July 2013 - Part 1. Remember your pelvic floor exercises!

[TotallyEggFlipped]

Time to start the post-natal thread.

And start those PELVIC FLOOR EXERCISES!

Thanks Lanclass and Thinking - ds2 was v brave and charmed the nurses and drs and j was well behaved. Home now and he seems OK.

Beginning - hope the increased meds work quickly and prevent further bouts of pain. Hope you had fun swimming. We started ds1 and ds2 swimming when v young (ds2 was 2 months) and they both love swimming nowadays. Hoping to get j in to swim classes in september - just waiting for the 6 week check to check out his umbilical cord first.

Swimming was great, Theo cried initially because it was cold but chilled out and seemed to enjoy it, manage about 25 mins before he started getting too cold. Mum had lots of smiles and chat when she was getting him dry. Hoping to find something more regularly in September
thinking I've not heard of it but it sounds like that would make it difficult for bubba to latch properly.

I've heard of lip tie before Thinking - the treatment is more involved than for tongue tie but may be worth considering if its a severe one.

Glad DS2's Op went well, dinky

lancslass - hope you enjoyed your trip to London. I think maybe we should get one of those routine things........eventually.

I hope the increased dose sorts out Theo's reflux, Beginning

We had a great day and DD1 was great, despite missing out on her nap and getting pretty tired by the afternoon. She fell asleep for the last 25 minutes of the journey home, but was great when I woke her up to meet my rents & brother for dinner out. N also slept in the car & in the sling at the park, so is very well rested. Just trying to get her off to sleep in her cot now.

Hope everyone has better nights tonight.

Glad you had a good day Totally - hope its followed by a good night.

J has made up for the sleep deprivation by giving me a couple of proper big open mouthed smiles today. So so worth it.

I can't believe it- I've slept loads! Elka was asleep from 11 til 3 yesterday afternoon, dh and I thought we were going to have a rough night because she slept so much in the day. She went to bed roughly around 9 then woke at 12 then woke at 4.30! Surly this is just a lucky one off?

She wasn't sleeping much in the day before, just constantly feeding.. I guess all that food needed growing time?!

Glad you've had a good night nexus.

We're having a bad few days - the book did warn us that week six wasnt pretty

Although our biggest issue is trapped wind in her gut. She is bf and rarely swallows air whilst feeding, but does chew her hands a lot. I think most of the wind is from my diet as I have also been very windy at the moment.

But she is obviously uncomfortable and not sleeping well as a result.

Any advice on how to help shift it? She rarely brings any up when winded (unles I know she swallowed a gulp), we windmill her legs - esp in the evening, are doing warm baths and baby massage.

Help...

Hello! Just catching up on pages of thread - it's amazing how the days fly by and I keep meaning to update but never quite manage.

Dinky glad all went well with DS2 yesterday. Amazing that all your mini-Dinkies have been the same weight at this stage!

Quin there is chat upthread about excluding particular foods to try to help. Not something I have much experience of, but am sure someone more knowledgeable will be along soon.

Nexus v jealous of your sleep - Junior Panda is finally sleeping so I really should do the same!

JP was weighed yesterday. 3.5 weeks and 5kg so growing happily on the 91st centile . I bathed him in the bathroom sink the other day, but can't see him fitting in ito for much longer!

Otherwise he has been quite crotchety and only seems to settle after hours of sucking at the expense of my poor nipples . He has a snotty nose and what looks like an eye infection which I'm sure isn't helping. So, lots of velcro-baby action and not much quality sleep for me.

One question - night sweats... are these normal after giving birth? How long do they last? Please say the end is in sight! Also (sorry, two questions!) are swollen glands in the armpit to be expected? I'm exclusively BFing. Am saving these for the GP at my 6 week check, but it's a little way off as yet.

Impressed at anyone attempting routine and venturing into the big wide world... Right. Going to try getting a few hours rest. Sorry this is so enormous!

PS. Not much mention of pelvic floors so CLENCH, people, CLENCH!

