It's April 2013, the time is now & HERE ARE OUR BABIES!

[toobreathless]

Our first post natal thread!

Cooking & Cleaning can wait till tomorrow
for children grow up we've learnt to our sorrow
So wipe away cobwebs and dust go to sleep
I'm cuddling my baby cause babies don't keep!

A thread to celebrate the highs of life with a gorgeous newborn and the lows of sleepless nights, stitches, feeding traumas & Baby blues.

bonadea I run on the theory that a peaceful evening with DH is something to aspire to after a couple (or a few) months, once they are sleeping more at night and less in the day. Baby E officially goes to bed with daddy at about 10.30/11pm, but she is generally asleep downstairs before then, just downstairs... That allows me to get myself sorted before she comes up, so that if I was doing the last bf, I'd be ready to just go back to bed after that last feed. As it is, DH is doing the last feed as a bottle, so I'm currently asleep by 10pm, which is rather good if E sleeps till 3.30am like she has done the last couple of nights!

With the HV, I'm also in London, so get one visit and then the rest are at the baby clinic, although this time, I get a follow up check at 6 weeks, which I didn't have last time. My mum is a retired HV and she is shocked at the small number of home visits they do in London - apparently their main role at this stage is to pick up any indications of post natal depression, before anything tragic can happen, and get the appropriate treatment...

It sounds like everyone is being kept very busy with these little people!
Right now, Evan is asleep on me in my sling - we have just got back from the school run where he finally settled after grizzling or screaming since 4am. (Hopefully that will teach DP to put the nappy on correctly - Evan woke up soaked...)

I am using my HugaBub sling today although it is quite thick so I only tend to use it for the morning school run when it is still a bit chilly. I only have a t-shirt on under it and Evan is in a footless sleepsuit so we are pretty comfy right now.
I also have a wrap sling from here which I use a lot and was a bargain.
I have a moby for when he gets a bit bigger and I also have a mei tai from here which was also a bargain. I use it quite a bit, especially when it is windy as I have one with the hood.
Then I have a ring sling somewhere which I might use again when he is big enough for hip carrying.

As far as my HV goes, she came round once Evan was home and then I cancelled the second appointment the following week as there was somewhere else I wanted to be. I take Evan to be weighed at the weekly clinic - unless I don't feel like it! It is a lovely place though and I often meet up with friends there and we sit around chatting.

And we have got back into the swing of things regarding DTD in the last fortnight or so, so probably once Evan got to about 6 weeks-ish. We are using condoms at the moment but are discussing DP having a vasectomy as we are sure we have completed the family now we have 3DC.

And Evan is still sleeping more than not - although he is beginning to have a few wakeful periods during the day. He is 9 weeks old on Thursday which means he is coming up for 3 weeks corrected and is over 9lb now so is doing really well.

Off, once again, to check on what everyone else has been up to. I do check in regularly to read but as Evan tends to sleep on me most of the time to help his reflux and the DDs keep me busy I don't have time to post.

?? What baby groups are people going to/planning on going to? I never did very much with the DDs but am taking a lot more ML with Evan so thought perhaps we should do something.

Bona we've got a rough routine with a 7pm bedtime - only as it fits in with DD's bedtime. We have our evening meal at five when DH gets in, bath both kids and then I feed H and put him down to sleep while DH does DD's bedtime. If H goes off quickly, I'll do DD's stories. I'll then go to bed at ten (sometimes seven ).

It's all pretty relaxed though and I'm expecting it to be disrupted many times!

Thanks for the tips kelles I'll get some probiotics today, great excuse to buy yogurts!

HV visited once, then said unless we wanted her just pop into clinic for weight. She will see us again for 6 week check though, oh and she visited when I was pregnant too, just once.

Night wasn't too bad, fed at 8.30, 11.30, 5 and about too again now. Did someone mention night nappys? I might try the pampers ones as sometimes I think she is waking up wet rather than hungry.

bona dd is now seven weeks and its only been in the last 2 or 3 days that we've had anything like a bedtime routine for her. She was falling asleep in the lounge anywhere between 8 and 10pm. She suddenly started finding that too over stimulating so now I feed her in the dark at about 7 and she's tucked up in bed around 7:30. Have you tried doing a dream feed when you head to bed? If his tummy's full when you get into bed then it might buy you a few extra hours of sleep.

I've had my first really tough couple of days coping with two children this week. DS is really poorly poor thing. He was a bit off colour all weekend, seemed ok yesterday but his behaviour was a nightmare, and finally got sent home from daycare after he started vomiting. It's been really hard trying to comfort him when all he wants is to sit on my lap and have cuddles as well as trying to feed and settle dd

After everyone feeds before putting them down for the night, do you cuddle to sleep or just put them down and lee them settle themselves, any tips? Bought Ewan the dream sheep today so wondering if and how anyone uses that?

