November 2012 - They WERE sleeping, what happened?

[StuntNun]

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/1688444-November-2012-Forget-50-books-in-2013-well-have-50-threads

Well, as predicted, DP didn't wake when O did, at 2. So I kicked him. I got back to sleep, and woke at 4.35 to find O asleep splayed across DP. As perfuckingusual. He fed again at 6, and then up for the day according to DP, more like he couldn't be arsed putting him back to sleep at 7.30. I've been encouraging him to sleep til 8.30, as he is going down at 9.30, and I think 11 hours sleep is enough, and don't want to encourage less.

Seriously sure it is easier to do it myself, so we are singing from the same hymn sheet. IYKWIM. I'm trying to be grateful, and believe me, I am. I feel human again this morning afternoon but I don't want to do it at the expense of O and encouraging good sleeping habits. I am more than happy to have him in bed with me safely, when I or DP have deliberately put him in with us because he won't settle, but it is the falling asleep with him that I worry about, because DP is such a heavy sleeper, and O is not in safe positions.

DP just keeps saying he has to keep doing it, and he has to learn because I am back to work in 8 weeks and do 2 weeks of nights out of 4, so he is going to have to do the nights then. I'm pretty sure now I won't be back in 8 weeks, I still can't stay out the house and walk around for more than 3 hours. Less usually. I know he does, but he just keeps doing the same thing over and over. It would make no difference if he got up and sat on the sofa, he falls asleep there too. Can anyone give him any tips?!!

Have put O for his nap in his swaddle. The last week or 2 he has been waking himself up from his naps screaming angrily. So far 30 minutes, and not a bit of movement. Phew.

Bry I can't say more than VQ has. Wise words. I am thinking of you. Your positive attitude is just what your daughter needs. You sound like a fabulous mummy!

VQ It is the teasing that feels the hardest sometimes. You know they can sleep longer, so just fucking sleep longer damnit!! I'll accept 6 hours. 6 hours, piece of piss, but no. We are on roughly 4 hourly feeds round the clock, with other wakenings for god knows what reason. Sleep deprivation is a fucking bitch I'd like to beat up with an axe. GRRRRR. I need to be more grateful of DP doing some of them. Trying..... tryinggggggggggggggggggggggggg! .

PR Thank fuck it was just a one off!

Still loving the NUK bottles here. He hasn't taken more than 6oz since that first bottle we gave him, but they are making feeding easier for him. It's very nice. Still at how much money I've spent on Avent bottles and all different fucking teats. Worked it out and I've spent well over £100 on pissing bottles and teats. The NUK ones don't need different teats, but I'm a little at the speed of the flow and am not convinced a newborn would cope with that flow! It comes out of the teat without you sucking or touching the thing!

Achievements this week. Fuck. Erm. .

No.

None.

Damn.

Eye up ladies, well I think we're over the 12 week growth spurt. Normal feeding has resumed and last night she slept. I won't say how long for fear of missiles being thrown at me.

Bry- my thought are with you, you sound like such a fab mummy.

detective- I've also got 4 Avent bottles that B won't drink from. Only one has been used.

bryz, as everyone else has said on here. I hope you do get all the support you need x

Just call me dummy busters, dummies are obviously for wimps! Managed to peel Tommy off me long enough to clean the kitchen and drag the hoover round.

Boo to non-sleeping babies.

Sorry you didn't get a break VQ. And anyone else with non sleeping babies.

L is testing my pma with his not sleeping. I hope it is sleep regression because that means its temporary right? He fed 4+ times in the night. Each time dozing off as he was clearly shattered too. But then couldn't stay asleep more than a few mins. Used to be: dummy in, fall asleep, dummy falls or pushed out, deep sleep. Now dummy falls out, wriggle, writhe, cry. Only prolonged shhing & stroking seems to work and then only for a while. It's like he is suddenly sleeping very lightly, never getting into full restful sleep. I am struggling to doze off too as half waiting for next cry. However my lovely DH took him at 7am, my head hit the pillow and next I knew it was 10.30. So I cannot complain (too much).

Bry that is hard to hear and I wish you all the best. Hope you get some good support for you and your family, it sounds like you have already been very proactive in getting help for your dd and hopefully the diagnosis will help further in identifying her needs and what can be done to help her achieve her full potential.

Eliza cf was one of my worries too (thanks Dr G) but as others say it should have been picked up at the heel prick and I think there would be other signs. With L he simply wasn't getting as much milk as it appeared from his constant feeding and the additional calories from formula have worked a treat in helping him gain weight. I hope if it is a similar situation or else the coeliac option then you get good aftercare and a plan for once E is out of hospital. Lots of love, thinking of you both.

This is for detective and anyone else who likes laughing at cats.

www.buzzfeed.com/summeranne/28-cats-who-have-no-idea-how-they-ended-up-here?s=mobile

I'll try again!

www.buzzfeed.com/summeranne/28-cats-who-have-no-idea-how-they-ended-up-here?s=mobile

ROTFLMAO!!! Bahahaha! Poor kitties!!

detective remember with NHS you need to give 8 weeks notice in writing of planned return to work. Last time I thought it was 4 weeks and had to take another 4 weeks mat leave. Bastards.