Clenchingpanda - night sweats normal - normally pass by 6 weeks. Swollen glands in armpit could be engorgement - try the old cabbage leaves on them to see if they go down.

Quin - ds2 had trapped wind - it was awful. We did all you did too - and i drank camomole tea by the bucketload. Cranial osteo helped a lot though. Make sure she gets lots of tummy time during the day too.

Nexus - glad you had a good night.

Night sweats can be normal but in conjunction with glands up I'd want to exclude mastitis. Any pain/redness/lumpiness Panda?

B did her first stint of inconsolable screaming last night. Didn't want to feed, didn't want to be held, couldn't get any wind up. Only lasted for half an hour but it reminded me of just how bloody tough it is - colic, wind, whatever "causes" it, I can't believe we coped with months of evenings like that with DS1, much sympathy to any of you with screamers. She eventually settled sucking DH's knuckle and then settled to feed, so who knows what was up...

Anyway she then redeemed herself with her longest sleep yet - 10.30-4.45, quick feed and she's still asleep now.

Right, loads to do as we are off on holiday for 2 weeks (to Wales) tomorrow, so much to pack! (not so much for B as for the toddler - B is happy with just boobs!)

Morning all, glad that some of you managed to get a bit of sleep at last and seem to be getting on with things v well indeed. Dinky I hope your ds2 is now on the mend. Can't imagine the worry for you, and with a newborn too.

Had a visit from HV yesterday, F is now a whopping 9lb. So at least I'm getting the feeding right even if I'm being a crap mum in all other respects. We had chat about my PND but I just felt a lot worse for it. I'm trying to keep it all together but I do feel rather inadequate after what was said. Probably just the PND clouding my view though. I'm not overkeen on medication and I'm not really sure how counselling would help. Maybe the circumstances of the birth affected me more than I thought.finding mumsnet really helpful though. Fat easier to type on here than talk in RL.

Clenching panda have you tried a squirt of milk for the eye? Can work wonders apparently!

I saw another thread that I think is yours, shelley? Huge hugs to you, please don't feel like you are a crap mum, that really is the PND talking. Keep chatting to MN, I agree it's much easier to be honest on here. When do your schools go back? Do you have many plans for the older ones, can you ship them off for some playdates?

Btw to those stressing about too much daytime sleep meaning not enough at night, that's really not our experience. I let B sleep whenever and wherever she wants - sometimes can be most of the day asleep in the sling, sometimes much more awake, but from week one she has always had good nights. I honestly think it's just down to temperament.

Btw shelley I really do think it's worth strongly considering trying the medication. Is there any particular reason you'd rather avoid it?

quin for wind whats working for us is waiting for a natural break in the feed to stop and hold j upright with his head above my shoulder.and his stomach flat.against my chest, wait for the big burp then put him back on..it is helping however I wish babies would let go before they start squirming with wind, my boobs look like mont blanc

clenching check to see if your boobs feel hot, have a hard patch or red and streaky. I had a bad fever with mastitis and the above.

how are your boys this morning dinky

mrs I meant to respond to your post before...my dh got the first smile two days ago, I was outraged (I'm so competive) ! I spent the whole of the next day singing to J, clapping, dancing..nothing. he's showing more affection towards our stairs and stripy sofa (the former he also saved his first giggle for) but I got a grin this morning. no coos, just a good sea lion impersonation. how about you?

Oh I don't know vinegar, I'm just not keen on taking medicines in general. Would always rather try everything else before I take anything. Probably because there are members in my family have to take loads of tablets for various things and I don't want to end up like that really! I also really want to see if I can snap out of it on my own, though if course if it's down to a chemical imbalance that could be tricky.

