March 2013 - still too sleep deprived to think of a funky title

[StormyBrid]

Old thread here.

We seemed to be running out of space (again) so I made us a new thread.

time for a - get your dh to do that for you.
If the baby is going crazy anyway maybe it's time to send DH in there to enable you time to get out and have a breather of fresh air/chat to a friend on phone/have a drink. You'll be doing yourself a big favour if you give yourself a break.
Try some white noise maybe? Pop the fan on even if it's facing away from her just to give a bit of soothy noise?
These guys are open til 10pm cry sis so they might be worth a chat.
I'm sorry you're having a crappy time Soyo. You are 4+ months in and doing a bloody marvellous job. We're all in awe.

soyo - take a deep breath. Tuck her in as tight as you can with a sheet. Give her something to cuddle/chew on. Give her some Dentinox. Play some lullaby music. Then try shushing with your hand on her chest until she settles down. Keep telling her it's bedtime, time to go to sleep. If she howls, pick her up and cuddle until she calms down then repeat. Try and stay calm whilst you do it. Be prepared to stay with your hand on her for a while. Hope this helps

Thank you all, I hope you know you've repeatedly saved my sanity over the last 6m. DH took over and she screamed at him for 15min while I calmed down. I then walked her round for a while while she calmed down, put her down and kept a hand on her and sang to her while she went to sleep. I think she's tire herself out screaming which makes me feel so terrible. Hopefully I'll do better tomorrow. I need to find my zen calm again! I had it a couple of weeks ago but it's all gone again. Maybe wine will help? I'm sure chocolate will!

So pleased to hear your dh stepped in to help. I know it feels shit hearing them cry when you're trying your best but sometimes that's just how it is. She's warm, safe, fed and loved, and when you've done everything you possibly can its important to remember yourself. I suppose what I'm attempting to say through the rambling is that you're not leaving her to cry it out, but maybe she needs to settle in her own time. You're trying your best, and doing incredibly well.

How about chocolate, wine and a nice bath? All at once?

Sorry I missed this Soyo, but glad you've got somewhere now. I often sit with DS while he whinges and occasionally howls before going to sleep. I won't leave him to cry it out but as Plonky says, when you know they are fed, changed, warm and sleepy (!) then just being with him while he settles seems to help. He looks at me and eventually turns away and goes to sleep. He knows now that while I will sometimes stroke his cheek, once he's in bed, then that's it. It can be hard to listen to them cry, but it doesn't often happen for long now.

Mind you, screamy day yesterday and Velcro baby. Got wonder week email in my inbox - connected ?

No rolls yet here Plonky, flips to either side and plays there, but then flips back rather than finishing the job. Doing sterling efforts at sitting though, doesn't need support as such, just a guiding hand.

I'm glad you had some help soyo and fx for an easier night ahead for you. You're really quite the inspiration, so I agree with the wine, chocolate and bubble bath, sit back and know that you are supermum!

So, SIL is in labour, I don't know about any of you but I really don't envy her right now!

First wake up! That's the longest sleep for ages. Thanks all, you're all fab .

Pud Mini-Yo loves rolling but is cack at sitting up, she just tries to straighten her legs and throws herself back, isn't it funny how they all do things in a different order.

Something I know exactly what you mean, I still see pregnant women & think 'you poor sod, you've got no idea what you're in for those first few weeks'. I see this as a good indicator that the next one is never going to happen a long way off.

Aww but Something she'll soon be cuddling a snuffly wee newborn. What I don't envy is how she's going to feel in about five days.

Pud we have the same, he can sit unaided for a few moments and can roll onto his side but has no interest going any further.

Ds grumped at 4.30 am, so I went to put him in our bed. The moment he saw me he started laughing. I've decided to see this as a Cute Thing and not take it personally.

Hugs to SoYo, and be proud of yourself, lass - you're doing an incredibly hard thing and coping brilliantly.