Hello!
Lovely to read what everyone is up to!
Dd is now 6 weeks old. We have seen hv once and due to have her visit next wk. Attending weigh in clinic when we have chance.
Have just started trying to get her into a routine. Bathed last night at 6.30, bottle at 7 in dark bedroom and put into basket. However she didn't fancy that so she came downstairs and fell asleep on her play mat. Had another bottle about ten and into basket asleep.
She then woke at 3 and 6.30 for feeds.
I do try to put her down awake so she can self sooth to sleep but if she's not keen I will let her nodd off on me first. Generally after night feeds she goes straight back in basket.
We dtd about a week ago, wasn't at all sore like it was after previous births.
Has anyone looked at child isa's? Older children have trust funds so want to do something for dd

num3 we were only talking about child isa the other day. Our older two have trust funds that we transfer money into each month (not much but it should add up by the time they can access the money) and we think we should do the same for Evan.

We need to get him a bank account too as the girls have them.

Need to send form off for CB too before we reach the 'back-dating' deadline.

We don't really have a routine with Evan - he tends to dictate the day and evening! (Our mornings have to be very structured in order to get the DDs to school.)

He does tend to have a routine for himself but it does seem to be changing as he is beginning to take more milk at each feed - although that means he sicks up more and takes quite a long time sometimes to wind. We are using infacol at the moment - it might be a placebo but it does seem to make some difference so we will stick with it whilst it seems to help him.

We live in a smallish flat and mostly use one room as living room/bedroom so baby user goes into basket pretty much any time she is asleep (which is a lot!) I suspect this system is going to make it hell putting her in own room, currently her room is full of junk but we plan to fix it by 6 months.

I wanted to go HV clinic but she is sleeping so nicely and I think it might rain. Also OH is sleeping still so no one to help me on stairs, that's actually main reason. I hate second floor!

Grrr I should just go, such a wuss!

my ds1 is 5 and his trust fund is currently worth over 3000 which I am impressed with, its a shares one tho so swings and roundabouts! He gets 25 per month into it and had 500 off government.
Ds2 is 4 and his is worth just under 2000 with same payments

Only thing I dislike about trust funds is the access at 18. I am considering stopping monthly payments and setting up another for when they are 21 as I think it would be used better

Trish I had an infection in my csection scar and it hurt like hell, the area was only about half an inch but was like a real stabbing pain, which is why I got it checked out. Am almost finished on second round of abs. First had fluxocllin something, now metro something....

Trish, my c section scar has opened up (again) and is leaking straw coloured fluid, it's not infected and its not painful, so maybe just taking its time to heal?
I'm really worried about my milk supply, neither breast feel full, even after a few hours between feeds, infant they feel empty, god knows how he's getting anything out of them.
Last time with DS I was prescribed donperidone to increase volume, which wasn't a problem then (failure to thrive, because although he was putting weight on he was 'not on the chart' ) I wonder if they would prescribe me them again, as this time volume is an issue.
We've only had 2 visits from the HV but we go for a weigh in in a few weeks, but one of my friends wife is a HV and said if I'm curious about his weight I can pop over for a quick weigh
We started a routine for ds2 from when he came home, although he doesn't always want to play ball! stares at DS 2 who is asleep on the sofa when he should be getting a bath
We didn't with ds1 and until about 6 months ago he was going to bed at 9-10pm, we have brought his bedtime forward to 7pm (ish) and he's so much happier because of it, so ds2 is supposed to go to bed at the same time.

Thanks for the info in your section scars! Nurse looked at it today (had to go to get BP checked) and she said its fine, think I'm just being impatient with wanting it to heal 100%!

I want to get back to exercise! Need to sort myself out!

Interesting to read night/bed routines as we don't put him in our room with us til we go to bed (usually midnight with the midnight feed)

This is just cos we are night owls! Maybe we should be putting him to Bed after his 8/9pm feed? But we wouldn't be in the room, so we would need to start using the baby monitor!

Our friend gave us the angel care one with movement sensor pad thing but doesn't have the instructions anymore!!

Thanks to those of you who sent tips my way about working patterns and freelancing suggestions. I am going to look into proofreading and indexing as they are fairly close to my existing skills sets. I do worry they won't pay very well though!

My breasts have stopped producing anything now though I have been trying with the pump. The doctor has given me some domperidone which I started taking today so we'll see whether it works. Any other expressing tips welcome.

In terms of DTD, we have tried once but I found it quite uncomfortable which is weird because I have healed nicely and all is well down there! I have just started taking cerazette which I haven't come across before. I wanted to get a coil but apparently they don't so this until 6 weeks after the birth and there is also a waiting list for the coil clinic!