J eventually settled 1pm, but woke screaming 2 mins ago. He may have self settled. He is shattered.

Rant alert:

I lost the plot with DH. At 12.45 he was still saying to the girls he would take them out, so I told him to just fucking take them out! They have been going stir crazy and keep wanting to know what is happening. He says he doesn't know where to take them, so I say the local park and shop. He says that would only take an hour, I say I only fucking need an hour, as do they. He wants to go somewhere in the car. I say why? It will cost money in petrol, drinks, snacks, he will need to take spare nappies and clothes etc. I say yes I am fucking angry with him as if he took them out more than once in a blue moon they would not be such hard work. I say if J was ff I could take them out and leave J with him. I take J up to cot, and he goes out. With kids and car. I know not where. I wonder why he had kids sometimes as all he wants to do is watch football or look on fucking iPad.

I am having a shitty Sunday it seems. Grr!

I particularly like the one of the cat and the spinning fan

vq hugs.

Sorry to all struggling with sleep deprivation and rubbish dhs.

I'm more tired today with 6 hours sleep than being up every 2 hours

Detective i have to have phone / book to avoid falling asleep during night feeds, would that help your dh?

bry everyone else has said everything so will send you and ((hugs))

toomany LOL #6 & #10 are my favourites!!

VQ totally get where you're coming from. Can't complain today, but most every other day...

VQ I won't be staying on mat leave, i'll have to be on sick leave. I've given them my return date in writing 10 times over including email so I have proof.

I can't stay on mat leave as we'd be utterly fucked. Will be bad enough being on sick leave. I just can't see things improving enough in the next 8 weeks. Obviously if it does, i'll go back gladly at the minute!! but I just don't see much difference from months ago. :( Fucking stupid episiotomy. The good news is I think my pelvic floor feels stronger with the amount of PF's I'm doing. Hopefully it will help the epis pain soon.

Also. Sorry DH is being a dick. Why don't they just 'get' it? It is as if they think their lives don't need to change much while ours change completely. Grrrrr.

Lilliana I have to do that too, I told DP to do it ages ago, and he does. But he still falls asleep. Knobber!!

Oh yes detective get him to sit in an upright/dining rm chair & make sure he's cold (although this might be easier said than done given his sweat issue :) ).

He suggested that this morning, bringing up a dining room chair. I just worry that he would fall asleep on that, and drop O!! I might get him to sit on the landing floor?!! That'll teach him .

Well we did our day out. Half a day. Went out to lunch and both children were brilliant. Then had a lovely walk to a local viewpoint. Fab. Feeling reborn. No more puking, so glad we took the risk. Both girls asleep. Bliss.

God I love my children when they are fucking sleeping.

I am very very lucky. Even if I would like to throttle the oldest one at least 20 times a day right now. I still love the buggers to death! Having them has definitely been the best decision I have ever made. Life is great, but they make it perfect!

When does the postnatal hair loss fuck off then? I'm quite surprised I have not found a bald patch or several by now. It is really quite extreme. I have to hoover/or lint roller my bed every day because it is covered with long blonde hairs. I pulled 6 massive clumps of the fucking stuff out my bum crack a couple of days ago, and that was just from one episode of brushing and drying it.

I've just pulled 8 of my hairs off Oscar FFS!

28 days here vq currently sat with my trusts policy.

Just been for a lovely long walk!!! Tried out the big carrier well dh did! I use the ergo!!

detective I have the same issue (hair, bum crack etc) and feel like I've lost enough to fully clothe the head of a baldy twice over :)

BTW thread in site stuff from MNHQ says not to report any more spam for the mo... Tosspots (spammers not mnhq)

pr yay for a lovely trip out.

bry big hugs and or maybe would be better! No words to add to the wise ladies of the quiche but am thinking of you.

detective I'm still losing lots of hair too. Funnily enough I'd not really noticed at home but have noticed in hospital that my hair is everywhere! Would like to say its because I clean regularly at home but that would be a lie

On that topic I dread to think what the state of the place will be like when I get home as I can guarantee DH will do fuck all housework wise.

DH and DD1 just left. They came around 10:30am and it was lovely to have them here earlier as it was a long day yesterday without visitors till 3pm. It's lovely weather here and I got to chase DD around in the garden area for a while so I got to see some sun and actually feel tired now but in a nice way. Only disadvantage of that means I don't get to talk to DH much as he stays with E that doesn't really matter. E now sleeping so giving me a chance to catch up on mumsnet and I might even get to read the Sunday paper after. What a luxury that will be. My friend is coming back this evening so I'll have some adult company later. The consultant said we will be here for a couple more days. So I am very thankful for family and friends coming to visit and also that I have lots of lovely people willing to look after DD1 so DH doesn't need to take time off work. Things could be a hell of a lot worse and I have a very positive mental attitude at the moment. It's amazing what a bit of sun can do! Ask me again at 3am after very little sleep with not much here happening and I expect it will be a very different post!

It's great to hear you sounding so positive Eliza . It is amazing what a bit of time in the sun can do. A few more days sounds reasonable. How is LO doing?

kirrin how is your puking toddler today?

I had my hair cut shorter in anticipation of hairmageddon and it certainly hasn't disappointed.

sending you hugs eliza .