Fishtank clearly worked too well. DD fed at 12.45 and 5.20. Still asleep now. I'm only awake because the cat just jumped onto my head. How on earth do I fit four feeds in today? Even with only 3.5 hours in between it'll have to be late to bed. What to do?

Fish tank sounds awesome. I'd follow her lead with feeds for a few days and see if she's happy to develop a new routine. DS pretty much forced me to do this earlier in the week and he's so much easier now. I'd just see it as this : you managed to get on top of her feeds, now you've nailed sleep too, so work around the sleep as she clearly wants it.

Has anyone else with a teething baby found that their appetite has just dropped? DS has gone from clearing five 8floz bottles a day to just four, and doesn't wake during the night for milk. Sometimes he just chews the teat and pulls his disgusted face if any milk makes it onto his tongue. He's 19lbs!! How is he getting enough milk?!

I've just mowed the garden and I feel terrible. Evicted three frogs and a million tiny butterflies, a d chopped a slug in half. I didn't want to do it but the neighbours keep getting cats bum faces whenever they look at my dilapidated hovel.

Dunno if it's teeth but we've got reduced appetite here. My personal theory is she's noticed we're giving less feeds, is very happy about this, and is drinking even less because those silly big people must have finally got the message about milk being poison. She keeps wanting to stop after three ounces. Daft child!

As for gardens, I've an unemployed mate who does ours for beer money. Very useful!

Any news something? I'm so jealous, I'd love another. Won't be having one any time soon though after today's depressing trip to the gynae. I'm booked in for an exploratory op under general next week to find out wtf is going on in there, and oh, as a bonus the PCOS I spent years clearing out of my system through eating a positively obsessive low GI diet is back. Badly. No great surprise really with the chaotic food intake I get these days, but depressing none the less.

SoYo I'm wishing a long settled night your way. You have definitely earned it. I'm wishing everyone else that too, but you get first dibs.

Stormy and Plonky yes, appetite is up the swanny here too. The tiddler has a new and tedious way of eating. She will down 3floz, burp, fart, grizzle, and then point blank refuse to eat anything else for about 15mins. After a play, roll and general arse about she will be up for another go. It usually takes about 3 goes and 2 breaks to clear a feed. Huge sigh.

Well done on the mowing Plonky. How do you fit that round ds? Serious question.... I'm getting nothing done, and any tips gratefully received.

Final thing - I need some advice. I have upset a friend. I have no idea how I have upset this friend, but as she is lovely, has always been there for me, and I owe her big time for many things how do I fix it? I am being blanked. DH is being blanked. My texts are being blanked. I am too damn scared to go round there (but I know I have to). What should I do? Bake a cake and grovel? I'm rubbish at this stuff. I have a male brain.

Fx for a good night Soyo.

Plonky, appetite all over the place here too. As is his boob feeding - often rejecting a side completely but then taking a top up bottle . I keep telling myself that as I will have to start winding down from the end of this month (I return to work 26th sept) then perhaps it's for the best if he's doing it for me, but I had hoped we had a couple more weeks...

Worse, hugs for the pcos and op and stuff. That all sounds pretty grim. Glad they've obviously started taking things seriously after your nagging last week but sorry it's not better sounding news. Hopefully they can work out what's going on and get you back on track ASAP though. And if you've beaten the pcos before, then you can again - and your body knows what to do now. Fx all goes smoothy.

As for your friend, tricky one... Another male brain here but your plan for cake and upfront asking sounds good. You really have no idea what it's about? Could she have other stuff that's nothing to do with you that's got her distracted? Hope you can sort it out though.

Oh no Wors, crappy that you need an op but guessing what it is its over in 10mins and you should feel fine if a bit grotty after. It would be good to find out what's happening and get sorted! As for the PCOS, your hormones will still be everywhere so give it another 6m and then see where you are. Don't write anything off, my DM was 42 when she had me (ancient then) and she's awesome ad still only looks about 55 plus she's thinner and fitter than me

Thanks for the sleepy vibes, she went down ok this evening but we'll see where it goes from here.