Sam is a month old now. He is doing OK but had another scary episode last week. It seems to go in cycles. He gets gradually weaned off everything, copes really well, and then, just when we're all thinking he's about ready to go home, he does something spectacular and ends up being put back on all support and drugs and it starts all over again! He was weighed today and apparently weighs less than when he was born. He does have a desperate, hungry look about him but he's only just got back to digesting food so they don't want to push it too hard. It is sad and frustrating to see though. He was really grumpy today.

Oh Empress, what a journey you've had already. I hope and pray that this time Sam can be weaned off and stay off everything.

Trish I've been so exhausted by the time she's finished feeding most evenings as soon as she sleep I do to! We just tried putting her down in the bedroom with the monitor on but she screamed her head off! You can download the Angelcare instructions but if you can't find them I have them - I could photocopy and post them to you.

Thanks for that faith! I think I will take you up on that as I'd like to have a hard/real copy! I will private message you now xxx

Dd has just nodded off on me after her bottle so I am about to try putting her to bed wish me luck!

Oh empress hope Sam completely stabilises so he can come home soon xx

My supply has tailed off loads (even after hiring the medela symphony) but the docs already said they dont give that drug here

empress, I really hope that Sam stabilizes and is home very soon. Stay strong x

It's been great reading through everyone's news. I can't name check as I'm on my phone and still have baby brain but to everyone having a challenging time.

Teapiglet is ab erratic sleeper and isn't good at self settling. She likes to feed before sleeping and nod off on me. I've just started reading the Baby Whisperer and think we might have developed bad habits already, Teapiglet will be three weeks tomorrow.

One odd thing is that Teapiglet now refuses to take a bottle. We'd been mix feeding with one bottle a day until two days ago when suddenly she completely rejected the bottle and now won't have it at all. Does anyone have any tips on how to introduce the odd bottle? I may need to pop into work for half a day in a few weeks but that's dependent on DD taking a bottle. Is there a window where you need to introduce the bottle or you miss the opportunity?

Wishing everyone a good sleep x

Thanks for sharing your experiences with hv. I live on the same street as surgery so she did a home visit once and then asked if I would mind popping in for other appointments as its so close. I think she may be seeing me regularly due to a bumpy start with breastfeeding as she always asks how the feeding is going.

We start bedtime routine at 6 when Dad gets in from work. We do bath, dress, feed in bed with low lighting and no talking and then she is popped into her Moses basket to nod off, all usually by 7. I am very tempted to go to bed at this time myself!

Thanks for the update on Sam, thinking if you all.

Hi all, am new to this...just been reading posts while feeding DD - 3wks old now and fallen asleep on me.

What a relief to realise all mums are going through similar issues with their newborns as I am! No matter what everyone said while i was pg i just did not understand how much life would change after having a baby.

Empress...good luck with Sam, hoping all goes well for you.

Welcome Kitten! Xx congrats on the birth of your baby!

Welcome kitten what did you call your DD if you don't mind me asking?

Having an emotional wibble here tonight. Feel like I'm not doing my best for either DD. I worry that I'm not stretching DD1 enough and that DD2 just gets forgotten as I'm too busy racing around with DD1. I will admit to being a real perfectionist and am probably putting too much pressure on myself to have the perfect house/children/body! DH to be fair is very good at helping but is busy sorting our house after the move.

In terms of routine we don't have one. Well this is not strictly true DD1 (just 2 years) has a pretty good routine and DD2 just slots in. I have no desire to try a proper bedtime as I don't like the thought of her being upstairs in the evenings while I am downstairs and after sharing me with her sister all day I like to let her sleep on my chest and generally give her plenty of attention. If I am doing housework she sleeps in her Quinny carrycot.

DTD?? Ha ha ha ha! Not yet here, I am VERY nervous, not that it will hurt but that despite using contraception correctly I seem to be very fertile, I conceived one pregnancy after missing one pill. I have my hands full at present and the thought of another one right now terrifies me. I will probably go for the progesterone only pill (mini pill) but worry this wont be enough...

empress continuing to think of you & your boy and hoping that you get home soon. You are so strong.

Apologies for not name checking more, will hopefully be back tomorrow with a bit more time.

Just popping in quickly as am up feeding. Am on phone so sorry limited name checks.

Kitten - yes it's good to know we're not alone!

Toobreathless - you said it yourself, you are being hard on yourself. Both your DCs are being well cared for and loved. It is still very early days - we are still in 'survival mode' with a newborn so cut yourself some slack.

Incidentally, the weather is wild outside where I am! Lots of wind and rain. Love the sound when I am inside cosy and tucked up with my beautiful boy as he feeds