Think I've been inside too much with my thoughts. Once I'm back into running about with not a minute to myself I may be ok...

why what did she say shelley? pnd plus over tiredness is prob exasperating your feelings but youre not being a bad mum and the weight gain is excellent.

enjoy your Holiday vinegar hope the weather cheers up for you

lanclass how.was your.trip to london, is lancs your location? if so thats a big journey.

sorry about the split post its.the only way I can remember whats been said

Thanks Vinegar and Dinky. Breasts are otherwise fine - no mastitis (autocorrect prefers martinis to mastitis... and so do I!). And I'm they're not hard, overly lumpy or uncomfy, and F feeds like a pig in a trough dream so I guess the glands aren't anything to lose sleep over. Chance would be a fine thing ...

Shelley, the eye is looking loads better this morning - hurrah! We have been washing with breast milk, leading to milk shooting everywhere and much hilarity! I didn't realise it came out with such force!

Shelley, please do keep talking and posting here if it's a useful outlet for you. Sounds like your feeding is going brilliantly and I'm sure you aren't a crap mum - it isn't easy and it's okay not to be enjoying it 100% of the time or to admit you find it hard. Please do give a thought to counselling, especially as the birth experience wasn't great for you, and taking through everything with a trained person may help you in processing it, and how the birth is linked to how you feel now. Also as Vinegar says, meds are worth considering - they aren't generally used long-term and can really make a difference.

Shelley sorry you feel so down. You really aren't a crap mum. You had a tough time in the lead up to the birth and do a great job with very little help. Like other posts say, could you consider counselling especially as you think you have too much time with your thoughts? I had always dismissed it but decided to go last year and it did wonders.

Shelley - big hugs here. You're not a crap mum. Being a mum is bloody hard work - its tiring, relentless and never ending. And that's with just one. With 3 its 3 times as hard - believe me I know. My sister has battled with depression (still is) - the meds were the first step to her feeling better, as she got more like herself (and less lost in the dark) she stepped off the meds to counsellor based therapy and from there to managing the depression through a holistic lifestyle. If the help is there, and you're still not feeling like yourself in September, please do consider the meds - they really arent a forever thing. Glad F is growing nicely, especially after how tough you found things at the start - you're doing a great job clearly.

Vinegar - good to hear even angel placid babies get the screams. Hope she's got it well and truly out her system now and you have a fab holiday in Wales.

Cheek - thanks for asking about the boys. DS2 being remarkably resilient thanks. J being rather chilled on the whole today too - though now hear him calling...

Also cheek - DS2 reserved his first smiles and giggles for our radiator, sofa, book cases etc. DH and I used to say he was clearly a baby interior decorator in training laughing at our decor. J seems rather taken with our window treatments and wall art

thanks mrsd. without prying, how did you find it helpful? what did they do exactly? i cant see how it would help in my case - whats happened with the birth has happened and i just need to get on IYSWIM? Compared to lots my birth was v easy!

Shelley I had just had the molar pregnancy and had had some real issues with friends I would normally confide in. I found it really liberating to rant to someone who had no emotional attachment to me at all. She was kind but professional and "called me" on a lot of what I was feeling. She also gave me a lot of material to read which helped me to understand how my mind was working. I would go back to her in a heart beat!!

Panda when JP won't fit in the bathroom sink, there's always the kitchen sink - DD1 had baths in the kitchen sink at my parents house when their bathroom was out of action when she was almost 2.
Worth getting checked out re: swollen glands as Vinegar says. My first thought was to exclude infection. I had mastitis weaning DD1 and had fever, sweats and feeling yuck well in advance of any boob signs.

Vinegar - glad the screaming was short-lived and B continues to be totally chilled. at the great sleep!
Have a fab holiday.

Shelley - you are not a crap mum. Depression makes you remember all the negative things and forget all the positives so you get an altered idea of reality. eg if you drove somewhere through 10 sets of traffic lights and 5 were red and 5 were green when you got to them, a 'normal' person thinks of it as a neutral journey, but if you're depressed you remember all the lights being against you. You need to find a way of recognising all of the positives in your day (write them down - it helps!)
Post on MN if it helps. It can be easier to express yourself online than talking face to face.
Whatever you do, don't blame yourself. PND is due to hormones & is so common (but undiagnosed) that it's probably more 'normal' to be depressed than not.