total number of accidents on one hand!

I can't get my head around the going out part - what if there are no toilets nearby? And queues if there are. And carrying a potty around wouldn't work either? Or night-time - I thought they must wee in their sleep!

Much easier in China where they have split trousers and it's common to see people holding their babies over litter bins!

I was in a car with another friend who had to stop at the side of the road when her DD said she needed a wee. She stopped and we were there a while but the child didn't do anything! Saying that, her child toilet trained really quickly too (at the same age) so she can't complain too much!

Mrs, yes it does cut out the faff. That was my friend's reasoning; that you'd have to teach them to use the toilet eventually anyway.

You can get those very expensive travel pottys. Which is basically like a nappy bin with a seat.

I'll have to have a look at those. I'm not looking forward to it at all!

My neighbour just walked around with a normal potty in a plastic bag. think its a bit like breastfeeding - you feel self conscious until you realise everyone goes through it and no one gives a crap.

DH had an interesting experience tonight. Lil wanted to take her clothes off and shout poo at him a lot. Then she took her nappy off and lo and behold there was a mighty poo in it. Then there was poo everywhere else too!

at the poo sunny.

You're right, everyone goes through it but I've never actually seen someone get a potty out in public.

And don't get me started on breastfeeding. I always felt slightly self-conscious in public. I worry too much about what other people think and the media don't help. I can't wait to get it over with this time but I'd like to get to at least a year again.

Ooh, I've missed lots of interesting chat! It's great to hear how everyone manages the work/kid balance. I don't think I could handle being a full-time SAHM but would also very much hate to work full time. I was so lucky to get a job (after being made redundant on mat leave!) that allows me to work two days only, both of these from home. DP is freelance and not tied to particular days so he looks after DS on my two working days, I look after DS the next two days and we give each other a day off each too to do our own non work/non childcare thing too and still have a family day for an outing. So we have no childcare/nursery. DS goes to several groups (play groups, Tumble Tots) during the week but he is very happy to play himself with toys and books at home. This stage is much easier than the baby stage, in my opinion. I remember having NO time at all to do anything at baby stage. In other news, our sleep therapy worked! We are now pretty consistently getting full night sleep throughs!!! DS does wake at around 6ish now though, which is a bit tough. We had been getting 730am starts before. Can I ask what time is bedtime in your houses?
Good luck with the business idea, Sunny!

Yay for the sleeping, sunbeam! Bedtime is 7pm here with around a 7am wake up usually (varies a bit). We found that when DD went to bed later she would wake up earlier - strange but true! I was worried about making bedtime earlier (it was DH's idea) but it worked! We naturally wake up between 6-6.30am but we were getting 5am starts at one point!

That's great news re sleep Sunbeam

Bedtime is 6.30/7 and he goes to sleep easily. He gets up 11-12hrs later on the whole.

He's developed a new cry. One filled with 'mummymummymummy'. But even in his sleep too

Big news from us - we removed the bars from her cot last night and not only did she stay in bed but she gave us a lie in and slept til 8!

Ooh...might have to try that! Did you put a barrier up to stop her falling out?!

nope- her bed is so low that I didn't think it would be a problem if she fell out. We thought now would be a good time since she can't yet open the door so she's still at least contained in the room.

I'd say we were pleasantly surprised to find that there wasn't an entire bookshelf in her bed and she wasn't wearing 7 jumpers and 4 nappies this morning.

Lost you for a while but am back and having a catch up. I'm impressed by taking the cot bars down Sunbeam, there's no way we will try that for a while, I do not trust dd one little bit! Nor can I imagine doing the potty thing just yet. I think I'll give it a go in the summer, but I just dont' think she'd get it yet.

I fully sympathise with the work-life discussions. I worked nearly FT with DS and it was a hard balancing act, but having left my job after dd was born (due to moving back to the UK) and now being a SAHM I'm suprised I don't miss it work all. I was always very career focused and had a career you do for love not money (marine conservation scientist) so I really thougth I'd mind not working.

I managed to go out for dinner with dh the other night (first time in 5 months?!) and in our chat he finally admitted that yes he'd much rather have 3 dc than 2. I'd kind of thought we were done, but am now coming round to the idea. The fact that ds starts school in Sep makes it seem less daunting as it would only be 2 dc home during the day and dd could start preschool. Still, it is a slightly terrifying thought and I am a bit worried about additional risks of being that bit older. Anyone here with 3 DC, how do you cope??!

Ok so I spoke waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too soon about the bars off her cot.

Night 3 was fun.

Seriously. A laugh a minute.

How many times did she get up?!

3 times. I found her at half 12 crying on her bedroom floor. She refused to get back into bed so I was naughty and let her sleep with me.

Tonight it appears to be going much better though I'll wait til morning to call it a success.

Very brave venture, Sunny! Hope last night was better.
I'm scared to change anything now we are getting sleep throughs!
Hey, we bought a campervan at the weekend. Crazy or cool??