Any idea what your friend might be annoyed about? If you can figure that out it might be easier to fix!

Ooh ooh I know Something's news . I had a lovely visit with her and gorgeous DS today. Despite something's boy giving mine one to one tuition, DS still hasn't rolled.

Worse I'm sorry to hear you're having a tough time. Is it back to the low GI diet then? Hope the surgery goes ok and you get the results you're hoping for. Wrt the friend, how would a well considered gift go down? Perhaps something relating to an in joke that only she'd understand, or hand picked flowers? I'm something of a social hippo though (fat and clumsy) so probably best to wait for advice from someone with a heart more emotional intelligence!

Oh and the gardening was pure luck. DS fell asleep in his pushchair at 9.30. We got home ten mins later and I left him on the front in it and just got on with the lawn with the proviso that I'd stop the moment he woke. I brought him in when I'd finished and managed to Hoover, clean the kitchen and blitz two bathrooms. I then had to wake him at 11.20 for a bottle! As I say, pure luck.

Sonething's DS totally ended up holding hands with my boy today. I think we both swooned and got very broody.

Hello all, the signal here in Wales is so bad I can't reply to much! Things I remember: SoYo- I know it probably doesn't make things any easier, but I am also in awe at your staying power. Last night tiddler was up and inexplicably crying for an hour at 4am. This has never happened before and I found it really difficult, so my respect for those with bad sleepers is wven higher. Plonky: I'm not shredding at the mo as I have serious concerns about its effect on my pelvic floor, last time I basically felt like I'd just given birth all over again. Have prescribed myself 2 weeks of strengthening before I try again. Worse- you poor thing, let me know if there's anything I can do, I'm around all week. Keeping everything crossed for a simple outcome. And oh how shitty re: PCOS. Could you find a way to get back to the low GI somehow (even if it meant spending a lot of money?) with your friend, I'm guessing you've tried "what have I done?". Otherwise, yes, bake something yummy, write a note, buy beautiful flowers. Knock on door (with dd, she's irresistible!). If she answers, use dd as a cute buffer and just say 'I miss you, I've obviously done something, I'm sorry, tell me what it is so I can fix it' if she doesn't answer, leave cake, flowers, (not dd) and note to same effect. If she's truly lovely then I'm guessing she's not a sulker and there has obviously been a misunderstanding which needs sorting (because you're also lovely so doubt you've ACTUALLY done anything) alternatively, has your DH asked hers? Men are simple beings, perhaps they can get to the crux more quickly. Finally, and this is a low blow, tell her about your op, and say that whilst she's clearly pissed off with you, you'd really appreciate it if she could pop in on DH and dd to check they're ok whilst you're under the knife. Last resort though possibly...

That last one sounds really manipulative on second reading, but I'd still be tempted to give it a go.

Plonky- I still get teary when dd accidentally holds hands with other babies, wors and I were similarly emotional a couple of weeks back!

VJ in terms of the pelvic floor just do five to ten mins a day. They're tricky at first if you're not used to them. Everyone tells you it's like stopping peeing, which it is and that gives you the right pulling up feeling but you also need to pull up at the back from your bum at the same time so that it works the muscles all the way around the pelvic floor. I generally tell people to do them in runs of five with a break between and alternating between 5 fast and then five when you hold for longer, working up to 10secs. The one good thing about working in gynae is that we're all like Hitler about our pelvic floors! Exercises make a huge difference too so don't worry, it will get better!

wors she had a beautiful DD at 12:17pm, at home water birth. She's got such a lot of dark hair and is generally a lovely, sleepy, tiny newborn. DS looked ginormous next to her as he shouted and kicked and rolled around. I did get very broody! Also, have no advice on your PCOS, DSis suffers quite badly with hers but if you cracked it with your diet before, I'm sure that in time you'll crack it again. 4-5 months after giving birth is definitely bound to play havoc with hormones! And hope your op goes well!

I don't have any words of wisdom that haven't already been said regarding your friend. The best thing is probably to go round to see her because then you can discuss it face to face. It might even be something unrelated to you and may need a friend to go round anyway?

plonk and I had a lovely day with the DSs who were very adorable together. Even managing to have a very short nap together as well as gum some pasta and same time poonamis! Very in sync babies!

Thanks everyone, you are the best. Thanks for the heads up SoYo, the consultant was a bit old school - very little explanation other than 'we're going in'. I'll do the low GI thing again I guess, which given I don't have a sweet tooth is no great hardship, it's just more the hassle factor. The tiddler (though gorgeous) does like to time her post meal time I need a nap screamy moments for the 5 minutes I get to eat. So I eat cr*p. I will have a chat with her and explain the situation. I'm sure she will understand

As for my friend, well I can't think of anything specific, but I have to be frank been a bit immersed in worselet world for the past 5 months and rather neglectful of everything else. I probably should have asked how her kids are doing in their new jobs, remembered their birthdays, asked how she is doing more often... all that stuff. I've been in short a rather rubbish friend. I take some flowers and a card round tomorrow, with the worselet (good tip there VJ) and say sorry. No one is going to slam a door in a baby's face now are they?! If I am really lucky she may be out all day, in which case I can always leave the flowers and run away .

Plonky baby hand holding is beyond cute. I bet we'll look back on such times with misty eyed emotion, when they are 3 and punching each other in the head

And did I read that right - you mowed the lawn, and blitzed the house? Al in one go? At once? Without a poonami, whingy wail, or poked self in the eye so am going to SCREAM situation to deal with? . Wow. That must have been good whiskey you put in his bottle first thing

As for the shred thing - I took a look, what with being into all things fitness, and my take on it is approach with extreme caution. It isn't something to launch into as a first form of exercise post natal. The exercises are very high impact on the knees, extreme on the core, and the core ones use the lumber region of the spine. We're still at the stage where joints are a bit looser than normal, so less able to withstand impact, our cores are shot, and our backs are recovering from the stress of a pregnancy bump, and baby lifting. If you have any stomach muscle separation at all, crunches can be damaging. Put your hand on your stomach when doing an exercise. If you feel even a tiny hint of them peaking in the middle - stop.

And there ends the lecture.... repeated almost verbatim from that given to me by Mr nice personal trainer man who is very tedious about not letting me injure myself.

Right, I think it is bed time. I have a sleeping baby, so should be making the most of it not ar5ing about on the internet

Fab news something . The tiddler had lots of dark hair too. She has none now, and currently gunning for blond, but I will always have a particular weakness for dark haired newborn baby girls.

DS had lots of dark hair but now sports a dark blonde crop. Lovely news Something (but nope, still not broody).

Worse, if she has kids I'm sure she'll understand why you've been rather absorbed, ESP with the other issues as well. Hope air can be cleared.

No appetite here either. Only four feeds today, done in halves always with leftovers we have, however, duly put on our 2 oz this week though and DS now weighs in at 16lbs 6 at 10 weeks, which from the charts seems ok still. He also happily eats the first half but then gets that disgusted face if I try with the rest.

Sitting in the lounge today wondering what the strange noise was - turned out all the parcel tape on our moving boxes IS PEELING OFF!!! I'm so done with packing now, there are so many 'last bits' we can't pack until Saturday. We'll have no furniture at all until Tuesday either!

DS is now saying what sounds like 'mummy' all the time, along with this horrific intentional gargling noise and much laughter when tickled. I just wish he'd cuddle me nicely without squiggling or slapping me round the face a bit more... His blond hair's coming back, but some of the hairs he had at birth (and I mean literally three) are still there and about 3 inches long now - they look ridiculous!

Hope everyone gets a good sleep tonight, we're not doing that much either

16.6 lb blimey. We hit 13lb 10.6 yesterday and we are climbing up the centiles...

High chair arrived yesterday, so once I've got it put together I can start getting him used to sitting in it.

We'll be 21 weeks tomorrow... Where is the time going?